If you’re new here, welcome to what has historically a blog from the late 90s and early 2000s that got increasingly inactive as life, family, kids and work took over. These will be here to stay, but as you all know, the past several years have also upended a lot of people’s lives – COVID, wars, and of course, AI.

I’ve spent the past several months quietly experimenting with AI. Not in a “disruption” kind of way. More in a “this is actually useful, let me figure out how” kind of way. I’ve developed apps and dashboards, reviewed my investment plans, adjusted my sourdough baking timings, and polished up the songs I wrote better than I could produce them myself.

I’m going to start sharing what I’ve been doing. Specifically the prompts, the workflows, and the results. Not as a tutorial, because I’m sure there are many experts out there who have done more advanced things. More as a log, for those curious to know what is possible. Everyday, more things become possible.

You’ll also notice the blog looks a little different. Nothing dramatic, just cleaner fonts, warmer colours, easier to read. The content is still the same, just as I am.

More soon.

VT.

RIP, Martin John Crossley Evans. You weren’t my warden during my three years in Bristol. But you were the warden of Manor Hall and a mentor to many who lived there, and didn’t live there. At least among the people I hung out with, if anyone referred to “Warden” we all knew that was you, not the wardens of other halls. Quite frankly, you are the only warden I would refer to with a capital ‘W’.

I was fortunate, during my last visit to Bristol in July 2008, to have bumped into you along Queens Road. I believe you popped out of the Whole Foods store, talking with someone else.

For a brief moment, I thought, “Should I even call out to him? I never stayed in Manor Hall.” But I remembered the profound respect you had commanded among many of us. So I called out, “Warden!”, and you stopped to have a brief chat with me.

I recall re-introducing myself, mentioning that I had not lived in your hall but in a neighbouring one, and that I had served for a term at the Malaysian-Singaporean Students’ Association, which you had guided. I also updated you about a mutual friend of ours who had become Catholic, and you had sounded pleased to hear about it. You indicated I was welcome to drop by anytime, although I wasn’t sure how often I could return to Bristol and whether I should be taking up more of your valuable time.

My key interactions with you were during my stint at the MSSA, circa 1998. We would sit in your office, which I recall was a decently large room with traditional furnishings. Once, you lit a pipe and sat beside the fireplace, pausing to reflect on the situation for a while. Looking at your side profile while you were in deep thought, I thought immediately of Sherlock Holmes.

I remember the time that most exco members met with you before the end of our term. I had asked you a specific question about whether someone had consulted you yet on a key matter, and you replied calmly and clearly, “No.” We knew that we had to expedite the matter. You did advise us further on what the proper procedures were but you never talked down to us. That was something I appreciated.

The second interaction was after I had ‘retired’ from my role, circa 1999, and had dropped by the Manor Hall kitchen to check in on my juniors after a massive nasi lemak cookout. Counterparts from the Chinese Society were helping with the cleanup. There was a mountain of dishes to wash and it was getting late. You appeared, rolled up your sleeves and started helping to wash the dishes!

You turned on the hot water tap and told us that using hot water would wash the dishes more quickly. Others around you were stunned and tried to stop you, but you continued washing dishes. Later on, observers criticised the committee for making the Warden do such work (it is so difficult to please everyone). But we couldn’t stop you!

So my experiences with you may be far fewer and shallower than the many who have lived in your hall, but I always remember your dignity and poise, your care and concern for every student who interacted with you, and your wisdom and humility. And I sometimes think of you when I wash the dishes. With hot water, of course.

Thank you for taking the time to be with us, Warden. You may have departed from this physical world but you have left a deep imprint on many students and alumni of the University of Bristol.

Some time in January 2019, I saw an ad for a new game called Star Trek Fleet Command. Being a Star Trek fan, and having played an earlier game called Star Trek Timelines, I decided to give it a try. It was my first real foray into a real-time, multiplayer game as I usually prefer going solo.

Having joined a deadbeat alliance, I found I was often talking to myself or getting monosyllabic answers from other players (presumably English wasn’t their first language). Worse, I would get raided as I didn’t have enough alliance credits to keep buying long shields. So I thought I would quit the game soon. Eventually, CEOPatrickstar, leader of Titans (one of the largest alliances) invited me to join him. Some time passed; I provided solutions during a small crisis and he announced that I would be his deputy. I was stunned but flattered.

And so I started to get more and more involved with this game – playing no longer just for myself but because I felt increasingly responsible for others. We had to manage internal issues like players gone rogue, wars and skirmishes with rival alliances, and then we merged with our biggest rival, Unity Collective, (which itself was the product of another merger). So I inadvertently ended up on the leadership team of what became the largest alliance on our small server, Titans Collective.

It’s been a heck of a ride with everyone. We’ve had our differences but we have either closed an eye or dealt with them. In the past 2+ years, our players have shared their real-life challenges like:

• Losing a spouse to cancer
• Surviving cancer themselves
• Coming out of real-life wars and suffering from PTSD
• Undergoing divorce or breaking up with their partners
• Having new babies
• Losing their jobs and closing down their companies
• Relocating to new countries.

We have been sounding boards for each other and have also celebrated our small joys together. I was proud to be the first F2P player to have built all three epic faction ships (the Enterprise, D4 and Augur) and still feel pretty good that they’re over 2m each. One week ago, I brokered peace between our alliance and the second largest alliance over a small dispute, which likely saved a lot of angst and repair bills for over 100 players. There have certainly been some good memories and online friendships made.

Recent incidents, however, are turning me off. A few days ago there was an ‘auction’ to win all the blueprints required to build the ISS Jellyfish, which is a game-changing ship for players who want to get through level 39 and beyond. My alliance was supporting me to win the next Jellyfish auction. Being a pure F2P player, I saved hard and spent some resources to get it – then found out there was a bug allowing other, bigger players who already had the Jellyfish to win it again. Many players commiserated with me and told me to try again in two weeks’ time, when the replacement auction event took place.

Last night, we learned of a server merge. We always knew we were on a pretty dead server and we had it easy for a while, with lots of mining nodes, a good chance to come in first on the leaderboard if you tried harder, with very well policed miner hits. We knew how chaotic other servers were, how their whales would make our whales look like minnows, and how some of their whales had made it to the exclusive USD25K club (only for players who had spent that much on the game each – which I think is absolutely crazy and a waste of good money especially when the world is fighting COVID at the moment). We knew our honeymoon was over. Our Discord chat was buzzing overnight with players asking what the next steps were.

I’ve been happy with how I’ve interacted with most players in my alliance and even across other alliances. How this game even taught me some leadership skills and deepened my cross-cultural understanding. We complained endlessly about the bugs (as they seemed to be never-ending) and the inconsistent customer service. We know this game is run by Ferengis (who are in turn driven by their venture capitalist owners) who want us to keep paying for more packs to keep up with the Joneses. And still we’ve tolerated the game and kept playing on, because the pluses still outweighed the minuses.

But starting all over again is not what I want in a game. I anticipate any of these happening a couple weeks down the road:

• Losing and having to rebuild our Territories, or not even being able to hold on to any Territories if we’re too weak
• From being the biggest alliance which always comes in first, to becoming a small alliance on the newly merged server
• Our whales may leave us for a bigger alliance
• Having to compete for limited spaces on mining nodes with 500 other players
• A much lower chance of coming in first on leaderboards (say goodbye to my chances of winning the Jelly auction…)
• Losing more ‘friends’ that I made in this alliance, as other smaller players will likely leave as well

Come on, you may think. That’s the fun of the game, starting over again. Well, I am happy with less demanding games that I can start and stop playing anytime. I am happy with games that don’t make me stay up late keeping an eye on my miners or the leaderboard, or playing aunt agony to players who have misunderstandings with each other. I don’t expect to be regarded well in a server filled with whales flying around in their Kelvins, because I don’t believe in levelling up quickly or paying money to advance, or even to participate in some events (which seems to be the direction Scopely is taking).

So, after 2.5 years, I may bid goodbye to STFC. Scopely won’t miss me, anyway. I never paid a cent for this game and am glad I never did.

– Commodore Vantan of Server 196, signing off.

PS. Star Trek fans will understand the significance of the title of this post.

Baby #2 was far more quiet and his general lack of activity got me a little worried. He turned out healthy but much more introverted. Baby #3 felt like she was somewhere in between in terms of movement, and so far, she has proven to be somewhere in between her brothers although a little more outgoing, like Baby #1.

Then, having learned about Meyers-Briggs types while at INSEAD, and being profiled again when going for coaching sessions, I decided to profile the various teams I managed to understand everyone’s working styles better. Then, after attending a parenting talk, my interest in Gary Chapman’s book was rekindled as well. What were our children’s preferences and love languages?

Baby #1, who is no longer a baby of course, seems to have Words of Appreciation as his love language. I can empathise – that was mine when young too, but I think over time I’ve simply come to not expect too much, and am happy to settle for people doing things for me and occasionally hanging out with me. And he’s looking like an ESxJ given his need for structure, wanting to know everything about everyone, and wanting to get things done. Aesthetics is also of great importance to him.

Baby #2 is quite the opposite. Possibly an IxTP as he loves to tinker with things and is far more interested in how they work than how they look. He’s oblivious about the names of some of his schoolmates. And quite clearly he loves Acts of Service. We changed our approach to him over the weekend, making sure we did everything he wanted us to do for him, and he has become even more affectionate towards us. If only we realised this earlier!

Baby #3 is only eight months old so it is too early to tell, but she seems to be happiest when she is with her immediate family. She has been displaying this happiness since she was only a few days old, when she was brought home from the hospital. Maybe I should read Love Languages for Children.

So, to whoever is left reading this blog: Do you ‘profile’ your kids as well, and has this improved your relationship? Leave a comment below.

I decided that before making any comments myself, I should watch it. In any case, I wanted to recognise the huge, calculated risk of fielding all Asians in a Hollywood movie by voting with my wallet. Even if it wasn’t perfectly authentic, it shows there is demand for more minority representation (from a Western perspective) and opens the doors for more of such creative efforts. 

So, the generally good and realistic stuff:

• Tight script. Didn’t feel anything was verbally out of place 
• Generally decent acting. From the trailers I felt the two leads were a bit stiff, but in the movie it didn’t seem so obvious 
• Rachel’s mum (Tan Kheng Hua) was pleasant to watch – no overacting this time, unlike in local comedy shows 
• Matriarch Eleanor Young (Michelle Yeoh) had the right mix of class and tradition while grappling with her own challenges as a daughter-in-law
• Peik Lin (Awkwafina). She rocks. Yes, she is a bit out of place in real life Singapore with her blaccent but everytime she appeared, she lit up the scene. My favourite part with her in it, is when she gets invited to the Young mansion
• I believe real uber rich people are capable of partying like what’s shown in the movie. And apart from the  Young mansion that was so huge it could only be in Malaysia, not Singapore, I have seen other homes that are big and Versace-like in Singapore. Like it or not, it’s how some of the 0.1% live.
• We are reminded that rich people also have their own problems, like having insecure, cheating spouses – not that we wish ill on anyone, especially the lovely Astrid, but it reminds us that everyone is human
• Hot bods – Nick (Henry Golding) and Michael (Pierre Png)
  
• I’m no mahjong player, but apparently that was a strategic game which mahjong players would appreciate. 
• It made me laugh and almost cry at the right moments. I liked how Rachel bounced back from adversity and showed she was above it all
• That RING. So precious… and to think it came from Michelle Yeoh
• By the end of the show, I really liked the two main characters and would like to see more of them (with Peik Lin, of course)

The weird stuff:

• We all know our grandparents speak more dialects while the younger generation speaks more Mandarin. So it was funny seeing Nick’s grandma speaking Mandarin (with a China accent, not a Singaporean one) while the younger generations spoke Cantonese
• The only Indians featuring in the movie are uncharacteristically fierce-looking Sikh guards who glance menacingly through the car windows. It provided for limited dramatic effect and felt a bit colonial. In real life, there are pretty wealthy Indians too and they would be invited to such parties in Singapore
• If Nick’s family really is old rich, they wouldn’t necessarily be so showy like the new rich – but then the show wouldn’t be as flamboyant
• There were way too many housemaids at Astrid’s place. I know it’s to show she’s from a very rich family, but it got me thinking, wow, how did they get so many permits from the Ministry of Manpower? It’s not like they have so many kids!
• Hot bod aside, Michael’s posh accent sounded stilted and distracted me. He could have stuck to his Singaporean accent
• Wye Mun Goh (Ken Jeong) is out of place here and I didn’t appreciate his cheap shot making fun of Chinese people’s accents
• I know I’m really harping on accents here… but just because you studied at a US or UK university doesn’t mean you only speak with a US or UK accent, which some characters did (I will stand corrected as I didn’t read the book and maybe some characters did spend a longer time abroad). Singaporeans who were raised in Singapore, studied abroad in their later years before returning home usually still speak with a Singaporean accent – perhaps with a twinge of the accent of the country they studied in. Having said that, I know other accents sound nicer and this movie has to appeal to an international audience. So I’ll hold my peace.

But that’s really nitpicking. I enjoyed the movie very much, it never had a dull moment and I would watch it again. And again. 

No show will be perfect and given what it stands for, we should give it our support so that there will be more movies like this. That will attract more talent from minority groups and maybe that will make future projects truly more representative. 

Today, my husband Ron chose a passage on how Jesus loves children, and read it to our younger son Paul. When he elaborated that this meant Jesus loved Paul, Paul repeated, “Jesus loves me??” And he looked so chuffed, he literally rolled over in bed smiling at this piece of news.

It was so cute and amazing that a 2.5 year old could understand this concept!

This was something I wanted to remember for a while and so I decided to post this on my blog. Yes, we will still have our ups and downs in life, but we mustn’t forget what He did for us.

For those of us who are Christian adults, I hope you enjoyed this story. Can we continue to capture the same childlike joy in our heart?

I’m not talking about sending massive email attachments that clog up your Inbox, although that’s at least better than getting nothing. It’s just that over time, that email disappears somewhere in your archives and you have to think, “Ah… who in that team sent me that Mother of an email? When was it?”

Instead, for important work projects we should be automatically clicking on an intranet page which has all the key content updated and appropriately filed. For events that occur again on a regular basis, we can always use previous documents as templates, and refer to the After Action Review to keep improving our work. And sharing info should be something easy to do, not requiring one to fill up numerous request forms and grapple with technobabble after that.

This pro-sharing mindset should extend beyond paid work, to the family home. Even if you have the info mapped into your head or your device, it’s good to list it down as others may not know it so well. How much do we pay per month for unavoidable things like utilities, the mortgage, groceries, the children’s school fees? Who are the people we need to call to fix things, like the plumber and electrician? When do the warranties expire? Who’s got all our insurance policy numbers and in case you become brain dead, do you wish to be resuscitated or not?

If we are so quick to share links or a funny or touching message with others, let’s commit some of this time to sharing things that matter more instead, to make work and family living a bit more organised.

And here ends my OCD rant

Hope this works and stays functional.