Since then I learned to pick my battles. I can often be heard asking my children "is this the one fight you want to die over?" That his how we choose whether or not to engage.

I have now learned that we don't always have an option. Sometimes we don't choose the battle, the battle chooses us.

This fight is one I am willing to die over. There are only so many hours in the day and though I will not stop writing and taking pictures, the blog here has to be shelved as this battle will require all of my time and effort.

Onward.

developing an appreciation for quirky humour.

accepting the things i cannot change.

sending another load of clothes to the charity bin.

lamenting the time wasted trying to change things.

returning to canyon ranch this spring. happy me!

celebrating that i've stuck with project life for three weeks, so far.

planning how i can best organize the inside of cupboards and closets.

embracing that things are happening, just not quick enough.

enjoying becoming more involved and engaged. daily.

keeping my eye on the prize: healthy and happy kids.

remembering to bring my camera everywhere.

hoping for more hours in the day.

dreaming of everything being done. if only for an hour or two!

waiting for nothing, anymore.

looking at many cookbooks and making a plan.

admiring the patience of those around me.

searching for tutors: math and chemistry.

editing blog articles. a ton of stuff rattling around my head.

taking my time to listen. and observe.

thanking those who’s kindness and generosity make my life possible.

Sigh.

I love, love, love all of the incredible inspiration that can be found here on the internet. You hear of so much badness online; it's nice to know that there's plenty of goodness to feed my need for smart inspiration. THIS is one of those.

How I labeled my petals: I read the article, I grabbed a post-it note and sometime between delivering one child to rugby training and another to singing lessons, I took 2 minutes and wrote down my words. I appreciate that in addition to the project, HMK asked a number of thought provoking questions:

PART ONE

What was the first petal you named? Why did it come to you so easily (perhaps this is something you self consciously need to focus on the most)?

CONNECTION. It is the one thing I know for sure I have to do to grow as a person moving forward in my new life. Previously, I spent a lot of time avoiding contact with people out of fear. Judgement and ridicule was the order of my days for so long. My social self-confidence hit its nadir sometime last spring and it's been a continuous effort to climb up and gain my equilibrium. This has been a wonderful journey and one I must continue.

What was the last petal you named? It is something you are avoiding? Something you don’t give enough thought to?

LEARN was the last petal named. Certainly nothing I'm avoiding but an element of my life that has become habit. It comes so naturally I forget about it! I'm on a constant quest to challenge myself and to understand more. I love the process of learning and seek to nurture my curiosity in all situations. 

Did any petal surprise you?  If so, why?

LISTEN & OBSERVE. I really have to do this more and though I've been considering some tools to assist me in being a more active listener and observer, I was surprised it has become (clearly) top-of-mind important. 

Did any petal make you feel guilty? If so, why?

No. I've changed my attitude over the last couple of years and guilt no longer plays a part in any aspect of my life. I've purged a lot of bad things: guilt, shame, judgement and replaced them with good things: encouragement, kindness and patience. (Let's be clear: the good things are HARD work, daily, but so worth it. Negative is such a spirit-suck. Positive is a spirit-fill.) 

What order would you put your petals in, as far as importance to you and your well being?

I don't know that I would order them in any particular way. Each petal represents something important to my well being and can change in order of importance - daily! 

Any petals you wish you could change now? Explain.

I wish I could add more petals!

How do your petals tell your story?

I love that the petals are a reflection of where I am headed. I've let go of those things I cannot change and have shifted my focus onto those things that are worthy in my life. The petals really do represent a new chapter - while still holding onto lessons learned.

Which petal do you wish you could pluck off?

None. All petals are worthy.

PART TWO

For each petal…

• What are your thoughts when reading what you wrote?
• List three things that elaborate on each petal
• Now write one sentence for each list item (this is a good way to jumpstart journaling) Note: I'll be doing this in another forum - in my journal :) 

CONNECTION: foster more & deeper CONNECTION to family, friends and potential

This is definitely something I'm enjoying and want to take more risks and open myself to further opportunities to meet and connect with people

1. Lunches and conversations with friends
2. Phone calls (not just e-mail and BBMs) with family
3. Encouraging connections between my kids.

HEALTH: MY HEALTH is a priority with MOVEMENT and NUTRITION key

No more messing around, this has to become my priority #1

1. MMEW has been a wonderful way to marry my actions with accountability in a creative and meaningful way.
2. My thyroid really needs to be checked again. I can tell the dosage is off.
3. I just joined our local YMCA - now I have to WALK OVER THERE and move more!

OPEN: - ideas - people - opportunity

My One Little Word for 2012 and I look forward to see where it takes me

1. Ideas
2. People
3. Opportunity

STORIES: with authenticity tell STORIES and take supporting photos & art

I am finding my voice and it is really wonderful. I was getting there, but Project Life has really put me in the right "head space" to make this work.

1. Take more photos
2. Define and refine creative process to make the telling of stories easier
3. Improve forum and find one that is more representative of where I am now

KIDS: LIGHT OF MY LIFE

Everything I do is for my kids. For the foreseeable future they are the ONLY priority. I no longer resent their demands on my time or consider them anything but a joy. I've genuinely embraced that I can have it all - just not all at one time :)

1. Encouragement
2. Patience
3. Reasonable expectation

ORDER: Embrace ORDER with no apology. Take control. Do not settle anymore.

I thrive in order and control. I know, it's a bit of an oxymoron because creative types are supposed to thrive in chaos and crazy. Aren't they?

1. Get the house together, finally
2. Keep writing those lists and scratching off the things to do
3. "Do not settle" is key

YES: Say YES to chances EVERY DAY

I found the phrase "say yes to opportunities, say no to obstacles" isn't that brilliant? Thanks to Jenny for her wisdom.

1. Continue to say yes to the kids and give them (safe) opportunities to make mistakes - after all, it's the only way for them to learn judgement and their own boundaries
2. Go to that lunch, go to that dinner, go to that party, go to that show, go to that XYZ. Say yes to whatever it is, with no pre-judgement, and go, enjoy.
3. Embrace opportunities to grow as a person and as a mum

LISTEN & OBSERVE: More LISTEN & OBSERVE More

I really just have to shut up. When I'm nervous I talk, a lot. With confidence will come silence. I hope!

1. Breathe.
2. Look for the beauty in all things
3. Continue to say only kind things, or say nothing at all

LEARN: new things

Curiosity is a character trait that was considered unacceptable when I was growing up - it was considered rude. Only recently have I learned that it is quite the opposite.

1. Ask questions and show interest
2. Don't just collect information and books - read, follow up, engage
3. Engage in the hard stuff, things that challenge

PART THREE

Try and do the exercise again in a month or two and see the difference in where you are then.

THIS is something I should do - and perhaps maybe that is the missing petal: REFLECTION. Or maybe COURAGE or BOLD or KIND or FULFILLED or OUT LOUD or FIERCE or LAUGH or ENGAGE or INCLUSIVE or FINISH (or, start AND FINISH).

I really do need a bigger flower :)

What about you? What would you name your petals?

I was commenting on my friend Katrina's blog yesterday "I finished my pages today and cried. THIS is the type of album I want to make. All the stuff that fits and doesn't quite fit. The mess of it all makes it perfect." I am also really surprised, since I'm not a fan of messy or cluttered, that this feels so right. So happy I started!

LEFT SIDE:

INSERTS (6" x 12" and 8.5" x 11"):

Template: CZ Weekly Wrap Ups Vol. 01

12 of 12 page based on this post.

RIGHT SIDE:

And with that, Week 2 has been completed. I'm now taking photos and recording stories for Week 3 and coming up with oodles of ideas for other projects. It's amazing how just a bit of creativity can spark a whole lot of creativity with just a little thought and bit of effort.

I'm still developing a process that works. A few tweaks and I'll be able to share.

How are you coming with your Project Life? Are you participating? Are you not? Let me know :)

hello january 16. i do not believe you to be blue.

hello sick boy. poor thing. sleep and juice and time.

hello golden globes. where glamour and inappropriate meet. love, love, love.

hello lists. the joy is in scratching items off.

hello snow. goodbye.

hello cranky. holy smokes, children. relax!

hello touch rugby. so happy 3/4 want to play.

hello recipe exchange. some great ideas coming in. yay!

hello sherway gardens. i'd forgotten. we'll be back.

hello google calendar. you make apples talk to blackberries. i weep with joy.

hello republic of doyle. who knew? oh yeah, cole did!

hello monday. you are my most favourite day of the week.
i love that you provide me with 52 fresh starts every year.

what are you saying hello to on this brand new monday?
head on over to lisa's blog and link up in the comments.

01. Getting ready for school - Cole was still looking a bit startled to be awake.

02. On the other hand, the girl is all set and ready to go.

03. The kids laugh that we live "in a bubble". It can be snowy and cold in all the surrounding communities, but here it was +7C and raining on our drive to school.

04. Three delivered and one to pick up. Caden's hockey equipment was still not on his "tree" so it had to be done before we ran our before-school errand.

05. We headed over to the YMCA and got memberships for me and my boy.

06. Once he was dropped at school and I handled some correspondence it was off to the College Shop. I was Day Chair for a friend. Lovely group of ladies on Thursday! Nice to get to know them.

07. It was so nice to hang out with Lisa and get a massage - a bit too short, but a half hour is better than nothing!

08. A quick trip to pick up Caden from school and back to the chiropractor's office to meet the new doctor, Stefan. He's lovely and really knows what he's doing. Caden was happy, all thumbs up, with his adjustment.

09. Back to the school to pick up the rest of the troops.

10. Claire is the best sous chef - she put together the salad for dinner for me.

11. My list for today. I actually managed to get a ton scratched off - the best kind of list! Looks like there is still plenty to do tomorrow.

12. I finished up my evening with a bit of handwashing pots and pans. I really don't like coming down to a full sink in the morning!

In reality it is perfect! It can be as big or as small as I choose for it to be.

I have a thing for "order" and "control". I know, surprised you, eh? The problem is that particular trait often wars with my desire to be interesting and creative.

I'm planning (er, hoping?) that this project will help me keep control of our ephemera and photos as well as provide order in my story telling. Every once in awhile - STOP, who am I kidding? - ALWAYS, our life is going at such a break-neck pace I'm hoping it will help me easily recognize the flow of our lives, identify routine stories and the extraordinary stories, and all of the stories in between. I love how the ladies on the creative team are so very different and how they've approached the project to work best in their lives.

This is something I can do.

I'm happy to know I can have order and control and be interesting and creative. All in one box :)

Okay.

So, I've finished my first week and I'm pleased (can you tell?) with how things are going:

LEFT SIDE

INSERT (6"x12")

RIGHT SIDE

Now, I have to admit apologise for my photos. In this new house I have yet to find a good place to take a glare-free photo. Not as easy as one might think! Bare with me, it will get better over time, I hope.

Oh, and a quick shout out to Marcy Penner who posted these wonderful printables which greatly helped me, the spacially unaware, figure out how I wanted to organize my first pages. I know these will come in handy for future weeks!

Remember thosearticles I've been reading? Well this one has me convinced to write a letter to my children each week, or, as is the case this week, a quick list of observations:

And, over here? I love the idea of taking a photo of all four of my kids - together - once a week. This is our first installment:

Yes! Got them! With eyes rolling, all four have agreed to pose for one photo a week - together - for 52 weeks. I was brutally honest with the ENORMITY of their commitment and they've decided it's not a fight worth having. Yay!

With all of that, I have to caution myself to pace myself. I don't want to set some crazy precedence nor do I want to have multiple albums by the end of the year. This, for me, is to be simple and do-able.

As I promised myself at the outset, I've included a couple of inserts. This week these are inspirational things I've found on-line over the last little while. There has been an EXPLOSION of ideas and I wanted to narrow it down to two things that resonated with me, now.

Over on Be More With Less, Courtney Carver posted "How to Make a Love List" and it really appealed to me. As much as my Project Life is about my kids and our life here and now, it's also about me. I want to include some snippets of things that interest me within the book. In this case, I quickly printed out my own Love List on a 6"x12" insert:

and while I was cleaning out my computer I came across a Steve Jobs quote printable - I can't attribute it because I have no idea where I found it (probably life pre-Pinterest) - I didn't want it "lost" in the computer, and it's so brilliant, I had to include it. With my kids being teenagers and well-on-their-way to their own lives THIS is the message I want them go get:

Smart, eh?

Yeah, the quote and the project.