Who Hijacked Our Country

When Bad Behavior is Encouraged and Enabled

2009-11-08T16:55:00.000-08:00

It’s become a tired cliché for older people to complain about today’s spoiled brats, especially in comparison to their own rugged childhood and strict upbringing. “My folks whupped me if I got out of line,” etc.

But maybe things really have gone too far the other way. This article talks about low expectations becoming a self-fulfilling prophecy. The result is bad behavior which often continues into adulthood.

"Negative expectations on the part of both parents and children predict more negative behaviors later on,” according to a psychology professor.

The same professor also said, "Sometimes parents expect more negative behavior from their own adolescents than they should…”

Maybe some of the old adages were true after all. Who among us never got that stern parental warning: “Careful! What if your face froze in that position???”

And sometimes these badly-brought-up uneducated rubes get together with like-minded friends. The results are not pretty.

And now, Republican leaders are going over their to-do list, making sure there isn’t a single group they haven’t alienated yet.

Women — Check.
Hispanics — Check.
Blacks — Check.
Working people — Check.
Non-Biblethumpers — Check.
People with foreign-sounding last names — Check.
Jews — Check.

Apparently, some of those politically-correct oversensitive Jewish leaders are getting a tad irritated by the rightwads’ constant comparisons of Hitler and Obama. Gee, ya think?

Tom Coburn Hates Veterans

2009-11-06T17:16:00.000-08:00

Senator Tom Coburn (R-Shitstain) has placed a legislative hold on the Veterans’ Caregiver and Omnibus Health Benefits Act of 2009 (S 1963). This is his way of protesting against the stimulus bill, which he has called “the worst act of generational theft in our nation’s history.”

Thirteen military and veterans’ groups have sent a letter to Harry Reid saying: “It is essential that Congress act on this comprehensive measure without further delay. Thousands of disabled veterans with serious medical conditions and the family members who care for them are counting on this additional support.”

Steve Robertson, the legislative director for The American Legion, met with Coburn’s staff to try arranging for some sort of compromise. No dice. He said:

“For a lot of family caregivers, delay is costing them their jobs and their savings. It’s having a big impact. They made it clear that Sen. Coburn sees this as using his rights as a senator to place a hold on a bill…I agree with that, but that doesn’t mean it makes sense to hold up a bill that would do a lot of good things for veterans that has cleared a committee and is ready for a vote.”

Sixty-one years ago an inbred redneck got fucked by a Neanderthal, and it gave birth to Tom Coburn. If you’d like to tell him that (in so many words), please click here.

A few other Senate Republicans learned something yesterday — something most of us already learned in elementary school. If you play hooky from school, the rest of the class will continue on without you. Time doesn’t stand still for you just because you’re having a tantrum.

For people who never learned this in school, the business world teaches the same lesson, often more bluntly. Don’t show up for work, and your coworkers will get along just fine without you. And your boss might discover that he/she doesn’t need you any more.

For the sake of all Republican readers out there (in case that isn’t an oxymoron), a well-known self-help book has now been rewritten: All I Really Need To Know, I learned when I was 57 years old.

This last story has a certain irony to it. Republicans won’t get it, but for people whose IQs are ABOVE freezing, it should be good for a laugh: At Michele Bachmann’s anti-Government Takeover anti-Socialized Medicine rally yesterday, one of the John Galt wannabes had a heart attack. Fortunately for Howard Roark Junior, some of those hated socialist bureaucrats were close at hand, and they resuscitated him.

As Mr. Bootstraps was being wheeled away by about ten government medical personnel, John Boner was spewing into his mike: “Join us in defeating Pelosi care!”

The Voters Have Spoken! Obama is Toast! FINISHED!!!

2009-11-04T16:20:00.000-08:00

Sheesh, will the “liberal” media dial it down already. Two Republican governors get elected, and you’d think 300 million American citizens were charging toward the White House carrying torches and pitchforks.

Yes it sucks that two large states now have Republican governors. It’s not the end of the world.

I like the Upstate New York congressional race better. The 23rd District hasn’t sent a Democrat to Congress in over a hundred years. This should have been a slam dunk for the Republican candidate, Dierdre Scozzafava.

She was endorsed by the NRA and Newt Gingrich, among others. But she didn’t spew out enough fire and brimstone over abortion and gay rights, so the knuckledraggers kicked her out of their Big Tent. The single-digit-IQ brigade had their own knight in shining armor — Conservative Party Candidate Doug Hoffman. Calling all teabaggers, tenthers, afterbirthers, snakehandlers — here’s our chance to drive out those pansy moderates and Take Our Party Back!

Or as this article described it, Doug Hoffman got his teabags dunked. Democrat Bill Owens, a retired Air Force Captain, will now represent the 23rd District in Congress.

If you aren’t a resident of Washington State, the name Tim Eyman probably doesn’t mean anything. If you live in Washington, Tim Eyman is either a swashbuckling hero, saving Washington’s harried taxpayers from those tax-and-spend bureaucrats; or he’s a M&%$#&F#$%^&#in’ $#!%&%&$#!!#$%$#%#$!!!! There’s no in-between.

Eyman will never sleep as long as there’s still a library, public school, city park, fire department or any other socialist government service that hasn’t been shut down. His latest save-the-taxpayers gimmick got defeated yesterday. It was leading two to one in the polls just a few weeks ago. Thank God the voters came to their senses.

From the few pictures of him that I’ve seen, he looks like that nerdy comedian from several Seinfeld episodes; the one who kept saying “The best, Jerry. The Best!” and “I’ve been working out. I’m huge!”

Anyway, there was an interesting tidbit about him in last Sunday’s Seattle paper. It seems Tim Eyman himself is $250,000 in debt. That’s the amount he spent hiring all of those paid signature-gatherers so he could get his “grassroots revolt” onto the ballot. And now he doesn't have the money. I guess preaching about thrift and personal responsibility is more fun than actually practicing it.

Now before you go, here’s a short quiz (only five questions) you can have some fun with. I won’t give away any answers but here’s a little hint: no matter how sick and twisted you think the Far Right is — they’re even worse.

September 11th, 2001 — The Republican Rewrite

2009-11-02T14:11:00.000-08:00

Here is what really happened that day:

On the morning of September 11th, 2001, the World Trade Center was attacked by waves of health reform socialists. Thousands of these pestilent liberals swarmed all over the Twin Towers, annihilating free enterprise and liberty everywhere they went.

In their wake, they left a heartbreaking trail of redistributed wealth and health insurance coverage for millions of previously uninsured Americans. The agony! America still hasn’t recovered from this Day of Infamy.

The Far Right has a new Official Demon™. When the Cold War ended, they needed a replacement for **Communism** and they came up with **The Homosexual Agenda**. Ever since September 11, 2001 **The Terrorists** (i.e. anyone with a dark complexion and a Middle Eastern name) has been their favorite code word.

And now those swarthy Arabs have been replaced. According to Rep. Virginia Foxx (R-Inbred), **Socialized Medicine** has replaced the darkskinned furriner as the thing Americans should fear most. Today on the House floor, she said:

“I believe the greatest fear that we all should have to our freedom comes from this room — this very room — and what may happen later this week in terms of a tax increase bill masquerading as a health care bill. I believe we have more to fear from the potential of that bill passing than we do from any terrorist right now in any country.”

Coming soon: Another one of those spontaneous demonstrations in Washington, DC. Michele Bachmann has summoned her gang of vacant-stare gullible dimwits to gather next week in D.C. They’ve been instructed to show their patriotic love for America and their visceral hatred of inept faceless bureaucrats meddling in their health care. They will carry out their marching orders as directed.

The next moderate pussy to be kicked out of the Republican Big Tent: George H.W. Bush.

In 1987, when he was still Reagan’s vice president, Bush told Mikhail Gorbachev: “Reagan is a conservative. An extreme conservative. All the blockheads and dummies are for him, and when he says that something is necessary, they trust him.”

OOOPS.

Republicans — Everybody is the ENEMY, Even Big Business

2009-10-31T00:10:00.000-07:00

The current Republican Party is so anti-everything and so full of hatred and fear and loathing, they even hate their traditional allies. They probably hate themselves most of all. No wonder they're the biggest customers of those bondage and S&M hookers. "Whip Me!" "Gouge my nipple! Uuuugghhh!!! It hurts soo gooood!!!"

They aren’t even the party of Big Business any more. Their only purpose is to derail anything and everything Obama tries to do. And some of those traitorous corporations are actually cooperating with that commie president. NOOO!!!

The most glaring example right now is the health reform debate. As this article by Peter Suderman says:

“From the time the bill hit Congress, Republicans found themselves opposite big industry interests. From the drugmakers to the doctors to the insurers, every major player in the health-care battle declared themselves willing to work with Democrats to enact some variant on reform.”

Former Senate Majority Leaders Bob Dole and Bill Frist have both spoken out in favor of at least some portions of Obama’s health reform agenda. And they both have financial ties to the health care industry.

It’s the same with every other task Obama is trying to accomplish. Clean energy legislation, the stimulus, regulating the finance industry — some businesses are in favor of these reforms, or they’re at least wanting to cooperate and compromise with the Democrats. But Republicans? If that Kenyan Fascist Muslim babykilling Socialist wants it, Republicans are agin’ it. No ifs. No exceptions.

Whenever that Republican Big Tent threatens to get too big or too diverse, the exit door opens. Anyone who isn't hateful or bigoted enough gets the Heave-Ho.

This whole thing brings to mind Bob Dylan's hilarious 1960's song "Talkin' John Birch Paranoid Blues".

He's pretending to be a paranoid neurotic wingtard John Bircher type, thinking that everybody's a hidden Communist agent trying to subvert the country. He ends the song with "So now I'm sittin' home investigatin' myself! Hope I don't find out anything...hmmm, Great God!"

The next logical step is for Republicans to start torturing and executing themselves for being everything they hate. If only...

Republican “purists” always say they need to “stand for something,” to stick to their “principles” and weed out those pussy moderates and "RINOs." And what would those principles be? Anyone know???

What If Bush Had Done That?

2009-10-29T00:11:00.000-07:00

That’s the question that this article is asking. “What if Bush had done that?”

I haven’t clicked on the story yet, but that’s an excellent question. What if Bush had done, well, anything.

Obama’s workload would be about a trillion percent easier if the Worst Dumbest Shittiest President EVER had done something — anything! — besides invading other countries and cutting taxes for his corporate donors.

As you know, Obama has spent the last few months fighting the fight of his life for health care reform. What if Bush had done that? Well, let’s see — eight years times 45,000 (the number of Americans who die each year from lack of health care) — about 360,000 Americans would be alive right now instead of being murder victims; victims of our mercenary health insurance industry.

Another Herculean challenge facing President Obama is: trying to rein in that gargantuan out-of-control Frankenstein known as the finance industry. He’s trying to re-establish some of the banking regulations we used to have up until twenty-odd years ago. What if Bush had done that? Well, for starters, the Great Financial Meltdown of 2008 — the worst since 1929 — would have been averted. Millions of unemployed Americans are no doubt wishing Bush had done that. They’d still have jobs, homes and bank accounts.

Climate change and the energy crisis are two more problems that will eat this country alive if something isn’t done. Obama is pushing for clean energy legislation which will start mitigating both of those crises. What if Bush had done that? Imagine that. Gasoline at $5 a gallon, global warming threatening to become our worst nightmare, thousands of knuckle-dragging inbred simplefucks blubbering about “Drill Baby Drill!” — all of this would’ve been something out of a bad science fiction movie.

Also, President Obama scored higher than 100 on an IQ test. What if Bush had done that?

When a Billionaire Has Fallen and Can’t Get Up

2009-10-27T00:49:00.000-07:00

I hate to point out a silver lining in the housing collapse that’s fucked over so many millions of Americans. But Goddamn it, this just Feeels Sooo Fuckin’ Gooood.

The biggest real estate deal in American history has collapsed. Now I don’t care if a few filthy rich people find a way to make even more money and get even richer. But this particular scam — even though it was perfectly legal — would have made billions of dollars at the expense of thousands of renters who had been playing by the rules, doing everything right, and almost had the rug pulled out from under them.

Sometimes lightning strikes the right person.

In 2006, an investment group led by New York City real estate firm Tishman Speyer Properties and BlackRock Realty Advisors purchased two huge Manhattan apartment complexes — Stuyvesant Town and Peter Cooper Village. And of course the $5.4 billion price included the lives of the 25,000 people in those two apartment complexes.

$5.4 billion for 25,000 people. Well, at least that’s more valuable than the “ten dollars a life!” from the “In Cold Blood” murders — mostly because of inflation, not because of any sort of ethics or morals on the part of these wannabe robber barons.

The Crooks Who Would Be King are almost certain to default on their $3 billion mortgage and the $1.4 billion secondary loan they bought the property with.

Their plans for converting thousands of apartments into luxury condos — to be sold at market value — are up in smoke. Awww.

A few would-be oligarchs have fallen and they can’t get up. And twenty-five thousand middle class renters can keep their lives. Works for me.

In other news: this headline is asking Are Humans Still Evolving?

Are?

You?

Fuckin’

Kidding???

Still More Republican Lies About Health Care Reform

2009-10-25T01:07:00.000-07:00

Every time the Republicans recite the bullshit their HMO puppetmasters tell them to recite, the lie gets refuted over and over. And like a cat that keeps jumping up on the table no matter how many times you push him off, the Republicans keep coming back with more intelligence-insulting lies to the American people. Is anybody still listening?

Yesterday’s weekly GOP radio/internet address was delivered by Republican Nebraska Sen. Mike Johanns. His health insurance johns instructed their prostitute to keep spewing out their same old talking points, and Senator Johanns performed his assigned task as ordered.

If repeated lies could be physically transformed into fecal matter, Senator Johanns’ mouth would look like a whale with explosive diarrhea.

“To the factory worker, who has forgone pay raises for the promise of better insurance benefits for you and your family: your health insurance will be taxed and your premiums will go up.”

“To the recent college graduate burdened with student loans: you'll be forced to buy health insurance the government mandates, and if you refuse, you'll be hit with a penalty.”

“To our seniors, who wish to receive care in the comfort of their homes: funding for hospice care and home health care services would be cut.”

First of all, if you actually believe the Republican Party gives a flying fuck about factory workers, senior citizens or recent college graduates (unless they’re MBAs on their way to Wall Street) — I can get you a great deal on some oceanfront property in Kansas.

And who exactly still listens to the GOP weekly address? Does their audience include ANYBODY whose parents aren’t first cousins???

Uh oh, Senator Johanns forgot to mention Death Panels, and the thousands of Canadian citizens who are dying on the Emergency Room floor every week while they wait and wait and wait for some faceless socialist bureaucrat to help them.

Maybe the most blatant Republican lies are being quietly taken out of circulation. But they keep coming up with new ones, and there's always a new battalion of inbreds who will believe them.

Heritage Foundation: “Rape is Good”

2009-10-23T02:17:00.000-07:00

If you visit liberal/”alternative” news sites or blogs, you probably know about the Halliburton/KBR employee who was gang raped in Iraq by some of her coworkers. (You didn’t find out about it from the mainstream “media” since they’ve been too busy with the Balloon Boy and the usual celebutante drivel.)

This rape victim’s employment contract had a clause which prohibited her from taking any legal action against her employer in the event she was raped. Senator Al Franken proposed an amendment that would prohibit the Pentagon from doing business with any company that requires female employees to sign one of these “I promise not to squeal or sue my employer if I get raped by my coworkers” agreements.

Thirty (30) senators voted AGAINST this amendment. Yes of course they were all Republicans. You had to ask?

Here is a list of the Thirty Pieces of Shit — those pathetic pitiful little dickwads who think rape in the defense of Halliburton is no vice. (Sorry, Barry G.)

And the ultra-rightwing Heritage Foundation thinks Al Franken’s amendment is just the usual liberal whining; just a payoff to trial lawyers and those unscrupulous employees who file frivolous lawsuits against their employers.

In a related story, the Republican leadership is trying to attract some normal people — i.e. people who walk upright, breathe through their noses and have IQs above freezing — into the GOP. But they aren’t sure how to accomplish this, what with all the bookburning knuckledragging sickfucks who dominate the party (see above).

President Obama’s Enemies List

2009-10-21T11:06:00.000-07:00

All right everybody, mind your Ps and Qs and watch what you say in public, or you too might end up on Obama’s Enemies List!

OOOOHHHH!!!!

This dire warning comes from Senator Lamar Alexander (R-Duuhh). The good senator spelled it all out for that powergrabbing commie in the White House: “Don’t start an enemies list.”

He was referring of course to Richard Nixon, who created an enemies list, based on the Nixon paranoid mentality of “everybody is against us and we are going to get them.”

Alexander named several of Obama’s terrifying power grabs: boycotting Fox News, criticizing the U.S. Chamber of Commerce, and threatening to take away the health insurance industry’s exemption from federal anti-trust laws.

It brings to mind that stirring heartbreaking poem from Nazi Germany: “…when they stripped away the insurance industry’s anti-trust exemption, I said nothing…and then when they came for me…”

Are you frightened yet? The Gestapo could be knocking at your door any minute now! Or would that be the KGB? Since Obama is a Communist, a Fascist AND a Muslim terrorist (we got us a threefer!), that dreaded midnight knock at the door could be the Gestapo, the KGB or the Islamic Revolutionary Guard. Any way you look at it, we’re all doomed!

Barack Obama’s Enemies List [sigh] Let’s see, on the one hand, a president argues with the U.S. Chamber of Commerce and tries to apply already-existing anti-trust laws to a ruthless corporate behemoth that’s threatening to take down the whole country. And on the other hand, a president who recruited the CIA and FBI to spy on campus protesters and tried to get the IRS to audit his political opponents.

Yup, same thing.

Hey, I just thought of something. I don’t need to use comment moderation any more. Now that my Master is watching over all of us — if you leave a negative comment, I’ll simply e-mail it to the White House, and you’ll be hauled away to one of Obama’s infamous re-education camps before you know it.

MWAAAHAAHAAHAAHAAA

Tim Phillips: Portrait of a Parasite

2009-10-19T10:39:00.000-07:00

If a bucket of excrement could somehow be imbued with consciousness and an evil intelligence, you’d have Tim Phillips.

Karl Rove and the late unlamented Lee Willie Horton Atwater have been household names for years. But Tim Phillips has managed to stay beneath the radar, as well as beneath contempt. FreedomWorks is the best known of the “grass roots” front organizations for the Health Insurance lobby. But Americans For Prosperity (AFP), led by Tim Phillips, is just as busy behind the scenes. And they’re every bit as slippery and underhanded.

HMO employees and lobbyists disguised as protesters, inbred dunces who are gullible enough to believe all the bullshit spewed out by the HMO lobby — Americans For Prosperity has it all. In addition to fighting health care reform, Americans For Prosperity has other Astroturf front groups “protesting” against labor unions and clean energy legislation.

In the late 1990s, Tim Phillips and Ralph Reed were working together to unify devout Christians and corporate powerbrokers against their common enemy: those wicked Satanic bureaucrats who were regulating the energy industry. Their organization was called Century Strategies. Their “grass roots” campaign was what led to the deregulation frenzy that brought us the Enron meltdown — which caused thousands of people to lose their jobs, retirement pensions and life savings. Hallelujah!

Remember now, they were just following the Bible. Who could forget that stirring passage where Jesus said: “Get those fuckin’ socialist bureaucrats out of the oil industry! NOW, Asshole!”

After wreaking havoc on millions of people, Phillips sunk even lower. In the history of political attack ads, one particular commercial set the all-time record for its long reach into the depths of putrid. Yes, you know the one — that 2002 TV ad that equated Senator Max Cleland (Vietnam veteran and triple amputee) with Osama bin Laden. And that ad was produced by none other than…drum roll…Tim Phillips.

Rachel Maddow interviewed Phillips on her show and called him a parasite. That’s putting it mildly.

Give ‘Em Hell Obama

2009-10-17T16:59:00.000-07:00

Yeah! The gloves are starting to come off. We’ve had months and months of bilge spewing out of the rightwing hateheads. The health sharks have spent hundreds of billions on lobbyists, sleazy attack ads, phony “reports” and Astroturf front groups.

Finally, the President of the United States is swinging back. In his weekly address, President Obama said:

“This is the unsustainable path we’re on, and it’s the path the insurers want to keep us on. In fact, the insurance industry is rolling out the big guns and breaking open their massive war chest – to marshal their forces for one last fight to save the status quo. They’re filling the airwaves with deceptive and dishonest ads. They’re flooding Capitol Hill with lobbyists and campaign contributions. And they’re funding studies designed to mislead the American people. [...]

It’s smoke and mirrors. It’s bogus. And it’s all too familiar. Every time we get close to passing reform, the insurance companies produce these phony studies as a prescription and say, “Take one of these, and call us in a decade.” Well, not this time. The fact is, the insurance industry is making this last-ditch effort to stop reform even as costs continue to rise and our health care dollars continue to be poured into their profits, bonuses, and administrative costs that do nothing to make us healthy – that often actually go toward figuring out how to avoid covering people. And they’re earning these profits and bonuses while enjoying a privileged exception from our anti-trust laws, a matter that Congress is rightfully reviewing.”

Here’s the video of Obama’s speech.

Health Insurance Companies: “Go Ahead, Cut the Baby in Half”

2009-10-15T13:11:00.000-07:00

To everybody with at least two brain cells to rub together, it’s been obvious since the early 1990s that the health insurance industry has only one interest: gouging as many people as possible for as much money as possible. Period.

Their interest in health care is about the same as a loan shark’s heartfelt concern that everybody should have as much money as they need.

If the HMOs’ cutthroat mentality wasn’t obvious fifteen years ago, it became crystal clear last August when thousands of ~~HMO lobbyists and their inbred mouthbreathing followers~~ “concerned everyday citizens” staged a bunch of “spontaneous” demonstrations and town hall disruptions.

And the health sharks’ ruthlessness and jugular mentality became even more blatant just a few days ago. Two days before the final committee vote on health care reform, the HMOs released a last-minute “report” showing how devastating it would be for every American if the HMOs’ profits were jeopardized.

This was a “report???” How about a “report” from one of those drug cartels, showing the incredible health benefits of shooting heroin at least three times a day.

And you’ve gotta love the timing. It’s exactly the same as those last-minute “hit pieces” that political candidates send out just a day or two before an election. The opponent doesn’t have time to respond, so thousands of voters go to the polls thinking “Oh my God, he raped and murdered his granddaughter and then threw the corpse at his ex-wife?!?!? That does it, I’m voting for his opponent.”

There hasn’t exactly been a Solomon anywhere in this health care debate. But even without one, the health insurers have shown their true colors. They’ve become that infamous mother who didn’t care if the baby was cut in half as long as that other woman couldn’t have him. “It shall be neither mine nor yours—divide it!” screamed the HMOs.

Referring to the HMOs’ last-minute tantrum and pout-fest, Nancy Pelosi said:

“Anyone who had any doubts about the need for such an option need only look at the behavior of the health insurance industry this week. The idea that we would have health insurance reform without a public option becomes less likely. If you are going to mandate that people must buy insurance, why would you throw them into the lion's den of the insurance industry without some leverage with a public option?”

You Go Girl.

Mad Men episode and the “Career Girls” Murder

2009-10-13T21:47:00.000-07:00

I’m old enough to actually remember that prehistoric era portrayed in Mad Men (1963). This program has excellent acting, plot twists, character development — but the best part is that early ‘60s feel. They capture that period so thoroughly, right down to the last detail — you’re THERE. From ten to eleven p.m. on Sunday evenings, the clock gets turned back forty-six years.

American Dreams had that same quality, especially their first season. That program was about an extended family in Philadelphia, also in 1963. (The show ran from 2002 to 2005.)

Both of those shows use hundreds of minute details to portray that era. People’s haircuts/hairstyles, “current” slang and dialogue, clothing styles, homes and furniture, cars (obviously), and brief snippets of TV shows, newscasts and “current” radio hits — it’s like the last 46 years haven’t happened yet.

American Dreams, in particular, made heavy use of then-popular radio hits in the background. Sometimes it would be a minor hit that I hadn’t heard in decades, and I’d be so busy thinking “wait, I remember that, who was that, it was…” that I’d miss some of the dialogue.

In last Sunday’s Mad Men episode, somebody’s car radio was playing a small part of Martin Luther King’s “I Have A Dream” speech that he made during the March on Washington (August ‘63). After a few sentences, the news shifted and there was a brief “and two women in New York’s Upper East Side were found murdered in their apartment.” And then somebody either turned off the radio or changed the station.

But I knew exactly which murder case the radio announcer was talking about. It was all over the news for weeks on end, at least in the Northeast where I was living at the time. I hadn’t thought of that incident in decades, and Id forgotten that it happened on the same day as the March on Washington.

Two “career girls” (when was the last time anybody used that phrase) were stabbed to death in their apartment. Here’s a link to that story.

Can’t wait until next week’s Mad Men episode to see what ancient memories get jarred.

Happy Indigenous People’s Day

2009-10-12T00:34:00.000-07:00

That’s right, Fuck You Christopher Columbus. Gee, let’s name a holiday after an explorer who “discovered” a new continent and murdered millions of its inhabitants. I hate to ask a dumb question, but how in the fuck can a place be “discovered” when millions of people are already living there???

Just wondering.

We haven’t named any national holidays after famous skinheads or Ku Klux Klan leaders (yet). But once a year we roll out the red carpet for the 15th Century’s version of Adolph Hitler.

I first learned about our history — blemishes and all — from this book about ten years ago. And this book has similar information. This is knowledge that every American should have. Sorry folks, but your high school history teacher was so full of shit it was coming out of his/her ears.

And now, for whatever reason, this information has started to “trickle down” (God I hate that expression) to a few public schools here and there. Better late than never.

This can only be a good thing. America’s racist “patriot” community will have a mass tantrum over these commie politically correct history lessons. But the rest of the country — the ones whose IQs are HIGHER than their shoe sizes — are finally heaving a sigh of relief. Every country — every tribe, every region — needs to learn their history as accurately as possible. There’s nothing “negative” or “unpatriotic” about people acknowledging the dark side of their history. There were never any saints; no good guys or bad guys. Nothing is black and white.

Americans have long been appalled that Japan and Germany have kept their own people in the dark about the Rape of Nanking, Pearl Harbor, and the Holocaust (respectively). (These mistakes have been rectified in recent years.) But somehow it’s different when American history textbooks are interchangeable with a John Wayne movie.

So learn everything you can about Christopher Columbus “discovering” America and every other chapter of our history. Like every country, our history has a dark side. How could it not? Ignoring it — or yelling out unprintable insults at people who try to acknowledge this — will not accomplish anything.

As the famous saying goes: “Those who do not remember history are condemned to repeat it.”

South Carolina: Out of the Frying Pan, Into The Fire

2009-10-10T12:09:00.000-07:00

As contemptible and pitiful as Mark Sanford is, he might be replaced by somebody even worse.

This article is about the Far Right’s mass pantytwist over Obama’s Nobel Peace Prize. As you’d expect, it’s the usual spewing of a bunch of dunces who couldn’t find their way out of a one-room apartment. But in a sea of knuckledragging inbreds, one particular mutant stands head and shoulders above the rest.

South Carolina Rep. Gresham Barrett wants to be the next governor. This was his response to Obama’s Nobel Prize (here‘s another link):

“Congratulations to President Obama on his prize. I'm not sure what the international community loved best; his waffling on Afghanistan, pulling defense missiles out of Eastern Europe, turning his back on freedom fighters in Honduras, coddling Castro, siding with Palestinians against Israel, or almost getting tough on Iran. The world may love it, but following in the footsteps of Jimmy Carter is not where America needs to go. Hopefully, this surprise award will give the President cause to reevaluate his current course.”

OK, hold it, back up a minute here. Out of all the retarded spewage in that quotation, one particular mouthful of shit is louder than the rest: “Turning his back on freedom fighters in Honduras…”

What???

Let’s see, a democratically elected president gets overthrown by the army, and that army is now redefined as “freedom fighters???” DUUUHHH!!!

Yes, back in the good old days, Honduras — like most of Central America — was ruled by a rightwing dictatorship, handpicked by the United States to carry out the ideals of Freedom. But those days are gone now, hopefully forever. And it’s time for America’s oligarchs — and the gap-toothed small-forehead eyes-too-close-together simpletons who worship them — to move on.

Public Option, But States Can “Opt Out”

2009-10-08T15:07:00.000-07:00

This just might be a way to get the public option passed by all sixty members of the U.S. Senate. (Oh that’s right, there are forty other senators, but they’re all so busy whining and sobbing and holding their breath ‘til they turn blue — I forgot they were there.)

Some of the worst Blue Dog Democrats are from states where health insurance companies have a large presence. If these senators had integrity and/or a set of cajones, this wouldn’t matter; but you know how that goes…

One Capitol Hill aide said: “What folks are looking for is what gets 60 votes. The opt-out idea is very appealing to people. It has come up in conversations. I know personally that a handful of members have discussed it amongst themselves.”

The opposite approach — Opt In — has been vaguely discussed off and on for several years. But the Opt Out approach would have a lot more momentum. Federal legislation would make a public health insurance option available for everybody; but then each state would have the chance to ~~bend over for the insurance industry~~ opt out of the public option. The opting out would probably be accomplished through a statewide referendum.

Conservatives shouldn’t have any objection to this approach, since after all NOBODY really wants a bunch of socialist bureaucrats standing between themselves and their doctors.

Meanwhile, Republicans are looking over their to-do list.

Arrange a bunch of spontaneous demonstrations and shouting matches at town hall meetings — Check.

Scare the shit out of millions of gullible people with shouts of “Death Panels!” “Mandatory Abortion!” “Communist Fascist Socialist Muslim Born in Kenya!” — Check.

Squeeze campaign money out of doctors by scaring them about “Socialized Medicine!” — Check.

Republicans have spent the last few months calling and faxing thousands of doctors, trying to scare donations out of them. Fortunately doctors are generally less gullible than your Fox News couch potato. This latest Astroturf group — “Physicians' Council for Responsible Reform” — has conned donations out of 5,000 doctors. Who knows how many other doctors told them to stick it.

Dr. Paul Kramer is in that second category. He said he was interested in joining this “grass roots” organization at first, but then realized it was nothing more than “a bald fundraising effort. When I told the woman I wouldn't be interested in making any financial contribution, the call was quickly ended. I want reform and wanted to tell them that not all physicians were interested in seeing this effort tank. I never got the chance.”

What a bunch of sleazy shitbags. With all of their huge efforts at backstabbing, smearing, lying, sabotaging — the only thing the Republicans haven’t done is try to come up with an alternate plan. Nah.

We’ve all probably known somebody who puts a massive gargantuan effort into not having to work. Welfare or unemployment checks (when the person doesn’t qualify), scams, lies, ripoffs, shortchanging people; and always watching their backs and always trying to remember what they said to who. And you just want to say to this person, “wouldn’t it be easier to just go out there and get a job?”

The Republican Party reminds me of that person.

Conservatives: Liberal Bias is Everywhere

2009-10-06T17:03:00.001-07:00

It’s bad enough that the news media is run by a bunch of liberals who want to tear down everything America stands for. But now it turns out things are worse than anyone ever suspected: even the Bible was written by liberals.

Well that explains a few things. It‘s time to set the record straight once and for all.

America was founded by He-Men who KNEW what Jesus really stood for. Manifest Destiny was NOT inspired by some long-haired pansy who drove the moneychangers from the temple and went around lisping about “let he among you who is without sin cast the first stone.”

Liberals wrote all that shit. Two thousand years of socialism and political correctness will be expunged from the Bible.

The Conservative Bible Project is finally going to rectify this terrible prank that's been played on the American people.

The original Bible only contained one passage:

“And if a man lie with mankind, as with womankind, both of them have committed abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.”

With those immortal words of wisdom, what else do you need?

The Republican Health Care Plan

2009-10-04T17:37:00.000-07:00

Finally, a winning slogan for the Democrats. They’ve been on the defensive for too long against the nonstop rightwing blatherings about “Death Panels!” and “Government Takeover!”

And now the Democrats have finally figured it out: all they have to do is ask the Republicans “What’s YOUR health care plan?”

[squirm] [shifty eyes darting every which way]

That’s right, they don’t have one. Zilch. Nada. Zip point shit.

Republicans didn’t waste a minute derailing Bill Clinton’s health care plan in 1995. Since then, the Party of Lynchin’ has had fourteen years — fourteen fuckin’ years! — to come up with a health care plan of their own.

Did they ever come up with a plan? Did they have any alternatives to Clinton’s proposals? Did they ever make any effort whatsoever to deal with the health care crisis?

No, no and no.

Senator Richard Durbin said: “The Grand Old Party's coffers are empty when it comes to health care reform.”

And Obama was dissing Republicans about this while he was talking to a group of union activists: “What's your answer? What's your solution? You know what? They don't have one.”

Now that they’ve finally been called out on it, the Republicans will probably throw together a few sketchy pages of something meaningless, just so they can point to it and go “see, we do too have a plan.”

It’ll be like that time you had all semester to write a term paper but you didn’t start it until the night before it was due.

And speaking of leftwing conspiracies: one of my “favorite” rightwing bloggers had a link to this article. Those wicked Democrats have a foolproof sinister plan for passing “Obamacare,” no matter what it takes.

If only…

The Worst TV Program EVER

2009-10-02T11:21:00.000-07:00

I’ve never been interested in any of those Realty TV shows anyway, but this new program hits a new low. I guess it’s a realty show; technically it’s an infomercial.

Apparently some sickfuck thinks it’s a hilarious idea to take an unfortunate handicapped cerebrally-challenged mutant and sit him down in front of a TV camera so he can sputter and drool and make funny noises for everybody’s amusement.

This is funny???

Here’s a link to a short YouTube excerpt from this program. It’s too sick to watch, but you know you’re going to. Fess up, you’ve got the same morbid curiosity as everybody else. Right? Come on, nobody’s looking — go ahead, click on it.

Pretty sick, huh? Whoever this pathetic Bill Keller is, he needs to be helped — treated! — not paraded in front of a TV camera so a bunch of braindead couch potatoes can sit there and giggle at him.

What sort of depraved depths have we sunk to?

“The Republicans want you to die quickly if you get sick”

2009-09-30T13:29:00.000-07:00

So what else is new? Bravo to Rep. Alan Grayson (D-FL) for telling it like it is; calling a spade a spade. He didn’t exactly tell us anything we didn’t already know, but it sure is fun watching the indignant — shocked! — reaction from the oligarchs and their inbred worshippers.

“If you get sick, America, the Republican health care plan is this: die quickly. That's right. The Republicans want you to die quickly if you get sick.”

Finally, a Democrat who speaks the truth, bluntly, without any sugar coating. I’m glad Obama is smooth-talking and non-confrontational, but somebody out there has to fight fire with fire.

Republicans have been spewing out their intelligence-insulting bullshit for months now. Unfortunately, after decades of education cuts, “intelligence-insulting” and “popular with the masses” are one and the same.

Republicans — at the instruction of their puppetmasters in the health insurance industry — spent the month of August inciting riots at town hall meetings. And we’ve spent months listening to their hysterical blubberings about “Death Panels!” “People dying in the ER waiting room!” “Obama is a fascist-communist-terrorist-socialist Muslim and he was born in Kenya!”

And now when they finally get a taste of their own medicine, they squeal like stuck pigs. Good!

Alan Grayson — come on, don’t hold back. Tell us how you really feel. It needs to be said.

Health Insurance Companies Exempt from Anti-Trust Laws

2009-09-29T12:42:00.000-07:00

Did you know about this? I had no idea until I got an e-mail the other day.

The McCarran-Ferguson Act of 1945 exempts health insurance companies from the federal anti-trust legislation that applies to most other businesses. WTF???

This outdated law (if it was ever “in” date) might finally be corrected. Senator Patrick Leahy and Rep. John Conyers have introduced the Health Insurance Industry Antitrust Enforcement Act — S. 1681 and H.R. 3596 respectively — to break up the health insurance monopoly and force these companies to actually compete. What a concept.

Whether or not they ever have to compete with that commie government option, they’ll at least be competing with each other. For a change.

It’ll be fun to hear those “free enterprise” “market forces” Republicans shouting and squealing against a bill that promotes competition. And you know they will.

If you’re ready to break up the health insurance monopoly, tell your senators and your congressional representative. Enough is enough.

Pope: “Bring Europe Home to Jesus”

2009-09-27T16:12:00.000-07:00

Jesus would be turning in His grave if He could see what’s happened to His beloved continent. Europe was once a paradise teeming with Godfearing Christians. But now it’s deteriorated into a hopeless den of iniquity, overrun with every sort of degenerate filth — atheists, Muslims, pagans, socialists, you name it.

And now, finally, Pope Benedict is speaking out. During a speech in Brno, Czech Republic, the Pope gave a stern lecture to a continent full of sinners:

“Man needs to be liberated from material oppressions, but more profoundly, he must be saved from the evils that afflict the spirit…As Europe listens to the story of Christianity, she hears her own. Her notions of justice, freedom and social responsibility, together with the
cultural and legal institutions established to preserve these ideas and hand them on to future generations, are shaped by her Christian inheritance.”

He also said Europe’s religious roots “supply the continent with the spiritual and moral sustenance that allows her to enter into meaningful dialogue with people from other cultures and religions…Maintain the spiritual patrimony inherited from your forebears ... guard it and make it answer to the needs of the present day.”

Amen.

Financial Product Safety Commission

2009-09-25T19:37:00.000-07:00

Those poor Republicans. No matter how hysterical they get, no matter how much they shriek and shout (don’t those spewfucks ever get laryngitis?), there’s always something else to get their panties in a wad. There’s always another threat to The America They Grew Up In.

Republicans already have their hands full battling Socialized Medicine and that treehugging energy legislation that Obama is pushing. And now their latest hissy fit: the proposed Financial Product Safety Commission.

This article was written by Bob Sullivan, author of Gotcha Capitalism.

This will be the first new federal consumer protection agency since the 1930s. The Financial Product Safety Commission will take over some of the jobs that existing agencies have been neglecting. The FDIC, Federal Reserve, Comptroller of the Currency, Office of Thrift Supervision, Federal Trade Commission and National Credit Union Administration will all have some of their responsibility and authority transferred to this new agency.

Gail Hillebrand of Consumers Union said consumer protection has been split among all of those agencies, and each one has passed the buck to somebody else. “It's a reflection of the degree to which those folks haven't done the job. Consumer protection is too important to be the orphan in the regulatory system. It has been everybody's last priority.”

Barney Frank and Christopher Dodd will be introducing legislation in the House and Senate respectively. This agency will have the power to:

Review new contracts (e.g. credit card terms of service agreements) and demand that these contracts be clearly written;

Require banks to store and share information that would help consumers compare terms and conditions;

Issue subpoenas to examine bank records when a complaint is being investigated;

Allow state governments to enact even tougher consumer protection laws; and

Extract fines — anywhere from a thousand to a million dollars per day — against banks who violate these rules.

Works for me.

Needless to say, the banking industry and the U.S. Chamber of Commerce are drawing up their battle plans. They’ve instructed their prostitutes in Congress to bend over and gyrate like they’ve never gyrated before, and they’re preparing a ton of sleazy TV commercials.

Since the health insurance lobby has had so much success with their phony “grassroots” organizations, maybe the banking industry will try the same thing. Get ready for some more of those spontaneous demonstrations. Millions of everyday Americans will suddenly fly into a rage at the thought of “Socialized Banking!” “Keep those bumbling government bureaucrats out of MY bank account!”

Original Draft of Sarah Palin’s Hong Kong Speech

2009-09-23T10:32:00.000-07:00

Nobody will say exactly how many speechwriters and proofreaders are employed by Sarah Palin’s staff. But here is a copy of Sarah’s first draft of her speech:

Ah jeez, here I am in Hong Kong, gosh, the other side of the world, talking to a group of international investors. Or for you people, that would be “intelnationar investols,” heeheeheehee.

This is just so great, this historic meeting of Main Street USA and the Far East. Sort of Joe Sixpack meets, uh, you know, Chow Fu, or whatever your version would be. All these gun-hating Democrats are saying I don’t have any foreign policy experience, but look where I am right now. So there. And I bet they’ve never even been to Japan. Er, China.

Thank God there aren’t any reporters here to misquote me. Those people drove me out of office by twisting everything I say. All they ever do is mock me and make fun of my sin tax.

Now, I heard you’re having ethnic problems with those Weegers or whatever you call them. I don’t want to tell you how to run your country, but in Alaska we like to shoot wolves from helicopters. Couldn’t you just fly a few helicopters over that place where those Weegers live and, you know, I’m just saying…

I know you like having a big centralized government that runs everything and meddles in everyone’s lives. That’s fine for you people, but now America has started doing the same thing, this big smothering government barging into everything and telling hardworking Americans what to do. Joe and Jane Sixpack are not happy about this. We have a president who was born in some filthy third world country even more primitive than this one, and he’s ruining America. I always tell people, why don’t you just move to Russia or China if you want some big giant godless nanny police state sapping your ambition. When Ronald Reagan was president, darn it that’s when America was her greatest. He took away that nanny state and made everyone free to pull their own bootstraps. And he knew in his heart that America was Number One and he didn’t care what the rest of the world thought of us, and he didn’t blink and cringe and run away every time some third world tinpot…

[Note to self, last paragraph still needs work]