tag:typepad.com,2003:weblog-1256392 2009-01-01T17:40:47+01:00 Humorous, amusing and spoof articles based on unlikely news links and offbeat themes by the Nitehawk TypePad tag:typepad.com,2003:post-60666582 2009-01-01T17:40:47+01:00 2009-01-01T17:40:47+01:00

Firstly, let me wish you a Happy New Year. I haven’t posted for an exceptionally long time. So rather than give a reason, I thought I'd give a number of reasons, and let you select one yourself. So here we...

Nitehawk http://blog.offbeatchronicles.com/2009/01/reasons-why-i-havent-posted-offbeat-news-offbeat-humour.html tag:typepad.com,2003:post-53453056 2008-07-29T21:25:24+02:00 2008-07-29T21:25:24+02:00

Hi dudes and dudettes. Nitehawk is currently away on another trip to England, so there won’t be any new posts for a while (not that there have been any to speak of in the past few weeks). As I stated...

Nitehawk http://blog.offbeatchronicles.com/2008/07/off-to-england.html tag:typepad.com,2003:post-53089594 2008-07-22T23:56:48+02:00 2008-07-22T23:56:48+02:00

What Is A Friend? A friend sees all the good in you, and excuses all your faults, They may be many miles away, but you're always in their thoughts, Kind and supportive is what a friend can be, Like a...

Nitehawk http://blog.offbeatchronicles.com/2008/07/what-is-a-frien.html tag:typepad.com,2003:post-51374996 2008-06-16T01:35:30+02:00 2008-06-16T01:35:30+02:00

Nitehawk is currently away on a trip back to England, so there won’t be any new posts for a while. Please browse through the old posts, and don’t forget to visit the blogs I’ve got listed here for some great...

Nitehawk http://blog.offbeatchronicles.com/2008/06/off-to-england.html tag:typepad.com,2003:post-51235312 2008-06-12T11:29:41+02:00 2008-06-12T11:29:41+02:00

Alternative Title: Chip Off The Old Block Lego – do you know what I’m talking about? Those little plastic building blocks that you fit together to ……. well I’m not sure really. A couple of years ago when some friends...

Nitehawk http://blog.offbeatchronicles.com/2008/06/lego-in-the-new.html tag:typepad.com,2003:post-50652126 2008-05-31T19:44:42+02:00 2008-05-31T19:44:42+02:00

Alternative Title: What Goes In Has Gotta Come Out I started off earlier today in search of an idea for a post and eventually decided on a theme based on snakes. As I scratched around I came across a story...

Nitehawk http://blog.offbeatchronicles.com/2008/05/be-careful-what.html tag:typepad.com,2003:post-50350462 2008-05-24T17:48:31+02:00 2008-05-24T17:48:31+02:00

This question is the subject of news items every now and then, with some writers favouring men and others favouring women. As far as Australians are concerned, the jury is still out. At the Australian website MySmallBusiness, it is argued...

Nitehawk http://blog.offbeatchronicles.com/2008/05/who-work-harder.html tag:typepad.com,2003:post-50210108 2008-05-21T16:30:05+02:00 2008-05-21T16:30:05+02:00

Alternative Title: A Tale of Two Titties The Times Newspaper 11th April 1857 In a dawn operation, Her Majesty’s police constables entered a house of ill-repute in the Whitechapel district of London after interrogating a Mr. Charles Dickkens, who had...

Nitehawk http://blog.offbeatchronicles.com/2008/05/constables-raid.html tag:typepad.com,2003:post-49620430 2008-05-09T11:33:16+02:00 2008-05-09T11:33:16+02:00

If the recent news story about transvestites trying to blackmail footballer Ronaldo wasn't enough to give transvestites a bad image, the incredible story of a toddler being mugged by a transvestite has shocked the general public. Pensioner Doris Peabody, 76,...

Nitehawk http://blog.offbeatchronicles.com/2008/05/transvestite-mu.html tag:typepad.com,2003:post-49378822 2008-05-04T10:39:19+02:00 2008-05-04T10:39:19+02:00

Alternative Title: What a Strange Fruit Performer Wears Under Their Costume The Australian aerial performance arts group Strange Fruit recently gave a performance outside the Sydney Opera House. As the crowd waited in anticipation, the group mounted the seven-foot poles...

Nitehawk http://blog.offbeatchronicles.com/2008/05/strange-fruit-o.html tag:typepad.com,2003:post-49218454 2008-04-30T16:22:05+02:00 2008-04-30T16:22:05+02:00

After reports of the Polish clergy being warned that they could be thrown in the slammer for plagiarism, we have news that a chubby-chasing nun has been given a restraining order for harassing a compulsive Internet user. Sister Alopecia of...

Nitehawk http://blog.offbeatchronicles.com/2008/04/stalking-nun-ge.html tag:typepad.com,2003:post-48941920 2008-04-24T10:14:04+02:00 2008-04-24T10:14:04+02:00

It looks like some guys just don’t learn when it comes to military misdemeanours. An Israeli soldier has been sent to the slammer for uploading a photograph to Facebook. The guy is supposed to be serving in an elite INTELLIGENCE...

Nitehawk http://blog.offbeatchronicles.com/2008/04/chinese-soldier.html tag:typepad.com,2003:post-48803162 2008-04-21T22:28:58+02:00 2008-04-21T22:28:58+02:00

Earth Day will be soon be here, Poetry4kids assures me, Do your bit to save the world and revel in the glory. Plastic bags and lager cans, it's not just me to blame There are many other culprits. Yes, you...

Nitehawk http://blog.offbeatchronicles.com/2008/04/earth-day-offbe.html tag:typepad.com,2003:post-48672716 2008-04-18T23:53:00+02:00 2008-04-18T23:53:00+02:00

Catholic school teachers in the United States have further added to Pope Benedict's embarrassment. Arriving in the U.S. at Andrews Air Force Base, Pope Benedict XVI expressed his embarrassment and shame at the behaviour of some clergy with respect to...

Nitehawk http://blog.offbeatchronicles.com/2008/04/catholic-school.html tag:typepad.com,2003:post-48465174 2008-04-15T13:19:43+02:00 2008-04-15T13:19:43+02:00

Offbeat Chronicles can reveal that the man at the centre of the news last week for making requests for women’s knickers is back in trouble again, as a restraining order has been set against him by Judge G. Miles Overblaster....

Nitehawk http://blog.offbeatchronicles.com/2008/04/knickers-fiend.html tag:typepad.com,2003:post-48377418 2008-04-13T20:58:47+02:00 2008-04-13T20:58:47+02:00

I don’t pretend to be an expert on art, but as the saying goes ‘I know what I like’. Last Thursday a nude photo of French first lady Carla Bruni-Sarkozy, standing all schoolgirly coy (well, as coy as you can...

Nitehawk http://blog.offbeatchronicles.com/2008/04/big-sue-or-curv.html tag:typepad.com,2003:post-48278422 2008-04-10T23:22:57+02:00 2008-04-10T23:22:57+02:00

Spoof Alert! Yesterday we reported on Dutch hooligan Dirnt Giff van Dam who completely wiped out 4 years of work and the efforts of Dutch school children by driving a stolen motorcycle into a replica of a Viking ship. At...

Nitehawk http://blog.offbeatchronicles.com/2008/04/hooligan-traffi.html tag:typepad.com,2003:post-48225094 2008-04-09T23:18:35+02:00 2008-04-09T23:18:35+02:00

Alternative Title: Why Tell The Truth, When You Can Do A Spoof? It took 4 years to build and was constructed from 15 million ice-cream sticks. U.S.-born stuntman Robert McDonald had the help of his family and 5000 Dutch school...

Nitehawk http://blog.offbeatchronicles.com/2008/04/ice-cream-ship.html tag:typepad.com,2003:post-48169458 2008-04-08T23:30:18+02:00 2008-04-08T23:30:18+02:00

Alternative Title: Age Rage I recently had reason to take Funny Offbeat News to task about publicising pictures of my grandma, but that’s another story. The story here is of mistaken identity. In this case ….. well I won’t spoil...

Nitehawk http://blog.offbeatchronicles.com/2008/04/dont-mess-with.html tag:typepad.com,2003:post-48114624 2008-04-07T22:51:38+02:00 2008-04-07T22:51:38+02:00

Why Tell The Truth, When You Can Do A Spoof? While the debate goes on at USA Today about skinny models warping girls’ body image, one girl has piled on the pounds for her man. Two years ago biker Jenny...

Nitehawk http://blog.offbeatchronicles.com/2008/04/sumos-girlfrien.html