I just peeped your blog. Good ish. I’ve tried looking for blogs by Detroiters for a minute and always came up short. The handful I found were either defunct or left much to be desired.

egggggzactly.

Not necessarily. The side-smilers are kept in the contact book strictly for egotistical purposes. For me, at least. I don’t want anything physical or emotional out of them because I most likely already have in the past.

I understand your sentiment though. The need for a side-smiler is dumb anyway, but that’s just the way it goes for some.

oh, obviously if you click my link you see my blog is still there. lol. by ‘killed’ i just mean i stopped posting so frequently, took months off from posting at all, didn’t responding to comments, and stopped advertising and branding it into something big. in the world of blogging… that is homicide. lol

i can totally relate to VSB being your ego boost because at one point 07-08 my blog was crazy. and by crazy i mean a thousand hits a day, 20 comments within the first fifteen minutes of posting crazy. it’s great that people enjoy your wit and think you’re cool, but let me tell you… it REALLY created a problem in my former relationship. crazy considering he was the one who suggested i start a blog. after about 8 months or so though, he started to resent my blog and the attentions and emails i received from it and started calling it my ’side piece’ and actually thought i was cheating with these cyber men. just totally got out of hand…

so, i kinda killed the blog and now i look back at that situation with regret because i loved my blog and my readers, and it was def more of an insecurity issue with him than a real threat with me. oh well.

anyhoo… i think all men and women need validation, but there has to be a limit and i’d def not be okay with it being his ‘work wife’ or anyone he sees on a daily basis. relationships such as that are a slippery slope and i don’t want any chick thinking she has my man in any sort of way, real or imagined.

It is so voted.

I don’t get the woman who doesn’t stroke her man’s ego. I’m not talking about lying to him or blowing smoke up his bum, but true and sincere appreciation. For the little things that he does that make you love him.

It is hard out there for a black man. They get so much crap on a daily basis for nothing other than being black. They are so cliche that they don’t merit rehearsal here. These are multiple daily barbs that chink that armor that we so heavily rely on when we need a strong black man. Why wouldn’t you, as his woman, apply a healing salve of love to that armor? Whether its compliments or acts of kindness or just spendig time, our men need to be healed and validated on a regular basis.

I know that the black intelligensia don’t always put stock in theology. But this is my thinking. God himself demands daily (vocalized and obvious) adoration and love. Why wouldn’t the son of God, created in his image and after his likeness, need the same? I don’t know how this fits into today’s topic of mistresses, but that’s my two cents.

I’m about to check you out on Twitter.