Martini Momma

Back north. Home.

2009-11-09T12:31:31-06:00

A weekend away…

Our wee foursome is home from a weekend getaway that was unimaginably fantastic. Last Friday, I took the day off and we packed up and headed out to Fargo for the weekend with my BIL (Blaine) & SIL (Lis) & Maddie Dawg (his new nick name) and my sis (Jay) and BIL (B-Rad). We checked in poolside to The Holiday Inn and vegged out (as much as is possible with little ones).

Truth be told, I loved every minute of it. And in my new quest to be introspective, I found myself challenged and looking inward at many times…

1. Staying in a hotel with children is defying all rules on good hygiene. Initially I was beside myself with anxious thoughts of all the G-E-R-M-S in our presence. Germs in the pool, germs on the carpet, germs on the remote, germs… you get the picture. I knew that in order for us all to enjoy ourselves, I simply had to LET GO. And although it was NOT easy, I did.

2. We took the boys everywhere we went (minus a 2 hour girls power shop). We took the boys to Tar-gey (as Mollie calls it). We took the boys to Kohls, to Scheels and to Hornbachers. We took the boys out for breakfast, lunch and even dinner at a steakhouse. We rode the ferris wheel twice and dispersed intermittent candies and throughout it all, the 3 kids were unbelievable. For me, that was really confronting the unknown and watching as we pushed the line a little further and our boys, including Maddie Dawg, stepped up to our challenge. Honestly, I used to think so much about what-ifs when it came to taking kids out. These days, I am embracing our family, coaching my boys on appropriate social behaviors and loving every minute that they spend carving out their personalities.

3. I got new boobs, not IMPLANTS (although I could easily see why one might ask). New purple BOMBSHELL boobs. Yes, I invested heavily in ME! I spent big time and money lifting my spirits (and boobs) at Victoria Secret. As soon as I entered the store, I walked up the first sales clerk I could find and blurted out, “These are not my original boobs, those ones are LONG gone. I donated my curves to my family and now I am looking for a remake in a natural kind of way. The staff was AWESOME and so are my new girls.

4. Jay. I really related to Kath’s post about how much she loves her sister. I feel the same way about mine, although I am much more fortunate that we three live in the same city. Crys and I love about 1 kilometer apart. Jay and I live about 25 kilometers apart WHICH I GET IS NOT FAR. What it is however though is more planned. Years ago we walked together, we had breakfasts together, we popped in to one another’s house several times a week. This past weekend was a chance for us to really catch up, to have a few drinks, to laugh, to swap make up tips and for me it was a chance to be so grateful for my sis. She really went out of her way to help me with the boys and to accommodate my schedule. Jay – I *heart* you.

5. The US really knows how to do it up. I am always astounded at how grandiose everything is south of the border. They have everything a young boy could imagine to transform himself into a car or a superhero. Many times throughout the weekend G would shriek, “Oh my goodness, oh my goodness. I love it. What is it?”. And yet, the irony for me is that I couldn’t find a recycling outlet anywhere. Great to go on vacation, better to be Canadian.

6. My SIL Lis. Each summer, Lisa Parnell and I spend hours at the cottage blabbing about every detail of our lives, our thoughts, our opinions. With the weather what it was, we saw one another less and I really missed her laisse faire attitude. Very little ruffles Miss Lisa. I found myself thinking about how unselfish and relaxed she is as a momma. Many times throughout the weekend, our room was instantaneously a wrestling ring. Wee boys in diapees and gotchies squared off to wrestle with their dad/uncle. They knocked over the alarm clock, stepped in potato chips all the while, laughing hysterically. I loved watching it unfold but would have preferred them trashing Lis’s room. Lol. .

7. Lastly, if my think tank wasn’t already full, Saturday as I snuggled in to bed, I thought to myself how much fun we already had had. In a 2 night time frame, my hubby and I barely touched, but our boys were more than prepared to take advantage of the fact that our beds were within feet of theirs. Every time I rolled over, I faced a new little one switching beds and spots. Sweet dreams were not in the cards for us, but that was worth the trade off for family fun.

OK – Here’s my push… what are you trading off?

Home is Where the Heart Is...

2009-11-09T05:07:00-06:00

I have always believed that home is where you make it and it can be made anywhere. Some places are more desired than others for many different reasons....career, family, weather, whatever.

I think a person learns valuable lessons and deep secrets of the soul when they move away from 'home' and explore the rest of the world. I always welcome travel:)

In my own life, I have lived away from family, up North, in a small town population 6000, in a BIG city with my husband, and here in my hometown Winnipeg with my children.

Tommorrow, my sister is coming home with kids in tow and I can barely breathe I am so excited. Although, we stay connected and close I miss them so much and want so badly to partake in all the little things. I wanted to drive over and pick up my neice and nephew for a sleepover this weekend because they madly needed help. I wanted Lilly to play pretend video games with Evy at Harris's hockey game this morning. I wanted to go for a run with my sister and our dogs!

I want them home:) because a piece of my heart is with them and until they are close this might never quite totally feel like home.

OK - time to weigh in...

2009-11-06T06:56:00-06:00

"Peace is not something you wish for; it's something you make, Something you do, Something you are, And Something you give away."

~Robert Fulgram

Closing out my week on BEING your Best and taking care of YOU, I thought I would end with an inspirational recap. One of the conversations that we had at the Retreat got everyone thinking about what makes them tick. As I mentioned earlier in the week - do what makes YOU happy.

So, as various conversations were unfolding about love, serenity, and organization, from across the room, I heard The Coach. This is why she is such a GREAT coach. She softly said, I know what I need each day to make me happy. I need FRESH AIR and GOOD FOOD. I believe that she elaborated on what these things meant to her and what else she needed, but instantly, I thought..."Wow - that's brilliant." She knows what she needs.

So, in between trying to settle the monkey that is in my head - swinging from branch to branch - I thought, "What do I need each day?"

And after a pensive week of wondering, I have come to this conclusion...

Each day I need to be active, that may mean taking the stairs or wearing ankle weights. It may mean a run or just a walk...but I need to move. Each day I need to be organized, if I am out of sync, I - am - out - of - sync. I know it is anal and I am trying to let go of the 'NOT Necessaries" but still WANT them on my list, ready to tick off should time allow. Most importantly, I need love every day. I love my boys, I love my family and I love my friends.

A wise woman, once told me that certain people are brought to this earth to be a channel through which learning, love, inspiration are communicate with others. I know that in order to be my best, I need TIME with my husband, I NEED time to snuggle my boys, to rub their bellies and to whisper in their ears how MUCH I love them. I need my girlfriends to raise me up, to challenge me and to INSPIRE me. I need to write, this blog for me, to be in sync.

When those buckets are full, all else is simply bonus. I am thrilled to have home cooked food to nurture my body and now peace to quiet my monkey. Yesterday Simone left a comment on meditation from this website and I am going to check it out.

So, here`s my conclusion on a week of being my best!

This week, I went to Hot Yoga at Moksha where I was quiet with myself, I went to bed early, I let the house be a little messy, I finished my article, I woke up early, I gave my entire nursery furniture to someone who needed it more than we needed money and I found myself reserving judgment. Ok, now it's your turn to weigh in. Did you honor yourself and DO something for you?

When your best isn't good enough

2009-11-05T17:35:27-06:00

I am a working mother. I have a full time job as a teacher. I have a full time job as a mother. My priority is a given, the latter, without question. I find that my 2 worlds collide on a daily basis, as you can never really step out of role of mother. I might be in the middle of teaching order of operations but if daycare calls to see if I brought the blanky that day, while then I have no choice but to wear the mother hat. Blanky trumps math. If a collar bone is broken, school day or not, I know where I must be.

Husbands like mine are a treasure, he shares in the upbringing of these children with all his heart. He loves them the same, we discipline as a team, he worries about them when need be ( not as a neurotic like me but as a caring and loving father instead). He gives of his time, his attention, his everyhting without ever holding back. He does not, however, get involved in the small details that occupy every moment of my being, that is a mother's duty alone. He doesn't worry about where the blanky is or whether they have eaten enough vegeatbles. He isn't consumed with the guilt of knowing that the Grammas are carrying the burden of driving our son to school each day. He won't stay up at night wondering if the princess socks are washed and ready or whether there are enough soothers in the crib to last the night (never are, another post, another day). I do. I try my best. Every Day. This week my best was not good enough.

If 3 strikes were out as a mother, I'd be packing my bags.

On Monday, I forgot my lunch and right alongside my lunch sat Ty's snack for the day at home instead of his back pack. I called the school in a panic wondering if I should call a gramma to come and bring something and the secretary let me know that she would take a little fruit snack down to him. Bless her heart. I sent a sweet note the next day to let them know how grateful. Strike 1. On Wednesday, I sent my son to school on a day 5 without his library book to exchange. No biggy, I know but it is when every other kid gets a new book to check out and mine doesn't it and it really is MY fault. Ty forgives me and that is the bottom line. Strike 2. Wednesday is an entirely new ball game, the kind that you really cannot forgive, the kind of thing that I haven't told my dearest friends because I don't want them to think I'm crap at this juggleing both worlds thing. I arranged for my son to be picked up by daddy because I had a staff meeting after school. Chad went in early and I even sent a reminder to him right before I went to my meeting. Remember to pick up the kids and get Ty first, every detail though out, except the most important. I get a call half way through my meeting. "Hi Mollie" Hi Kathleen (secretary at Ty's school and used to be at my school) "I have Ty with me here." Oh, Is he OK? Is he sick? "No, it was early dismissal and there was no one here to pick him up. "OMG" What more can I say? I called Gramma Judy, who once again bailed me out, even she knew it was early dismassal. Strike 3 and in fact, I believe I was ejected from the game at this point.

By the time I see my boy, I am in tears as I apologize over and over. As kids do, they pick up and move forward, "Mom, it's not the end of the world and they gave me a sucker."

I know it's NOT the end of the world and I'm NOT the first mom to do it but it doesn't make you feel any better about the decision to work. I have beat myself up for a day and I'm going to let it go, it is my plight as a working mom. My challenge this week is going to be to figure out a system that actually works that will keep us all on track. I know without a doubt, that there is room for improvement here.

How to Put Yourself First and Engineer Your Best Life

2009-11-05T11:26:52-06:00

Attention Women: How to Put Yourself First and Engineer Your Best Life

Three Week Tele-Seminar from the Comfort of your Own Home

The dawn of a NEW YEAR has always been a time for reflecting on the past, yet more importantly, looking forward to the upcoming year. It's a time to reflect on the changes we want (or need) to make. It is a time to resolve to follow through on those changes.

Do you or someone you know start each year with a list of resolutions? Do you or someone you know fail annually on fulfilling these personal commitments? Do you ever question WHY they don’t work? Why don’t they stick???

How would you like to ring in a NEW YEAR - 2010 with realistic goals and better still, have the tools to make them a reality? Did you know that people who explicitly make resolutions are 10 times more likely to attain their goals than people who don’t? Imagine the personal possibilities. Be accountable!

Sadly, according to John C. Norcross (University of Scranton) more than 40 to 45% of American adults make one or more resolutions each year; however, by 6 months less than half are honoring them.

WHY? I will show and teach you introspective ways to push past the failure.

In this Tele-Seminar, I will help you to explore:

· Your current life and happiness scale

· Your values and Future Self

· What makes a habit?

· Setting realistic and obtainable goals

· Learning to say YES and NO

· Provide tools of inspiration and motivation

If you’re curious and want to live your best year EVER, then you truly NEED enroll in this upcoming 3 week tele-class now—space is limited and it’s filling up quickly.

If you have any additional questions, please contact me at kath@inspiredbykath.com

Price: $75

Location: The comfort of your own home (you can dial-in from anywhere)
Date: November 24, December 1 and December 8
Time: 7:30 – 8:30 CST

You will receive worksheets and a comprehensive list of resources to supplement your learning in this class.

About the Facilitator: Kathryn Gompf is a former Engineer who has designed her life to be exactly what she wants. She has a homemade MBA obtained through the trials and joy of owning a retail boutique and is trained as a Professional Coach through The Coaches Training Institute (CTI). In her spare time, she enjoys hanging with her two kids, husband, and dog, running marathons, ‘clean’ cooking and beer.