Also, I like to think big, thus, the need for The List. And I’m sure every, each one of you has it’s own. Call it as you wish, the Bucket List, the To Do list, it gathers all the small, big, crazy things you want to do before you hit the bucket. I am sharing mine and since it is an open list I will have a lot of later edits, adding things and hopefully checking some.

The List

• travel to all continents… well, except Antarctica and see as many places I can. On top of the list are Egypt, Maldives, Thailand,  France (Paris), Italy (Tuscany), Spain (Barcelona), Scotland and Ireland, LA, Miami, Las Vegas, NY. I have Greece, Germany, Italy, Czech Republic checked.

• go horse riding

• act

• buy a Mustang

• move to a big house, with big windows and a really big closet

• do charity every year

• have a surprise birthday party – not up to me, I know, but I never had one

• go on a trip with no predetermined destination

- the order is absolutely random

How does your list look like? This would be a fun tag-type kind of post but  since I’m not so much into the blogosphere thing, please go on and tag yourself. Link back to me so I can track you and read yours as well or leave a link to the comment section.

Some, make you happy for a day or less, others for a month, or a year and if you are really lucky you might just find what could make you happy for life. The most complex, long lasting and complete happiness comes with love. So if you find someone who can brighten your day, if you feel you want to make him/her happy because seeing a smile on their face will make you happy, well, needless to say that he/she’s a keeper.

For some, family comes first, for others, career or money, power or fame. But regardless of the source, it all comes down to this… H A P P I N E S S.

So my 2 questions for you would be:

1. On a scale from 1 to 10, how happy are you right now?
2. What makes you happy the most?

Later edit: Here’s something I stumbled upon today – “The purpose of our lives is to be happy” (Dalai Lama)
heh, great minds think alike : )

For example, I am sure you’ve met The Actor. Very talented guy, puts on impressive shows. For a moment there you actually believe everything he says is true. The stories seem so real, the interpretation so authentic. He deserves a round of applause for making you think you are the one in this perfect romantic scenario. In reality, nothing is further from the truth and that is just a role he plays. You (hopefully) wake up from this make-believe, distinguish fact from fiction and move on.

That’s when you meet The Politician. Smart guy. Presentable. Has his way with words. He tells you he likes to communicate, talks about transparency. You are finally happy you found someone who understands the importance of  good communication in a successful relationship. Then if you are smart you discover what he is all about,  how he manipulates the conversation and turns it in his advantage, how he tackles only subjects he feels he is in control of, how he avoids delicate questions and gives evasive answers. As I said, he would make a fine politician. But having this type of communication…you’re better off without it. It would only make you feel like you’re talking in vain and remain with all your questions unanswered. And besides, if he can’t be straight forward and opened about the things you ask him to, that should leave you a big question mark regarding the reason he avoids the truth.

You might have also come upon the IRS Agent. Not much to say about this one except that he takes a part of your revenue as if it’s his rightful claim. You start giving money, again and again until you get fed up and one day you decide you won’t open the door the next time he rings.

So you decide to try it out with someone different. How does a Rock Star sound? Great, huh? Hmm… not really! Yes, he is cool, looks hot, everyone is drawn to him like he’s some kind of magnet. But could you really stand someone that cocky, who acts like he’s above you and who’s ego takes all the room leaving you with 0?  Are you willing to always give in and ready for all the groupies around the corner?

You then go out with The Poet. Seems to nice to be true, he turns you into his muse, treats you like a princes, romantic is his middle name, his words are pure honey. He makes plans and the future sounds so good you could cry.Plans, after plans, after plans. Until you realize fantasying is the thing he does best. You discover he is too naive and sensitive, you want him more realistic and down to earth. Sure you like the romance and love to be treated like that but let’s face it, too much of anything will make you sick,  you can’t eat only honey, you must have some first course, second course, some good solid food that will make you appreciate the desert more.

The list can continue with the assistant, always ready to take orders, always your decision, the sales man, the detective, oh, and you don’t want to meet the boxer. You probably dated some, most certainly will cross roads with others. The question you have to ask yourself is: what do you want him to be, now, that he’s grown up?

1. Do everything you wish to do if it’s in your power to do it. Face the fears and insecurities, the vanity and pride and take a shot because otherwise, you will always ask yourself  “What if?”. I know I would rather regret the things that I did than the things I didn’t do. What about you?  As Mark Twain once said, “Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do.”  

2. Never say never! Old saying, I know, but utterly true. Don’t say or think “I would never do that” because you don’t know what life holds for you and maybe someday, the tray of events will push you to do things you couldn’t conceive.

3. Give people another chance if they didn’t mean you no harm. You have no guaranty that they will not fail you again but think how many times you wished you could have a second chance. If you can find it in yourself, give others another shot. It’s called forgiveness.

4. In life, the secret lies in the choices we make. They define us and make us who we are. So think about your latest decisions and actions and if you like the person you are becoming. Because it’s very important to be happy with yourself. If you don’t like yourself, nobody will.

5. Put family above anything else. Think how short life really is. Don’t wait to loose the ones you love and live with the regret that you didn’t do more. That you weren’t there more. So pick up the phone, call your father and see how he’s doing, visit your mother, hug her and kiss her dear, don’t miss the chance to tell your wife or husband how much you love her or him and try to show it everyday. How long has it been since you surprised your significant other? When was the last time you said “I love you?”

It’s hard to move from your old home to another, to change your neighborhood, your pain in the ass neighbors with possibly worse ones, the so familiar home-office, office-home drive and to pick a new store for your every day shopping, as good as the last one (close to home, good prices, dear old saleslady).
It’s hard enough when you have to change your job, it’s even harder getting hired for the first time and leaving behind college life.

Most of us, most of the times, prefer the familiar over the unfamiliar. Extending this supposition, is it possible this could go for relationships too? If you have been in a relationship for a considering long time, the thought of being single again might be scary. Especially when you don’t even remember how it was back then. For some committed people it seems like ages since they’ve been on the single market. The guys think they lost their flirting skills, the girls feel weird when they are invited on dates again…

But until you get to that point of being available again, you come back to reality. And it’s no maryland. It’s a 4 year old relationship or a 6 year old marriage that you consider ending. Could it be that one of the reasons we’re hesitating is because we are afraid, because deep down insight we are just cowards? We feel safe cause we are on a well-known territory but is that enough to settle for?

Sure, if you are used to doing things together, it’s hard to do them alone again. It’s always better to watch a movie or walk the dog together rather than by yourself. It’s nice to have somebody you can talk to about anything or if it’s 2 in the morning and you’re feeling sad, lonely or depressed, it’s good to know there’s someone there to pick up the phone.

Finally, it all comes down to decisions. Are you ready to go back from “we” to “I”? Are you prepared to start a new chapter? Are you up to let go of the “knew” and embrace the “new”?

In the end, there are 2 types of people. The ones who prefer simple calculations, with no X factors and the ones that aren’t afraid of equations because it’s always a challenge for them to find out what X (the unknown), equals with.

2. -He loves me!
-How can you tell?
-If he got through a whole day of shopping with me without backing out, he must love me. He eighter loves me or he wants to have sex with me really bad!

3. Love is the Michael Kors of fashion! Certainly, utterly, the best!

4. True love is like your shadow. You carry it with yourself until you are gone.

5. Love is like a bird locked into a cage too small for the bird to fit.

Tell me what you wear and I’ll tell you who you are

Yes… it also goes for your clothing choices.You can tell a lot about a person just by analyzing the way she or he dresses. I remember a quote by Melanie Griffith’s character from the movie Working Girl. Well, it’s actually Coco Chanel’s: ”Dress shabbily, they will notice the dress. Dress impeccably, they will notice the woman.”
So be careful what you choose from that closet of yours before you go out. And always, always ask yourself this: Do the clothes suit you? Do the clothes suit the occasion? Do the clothes suit each other?

…To sex or not to sex? When does the question pop into our head? Well, it usually does when you know that what you’re about to do is wrong (if everything would be ok you wouldn’t have any doubts). He is either your best friend’s man or maybe you have a man back home. Maybe both. That is 1 wrong + another wrong that equals a disaster.

There are, of course, other situations that force you to play in defense – like being a condom short. And you know what they say: better safe than sorry.

There are people who think that being a player is everything. But there are also people who don’t want to get back in the game. These are the ones who realize that winning is not about how many times you score, but knowing to quit after that one goal that makes all those years of playing worth it.

So that’s how you find yourself all dressed up, in front of a Martini glass or a Coke, checking your watch every 10 seconds. You scan every guy who enters, more and more convinced that this time it must be him. You smile, he smiles back but he passes right by you and stops 2 tables away where his friends are. Or even worse…you think he’s coming to you and just when you’re ready to introduce yourself – his girlfriend, right behind you : “Baby, you’re late!” If you think that’s funny…well…it is. But not if you’re the one wasting your time waiting for God knows who (cause you sure don’t).

So you take another sip… or two… and before you realize it, you finish your drink and order another one.

But no matter what, you must try to remain optimistic and smile to the cute guys in the room ( you’re feeling lucky today, right? ) but still… prepare for the worst ( you can always hide behind the menu if after taking one look at him you’d rather go home empty handed).

You keep lying to yourself that these are the last 10 minutes, or the last hand… but it’s not… Could it be that maybe we just don’t know how to loose?

45 minutes and 2 drinks later you decide it’s time to face the reality. You got stood up. He either didn’t show up or he took one look at you and ran for the hills.

End of the story: you loose your time… or your money and you ask yourself, why taking the chance in the first place? If we know the house always wins, why gamble?