Friday

• Everyone gets in to SB at their leisure; and by leisure, I mean as fast as fucking possible. We take over downtown Santa Barbara, particularly the area in and around Old Kings Road. I have heard rumblings about folks going in on hotel rooms. If possible, I recommend everyone stay in the same hotel so we're not stationed all over town.

Saturday

• We will have breakfast/meeting at 10am in the IFS Banquet Room located within the Goleta IHOP (* future order of business: get the fine folks at IHOP to re-name the big room the "IFS Banquet Room" *).

• Last year, only MOM and A&D participated in what was intended to be a group activity at Hillside House, and as per the suggestion of several Ministers, we're going to go for it once again. So after meeting, we'll all gather at Hillside House for an hour of activities (painting, singing, poker, etc).

• At which point we will undergo a first for IFS:

Flapjack Bowl '09.

This football game made up of IFS members and guest members will be led by a couple of designers: Interior Design and Art and Design (QB's). The draft will be conducted while at IHOP. First pick will be determined by which of the two Captains has a bigger dick... hard dick. In the event that one of the Captains cannot perform or is unwilling to participate in said contest, first pick will go to the Captain who can consume a short stack in the shortest amount of time. The football game will be played out at a still to be determined location. Though at this time no prize has been determined for the winning team, suggestions are encouraged.

• After we have sweated out the morning's alcohol, we will retire to the Mesa House/hotel rooms and get ourselves cleaned up and dressed to the nines (this means suits). Once the Minister of Wardrobe has determined that we all look badass enough, we will all gather for dinner in downtown SB. Last year, we had dinner at El Paseo, which is very accommodating when it comes to groups as large as ours. We should make the reservations relatively soon given our sheer size, so if you have other ideas, please share. Otherwise I'll go ahead and book us for El Paseo.

• Already downtown, we then turn to dust. Let the winds blow where they may.

Sunday

• As of late, the morning after has served as a vehicle to get the fuck out of Dodge and an opportunity to begin praying for forgiveness for the previous night's sins. Instead, we will all head to Cold Spring Tavern for their weekly tri-tip sandwich Sunday. Drink, don't drink... whatever. Instead of bailing town right away, just stick around and eat a goddamn sandwich with everyone, will ya??

And there you have it. For the most part, the Quinquennium is set and ready to go. The only things left to set in stone are hotel coordination, football area and dinner reservation.

As far as $$$, there is little more than breakfast, dinner, bar tabs and, if you choose, hotel to consider. Spend like Baez or spend like Nova... you know the drill.

On another note. Besides looking at grad school admissions and doing some work today at home, I had the History channel on all day..."Battle 360" is one hell'uva program. God Bless America on this Veterans Day.

MoW

I am greatly saddened to have to miss both the Halloween Rumble and the upcoming 5 year reunion. My distance has proven to be a formidable obstacle to my active participation in IFS activities since school has begun. But I would like to take this seemingly lamentable situation and use it to the benefit of our entire organization. What I am suggesting will be demanding of you all, but the rewards will far out way the costs... I, the Rabbi of leisure, would like to invite you all to Durham, North Carolina, for the greatest New-Year's celebration of the decade!!! IFS New-Year's 2010 has the potential to blow your flap-staken' minds and stir your syrup-pumpin hearts.

For those bold enough to make the journey, I guarantee:

• Life altering Barbecue (and many other varieties of food to clog the arteries but quicken the spirit)

➢ Diego- This means all you can eat, so get your shwammy-as-she-goes ass down here

• Beer that flows like wine (and for that matter, wine that flows like wine as well)

➢ If anyone can convince Jordan to come, the Mike's Hards are on me all trip

•Scantily clad, sex-starved women, eager to experience the joy of uninhibited flap-jackery

➢ For Jimmy - Fish to have sex with

• Music so riveting as to inspire Bunch to dance, and make Nova want to sodomize Esteban

• A whirlwind tour of one of the south's most vibrant cities (led by your own Rabbi of leisure)

• And most importantly a chance for our brotherhood to strengthen bonds friendship in yet another far-flung destination

Let me know how this sounds to all of you. If there is a will there is a pancake, so let's do it!

Light and fluffily yours,

The Rabbi of Leisure

Townies Don't Surf from benpersons on Vimeo.

                        and so will some of my friends, like Rowdy,

                                                       Nature Boy,

                                            and the Ultimate Warrior,

Heard the Iron Shiek is coming too, that's good, 'cause I'm gonna' stick my 2x4 straight up his sandy ass,

Here's the WRESTLEMANIA address:

Jake the Snake's House

2039 President Place

Costa Mesa, CA 92627

Remeber to pay the Ultimate Warrior (he has a paypal account setup and won't let you in if you don't pay). See you there!

• Hacksaw

Had to share, now must go get some beer to satiate this thirst I got going. Can't wait for Halloween buddies. Bringin' rowdy heat.

As I told our beloved Minister of Rousing via G-chat last night, I am not going to be able to make party in the OC this year for Halloween this year. As much as I would love to appear as the Hulkster and beat down the Ultimate Warrior (by the way prawn, way to decide the group Halloween costume then take the coolest one...just kidding...love you), finances and school have become insurmountable obstacles to achieving this.

I love you all and "to all my little Hulkamaniacs, say your prayers, take your vitamins and you will never go wrong."

Should be a great Championship Series across the MLB with the Phillies and Dodgers competing in an exciting rematch of last year's NLCS. Overall, there are four great clubs in the post-season and looks to be one hell of a finish to a great season.

Any predictions for the World Series? Are the defending champs gonna make it back? Can the Yankees make it 27? Do the Halos have the magic of 2002? Is Doyers included in the Spanish dictionary?

Who: The International Flapjack Society, friends of IFS, and assorted gunt

What: IFS: WWF: Wrestlemania Costume Party...and Competition; best costume gets a HYOUUUGCHE Belt and pride and glory.

When: Halloween, Saturday, October 31st, nighttime

Where: Newport/Costa Mesa border, at the house of two IFS allies - Nephi and Sam (absolute praaahans), address soon to come - the house is perfect with a HYOUUUGCHE backyard.

Why: Because we can.

Participation in this event is already going strong. To keep those who don't respond to IFS emails because they are the opposite of strong, here is a list of 'who's who' for our upcoming WWF costume jam:

The Minister of R&S: The Ultimate Warrior

The Minister of Letters: Million Dollar Man Ted Dibiase

The Minister of M&T: Rowdy Roddy Piper

The Minister of MOM: The Rock

The Minister of History: Razor Ramon

The Minister of Rousing: John Cena

The Minister of ID: Ric "Nature Boy" Flair

The Minister of Comp: Hulk Hogan

The Minister of AP: Pending

The Minister of AD: Pending...The Undertaker?

The Minister of Health: Pending...Mankind? Sgt. Slaughter?

The Minister of Wardrobe: A wrestler...and not fucking Teen Wolf

Guest Member - Chuck: Andre the Giant

Guest Member - Ed: Irwin R. Schyster, I.R.S.

Guest Member - Sam: Jake the Snake

Guest Member - Nephi: One of the Island Boyz (tentative)

Guest Member - Mikey: Pending

Ok, that's what I have so far. If I made a mistake or missed someone, then please amend this post with a comment.

Next Steps: 1) Comment on this post or respond to the massive email chain with who you are going to be.

2) Invite girls to the event - this is key, because a group of guys dressed up as wrestlers and getting drunk together *without *a bunch of gunt around would be about as gay as a Teen Wolf costume. Girls and friends of IFS don't have to follow the Wrestlemania theme, though it is encouraged. If any of your girlfriends want to dress up as characters from Teen Wolf, that's ok.

3) Be ready to respond to a Paypal email that R&S will be sending out shortly - each Minister will be donating $20 to our Wrestlemania cause. This will cover booze and decorations (see step 4). The Paypal account will also ensure that someone (R&S) doesn't get fucked over with the bill.

4) We need decoration ideas - banners, posters, strobe lights...anything that will reinforce the WWF theme. Interior Design, this is your department, any ideas?

Ok, let's remember, the more the merrier, so let's brung heat.

That brings us to our next item, that is also fucking YOUUUUGCHE...

IFS: The Quinquennium Anniversary

5 Years. 19 Members. Dozens of M.O.M.s, dozens of C.B.s and handful of M.O.Y.s. Hershey, The River, Spring Training, Lake Tahoe. And now, back to where it all began.

This November, IFS turns 5. I've spoken with Letters about this, and we're of the opinion that for such a grand occasion, less might be more.

For now, we're thinking we start off with our typical Friday night invasion of State Street. Saturday morning, we feast. After breakfast we head over to the Hillside House with Letters, where he says that our presence (for an hour or two) will be greatly appreciated.

Next, we head back to the Mesa house where we setup for a late afternoon BBQ that slowly bleeds into a massive house party, to be accompanied by a surprise band...

Nice and simple. One thing that we need to discuss is a date. We can do this the weekend before Thanksgiving (Friday the 20th - Sunday the 22nd) or the weekend directly after Thanksgiving (Friday the 27th - Sunday the 29th).

Comment on this post with questions or suggestions. Let's make this first Quinquennium a strong one.

• Rousing

The recent earthquakes in West Java and Sumatra followed directly on the heels of ol' Glory and my path through surf paradise. Literally 4 days after A&D and I departed West Java a 7.0 earthquake rocking all the beach communities we were vacationing at. Our friends were all fine and no one was killed in Cimaja village where we were staying, however many perished in nearby communities. (Story)

I left for Padang, West Sumatra and our surf charter was based out of the regional capital which was just hit by a 7.6 earthquake killing an undetermined number of people. (Story) We left our Aussie boat captain, his Indonesian wife, daughter (6) and son (2) at a hotel approximately 2 weeks ago and have not heard anything about their well being.

The people of Indonesia are a warm and welcoming people. Almost everyone we met on our travels was stuck in one of the hardest hit zones of one of these two quakes and have been dealing with the aftermath every since. We literally dodged a bullet and I consider myself lucky.

Anyway, Indonesia is hit hard by these natural disasters on a frequent basis and it throws the country back from its progress into poverty and despair. The Muslim extremists thrive on the poverty and ignorance of the country's indigent. Indonesia is the worlds most populous Muslim nation and also serves as a model for moderate Muslims, despite fringe groups. But the world needs Indonesia to be a stable, democratic nation. They have a very pro-American president, SBY who is very popular. Anyway, these recent events touched me deeply and I felt compelled to donate to Surfaid, a non profit group which brings relief to these areas. If you want to toss a couple dollars toward the relief effort, please do. Thanks.

Donate Here