Whimsicality

Here I Am...Hear Me

noreply@blogger.com (Whimsy4) — Wed, 29 Dec 2010 19:46:00 +0000

I am sitting here at the computer listening to my children watch a movie together. The baby (who's 11) talks non-stop. She talks to the movie, at the movie, about the movie. She descirbes what she is seeing, yells at the characters, asks questions about what is going to happen next and parrots the parts she likes. Her sister is 15 years older, and is trying to spend quality time with the Baby, but may have to re-watch the movie later alone since she doesn't feel that she has truly seen it.

I just got off the phone with the Brown-eyed Handsome Man, who is frustrated with me because I don't talk much. I know I don't, but I used to. I used to get into trouble in public school for talking too much and not paying enough attention. In junior high we learned sign language so we could "talk" in class without getting into trouble. Still got into trouble, though. It is hard to play the flute and fingerspell at the same time. So when did I become mute?

Throughout my marriage when I would try to communicate with my husband he would cut me off. I would be talking, words were coming out of my mouth, I was mid-sentence, mid-thought and then he would cut me off. At first I would let him say whatever was so important he had to tell me right away, and then continue with what I had been saying. But over time, I often found it not worth the effort of trying to remember what I had been saying, it wasn't that important anyway. For a little while I would get angry, tell him he had cut me off and of course he would apologize and then do it again. I guess I slowly began to believe that I didn't really have anything of value to say. So I stopped talking. For years he didn't even notice.

I can have a conversation, I reply to what you are saying, I think lots, journal daily, and now I even "BLOG". But speak, out loud. Not so much. What I have realized in writing this out though is that technology is killing the art of conversation. It is so much easier to send a text, write an email, instant message, private message and even blog without the interference of speaking to someone and them speaking back. Most people don't like to make a phone call anymore, because it is faster and easier to have a monologue and just get your message out.

I LOVE talking to the Brown-eyed Handsome Man. The sound of his voice melts me inside. I have saved voice-mail messages from him just so I can play them back over and over when I can't speak to him but need to hear his voice. He talks a lot and after so many years of separation, years of lost time, I just LOVE listening to him. But he wants me to talk too! Especially right now, because he is sick and is losing his voice, and his throat hurts. So I have to FIND my voice again. FIND my self again.

I wonder what I have to say.

~ Spicey

Friends by Choice

noreply@blogger.com (Whimsy4) — Mon, 27 Dec 2010 21:50:00 +0000

Bit of a holiday emotional hangover here...not quite back into the swing of things yet. The dogs ate the last butter tarts off the counter and I'm not sure if I should be angry or grateful. So. Many. Leftovers.

Greyhound did what Canada Post failed to do, so I got Grandma points for getting MisterMan and BabyKat's gifts to them in time, but lost Daughter points when Mum's gifts didn't arrive before the big day. She sounds like she had a wonderful time anyway, but we sure missed her.

A few weeks ago BabyKat expressed hurt that I'd spoken about her on this blog, but trying to figure out how much I'm supposed to censor monumental moments in my life has become exhuasting. Christmas Eve we learned on Facebook that she got engaged, she's VERY happy, and they want to mend the fences. I left a congrats message on behalf of our family and we all tried to ignore the suddenly larger elephant in the room. An extremely emotional phone conversation followed a few hours later, complete with apologies for how it was handled, and although I wish her nothing but true happiness our family is left more fractured than ever. Today I learned she's picked the venue in Ontario and they'll wed sometime in September 2012. Thanks, FB.

After years of losing the hide & peek battle, I finally managed to pull off a suprise gift for The Kitten! First time ever. Even more surprising, she likes the clothes I bought her!! She and Mancub worked really hard, going above and beyond to spoil me and show me their love in so many ways. I'm so grateful they both value the sibling bond they share. It's hard to say goodbye again, but reality calls and he's offered to take her to Ontario for spring break. They have so many old friends to spend time with and it's sure to be a memorable trip for both of them.

I'll be very glad for the end of 2010, letting the Baby New Year begin while I slumber. Deepest gratitude to the family for getting me through the roughest holiday season I've ever had. All the emotions prompted me to haul out this old list, The Adventures of Sweet & Tart, that I keep adding to every few years. It was last posted on October 16, 2006.


Sweet and Tart - 1971

"A sister is a gift to the heart, a friend to the spirit, a golden thread to the meaning of life." ~Isadora James

It's only fair to warn you. Today's post will probably make you feel like you have your nose pressed up against glass, watching a party you can't go to, trying to read the lips of people speaking a language you don't understand. I'm sorry. This one's important to me though, so better luck next time.

I have three sisters and two brothers, yet I was raised as an only child - trust me, you don't want to ask. I've been told I don't have a family tree; I have a family forest. As I watch my daughters growing up, I realize more and more how much I missed out on. Perhaps this is why I treasure family and the memories we make together so much.

Everything in our home is not all sweetness and light, however. Life with teenage daughters is not for the faint of heart. BabyKat & The Kitten were going at it again last night, their voices becoming more shrill, as each did her best to gutshot the other. I try not to interfere too much, in spite of the fact my heart is crying out, "You're sisters! It's a gift! Be nice to each other!!!"

I held my tongue, because even their arguments are a thread in the fabric of a relationship they alone share - that unique, intangible bond - and one day, they will look back at the memories and giggle.

At thanksgiving, my sister Sweet and I were able to add to the running list of memories we share. Every now and then I update it. It is all with the greatest of love and affection. Each time I haul them out, I remember how blessed I am to have her, this forever-friend to my spirit.

The Adventure Continues...You always stole my soother, you little biotch. Thanx a bunch for dropping me down the stairs. Rocky-rocky, baby. "Let's jump on Mum's bed!" (Yeah, that was a great idea.) Hide 'n seek until the streetlights came on. Waterfights. Luch chasing you through the neighbourhood. Dairy Queen. Ju Boobs. "Allan, if u throw her in the pool, I will NEVER speak to you again!" That was a looooong four years, but I 've got your back. Hermald from the CNE. "You traded your whole Shaun Cassidy collection for a picture of a dumb boy??" Woolco Grill + Strawberry Cheesecake + your friends = too cool. "Skip school with me, we'll go to the Eaton's Centre...oh shit, we don't have enough bus fare to get home." Supertramp concert. You driving beside me in the rain because you wouldn't let me get your car wet - that's really not nice. Pffffft.

Montreal trip...back seat of your Camaro. Cowboy hats. Kinky machine. Roller skates with fuzzy dice & a football shaped radio. Your first wedding was a blast...tall, blond & dumb are highly trainable. Oops...what was his name anyway?

Thank you for Motorman, Elvis, & LingLing. Dinner on the kitchen counter because someone bought a trainset. "Noisy toys, Auntie? Payback's a bitch." Devil'd eggs and Ninja Turtles. "Little sister, don't do what yer big sister done." Bienschtich. Tupperware. Packing a lunch that was eaten before coffee break. Aloette.

"My uncle's in there and she's gonna have a baby."

The uncertainty of moving to OV, but you stood by me through ALL THAT . Timmy's in the morning. Lasagna and Corning Ware in the front hall...kick they asses to the curb. The Shack. Rum balls. I hate Bingo. Two little girls trying cigarettes. Oshawa bars. You puked in my ex's car when I borrowed it: beyond cool. Tanning Dates. "Do you know where the L-Inn is?" Salt allergy. "She's very sports oriented...especially tonsil hockey." Box o’wine when you got to sleep and I had to work! "That's a thing of beauty." Potato salad. Come for coffee, stay for a month. ICQ & Quest. All the sleepovers. Our children scolding us: "Can you two keep it down, we're trying to sleep!" Schmenge. Camping.

Tubing: "Are you F***ING KIDDING ME?!"

"Umm...exactly how many knives do two teenage boys need to peel potatoes?" Three exhausted dogs. Ruthless Spoons. Wrinkle cream, indeed! Priceless prayers: "No fair!!!! She took the thing I was gonna say!" Yellow cats. Heart melting moments, as the next generation offers soulful thanks and builds new memories. I can't wait for Christmas.

Meeting the Brigade. "I don't know where I'm going but my sister told me I'll like it." Smokey BBQ. Moonshine. Hives. "What do you mean you don't know how to read a map?" Gas station with no toilet paper and free lapdances. Mountain folk and banjoes in the background. Virginia Beach, napping with the moonroof open, nuns on sabattical, photographic evidence of shore drowning, drink of the day, midnight swims, parasailing, liquid form of the four food groups and early morning photo ops.

We could live in BC, taking the leap; see you in six weeks, roomies again. Wedding Coach, new shoes, flowers, “I’m just sayin'!” auctions, freebies, contests, never, ever pay retail. Lists, lists and more lists, "Could you try to stay focused, please?" Make reservations for swag, lost in H&M, free hot dogs, blog lessons, import-export-import, Sunshine and the Dark Cloud. Flannel and hot flashes don’t mix, four exhausted dogs, perfect purses, calenders and shawls. Promise NO Pretendsies, Ever.

The road to my sister’s house is never far…

Heather's Perspective Giveaway Winners

noreply@blogger.com (Whimsy4) — Sun, 26 Dec 2010 17:07:00 +0000

Christmas is over for another year. Has everyone finished exhaling yet? Whether you're out in the madness seeking bargains, cleaning up after the party, or just kicking back and relaxing, I hope everyone has a wonderful Boxing Day.

Winning a giveaway should be a nice little end to 2010 for three of our readers. A HUGE thank you to Heather's Perspective for sponsoring this giveaway and to everyone who entered! The winners have been notified by Facebook, Twitter or email.

Deborah is winner of the first prize, four 8x10 prints and a four-card stationery set. Congrats!

Deborah

Shannon is winner of the second prize, an 8x10 print and a four-card stationery set. Congrats!

Shannon

An Anonymous reader at the email listed below is winner of the third prize, one four-piece stationery set plus another stationery set of your choice from Heather's Perspectives. Congrats!

plur268{AT]yahoo{DOT}com

Wishing You & Yours

noreply@blogger.com (Whimsy4) — Fri, 24 Dec 2010 20:48:00 +0000

Envy the Penguin

noreply@blogger.com (Whimsy4) — Wed, 22 Dec 2010 14:58:00 +0000

Hope everyone is on track with their holiday preparations. My absence has been all about the hard core stick to my absurd schedule, but it's done. My house is clean & ready, groceries are stocked up, there's a wee bit of wrapping left to do, packages have been shipped and it's time to relax and enjoy my family. Mancub and Pink Lady are enroute, The Kitten is having Vanny over to do some baking, and we'll keep it pretty low-key.

Ooh, guess what Tart gets for Christmas?

HOT FLASHES!!

And not the good kind.

Le Sigh. So this is menopause. So far...not loving it. Never mind the "Already? Wah, wah, I'm too young!" drama. I accept. If you've already been there, you know what I'm talking about...for those of you who have it in store...let me just say it's the weirdest feeling ever. I just want this over. NOW. Could someone put in a good word with Santa? I promise to never laugh at the little penguin again.

First person to complain it's too cold in the house is getting a Turkey Hat.

Yves Rocher Giveaway Winner

noreply@blogger.com (Whimsy4) — Wed, 22 Dec 2010 14:30:00 +0000

A huge thank you to Canadian Free Stuff for sponsoring our Yves Rocher Cosmetics giveaway and to all of you who entered, especially you faithful Tweeters! The winner has been notified by email. I hope you'll grab some good karma and join me in the comments to congratulate the winner, Jennifer C.

We still have one giveaway open for a few more days. There will be three winners and the entries are low. Be sure to check out the gorgeous photos and get details HERE.

Short & Sweet

noreply@blogger.com (Whimsy4) — Thu, 16 Dec 2010 17:42:00 +0000

"Short & Sweet" on Whimsicality Mama's Hideaway

I am a WITCH

noreply@blogger.com (Whimsy4) — Thu, 16 Dec 2010 17:38:00 +0000

I am not one to talk about religion, particularly my own, unless asked. Witches, Wiccans, Pagans, we believe very strongly but we don't recruit. We are not knocking on your door or harrassing you on street corners or looking for lonely college students to come join us. I do not hide my religion or beliefs, I feel a strong and powerful connection to the Goddess and wear my pentacle proudly. Those who have an idea of what it means will comment. Some who THINK they know will make stupid comments, like the guy who told me he has "dabbled" a bit himself. I DON'T dabble. I practice. I believe, but I don't dabble. We don't recruit, but if you ask, if you are truly interested, we will share.

Today I feel the need to share, to educate and to inform. The other day I read an article regarding the Salvation Army in Calgary REJECTING donations of toys that they say promotes black magic and the occult. Workers there have been instructed not to put any Harry Potter stuff or anything to do with vampires into the hampers. These are the items geared to older kids, the kids who often get forgotten about beyond pj's and socks. It makes me sad and angry that people have preconceived and incorrect notions regarding others beliefs and can't or won't take the time to expand their mind and learn just a little.

I realized I have been blessed with an opportunity to share and to educate. I am not trying to convert anyone, simply pass on some knowledge so that when your neighbour, friend or family member tells you they are a Witch, you won't be afraid or run screaming from the room. You will have some knowledge and maybe even feel comfortable enough to ask some questions.

First let me tell you how I got here. My mother is Catholic (non-practicing) and my father was a non-believer. When my parents married, a condition was agreed upon that any children would be raised Catholic. But I was baptized Anglican and we did not attend church regularly, though I did go to Sunday school for a short time and later Catechism classes. I have always believed. The problem was my beliefs didn't agree with my religion. I didn't grow up in a happy home. I had a father I was afriad of but did not respect, and I was deeply troubled by the notion of needing to be "god-fearing". Shouldn't the Father be respected AND respectful? Where is the love in fear? I knew from living it that there isn't any. I also was uncomfortable with the idea of woman as an afterthought. Man was created, he got lonely and so woman was created? Shouldn't woman be considered just as great as man? Two halves of the same whole. So where was the Goddess? Then there is the concept that God is out there, you can't see, touch, hear or experience the Divine. Just believe. But in my personal experience I always believed everything has Spirit. Just like in Pocahontas, "every rock, every tree, every creature has a Spirit, has a name" and we are all connected.

In my quest for a religion that fit me and my beliefs I kept returning to Wicca, over and over. I think I probably knew from about 10 years old I was a Witch, but kept trying to fit in to the cookie cutter that is so readily accepted by most. Wicca is the only western religion that has a Goddess and a God. Women are spirtitual leaders, priestesses, honoured and valued. Wicca is a religion of joy and love. We celebrate the changing seasons, the Earth and the Moon in all her glory. We do not try to repress ourselves, we value knowledge, we are each on our own personal path of self-exploration. We believe the Divine is within us as well as all around us. The power of love is magick. We believe in free will, which is what I have always taught my children. Every thing you do, every thing you think, every thing you say is a choice, from the moment you open your eyes in the morning until you drift off to sleep at the end of the day. There is no puppet master pulling your strings, there is only you. We don't believe in all good or all bad. We all have the capacity for good and bad every single day. It is your choice. Oh, and we don't believe in the devil or hell, those are Christian beliefs. Therefore we can't worship him.

We believe in taking responsibility for one's own actions. Because we are all connected, we believe that what we put out affects the world around us, so we tend to be environmentally conscious. A central tenet that unites all Wiccans is the Wiccan Rede, and the main point of that is "An it harm none, do thy will" which basically means if what you intend to do will harm none then go ahead. If we could all live by that philosophy think what a wonderful world this could be. We also believe that what you put out will come back threefold, or three times more. So if you are sending out good thoughts, good words, good actions, good intentions (we believe very strongly in intention, the thought behind the word, deed, action, spell, magick) the Universe will send that back to you threefold. But negative will attract negative. I love that each of us has the ability to be our own spiritual leader. Your place of worship is in your heart as much as it is the entire world around you. When you honour yourself, with good food, exercise and love, you honour the Goddess/God within you. Blessed Be.

Living the
Love and
Laughing....Spicy

Cute-Stuffs Giveaway Winners

noreply@blogger.com (Whimsy4) — Wed, 15 Dec 2010 12:04:00 +0000

the two winners are:

#9 - Shannon

#39 - Anonymous

Congratulations to both of you! I've sent you an email or Twitter. Please get in touch with CUTE-STUFFS to give them your shipping information and let them know which earbuds and phone charm you would like.

Thank you to everyone for entering the giveaway!! Remember, you still have plenty of chances to win some cute-stuffs of your own in their Kawaii Winter Giveaway on the new contest page. Good luck and Congrats to our winners.

~Whimsy4

Enough Lemons, Please

noreply@blogger.com (Whimsy4) — Tue, 14 Dec 2010 17:34:00 +0000

Glam Looks for the Holiday Season

noreply@blogger.com (Whimsy4) — Mon, 13 Dec 2010 22:31:00 +0000

You’ve been invited to some holiday parties, or a New Year’s Eve bash...ok,so you have an outfit that rocks, shoes with bling, and a hair style in mind.What shall a girl do to add pizzazz to the ensemble?? Ah yes,the makeup look that will be sure to turn a few heads. Firstly, here are a few things to avoid when planning your makeup look.

Matchy-matchy is Tacky: If you are wearing an outfit with a lot of bling or colour...avoid matching your makeup look to this outfit. Try a more neutral palette. Avoid the painted lady face.

There should be only one disco ball at the party: When wearing an outfit with plenty of glitter, sparkle and shine, avoid this on your face. If you desire a little shimmer, apply only to one area, either above cheek, on brow bone or inner eye area.

An Unbelievable Bronze: Stay away from bronzers that are reddish or orangey in colour, try a golden tone..stay away from applying this all-over face, neck and décolleté areas...instead only apply sparingly to forehead, nose, across the cheeks and chin...where the sun naturally touches the high points of your face. Then apply sparingly to décolleté areas and collar bone.

Avoid a heavy powdery look: If you plan on dancing the night up, you may find your face getting sweaty. Instead of applying more powder to your face,blot your face (do not rub) with blotting paper or Kleenex...applying more powder on top of sweat will only make the face appear blotchy and cakey. You could also not apply any moisturizer before doing your makeup.

Now that we have covered that, now we can talk....hot makeup looks right now!!

Dark Beauty : To avoid looking over done,experiment with one key feature. Dark Smokey eyes with a nude sculpted cheek bone and neutral lip. Lots of mascara, concentrating on the upper lashes and sweeping them outwards.

Red Hot Babe: Red lips are can look glam,sexy or elegant. Anyone can wear a red lip, yes it is true...blue based for porcelain with pink undertones or a warm orangey red for olive or light skin with yellow undertones. A deep purple red or brown based red will look best on darker skin.When wearing a red lip, keep the rest of your makeup look neutral, playing the eyes up with a black sweep of eye liner( a cat look) top lash line only...don’t apply any liner under eye...instead apply a nude shadow or golden tone under and very little mascara.

Makeup Artist Tips

Create a stain: Using 70% alcohol...dip a lip brush into water then into alcohol..dab this on top of your lipstick. It dries quickly...then re-apply your lipstick...this will feel a little tingly..but once dry you won’t feel it. It creates a stain and your lipstick will last 3 times as long.

*Note: This is not a for every day use,since it can dry out lips with a lot of use.*

Healthy glow on your body skin and don’t have a glow-lotion? It’s quite easy to make your own.Use your daily body lotion, apply about the size of 2 quarters into your palm, sprinkle a little shimmer powder, rub together in your hands and you have a glow-lotion...apply to shoulders, arms and décolleté. If you are wearing your hair up, apply to the back of your neck.

Sheer Foundation: Stop using your finger tips to apply liquid foundation. Invest in make up sponges or a foundation brush. If you would like a sheer dewy look to your face...spray your face with water first,this will help foundation glide on easier and dilute the formula.Giving you a smooth dewy look.

Just a little tid bit I would like to share with you. Some time ago a client of mine said to me before I started her makeup application, "I’m a mother, so I want to still look like a mother.”

...What does that mean?? You want to look like you always do, every day? I just don’t get this thinking at all, I mean ladies just because we are mothers, does that mean we can’t look sexy, glammed up or elegant??? Especially at this time of year! Should we wear a hat that says, “I’m a mom, excuse me for not looking Glam”...NOT!!

I am a mom first, but when I go to a party or out somewhere for the evening I will not be looking my every day self (whatever that is...I suppose casual.) I will brush my teeth, have a shower, style my hair, dress up in my stylish outfit; I will put on my best face, and best of all...I will feel beautiful!!

I hope you have enjoyed my first post. I look forward to many more and shortly I'll be posting my “New Years Beauty Resolutions.”. Until then,

Stay Beautiful...Sugar

Sugar Whimsicality

noreply@blogger.com (Whimsy4) — Mon, 13 Dec 2010 22:15:00 +0000

For a few weeks now, I’ve been promising to introduce you to our beauty expert, Sugar. The delay has been entirely due to my lacking as a writer. Her story is fascinating and defies being slotted into a six-sentence bio. Many of the elements that helped form her into the woman she is today might be shared at a later date and some might remain a mystery...but her words explain exactly why she's found a home on Whimsicality:

“There is an inner beauty about a woman who believes in herself, who knows she’s capable of anything that she puts her mind to. There is a beauty in the strength & determination of a woman that follows her own path, who isn't thrown off by obstacles along her way. There is a beauty about a woman whose confidence comes from experiences, who knows she can fall, pick herself up, and move on.”

Professional make-up artist and owner of Dreamscapes Makeup Art, Sugar is also part of the vital and stylish team at Salon Luxe in Newmarket, Ontario. In 2003, she launched her professional grade private cosmetic line, Paintz, which is used exclusively by a dozen professional makeup artists and many of her personal clients. She is a member of CNOMA and a true artist whose passion is unmistakable. To date, Sugar has received 14 prestigious awards for her work.

A graduate of Seneca College for Estethics, Sugar went on to graduate top of her class at SOMA - the #1 makeup artistry school in Canada at the time. As a Key Makeup Artist with Esprit Designs, she has traveled all over North America working many fashion runways, platforms, bridal showcases, bridal fashion shows, the Toronto Film Festival, and editorial work. Sugar's work has been seen in many publications over the years, including Canadian Brides, Canadian Living, Elle Canada, Elevate, Fashion, Flare, Modern Brides, More, Salon Magazine. Skin Inc., The Knot, and Wedding Bells. Her freelance work has provided the opportunity to showcase her art while creating the professional “dream look” for clients attending graduations, proms, weddings and other special occasions. As a certified instructor, she's taught at many colleges and private schools. Doing volunteer work for abused women and mentoring troubled teens is gratifying and gives Sugar the outlet to use her life experiences in a positive way.

A self-proclaimed proud military brat and patriot, Sugar was born in Germany and much to the surprise of her mother, unleashed a life-long love of horseback riding as a child in England before eventually settling in Ontario after her father retired. She’s a blissfully happy wife, proud mother of two beautiful daughters, and shares her heart with many close friends and two large and crazy dogs.

I’m looking forward to getting to know this fascinating part of our team better and encourage you to email any beauty questions you would like her to answer.

We're so very pleased to welcome you to Whimsicality, Sugar!

Monday Bits o'Whimsy

noreply@blogger.com (Whimsy4) — Mon, 13 Dec 2010 13:38:00 +0000

Good Monday morning! Hope everyone is coping well with the holiday madness. I'm down to finishing the wrapping, a baking day-long date with Sweet which may involve girlydrinks, and giving the house a good cleaning. Guess which one I'm looking forward to most?

The drawback to having my shopping done is forcing myself not to buy another thing from Aldo , even though they have 50% off the regular price of all women's footwear clearance and free shipping and guarantee Christmas delivery on orders placed by 11:59 pm December 17th. Aldo...baby, you're killin' me!

Our beauty expert, Sugar, has submitted her first post and I haven't gotten her bio done yet! I'll be finishing that and getting it posted, so watch for her Holiday Beauty Tips later today!

Shazmataz has posted a new review, Under the Dome by Stephen King on the Book Nook page. It sounds just like my kind of read and since I've lived in a town similar to her description, this will definately be going on my post-holiday To Be Read pile. For those of you who are wondering, when I asked her to pick a nickname to post under, Shazmataz choose the one she went by back in the days we went to junior high school together. So I probably did label her that...just not recently. Her teenage daughters aren't impressed, which just makes it all the more fun! Heheh.

Cher posted the cutest story about an Edible Playhouse on our Mama's Hideaway page. I just want to take a minute to give her a public HUG and THANKS for all her support. She's an absolute treasure!!

We've been discussing how to make all the areas of Whimsicality easier to follow and hopefully the new format we've chose for the New Year will do that. Once again, we want to say thank you to our readers for hanging in with us during our growing pains.

Over the weekend, our friends at Cute-Stuffs launched their Winter Kawaii Giveaway - 3 lucky winners will each scoop a prize pack worth over $65! They've generously given Whimsicality readers 10 bonus chances to win so make sure you don't miss out on this!! I've already told you how generous these ladies are and winners will not be disappointed. Thanks so much to Cute-Stuffs for thinking of our readers. We wish you good luck with your giveaway and hope you all have very Happy Holidays.

Don't forget to enter our giveaways HERE. Tomorrow night our Cute-Stuffs giveaway ends and the winners will be announced Wednesday morning. Good luck everyone!

Hang in there, kids...in two short weeks it will all be done but the relaxing part!

Whimsy1 says TGIF!!

noreply@blogger.com (Whimsy4) — Fri, 10 Dec 2010 13:40:00 +0000

Extreme apolgies to all our subscribers for the repeats...I'm working the kinks out and trying to improve things around here in anticipation of the bright, shiny New Year. My posts have been lacking, but luckily Cher and Sweet have covered me and posted some great stuff on our Mama's Hideaway page.

This weekend I'll be putting up Tangy's bio in anticipation of her jumping into the fray, and our beauty expert, Sugar, is working on her first post so look for her bio in the About Us section too. We're really excited to have them join us.

Our latest giveaway was launched this morning and will have three winners! There are currently three different giveaways running, so hop over to our Giveaways & Reviews page for more information.

Wishing you all a safe and happy weekend!!

Signed 8x10 Prints & Stationery Sets

noreply@blogger.com (Whimsy4) — Fri, 10 Dec 2010 12:30:00 +0000

Cher recently had a photograph posted on her Facebook wall and I was so drawn to it I had to see who the photographer was. She sent me to HeathersPerspectives to see more and I immediatly knew this is an artist to share with our readers. Though I've never been to Cape Cod, while looking at her pictrures of the beach, I am there...smell the salt air, hear the waves crashing, feel the breeze on my face and the sand between my toes. Yes, I'm quite happily beachcombing for driftwood and other treasures! After the holidays, I'll be placing a custom order; I've found the perfect birthday gift for my mom.

Heather admits to a healthy obsession with photography since she was in high school. Not knowing what to do with all the scenic pictures she'd taken and developed, she began mountin gthem onto cardstock and using them as personal stationery back in 2001. They are now available to purchase online in her Etsy shop.

Her striking photgraphs capture the essence of her subject, managing to evoke intense emotions, whether it's a pensive winter mood, the serentiy of a walk in nature, or the desire to share a landmark in sunny St. Lucia.

Heather's specialty is Cape Cod photo cards that are suitable for any occasion. She also makes prints in 5x7 or 8x10 format and will take custom orders. Just convo her to let her know what you would like. New cards and other crafts are added to her shop as creativity strikes, so stop by often to see what new treats this delightful artist has to share. You can visit her Etsy shop by clicking any of the above links or HERE.

Heather's Perspectives has graciously offered to give THREE of our lucky readers some of her beautiful work for their very own. We'd like to extend a hearty thank you to Heather's Perspectives!! Click on any of the photographs for a larger image. Winners will be drawn using Random.org, and the three prizes available are:

FIRST

The first name drawn will receive four 8x10 enlarged prints of the photographs below, signed by the artist PLUS one four-card stationery set, including envelopes. The winner will receive one 8x10 enlargement of the each of the first four photos below, signed by the artist and ready for framing, and one 8 piece stationery set (4 cards+4envelopes) feauring the photgraphs captioned FIRST, ready for you to share with family or friends.

FIRST 1/4

FIRST - 2/4

FIRST - 3/4

FIRST - 4/4

SECOND

The second name drawn will receive one 8x10 signed print PLUS the four card stationery set seen below. The winner will receive one 8x10 enlargement of the first photo below, signed by the artist and ready for framing, and one 8 piece stationery set (4 cards+4envelopes) feauring the photgraphs below, ready for you to share with family or friends.

SECOND - 8x10 and included in stationery set

SECOND - 2/4

SECOND - 3/4

SECOND - 4/4

THIRD

The third name drawn will receive the four card stationery set , including envelopes, seen below PLUS winner's choice of any one stationery set from Heather's Perspectives. If you are this winner, you'll be given a special code to use at Heather's Perspective during checkout and both sets of stationery will be delivered to you in one package.

THIRD - 1/4

THIRD - 2/4

THIRD - 3/4

THIRD - 4/4

*** HOW TO WIN ***

You MUST do this first in order for any other entries to be eligible.

Earn 1 Entry - Visit Heather's Perspective Etsy Shop and come back here to leave a comment on which photograph you liked most.

** HOW TO GAIN EXTRA ENTRIES **

Leave a separate comment here for EACH of these that you do. Winners will be picked using Random.org, so if you only leave one comment that you've done everything, you will only get one entry. Please be sure to leave a way we can contract you if you're one of the winners!

Earn 1 Entry - "Like" HeathersPerspective on Facebook Facebook and come back here to leave your name in a comment.

Earn 1 Entry - Add HeathersPerspective to Your Etsy Favourites and come back here to leave your name in a comment.

Earn 1 Entry - "Like" Whimsicality on Facebook (left sidebar) and leave your name in a comment here.

Earn 1 Entry - Follow Whimsicality on Twitter (left sidebar) and leave your Twitter name in a comment here.

Earn 1 Entry - Follow Whimsicality on Google Friend Connect (left sidebar) and leave a comment here.

Earn 1 Entry - Subscribe to Whimsicality by email or feed (must be confirmed) and leave a comment here.

Earn 1 Entry - Grab Our Button (left sidebar) to display on your blog and leave the link in a comment here.

Earn 1 Entry - Write about this Giveaway on your blog and leave the link in a comment here.

Earn 1 Entry - Tweet about this Giveaway by copying and pasting the red information into a tweet and leave the link in a comment here.

**You may do this daily to earn extra entries, leave the new link in a new comment each day.**

WIN Signed Original Prints & Stationery @whimsy_4 CAN/US18+ (24/12) http://t.co/dIOxXne #giveaway #photography #CapeCod #contest

** OPEN TO CANADA/US 18+ **

** GIVEAWAY PERIOD **

This giveaway will run from 10 December - 24 December 2010. ALL entries must be received no later than 12 p.m. PST on December 24th to be eligible. Winners will be notified by email within 48 hours. It is your responsibility to make sure our email doesn't get lost in your spam filter and to contact us with your shipping information. We will also post the winner's here by the first name on their entry.

** SPECIAL SHIPPING NOTE **

This giveaway ends on Christmas Eve and we're going to do our best not to delay notification and shipping prizes, however we ask that winners give Heather and Whimsicality a little extra patience, as we'll be enjoying the holidays with our families too. Thanks! = )

GOOD LUCK EVERYONE!

The Way Things Were

noreply@blogger.com (Whimsy4) — Thu, 09 Dec 2010 12:56:00 +0000

Last night I got a little caught up reading my old blog. I'm struggling with the holidays. As hard as I try, nothing feels familiar and I'm overwhelmed with a sense of loss. It was comforting to read in my own words what I've always held dear. It confirmed the strength of my memories isn't false. It validated how much I've had to give up. Maybe from that, I can figure out what comes next. For now, I'm going to enjoy what was...

HANG ON TO WHAT WORKS

The Lights

I try to change it up every year, but it just doesn't feel like the holidays until the outdoor lights are up. I like to put them up the last weekend in November. My favourite year, we had icicle lights along the two-level roof, around the upstairs windows & the fence that runs the length of our property. Mamacita had scammed a ton of wreaths from Gawd only knows where, put big red bows on them and we hung them at intervals all along the fence. We got so many compliments that year about how festive it made the neighbourhood look.

This is a minimalist year (no he-man help.) The girls & I lined the front porch with candy cane rope lights. I bought some of the new LED multi-coloured; they give off such pretty jewel tones! We put them around the front window, the door, and also decorated two large pots of greens. It's a cheery effect. As we stood back to examine our work, I nudged the girls and said, "Not bad for a couple of broads, huh?"

Indoors, I hang garland along the railing where our living room overlooks the kitchen and string mini lights through it. Tried white lights one year, but the multi-coloured give a nicer effect. I add small ornaments I've collected through the years and line up a festively dressed collection of teddy bears to watch over the happenings in the kitchen. I love to turn off all the lights except the garland and tree to just enjoy the ambiance.

The Tree

Always fresh, we cut it down at a local farm. The kids whine every year about trudging through the snow, but if I dare to suggest we buy one, they balk that we HAVE to cut our own tree! Go figure. For those who fear the real tree, try this one on...when I was growing up, we had real candles on our real tree, lit on Christmas Eve. German tradition. OMG, I can't even imagine doing that! One year Sweet singed her bangs off blowing them out. Silly sister, blow out the top ones first! *snicker*

I grew up a city-girl, but one of my favourite memories is going to the Canadian Tire parking lot with my dad every year to buy our tree. Proof that it doesn't matter what the tradition is, it's the repetition that builds the cherished memories.

Ornaments are added each year, a personalized one for every family member. The kids love pulling out all the ones they've made over the years. They are hung near the top - with five cats, we have more than our share of breakage, so I save the unsentimental fillers for the bottom half.

The Baking
Not a baker by nature, I do make a serious effort for the holidays, simply because I started when the kids were little and they expect it. One tradition I've let slide that I'm going to remedy: making rum-balls with Sweet. BabyKat, The Kitten and Ling Ling are old enough to do the grunt work. : )

The Ginger Bread House
Another tradition I started when the kids were little. My dad bought them a ginger bread house and they loved looking at it so much, the next year I tried it. After years of throwing out rock hard, uneaten ginger bread houses, last year I had an epiphany.

Does anyone actually eat these things???

Not at my house, so why am I wasting the time and money to bake it? It's the fun and laughter spent together decorating it that matters. This sounds soooo tacky, but I DON'T CARE!! This year, I'm making one out of cardboard and buying all the candies in bulk. I'll make the icing extra thick, we can still play Christmas carols, drink egg nog and decorate to our hearts content.

Father Christmas

This is a tradition I've never shared before. I have a Father Christmas that stands about two and a half feet tall. He's fashioned in traditional style, with a burgundy velvet robe. My dad passed away in September 1999, leaving a gaping hole in my life. We were extremely close. I still miss him every day, and naturally, that's intensified during the holidays.

In an effort to deal with my feelings, I wrote him a letter the first year, pouring out all my wishes and regrets. I pinned it inside the robe of my Father Christmas. At some point during the holidays every year, I write my dad a letter and add it to the others. I don't think anyone else even knows they're there. I don't read them, it just helps to write them. I suppose one year after I'm gone, one of the kids will discover them. I hope it doesn't creep them out.

The Shopping

I start earlier every year because I hate the crowds and this year I'm almost done. Wrapping awaits, and I hate that part. Somehow that always falls to me, but The Kitten has shown a very creative flair and attention to detail, so she'll help more this year. Each child gets undivided time and attention for their gift buying for others. First with me, then with Manimal. It usually includes lunch or dinner out, so December's a pretty good month to be a kid around here.

The Stocking

The girls recently told me the stocking is their favourite part of Christmas.

HUH?

So all those years I ran around like a mad woman searching for the gifts they simply had to have, and spending oodles of money, I didn't have to??? Because the freakin' stocking I filled from the dollar store is their favourite part???

Yep. Sure enough, they each recited what they find every year and how exciting it is to reach in to see what new things I've added. As the kids get older, things have been eliminated and added to reflect their interests. Currently, a stocking in our house includes: a magazine, pens, pencils, hair accessories, nail polish, mini bath gels, mosturizers, hair gel, razor blades, small bottles of cologne, breath mints, keychains, fuel cards, car accessories, lottery tickets, socks, goofy stuff that amuses me, and of course, the required chocolates! More than they need or is good for them, but it's expected.

In honour of Mamacita's German heritage and childhood memories, I always make a trip to a European Deli to buy a marzipan pig and a German newspaper. Manimal's mom is Dutch and he gets double salt licorice (ewwie if you ask me, yet amazingly, he thanks me for it.) While I'm there, I make sure to grab the little chocolates that look like ladybugs - I got these when I was growing up. What the heck ladybugs, pigs, and licorice have to do with Christmas, I haven't a clue but I do it and everyone would be disappointed if I didn't.

Christmas Eve
Not much brings me to tears more reliably than Chrismas service. Why is hard to explain, except it's one of the rare times in life when I feel truly peaceful. We get dressed up for the 8 pm service and after, come back to the house and enjoy a few drinks with our traditional meal of Rouladen, mashed potatoes & red cabbage. After we've tidied up, the kids are allowed to pick one gift each to open...I used to be able to guide them to the new pajamas, but they caught on pretty quickly and I had to change strategies - if I want a particular gift to wait until the morning, I don't put it under the tree until they've gone to bed.

Then there's a wonderful memory that isn't a tradition, but it's become part of family legend and I suppose the re-telling of the story has become a tradition of it's own. Each year the kids got older, it seemed they would wake us earlier and earlier. Six years ago, it had gotten to the ridiculous 4:30 am! The next year, the Prince and I stayed up until 3 am, enjoying a few drinks and talking. When we realized the kids would likely be waking us within an hour or two, we both groaned. Suddenly, he got a gleam in his eye. "Let's turn the table on them."

We gathered a few bells and the camera, waited about forty-five minutes before going upstairs. Ringing the bells loudly, an overacting Manimal was chuckling, "Ho ho ho! Merry Christmas! Wake up kids - Santa's been here!"

Three bleary eyed kids squinted at us, moaned, and flopped back in bed...the pictures are priceless. Manimal and I became giddy from oxygen deprivation caused by laughing too hard, so obviously we can't be held responsible for what followed.

We made the little buggers get up and have Christmas morning.

The whole nine yards. They perked up with hot chocolate while they opened their presents, and aside from the fact it was still dark out, we enjoyed our traditional breakfast of cinnamon buns, omelettes, english muffins and jams. They laughingly told us we must be getting senile or somethin' for acting so crazy. Seven year-old Kitten asked, "Did you forget you guys are the parents?"

Everyone was back in bed by 7:30 and we all slept until noon. It was wonderful. The following year, nobody woke us until the respectable hour of 7 am.

Boxing Day Madness

At our house, Boxing Day isn't about shopping. It's usually the day Sweet and I, with our collection of children, get together to celebrate the holidays. As families grew over the years, there were in-laws with their own traditions to consider and it just never seemed worth it to create hard feelings when it should be about celebrating.

We NEED to have that special day together and Boxing Day works well. It's very low key and fun-filled. As long as we can all pile in and hang out, it doesn't matter where we are. Some years it's been at Mamacita's house, others at mine or Sweet's. There usually isn't enough space, there's too much food and it never lasts long enough.

It's the relaxing part of the holidays to kick back, have a few drinks, and just enjoy being together. It's gone from little ones bundled up to play in the snow and go tobogganing to young adults bringing along their boyfriends & girlfriends. The family stories, dormant since Thanksgiving, get re-told amid laughter and teasing. One tradition that's taken hold is a highly competitive, totally stupid, absolutely hilarious game called Spoons. The holidays just wouldn't be the same without it.

~December 2005

I had a thought...

noreply@blogger.com (Whimsy4) — Wed, 08 Dec 2010 23:38:00 +0000

You haven't?

Well, count yourself among the rare few. I'm behind on everything, can't seem to concentrate, and am now sending emails to let people know just because they haven't received a reply from me yet doesn't mean they've been forgotten.

Emails to advise of pending emails. That's just wrong.

Wow! What is it about this time of year? Each day begins with the best of intentions...but there's so much available to distract me. If cats and dogs yammering for attention don't do it, there's always people walking in and out of the room expecting me to drop everything because they've suddenly decided to share their plans. Why am I always the one expected to conform, go along, make everyone else comfortable?

Notice Me, Please Notice Me!

For most of this morning I managed to stay on track, but when I joined the blog hop at the Great Canadian Link Exchange, I realized their blog button is missing from our Linky Love page. It's bad enough that I haven't even filled out our profile or answered emails...not having their button is just downright rude! As I searched for the code, I made note of all the great Canadians to visit, but then I got distracted again...this time by the Peacock and Lime Etsy store...ooh, pretty, shiny things!!!

At least I enjoyed that distraction. This photo was on a friend's Facebook profile...where my mind went after that is probably best left unsaid.

Does this cat make my butt look big?

Tomorrow we're announcing a new giveaway open to Canada and the US....as long as the sponsor emails a couple of pix and providing I don't get distracted again.

The Way Things Are

noreply@blogger.com (Whimsy4) — Tue, 07 Dec 2010 19:16:00 +0000

I've been a mite overwhelmed and seriously remiss in introducing one of our writers. She's been giving me a ton of support, which quite frankly has been lacking in my life these days. I recently told her she's made Junior Partner...a position that still offers no money or equipment upgrade. Her reply: she's all about the prestigious title and gladly accepts.

Please. How can I not love her?!?!

Cher is a happily married Vancouver native and SAHM to a 13 year old girl and an 18 month old boy...that takes some serious energy and quick thinking! She's also delightfully funny, kind and very resourceful. We're looking forward to everything she'll bring to the blog, especially reminding us what it's like to raise a toddler. Until the New Year, she'll mainly be posting on Mama's Hideaway but once things settle down after the holidays, she'll be popping up all over. I'm so happy to (belatedly) say, "Welcome to Whimsicality, Cher!" Please read her latest post, Santa's Christmas Eve Run, and leave a comment to welcome her.

Mancub is home from the oil rigs and off work until 3 January. I've missed him so much and we had a nice chat yesterday. Two weeks seems like forever to this Mama. Aside from our chats, another benefit to him being home with Pink Lady and their furbaby is finding random comments on my Facebook wall, such as this morning:

Scene: Supermarket, checkout counter. Populated.

"Why are you buying Lucky Charms?"

"Cause they were out of Count Chocula."

"Mancub, you're 22 years old, why don't you go get some Shreddies or some other grown-up cereal?"

"I just spent 2 weeks being a grown-up, and if I wanna bloody buy Lucky Charms cereal, then I am gonna damn well get em!"

I wonder how many guys read that and thought, "Why is this an issue? His first answer was perfectly acceptable." Heheh. Times like that are all about the difference between men and women, I am totally amused.

Sometimes watching your child in an adult relationship is hard; you know they have to go through the push and pull men and women go through as every couple does. When it's my son and I happen to adore the woman he's with, and can see both sides clearly, it's difficult to disassociate myself from whatever difficulty they might be having. Knowing that they both treat each other with respect makes it easier to button my lip, not that they complain to me much.

It's not always as case of them complaining...because I enjoy and respect them both, I often have to work at reminding myself that simply because I am his mother, it's important for me to watch those lines and show respect for their relationship and choices.

Super-simple example: While visiting them in the spring, their new couch arrived and they were trying to decide where it would look best. I made a few suggestion and immediately slapped myself in the head and said, "What am I saying? It's your couch and your home. Nobody wants the MIL telling them where to put their furniture!" My place is to listen, love, enjoy, and support them. I'm very fortunate and will continue to work hard not be the sort of "mother-in-law" they ever dread seeing.

More difficult is the situation with BabyKat. I know she and my grandson are not being treated properly. It's obvious to anyone with an ounce of common sense. I held my tongue for three years, waiting for her chosen to grow up, treating him as one of my own, supporting them in every way possible. Even when all to often, The Kitten paid the price and it damaged my own relationship. When I finally did speak up (read "Lost It") they moved back to Ontario. The next day.

Now I'm not allowed to see my grandson, my daughter is estranged from almost our entire family and it's a hell I wouldn't wish on any mother. Yesterday she received the package I sent with Christmas outfits and holiday things for her and little MisterMan. She can't even find it in her to send a simple thank you. I'm still struggling with the concept that one boy has managed to rip my family apart and the young woman I raised and adore has let him. Keeping a cherished grandson away from the people who have been there, loving, doing, supporting...from the first moment...is beyond cruel. Obviously I'm still grieving.

A dear friend gave me some excellent advice yesterday. We put too much pressure on ourselves over the holidays. They always come and go. It's important not to let the ones you love who are with you suffer because of the ones you love who aren't. The rest of my day will be spent wrapping and getting packages ready for the post office. The Kitten pointed out this morning that we still don't have our tree up so that's the plan for tonight. Time to make this old cave Christmasy and filled with love!

Need a MundayBluz Cure?

noreply@blogger.com (Whimsy4) — Mon, 06 Dec 2010 21:05:00 +0000

Go ahead, try and tell me this didn't make you smile!

Winners of Lightning Stocking Stuffer Contest

noreply@blogger.com (Whimsy4) — Mon, 06 Dec 2010 16:40:00 +0000

Thanks to everyone who referred friends to our Facebook page!

Kristina H. won her choice of prize - and for joining - her friend Kristina B. also wins a prize.

Winners have been notified by Facebook.

Click to enlarge

You're Not Our Kind, Dear

noreply@blogger.com (Whimsy4) — Mon, 06 Dec 2010 05:59:00 +0000

Remember the scene where Julia Roberts goes shopping on Rodeo Drive to buy clothes with the wads of cash Richard Gere gave her....and the rude saleswoman won't serve her? Then she goes back all prettied up, with tons of bags from other stores and asks if they work on commission...the woman nods and Julia holds up all the bags and says, "Big mistake. Huge."

The Kitten & I went to Melanie Lyne today to spend the gift card I won in October. When we first walked in, the saleswoman said hello and immediately went to the manager, whispered to her, and then followed us like a bad detective. She wasn't even clever about it. I have never felt that closely scrutinized in a store before. Ever.

I've shopped in high-end stores in Canada and the U.S. and never had an experience like that. The Kitten said under her breath, "I feel like she's going to kick us out." I was so ready to pull that card out and go all Julia on her ass before walking out the door. Instead, I started weaving all over the place randomly, just to make her work for a bit.

I swear people who work in higher end stores must smell tough times, but that was really insulting. It's not like we resemble street people and it really sucked the fun out of it.

Most of the clothes were gorgeous, some were horrific, and I couldn't find a single thing I wanted for myself. There was a time I didn't have to watch every penny but today I was really choking on the prices. Even though it was FREE and they were having a 50% off sale!

I ended up getting DD a pretty sheer blouse to wear over a cami, and a little something-something for Sweet and Mancub's girlfriend. (I can't wait for Christmas to be over so I don't have to keep all these secrets!)

So half the prize is left on the card...going to save that for buying my dress for Sweet's wedding. Three items...$250...this sounds so complainy but I really wish it had been a card for Winner's instead.

Santa & Technology

noreply@blogger.com (Whimsy4) — Sun, 05 Dec 2010 15:46:00 +0000

While looking for videos of my favourite Christmas songs, I found a little gem. How wonderful that a copy of this survived 112 years and was shared on YouTube! Enjoy some holiday cheer boosted by some amazing technology. I wonder what Santa thinks of all the changes?

Our First Giveaway Winner!

noreply@blogger.com (Whimsy4) — Sat, 04 Dec 2010 19:59:00 +0000

Thank you to everyone who entered our Getting to Know You Giveaway! If you didn't win this time, be sure to keep trying because you can't win if you don't enter. Our Stocking Stuffers Giveaway is open until Sunday night, you have until December 14th for a chance to win Character Earbuds & Phone Charm from Cute-Stuffs and the Yves Rocher Cosmetic Prize Pack giveaway sponsored by Canadian Free Stuff is open until Dec 21st.

We have more giveaways coming soon so stop in daily so you don't miss the announcements. Have a great weekend!!!

The winner of the Marcelle Revival Gift Set has been notified by email, but I hope you'll all grab some good Karma and join us in congratulating her by leaving a nice comment!! = )

Congratulations to Annie 1! = )

Click on photo to enlarge.

Let's Define Enough

noreply@blogger.com (Whimsy4) — Fri, 03 Dec 2010 12:40:00 +0000

Welcome to our new readers! We're so happy you found us and hope you'll jump in with comments and let us get to know you. The behind -the-scenes construction is still going on and I haven't had the time to enter contests or apply for freebies in a while, so today was all about power contesting. Just as I was getting a little weary, two of our readers that are also Canadian Free Stuff members announced their big wins on the forum. Congratulations, ladies!! Thanks for sharing your excitement, reminding the rest of us that real people DO win.

Remember that today is the last day to enter our Getting to Know You Giveaway for a chance to win a Marcelle Revival Gift Set valued at $46. It's still low entries so your odds HERE are pretty awesome. Good luck to everyone and thanks for entering our very first giveaway!

Have you ever marveled at the jams little people can get themselves into? Cher's got a hilarious story on our Mama's Hideaway page about her son's recent uh-oh moment and the photographic evidence is classic.

On the more serious side, the rest of this post is provokes examination of how each of us interprets the holiday season. I have funny, wise, incredible friends and that's a wonderful start to Friday. I hope yours is a good one!

Wow! December. This is a big month in so many ways.

Christmas is now in the countdown of days and not weeks or months. With that comes all the stress of "Do I have presents for everyone, do i have ENOUGH presents for everyone?" Really what is enough? Is one enough? Is it really important the number or just the fact that you remembered? Do we base number of presents on how "close" that person is? Like parent, sibling, spouse, child, compared to friend, neighbour, co-worker? How much to spend?

What if there is no extra in the budget?

What if every month you make enough money to pay your rent and your bills, your transportation (bus or car) and put food on your table to feed your family but there isn't any left over money. What happens at Christmas time? Do you not pay your rent this month and tell your landlord or whoever, "Well, it's Christmas ya know." Or skip the bill payments this month so you can double up next month, or just fall further behind? Or maybe try not to eat so much, until of course Christmas, when you are supposed to have that big meal?

Sometimes it is hard to be "festive" when you can't DO all of the festivities.

In my family this is also a big birthday month. My father, grandfather, brother, daughter, myself...all December birthdays. My father and grandfather have passed on now, my brother and I are not really close anymore. Those days still have emotions connected to them though. My baby will be 26 this year! And I have always tried to make her day special but because it is so close to that other special day of the year, and I do not mean MY birthday, it has not always gone the way I would like. Her preference for at least the past ten years for her birthday dinner has been M&M's Meatshops. We do mozzarella sticks, sausage rolls, chicken wings, dips, mini quiches, all the appetizer goodies. Then of course there is cake! Bailey's creamcheese cake has been the house fave the past couple of years. I try to have the money to make her dinner special but then the gift tends to pale in comparison. I am always left feeling like I didn't do ENOUGH (hmmm there's that word again).

Two days before the BIG DAY is my birthday. As a kid I always felt like it was a rather unimportant day. My brother is born 10 days before me (but 6 years later) and always had a "birthday present" and then 15 days later "Christmas presents". I on the other hand often got told on my birthday, you will get your birthday present on Christmas (in other words the birthday-slash-Christmas present). So it was never "said" but I always "felt" that it wasn't that big a deal. Yeah as a kid that hurt, so there aren't a lot of feel good memories associated with my birthday. When I was 12 I had a very traumatic, life-changing, soul-changing experience happen ON my birthday, and from then until well after I was married I actually hated my birthday. An awful way for anyone to feel about the MOST SPECIAL day of the year (because really there isn't a more special day for each and every single one of us than the day we entered this life).

In the beginning of my marriage I still felt like an after-thought due to that typical male habit of putting things off to the last minute, and I mean the absolute LAST MINUTE. The day of my birthday was when my husband went shopping. Two days before the BIG DAY for everybody else. So imagine my birthday dinner. Frustration, tension, anger, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME! He did get better over the years, especially once he learned how unhappy it made me when he waited till the final moments to think of me. It's not that I wanted bigger or more, I just wanted to know I wasn't a last minute thought. That even if it was just a card, it was thought of in advance, like I mattered ENOUGH.

So while some of you out there CELEBRATE in so many ways in December, there are others who don't. I KNOW it is not just HUM-BUG, for some it is not important, for others it is painful, and for still others it has become so commercialized that it is just WHATEVER.

What it is has become for me is a time of deep reflection. December is the month where I look deep within. I journal from the soul, looking back at what I have accomplished over the past year, and who I have become. Then I look at the goals I set in writing (in my journal) last December. Did I accomplish them? Did I exceed my expectations?

Now after all of that review, I start setting new goals. My goals are broken down into categories. Personal, Mental, Spiritual, and Professional. I will often set up to 10 goals in each category. That can be as simple as I will cut my hair every three or four months, to something more meaningful and complex, like developing a deeper relationship with a family member or friend that I have lost touch with or have a damaged relationship with.

If you are finding that the "traditional" is not fulfilling ENOUGH for you, then maybe it is time to go deeper.

Living the Love and Laughing ~ Spicy