They are being very firm about not liking the recent move. Maybe one of their favorite foods took a recipe turn for the worse, and they keep asking for the old food back. This new cat is horrible!

No matter what they want, we know there is no turning back, and we can’t provide that thing they want so much. Now what?

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We cannot convince our cat not to want the old thing. But we can convince our cat that the new thing is not so bad. We can help the new thing “grow on them.” How?

Sympathize. We can mourn with them that the old thing is gone.

This is very powerful stuff. As I explain about apologizing to cats, any time we are able to connect with our cat’s mental state, we strengthen the links between us.

When one of our cats’ favorite foods deteriorated to the point where we had to stop serving it, I would go through the baskets where the cans were kept, explaining that it just wasn’t there, showing them the contents. It was gone! They were reassured that I had at least tried, and this realization helped my cats adjust to new foods.

Empathize. When we show we understand our cat’s emotional state, we can use this power to help our cat understand our own. When we are happy and pleased and excited about something, we encourage our cat to feel the same way.

Often we don’t realize how much we are undermining ourselves by exhibiting distress over our cat’s unhappiness. This is sending the signal to our cat: You’re darn right there’s something to get upset about, I’m at my wit’s end.

If, instead, we radiate joy, we actually get our cat to wonder what angle they might be missing. They will then be more likely to look for this new, hidden, happy perspective on their situation.

Incentivize. Have we demonstrated every one of the new thing’s great qualities? If we don’t, we can’t blame our cat for not knowing they are there.

Point out that the new cat means extra treat time or play time. We did have to throw out that ratty old pillow, but the new one is so soft… and smells like catnip. What a nice window in the new place. Look, a squirrel!

Maximize. When our cats confront changing routines, they will need extra encouragement to see that this is an upgrade.

When our cat complains, what they want is reassurance.

Since our cat isn’t sure about this change, they will go to their default: caution. They want to be persuaded that things aren’t as bad as they seem. They want to be convinced that this new thing is really good, after all.

If we are there to tip the scales… we can.

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If they learn humanspeak it is because we are able to respond in ways our cats understand. What is the Rosetta Stone which lets these two species translate for each other?

That would be their body language.

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While all cats have this tendency, some really know how to bring the drama.

I think that’s great. There isn’t any wondering about this cat, is there? When what they are thinking is written all over their face?

One of Reverend Jim’s greatest challenges was that his face showed nothing of what he was thinking. Under stress, he would freeze. At any time, his face showed little expression; a sign of post-traumatic stress known as “blunted affect.”

We knew our rehabilitative efforts were paying off when we began seeing Reverend Jim’s thoughts appearing on his face. From his first happy ears, to the blissful face he got when nestled between us, RJ slowly learned to relax. Once he trusted us, and his environment, he could let his thoughts be written on his face and body.

On the considerable other hand, Tristan never needed any help whatsoever in the conveyance of his thoughts. From the way, at three weeks of age, he would thrust his face at Mr WayofCats to have the post-dinner glop cleaned off his chin, to yesterday’s (21 months old) trilling announcement of both his presence in the bedroom and his intended assault on the “cat’s bookcase,” there is never any question of where Tristan is, and where he stands on a subject.

Once we realize our cat is actually speaking to us; not just with their verbalizations, but with the even more nuanced and numerous ways their body speaks for them, we have an entire dictionary of catspeak to browse through.

The more confident, relaxed, and downright happy we can make our cat, the more their face and body can reflect their innermost thoughts.

This, in turn, can give us signals about how well we are doing in our care-taking. The more our cat trusts their environment, and the ones who provide it, the more they can dispense with the pretension that is prompted by their survival instincts. It can also be a test of how sturdy and reliable our communication channels are.

As we learn how to interpret the body language our cats use to display their moods and attitudes, the better we can fulfill their needs; and, in turn, display our own.

After all, every relationship is a two-way street.

For more about such body language concepts, see Communication Move: the William Shatner.

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One aspect of this that never ceases to amaze me is when I mention something I do for my cats… and someone else claims that, whatever it is, it is too much trouble to go to.

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I’ve lost track of the number of people who have exclaimed over their unexpected discovery that the cat was so interactive! so affectionate! so responsive!

Whether they were stepping in temporarily as a good deed, or had chosen a cat because of time and housing restraints, they were surprised and pleased to get far more from the experience than they expected. Most people come away from actual cat exposure with a new appreciation of how enjoyable cats are.

These are all people who are willing to give.

The choice of a dog as a pet comes with a lot of maintenance. But people feel the tradeoff is worth it because the emotional needs of dogs are so effortless. Even if they do everything wrong; the dog will still love them.

While cats are the opposite; they are so easy to care for, yet require a bit of expertise when it comes to unlocking their heart. Not that what their heart requires is difficult, at all. But that effort—any kind of effort—is what stymies the untutored. They are a victim of their misconceptions when it comes to pets and love.

This is expressed in the struggle between the concept of pet Ownership; and the opposing concept of Guardianship, which is how I see it. When we “own” something, we owe it nothing.

While if we are “guardians,” entrusted with something precious to be nurtured, we will have no problem at all in regarding our “ward” as a living being with needs we are privileged to provide.

When we think of our cats as our friends, our responsibility, and our delight; it is no trouble at all to create the little fusses they so much appreciate, and reciprocate.

So, is this an instance of cats actually obeying the laws of physics? No. I still say cats do not obey the laws of physics.

Because whatever we give to our cats; we get back that much more.

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I got it anyway; the prospect of a lot of Italian deli leftovers right before a weekend means easy meals.

Once I had bagged up all the goodies, I was left with the decorative kale leaves; and a deli container too big for my household to reuse.

Other people might see a large and awkward item to stuff into the recycling.

I see opportunity.

I am a definite fan of the cat affection move I call Confuse a Cat. When we give our cats puzzles to solve, we are meeting the urging of their instincts, which tells them they must figure out prey movements and create hunting strategies.

Giving our cats opportunities to fulfill the urgings of their instincts is one of the ways we can care for them.

I piled the kale into the clear lid, using it as a salad bowl. Then I made happy anticipatory noises in the kitchen, and ceremoniously presented it to the cats.

This, alone, was enough for almost an hour of exploration and speculation. If they nibbled the kale leaves, that wasn’t a problem either.

Once they started coming to me with faces which asked Is that all it does? I broke out stage II: the laser pointer. The laser light got broken up by the side patterns of the clear lid, making tiny patterned movements cats find irresistible.

Was there a third stage? Of course there was!

Then I sprinkled the kale leaves with cat treats; small enough to hide in the leaves.

There were enough nooks and crannies for three cats (James Bond tests my devotion by asking for his treats separately) to explore, capture, and enjoy their “prey.”

My cats are used to the concept of “hunting” for their treats, because I make it a point to put their treats in the puzzle box, mini-Kong, treat ball, or even the cardboard tube the paper towels come on.

This is especially important after using the laser toy, because while cats love its quick and unpredictable movements, there is no tactile feedback from “capturing” it. Because there is no capturing it.

So by focusing it on kale leaves where treats have been hidden, and then letting my cats enjoy the benefit of their hunting, I am fulfilling the need the laser toy excites, but cannot provide, on its own.

Then we all have a lovely morning.

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If I want it, it can’t be wrong.

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This isn’t because they are arrogant or selfish or stubborn. It is because they are solitary. In nature, there isn’t any such thing as “misbehavior.” In nature, cats know they can only rely on themselves… and what their instincts tell them to do.

There was a recent incident where RJ could not leave a window blind cord alone. I persisted in asking him not to… and he persisted in being driven back to playing with it again. He even got a pleading look on his face as I approached him; I can’t help it! I hafta!

So I took a similar cord, put a similar weight on the end of it, and hung it on the cat tree. Every time RJ played with the blind cord at the window, I took him to the cat tree and fussed over him playing with the one I had given him.

This worked because it let RJ work the instinct out of his system; this was an invading snake and it had to be dispatched. He could give the “snake” the beatdown without being interrupted; which was key to satisfying his survival instincts.

Once he had satisfied the itch in his brain, and had ignored both cords for a while, I took the play cord away. It’s been months and he still hasn’t touched the one at the window. It has lost its snakelike, dangerous qualities, and is just a blind cord again.

This is why cats persist. It seems stubborn because it is; but that is not all it is. They are not being defiant; they are being driven by a law of nature that is even higher than us.

The “new” blind cord is an example of redirection. RJ, once he noticed that cord was a snake, couldn’t forget about it. He had to act on what his instincts were telling him, even though on one level he knew it was just a blind cord, and on many levels he loves to be a “good boy” and not bother things he shouldn’t.

This is where the pleading looks came from. He didn’t need to be told, yet again, not to. He needed help in not wanting to anymore.

Our human brains work the same way. One we get to wondering about some bit of history or movie trivia, aren’t we driven to see what the Internet has to say? Once we have the thought about that tasty treat, that pair of shoes, that new gadget, don’t we pursue it? Once we have something bugging us, don’t we have to do something about it?

Our brains, human and feline, do this because that is the way they work. Neither of us are in the “original environment,” but that doesn’t matter. Following up on ideas and addressing issues are vitally important when such activities are how we will get our next meal. Or not.

So, even though both of us no longer need our brains to work that way… our brains work that way. This is why, when we ask our cats not to do something, they might struggle to figure out a different way to do it anyway.

We might think of this task as “making the cat stop doing that” but our cat always thinks they are “doing what I need to survive.”

That is why it is both so indelible; and, when properly handled, so easy to fix.

For more about cat negotiations, see When Cats are Lawyers.

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As their understanding increases, their ability to pounce on things decreases. In a properly managed home situation, where they are loved and celebrated for their wonderful, personal, qualities, they can slide into a kind of retirement based on past glory.

Even if we weren’t there for it.

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It might be an act of imagination to speculate on our cat’s past, as in the Tale of Banana the Cat, or it might be based on sad or happy clues we pick up from our cat’s behavior. Whether we’ve had them since a kitten, or not, we can always look for the kitten face that we know was once there.

Our senior cat, James Bond, is sixteen now. I did have him since he was a kitten, and it is only lately that his calm confidence has been shaken. He used to come to me with puzzlement in his eyes: What the heck happened?

Now, he’s simply resigned.

We have done all we can. We started a regular blood panel, so our vet can see if any parameters are moving out of their normal ranges. We added certain nutritional supplements to his diet, to make up for the decreased ability to digest his food. We make an appreciative fuss over the younger cats when they defer to James in some way; whether it’s letting him have exclusive time with the current toy, or first crack at the food bowl.

Make no mistake, James is still a figure of awe among the younger generation. Tristan took months to figure out the right way to show James affection because James’ incredible Presence enforced his wishes in the personal dignity arena. When Reverend Jim was a needy newcomer, James Bond was there for him. While Olwyn recognized his special qualities very early, and begged to be mentored by him.

James is an extraordinary cat, even though he’s not as there as he used to be. Now, Olwyn handles the day-to-day. Reverend Jim keeps tabs on the kitten, Tristan. I make sure he gets some feather time with the wand toy, while Mr WayofCats gives him exclusive cuddle time on the bed.

It’s sad, in a way, that James Bond is currently celebrated for what he has done in the past. But it’s also amazing, in any way, that James has done so much for all of us.

From getting me up in time for a vital college final, to raising three kittens able to carry on in the Grand Tradition of Awesome Companionship, James has left an indelible mark on our Cat Civilization.

That is what we revere him for, now and always.

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Since then, he’s disrupted our sleep for a few months, locked himself in the bathroom, proved he could open a child-proof pillbox, made us buy a cat tree, and persuaded me to swap out my bedside table for a more secure, and sturdy, furniture item.

He often behaves in ways we don’t understand until much later. He managed to kill my laptop with a glass of wine, despite all my precautions honed from years of computing with kittens.

And yet; I regret nothing.

Because that’s not all there is to Tristan. He brings this same intensity and commitment to the things we love about him, too.

Everyone in the house is his friend. Everyone who comes to the house is his friend. He had to learn that pizza delivery people won’t come in to the living room to admire his belly; he had to come out onto the stairs to be petted. Now he has new friends.

He is our constant companion no matter what we are doing, even if it’s the taxes. He helps with changing the sheets, putting away groceries, and assembling the cat tree.

Alphas retain their kitten qualities for a long time.

This has a downside, as we need to come up with ways of draining that abundant energy and satisfying that boundless curiosity.

But it also has a wonderful side, as in they are kittens for a long time. Once we understand that about Alphas, so much about them becomes clear.

Alphas are perpetual motion; those bright brains and busy bodies need stimulation always.

If we can give our Alphas enough interesting things to do, enough difficult things to climb, enough areas and beings to investigate and explore, our Alpha cats will be happy and delightful companions.

Perpetual clowns, quick to cuddle and just as quick to realize an urgent mission, Alpha cats are also poetry in motion.

There’s the fluid grace of their long, lean, bodies always looking for something to climb, something to chase, or something to manipulate with those clever, pointy, paws. These are the original issue; the Oriental line who were temple cats for the Egyptians, and continue in that line of work today.

From rodent catching to putting on shows, our Alphas are, in show biz terms, “always on.”

Then there’s the heart-swelling moments when all that focus and fierceness becomes about showing us love.

That is when we sigh, smile, and love them back.

Here’s some tips and tricks to help us keep up with our Alpha.

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In fact, such misbegotten efforts will usually make things worse, instead of better.

My new Chromebook has created a cascade of interesting behaviors in Reverend Jim and Tristan.

Because now-elderly James Bond spends a lot of time napping, and Olwyn’s heart belongs to Mr WayofCats, I am generally surrounded by my Laurel and Hardy comedy team of Tristan and RJ.

One heartening clue pointing to how far RJ has come from his deprived background is how he was the first cat to grasp what this “thing I was typing on” meant to our closeness. As I sat on the couch, he cuddled up against my hip, purring and reaching out a paw to rest on the edge of the Chromebook. I could almost hear him saying:

Ooooh, oooh. That “finger thing” you are always doing can be done on the couch, and I can sit next to you. Ooooh, oooh.

While RJ reveled in his fresh understanding of cause and effect, Tristan was noticing that when the Chromebook appeared, happy things happened.

He instantly picked up on RJ’s excitement, even though I don’t think he grasped its source. But if RJ communicates that this is a good thing, Tristan is ready to get on board. He, too, began curling up next to me, and placing a paw on the edge of the keyboard. He’d like to “play,” too.

Many times we might be noticing our cat’s excitement over a new object, and attribute it to our cat’s natural curiosity, or the interesting smells it might have. These are all factors, but we might not be realizing just how much our own interest in the object is the source of our cat’s interest, too.

Then there’s the other side of the coin: when our cats are reacting to something we don’t sense. This can lead us to wrong conclusions.

The other night Tristan, for the first time in many months, was rowdy far too early in the morning. He wouldn’t leave the contents of our bedroom wastebasket alone. We were both disbelieving and exasperated. Hadn’t he been so good for so long?

Yes, he had been. So when I got up (too early) and brewed my coffee and sat down with my newly-skinned Chromebook… I noticed Tristan was paying much more attention to it than he had before I had “skinned” it.

Both Tristan and RJ had paid a lot of attention to my new computer device; but in ways which celebrated our mutual enjoyment of where it turned up. This was an eye-rolling focus on what it smelled like; when our cats let their jaw hang open and they look brainless, it is because their Jacobson’s organ is doing the thinking.

It all became clear to me. When I had put the protective, and decorative, “skin” on my Chromebook, I had peeled off the clear plastic guides to proper placement and put them… in the bedroom wastebasket. Now, Tristan was similarly unable to leave my Chromebook alone; only in an entirely different way than before.

It was the scent of the new plastic that he couldn’t leave alone.

Sure enough, after letting my newly-skinned Chromebook sit on my desk at work all day, I came home with it and Tristan showed no more than his usual interest. I had taken out the bedroom trash before leaving for work, so Tristan could stop obsessing about the bedroom wastebasket. And, he had.

We could have been despairing that Tristan had, seemingly, forgotten all the good manners he had taken so long to learn. We could have been upset with him for playing with the trash, when he’d hadn’t done that in months. We could have been angry that no matter how hard we tried, we couldn’t seem to “train” him.

And when, in the course of sitting out, the stuff in the the bedroom trash became uninteresting again? We would have noticed that he “doesn’t bother the trash anymore,” but we would still be nervous, and suspicious of him, for seemingly, inexplicably, “forgetting” what we had asked him to do.

All of it would not be Tristan’s fault. He was only reacting, as a kitten and an Alpha and thus a noticer, to the heady scent of outgassing vinyl. There are many cats who seem to “go nuts” when their person gets a new shower curtain or raincoat; and then, just as suddenly and oddly, stop.

It’s always worthwhile to ask ourselves, “What is new?” when our cat acts in a way we cannot explain.

Chances are, that is all our cat is trying to tell us.

For more about cat misunderstandings, see my post, When they mean well.

I got this skin for my Chromebook: Mountain in the Clouds Decal Skin, but I had a hard time picking one, there were so many lovely choices.

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My cat’s eyes are two different colors! Is there something wrong with him?

Dear Readers,

No. This is just the cat doing some genetic magic.This is known as Odd-eyed cat. This is usually seen in a white cat.

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This is what happens with the amazing powers of the white spotting gene. If we have a tuxedo cat, or one with white socks or a white locket on their chest, we are seeing this gene operating in our cat.

Essentially this gene, WSG for short, AKA “white masking gene,” covers up whatever basic color our cat was destined to have, there. This is how we wind up with black and white, and tabby and white, and calico with white patches; all following the rules of melanin distribution from when they were an embryo.

What are these “rules”? The genetics of our cat’s coat color begin at the very beginning; and work outward from their spine. That is why we don’t ever run across a cat with a white stripe down their spine; this is the place where the melanocytes (color producing cells) are at their strongest.

But as they spread outward, to the cat’s most outlying body areas, they “run out.” So we have cats with socks and lockets and bibs. This is where the color ran out, and they got white fur instead.

If their eyes are where the color ran out, they get the “baby default” color, which is blue.

All cats are born with blue eyes. It is one of the ways of gauging a baby cat’s age. Tristan arrived in my house with blue-blue eyes, even though they are now green. If our cat runs out of pigment before it reaches that eye, that eye will stay blue. If our cat runs out of pigment before it reaches that ear; they will be deaf in that ear.

Thus, the common phenomenon of blue-eyed deaf cats; or odd-eyed cats deaf on the blue-eyed side.

So if this creates a less optimal cat, how did it become a part of the cat’s genetic heritage? And it does create a less optimal cat; blue eyes, such as are common in Siamese, don’t see as well in the dark due to a reduced tapetum, which reflects dim light back onto the retina for enhanced nocturnal hunting prowess.

How did this happen?

No one knows; but my own theory is that white coats are linked with affectionate abilities in the cats who have them.

We love cats with socks, and cats with bibs, and cats with lockets. Is it the humans who bestow more love on such “cute” cats, and thus reap more love in return? Or are such white-masked cats actually more affectionate, and thus need their fine-honed survival instincts… less?

Science does not, as yet, have a definitive answer.

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Great mousers, super-social, and able to take almost anything in stride, Beta cats fit everywhere.

As a Beta, RJ looks to his humans for getting his needs met. Because his early experiences consisted of not getting his needs met, RJ is always thrilled when an enjoyable chain of events is started.

While we used it as a training tool to help RJ over his deprivation, the act of creating, influencing, and participating in a Chain of Events is a source of joy for any Beta cat.

Most love the role I call Supervisor, since they are the most likely cat to appear and watch what we, or anyone else, is doing.

From daily window patrol to the weekly recycling sort, our Betas are always monitoring the activity of others in their sphere. They don’t just watch, either. Most display a clear interest in, and a talent for, organization, management, and motivation.

It doesn’t matter to our Betas whether they actually set the Chain of Events in motion, or just go along for the ride. Being a part of the Chain is what they crave.

It took a while for us to show RJ how his actions impacted the world around him.

Now, he is alert to the signs that something enjoyable is about to take place, and quivers with eagerness while he waits for his turn in the process.

Turning out the lights beside our bed signals him it’s time to snuggle between us and recharge his love batteries. My morning coffee ritual means I get out the wand toy and wear everyone out with some play.

It doesn’t mean Betas need an unvarying routine, either. A new routine can be exciting and interesting and a challenge; once a trusted human presents it that way.

One of their best qualities is their calm reaction, and considered evaluation, of most events in their lives.

Given a social setting where they are enjoyed and celebrated for themselves, it doesn’t matter if the other beings are human or canine or feline. A mix of any of them suits a Beta; they just want a circle of companionship.

This is where people go wrong the most with Betas. While many potential Cat Appreciators stumble at deepening the relationship, unaware of the concept of cat poker, this kind of neglect strikes at the core of a Beta’s abilities.

They expect to make their rounds, touching on each life which needs their Paw of Compassion, squaring up askew corners in How Things Work. They see themselves as part of a crew. More than other cat types, they need to know that they are helping, keeping the lines tight and the sails full, on the whole ship.

It can be a family with kids and a dog. It can be a multiple cat home. It can be one person who is home enough of the time. It can be any combination of lives which need Supervising.

We need to give Betas a team.

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