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5 Scientific Reasons Men (Pretty Much) Never Say 'I'm Sorry'

Todd Reed — Wed, 15 Sep 2021 21:30:04 GMT

Your man messed up, and you're waiting for an apology so the two of you can kiss, make up, and move on. Well, don't hold your breath.

Studies confirm what women have long known: men have trouble spitting out the "S" word.

What's so important about saying, "I'm sorry"? Apologies have the amazing power to validate feelings, heal rifts, diminish stress in a relationship, eliminate grudges, and generate forgiveness.

So why, with this boatload of benefits, are men so reluctant to say, "I'm sorry" and learn how to apologize the right way?

Science says it's definitely a gender thing.

Here are 5 reasons your boyfriend or husband (pretty much) never apologizes.

1. He doesn't think he owes you an apology.

A pair of studies conducted at the University of Waterloo in Ontario found that it's not so much that men are reluctant to admit wrongdoing. It's just that guys have a "higher threshold" for what situations warrant an apology.

In other words, his definition of "bad" or "offensive" behaviors drastically differs from yours.

2. He doesn't view apologies the same way you do.

Nope, not even close. Women have a tendency to apologize for everything.

Ever catch yourself saying, "I'm so sorry" to someone who's going through a difficult situation that has nothing to do with you? You do this naturally as a way to connect with others and to maintain healthy relationships.

But then you wonder why the men you love have difficulty doing the same. The answer is simple: men think it's dumb to apologize for anything that's not their fault.

3. Apologizing makes him feel weak and incompetent.

Divorce mediator Sam Margulies, Ph.D. believes that one reason guys are apology-impaired is that admitting wrongdoing pushes them way out of their comfort zone.

"Men tend to view apologies as humiliating and a loss of face," he explains. "For a man to acknowledge that he has done something wrong often means he feels diminished in the eyes of those who hear the apology."

That holds true particularly for the women they love and to whom they prefer to perceive them as "heroes." Nevermind that his failure to apologize communicates just the opposite to you — that his pride is more important to him than your feelings, and that if he has to choose who's left feeling bad, he picks you.

Ouch! Not so brave, courageous, and admirable behavior, is it?

4. He's carrying emotional baggage about apologizing.

Harriet Lerner, Ph.D., author of "Marriage Rules", points out that when growing up, some guys feel forced to "man up" and apologize so often to their siblings (or whoever) for minor infractions, that their solution as adults is to never say they're sorry again.

Or, maybe your partner had a bad experience in a past relationship where asking for forgiveness repeatedly led to confrontation instead of an accepted apology.

5. He believes actions speak louder than words.

He brings you flowers, does the dishes, or texts you at work just to say, "Hi," and that he's thinking of you. These are signs your man is offering a silent apology. He's trying to make it up to you but may have trouble expressing his feelings verbally.

Regardless of why your man won't apologize, the fact is you're hurt and can't help but wonder, "How can my partner love me if he isn't willing to acknowledge that he's wrong and say he's sorry?"

How can you get him to apologize and stop hurting you in this way?

These tips might help bring him around.

What To Do If Your Husband Or Boyfriend Won't Apologize

1. Clue him in.

Don't let yourself fester over something offensive your partner has done. Remember, he might not see the situation as apology-worthy or the same way you do.

So, instead of assuming he can read your mind or your emotions accurately, tell him exactly what happened, how you feel about it, and that you would really appreciate an apology. Then, hope for the best.

2. Don't demand an apology.

Dragging an apology out of someone who isn't willing to cough one up will just lead to more frustration and resentment.

What's more, you could end up feeling even more sorry you tried to squeeze an apology out of him. If it's not heartfelt, it's just not worth it.

3. When he does say he's sorry, accept his apology graciously.

Don't nag. Don't confront. Don't make him grovel. If you try to use this opportunity to teach him a lesson, you may never hear "I'm sorry" again.

Your best response is two simple words: "Apology accepted," followed by a hug. Once your man sees how much you appreciate the gesture, he's more likely to apologize again and again.

More for You on YourTango:

Coach Todd Reed, CPC, has expertise in communication and relationships. His book, Conversation is Sexy, offers tips, tools, and techniques for couples to discover the joys of being in love.

5 Signs Your Emotional Baggage Is Sabotaging Your Relationship

Steph Auteri — Wed, 15 Sep 2021 13:30:03 GMT

Though you've now been told for about the 37th time that "It's not you, it's me," we're thinking it's time to consider the fact that it might, in fact, be you.

And no, we're not insinuating that he broke up with you because of the way your hair frizzes up in the summer, or because you're always leaving Cheez-it crumbs in the bed, or even because you sexted his mom by accident.

No. What's really weighing you down, and effing up your love life, is all that emotional baggage.

Trust us. We've been there. And no, we're not projecting.

Here are five signs you have emotional baggage and how carrying it over into your relationship may end in a breakup.

1. You project your insecurities.

Those who have emotional baggage can oftentimes be riddled with self-doubt. What makes this self-doubt even worse is that, as you see the worst in yourself, you also begin assuming the same of others.

If, for example, you're on a first date and feeling wary and quick to judge, you might automatically assume that your date is judging you just as harshly. This, in turn, could make you defensive. Way to kill the buzz before you've even shared your first toast, right?

If you're experiencing negative feelings about the person you're with, ask yourself where these feelings are coming from. Could it be that you're making unfounded assumptions?

2. You're paranoid.

We don't blame you for being a bit suspicious about infidelity, especially if you've been burned in the past. But in order for a relationship to work, you have to trust each other.

If you don't fully trust him — or even if you do and are just being cautious — your paranoia can manifest itself in some extremely unattractive ways: clinginess, neediness, and breaches in privacy. (No, we don't condone e-snooping of any kind.)

No man (or woman, for that matter) wants to feel as if he's under constant surveillance, especially if he did absolutely nothing to betray your trust. So keep your suspicions in check, unless he's done something that's actually worth worrying about.

3. You compare him to past lovers.

This goes beyond simple paranoia. It's more subtle and insidious. If you see him smile in a certain way or utter a certain phrase, and you immediately think of your abusive ex-boyfriend or that immature idiot you rebounded with or that unfortunate one-night stand, you're letting your past drag you unnecessarily down.

Do you consistently find yourself souring on new dating prospects simply because of unfortunate similarities? It's important to remind yourself that he is not your ex. Try thinking, instead, of all the amazing qualities he has that your ex most certainly did not.

4. You hide things from him.

We've written in the past about the secrets healthy couples shouldn't keep. This is because, in order to fully commit to each other, you should also know each other pretty darn well. Holding back on emotions or reliving painful events from the past in ways that affect your present can keep a relationship stagnant.

So ask yourself: what have you been keeping from him, and why? Chances are, he can tell you're hiding something, and we're sure he'd rather hear about it than be stonewalled.

5. You won't fully commit.

So, commitment-phobes are everywhere, and some of them aren't carrying an ounce of baggage. But in many cases, the fear of tying oneself down can be indicative of a deeper problem. If you're not giving any of your relationships half a chance, it's time to do some soul-searching.

There's nothing wrong with being single, but is it what you really want? And if it's not, what's making you hesitate when you come across the possibility of love? If all else fails, consider talking to a therapist or a love/dating coach about burning that persnickety baggage.

In the end, it all comes down to trust. Want to leave that baggage behind? Allow yourself to trust again.

More for You on YourTango:

Steph Auteri is a freelance writer and editor who has written about her sex life in Playgirl, Time Out New York, American Curves, New York Press, Nerve, and other publications. Follow her on Twitter.

What is 420 Friendly? What It Means on a Dating Profile & More Terms

Team LovePanky — Tue, 14 Sep 2021 07:58:00 GMT

Dating profiles are full of confusing abbreviations if you’re not online dating savvy. 420 Friendly is one you may run into. What does 420 friendly mean?

The modern world of dating is often full of confusion. It’s enough to make you wonder whether it’s even worth it! You see people online you might actually get along with but you just can’t decipher their bio. Maybe they’d be perfect for you but if you don’t know what 420 friendly means and it’s listed on their profile, how do you know for sure?

This is a common snippet a lot of people post on their profiles in order to connect with the right types of people. However, not everyone who is 420 friendly will know what it means!

You could argue that if people are going to use abbreviations, there should be some kind of list to help you decipher it. It’s very easy to miss out on someone who could be your true love if you’re simply not sure what certain things mean.

You could easily pass them over because you’re too embarrassed to ask. To help you out, let’s look at what is 420 friendly, so you never have to wonder again!

[Read: Should you try online dating? The guide to decide if it’s for you]

What is 420 friendly and where did it originate from?

To simplify it, 420 friendly is basically about smoking weed, or marijuana to give its real name. When someone says they’re 420 friendly, that means they’re fine with it, and that they probably do it themselves too *although not always*.

To delve deeper, we have to understand where this phrase originates. Although there are many theories out there, 420 actually originated as a code word. Students in California weren’t allowed to smoke during school, *obviously!* which meant they had to wait until afterward. [Read: Smoking and sex: Horrible ways smoking can ruin your sex life]

This time, 4:20 in the afternoon, is when their friends would get together and smoke marijuana.

After a while, they would all reference 420 while talking to each other in the open, using it as a code word. At first, they would use it to basically ask if they looked high or even if someone had any marijuana.

Then it was used as a means of communicating the fact that marijuana was present. So, to sum up, what does 420 friendly mean? It means that someone either smokes or doesn’t mind marijuana. [Read: 50 questions to check if someone’s right for you]

What does 420 mean on a dating profile?

While online dating, you’ll stumble across all types of people and bios. You may find that at the end of a few of these, the person will write “420 friendly” at the end of the bio. This means just as it states. That person is tolerant or even smokes marijuana.

That’s not to say that they require that of a person, but rather, they want to make sure the person they connect with knows and is okay with it.

Otherwise, it’s possible that they’ll start talking to someone and find they really like them, only to disclose their smoking habit and find that person is completely against it. They could also meet someone they really like and find that they smoke. They want that person to know that it’s not an issue for them.

Does that mean that if you don’t see 420 friendly that they’re not okay with it? Not at all. Not everyone thinks to use the common abbreviations on their dating profile.

You’re reading this because you wanted to know what is 420 friendly, so it’s probable that lots of other people out there don’t know enough to put it in their bio! If you don’t see it and it’s something that’s important to you, it’s a conversation you’ll need to have with that person.

[Read: 30 best and worst ways to describe yourself online]

Why do people need to announce that they’re 420 friendly?

It might be a silly thing to think about. Why would someone basically announce they smoke marijuana or use it in any way? It’s not exactly something you should advertise but it’s particularly important for a few reasons.

1. It’s illegal in most places

There aren’t many places where smoking and using marijuana is legal. Even though it’s becoming more and more widely accepted, there are still governments making it illegal everywhere.

It’s understandable some people aren’t going to be too thrilled by the idea of someone close to them smoking marijuana. It’s illegal. They might not want to get caught up in any legal trouble if it comes to that. [Read: How to find the right person for you when you’ve given up hope]

2. Not everyone likes being high

There are some people who just don’t like it. Not that they have anything against it. It’s more like they just don’t enjoy being high and would rather not be around someone who could get them secondhand high.

They might not want to get involved with someone who makes it a regular occurrence. That means they’d want to know upfront if someone actually smoked or not. [Read: 30 really fun ways to have fun with friends and beat the boredom]

3. It doesn’t smell the greatest

Those who know what weed smells like knows it’s a very strong scent. It’s not something a person can just get used to if they’re around it enough.

Some people really hate the smell. If someone knows they can’t stand the smell, even if they don’t have anything else against it, they might not want to date a person who smokes it.

4. Some people are strongly opposed to it

There are also some people who have everything against it. They hate it. Obviously, if that’s the case, they won’t want to be involved with someone who smokes or is 420 friendly. To them, it’s this horrible thing they’d rather avoid altogether. [Read: Top 15 worst habits that women hate in men]

Other ways to tell if someone is 420 friendly

So, what if there is no mention of it on their bio and you’re really not sure how to have that conversation with them? If you want to know if someone is okay with marijuana and even if they themselves smoke, here are a few other ways you can figure it out.

1. They’re clearly high

This is pretty obvious. If you’re talking to someone and they tell you they’re high, then they probably smoke. Obviously, “high” is a very general term and could be used to describe being intoxicated via many different substances but marijuana is a common one.

You can even tell if someone is high just by the way they act. If they’re a little distracted and aren’t making perfect sense while messaging or talking, they could be intoxicated.

People who are 420 friendly and high also laugh a bit more than others. [Read: Top 15 worst habits that women hate in men]

2. They look high to you, but you’re not 100% sure

If you end up on video chat or even in person, you can tell when someone’s high. Their eyes will be a little red and glossed over. They’ll also just look a little distant and not all present. This can change, however, depending on the person.

Don’t just take their looks into account to tell if they’re 420 friendly. It’s simply a point to bear in mind and use to delve a little deeper.

3. They carry a faint smell of marijuana

This is pretty obvious. Marijuana smell is very strong and very distinct. If they smell like it, they’re probably 420 friendly. And they also probably don’t care who knows it if they’re walking around smelling so strongly like an illegal substance.

4. They look like they’re smoking something in their pictures

If you’re on an online dating app and you see pictures of them smoking, then chances are they’re 420 friendly. However, they could be smoking a cigarette so you do have to be careful. Don’t just assume that because someone is smoking something that they’re 420 friendly.

5. They’re with others clearly smoking in their pictures

They could just be around other people smoking in their pictures too. Again, it could be cigarettes but you can tell the difference between a neatly rolled factory-manufactured cigarette and a handmade joint.

And if someone is smoking from a glass pipe, it’s almost always marijuana. This might not mean that they’re smoking specifically, but they’re probably okay with others smoking around them at the very least.

Other common dating profile abbreviations

There are so many abbreviations you may come across that it’s impossible to list them all. However, now you know what does 420 friendly mean, you might be interested to learn a few other common abbreviations too.

Below you’ll find a selection of the more common ones. Do remember however, the world of online dating is constantly changing, so who knows what new abbreviation will arrive next week!

[Read: How to know if online dating is right for you]

1. WLTM – Would like to meet

This is a very common one and if you don’t know what it means, it could throw you for a loop! Basically, you’ll see someone say ‘WLTM a person for travels’ or ‘WLTM a person with a fun sense of humor’. It could be anything but it’s an easy abbreviation to work out.

2. GSOH – Good sense of humor

You’ve probably heard this one before. If someone says that they want to meet someone with a GSOH, they want to meet someone who will make them laugh and they can have fun with. That’s you, right? [Read: 12 types of humor and how it affects relationships]

3. Solvent

This isn’t really an abbreviation but a word you will see often and probably want to know what it means. Solvent can be used in a couple of different ways but it’s normally that the person wants to meet someone who can pay their own way. Basically, no gold diggers or freeloaders, please!

4. FWB – Friend with benefits

This person wants to meet someone to have some cheeky fun with but no commitment. If that’s what you’re after, fair enough, but if you’re looking for someone to have a long relationship with, you’re probably better off passing on this one. [Read: How to start a friends with benefits relationship]

5. AL – Animal lover

Aww, this person loves animals and wants to meet someone who loves them just as much as they do. It’s likely that they have pets and they want to meet someone who isn’t going to be adverse to their big, loving dog jumping all over them.

6. BB – Body builder

If you see ‘BB’ it means that they’re either looking for someone who is into body building or they’re a body builder themselves. It’s probably that they just want to meet someone with the same interests as them but perhaps that’s not a deal breaker. You’ll have to ask!

7. D – Divorced

This one is pretty obvious but in the world of abbreviations, it’s easy to become confused! Now you know what does 420 friendly mean, you can now add D to the list, because it means they’re divorced. They may be looking for another divorced person or they’re just letting you know their status. [Read: Dating after divorce: 10 must-do’s for stress free dating]

8. FSF/FSM – Female seeking female/Female seeking male

These two basically tell you who the person is and what they’re looking for. In this case, it’s a woman who is looking for either a woman or a man, depending upon which one she chooses. Of course, there is a male version of this too – MSF or MSM.

9. LD – Light drinker

They’re just letting you know that they enjoy a drink every so often, but nothing heavy. Or, they’re looking for someone who only drinks a little and doesn’t binge at the weekends. [Read: True sex talk: Alcohol’s effects on sex and your libido]

10. MBA – Married but available

If you see this one, proceed with caution! It could be that they’re married but separated in which case, no problem. However, it could be that they’re married but still looking for something on the side. Not okay.

11. NS – Non smoker

They’re looking for someone who doesn’t smoke, and it’s likely to be because they don’t smoke either.

[Read: 17 new dating app terms that you MUST know if you’re looking online]

Knowing what 420 friendly means can come in handy a lot more than you may think, along with other abbreviations. The next time you see this on a dating profile, you’ll know whether or not that person is for you.

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The 30 Unspoken Guy Code Rules All Men Need to Know And Follow

Team LovePanky — Mon, 13 Sep 2021 10:37:00 GMT

Observing the necessary guy code rules is what strengthens guy friendships and makes this bond unbreakable. It’s like the bro code – you can’t break it.

Let’s just get this out of the way—if you’ve notoriously broken the guy code rules, then the assumption is you probably don’t have a lot of friends. The guy code is sacred. You can’t break it, against all odds. It might sound foolish to you, but there are just certain rules you can’t break.

This code was created for all men to follow. *it’s an unspoken oath each male baby takes upon leaving the womb*

It’s also the reason why some male friendships fall apart and never speak for the rest of eternity.

If you break even just one of the guy code rules, it really does reflect on not just your friendship skills, but your loyalty and integrity.

[Read: The 20 qualities in a guy that make him a really good man]

What makes the guy code rules so sacred?

The guy code rules gives you a proper idea on how to maintain guy friendships with your bros. There are certain lines you can cross, and lines you can’t. In a sense, this is the guys’ definition of setting firm boundaries.

Whether it’s getting together with your friend’s ex or something as silly as bets, it’s important to observe all these rules. Your ability to maintain friendships for the rest of eternity relies on keeping these rules.

If you break one, you can expect all your friends to either be mad at you, resent you, or even hate you. Yes, it’s that crucial.

[Read: The 60 bromandments: Bro code rules every guy should live by]

The guy code rules you need to know

If you didn’t know before, now you know. Here are the 30 rules of guy code that can never be broken.

1. Your friend’s sister is off limits

This is one of the guy code rules that should be obvious by now. No matter how attractive she is, if things go bad between the two of you, your friend will be forced to take the side of his sister. Family is family. There’s absolutely no loophole with this *unless you plan on marrying her*.

If you end up breaking her heart or doing something unfathomable, it’s friendship over. This isn’t something you want to experience first-hand, so better leave your friend’s sister alone. [Read: How to forget about a girl: 15 ways to forget she even exists]

2. If your friend’s girlfriend asks you any questions, you deny knowing anything

You don’t know where he is, what he said, where he went. Not only is this backing your friend, this is also saving yourself from scrutiny. Even if you do know, pretend you’re completely ignorant to the situation. When push comes to shove, your loyalty should lie with your friend.

3. You must greet your friend appropriately

A hug cannot come before a handshake, it must be accompanied with a pat on the back. If you observe guy friendships in movies, there’s a reason why there’s always handshakes or a pat in the back.

4. You must inform him if he is dressed horribly

If your friend is wearing a neon green polo with pink shoes, you are obligated to tell him he looks horrible. Honesty is the best policy in cases of his attire.

Especially when his dating life depends on it, tell him when he’s dressing horribly. Unless you’re also wearing the same outfit, then rock it together. [Read: How to dress to impress a girl & get more than just a second glance]

5. Avoid uncomfortable urinal confrontations

A man shall not take the urinal beside another man. You must leave at least one empty urinal in between each other. Even if you’re both men, respect your personal space and boundaries with one another.

6. Unless your friend murdered someone, you bail them out of jail

You go to the bank, collect all your pennies and hand them over to the police. He’ll pay you back, don’t worry. One of the things about guy code rules is that your friendship is ride-or-die. If something happens to them, you need to have their back at all costs.

7. If your drunk friend is about to cheat on his girlfriend, you must follow through with one intervention

Make him aware of the choice he is about to make. If he replies with “f*ck you,” then you are free from any responsibility from that time onward.

The burden is no longer on your shoulders or the consequences of him cheating on his girlfriend. You’re also not obligated to listen to his rants about his choices on that matter. [Read: To cheat or not to cheat? A guide to make up your mind]

8. Never speak about it again rule

If you accidentally graze or touch another man below the waist, it’s already agreed upon as an accident and there will be no mention of it ever.

There’s no need to make it a big deal so it’s best to not mention what happened again *unless you want to make things even more awkward*. [Read: 10 things to do to become manlier, but not aggressive]

9. A bet is a bet

If a bet is made, no matter what, the loser must follow through with his obligations to carry out his side of the bet. Don’t be a lame friend in this aspect, but follow through with the bet.

This includes embarrassing acts or monetary compensation. If he refuses to pay or carry out the duties, you must settle upon an agreement.

10. Wingman duties

If you have a girlfriend and go out to the club with your friends, you are automatically given the job as wingman. Do your best to support them in finding a girl. Whether that’s introducing them to other girls, using the smoothest lines to introduce them, or something along those lines.

From there on out, you must support your friends until they achieve their ultimate goal, whatever that may be *as long as it’s consensual*. [Read: How to choose the perfect wingman while meeting women]

11. Speedos are out

Unless you are Michael Phelps, you are prohibited from wearing a speedo. You probably don’t live under a rock to know that this isn’t the most attractive thing, especially for the ladies. This is the 21st century we live in, and Speedos are definitely not a thing anymore.

12. Respect another man’s boundary

Every guy has his own personal line. Understand where their line is and don’t pass that line. Boundaries are everything when following these guy code rules.

Everything in this list is all about boundaries, so respect them with everything you’ve got. [Read: How to set personal boundaries & guide other people to respect it]

13. Internet buffer

If something tragic happens to your friend, one of the first things you must do is delete their browser history. Protect their privacy at all costs – that’s what friendship means in the world of guy codes.

14. Don’t brag about how many girls you’ve slept with

This might come as a shock to some of you, but the basis of guy friendships isn’t about boasting how many girls you’ve slept with. Sure, it’s probably an impressive number, but no one cares and you look like an asshole. Don’t be that asshole. You don’t need to shoot off your ego when talking to your guy friends.

15. Pranking your friends is seen as bonding

If you decide to engage in pranking, make sure these three things will not happen: Result in a trip to the ER, with you stealing their phone, or in you or him being in financial debt.

Pranks are always fun, but there’s a fine line in knowing when to stop. Make sure it doesn’t cost their health, finances, or anything significant.

16. Don’t ditch your friends for a girl

Unless, this is the girl you’ve been talking about for weeks and everyone is aware of how badly you want her. Bros before hoes, as the sexist saying goes. She may not be a side chick, but still, you need to know the value of friendship.

If you have plans or when it comes to choosing sides, you know where your loyalty lies – your friends.

That is, unless of course, you’re really in love with this girl or you’re in a serious relationship with her, in which case your friends should know that she and your relationship with her comes first. [Read: 17 bad friends you should weed out of your life]

17. Don’t let your friend drive home wasted

Dish out the money for a cab, and hand him the receipt the next morning. Safety should be your priority when you’re dealing with a drunk guy friend.

If he’s intoxicated, don’t let him drive no matter what, even if he insists on doing so. If something terrible happens to him while driving, that burden’s on you.

18. Back up your friend

If your friend gets into a fight and you’re unable to calm the situation, back your friend. Even if he’s wrong and an idiot, he’s your idiot.

Loyalty is an integral part of the guy code rules, so you need to always have their back. If you don’t, maybe you shouldn’t be hanging out with this person in the first place.

19. Don’t give another man advice on working out unless he asks you

He realizes he has small arms, he has a mirror. Giving out unsolicited advice makes you sound like an asshole. You’re entitled to have your own opinions and comments, but ultimately, it’s their body. If they’re happy with the way they look or don’t care about working out, let them.

20. Best man, best stripper

If given the title of best man at your friend’s wedding, you’re entitled with the duty of preparing the bachelor party. Regardless of what he insists *assuming that his values and beliefs don’t contradict*, it is your duty to provide him with the best stripper, or the wildest act of the night. [Read: How to politely decline being the best man]

21. You must own at least one suit

This can be worn to weddings, funerals, graduations, special dates. Plus, you’ll look smart. If you don’t own even a single suit in your wardrobe, then you’re completely missing out!

22. If you ask a girl out on a date, you pay

It’s proper first date etiquette that when you ask her on a date, you’re supposed to pay. Otherwise, if you don’t have the money, you shouldn’t have asked her in the first place. On the other hand, if it was a mutual decision to go out on a date, feel free to go dutch if you want to. [Read: The man code: The most important rules of a gentleman]

23. Don’t date your friend’s exes or flings

It doesn’t matter if they dated for long or not, or if they were serious or not. You cannot, at all costs, date your friend’s exes or flings. You’ll sabotage your friendship entirely by even attempting to do so. You need to respect their past relationships by never getting together with any of them.

24. If your friend asks what you think of his new girl, be honest

In most cases, friendships are all about honesty. If he asks your opinion on his new date or this girl he likes, you need to be frank with him.

There’s no reason why you should pretend to like her if you think otherwise. What if they do end up dating? Then you’ll have to pretend to like her forever!

He’s asking you as his friend because he truly values your opinion as his bro, simple as that.

25. Never make your friend feel ashamed

No matter what sexual activity he participated in, even if he made out with someone unusual or he did something you’d never personally do, you shouldn’t ever judge or criticize him for it. Don’t make him feel ashamed for doing it, whether drunk or sober. [Read: The grossest sex acts you probably didn’t know existed]

26. Friends buy the beer

If a friend is lacking in cash in the middle of a round of drinks, you shouldn’t hesitate to cover for him. Money is just money, but you can’t have another iconic experience with the guys. Don’t hesitate to pitch in when a friend is in need, as they should for you too.

27. Never ignore fist-bumps

It’s not just a gesture in the guy code rules, but it’s a way of showing your friendship and loyalty to other bros. When a friend raises their hand to fist-bump you, don’t leave them hanging!

28. Celebrate your bromance

There’s no reason to be ashamed of your strong bond or your bromance. It’s a reflection of how close your friendship is, so celebrate it without hesitation! If someone judges this or says you’re being immature, screw their opinion. [Read: What makes a good friend: The art of honing your friendship skills]

29. Help them with the ladies

No matter how experienced your friend may be with the ladies, you should always do your best as his bro to give the best advice, be the best wingman, and support your friend in every way you can. This is one of the unspoken guy code rules you should never ignore. Why wouldn’t you help your best buddy? Are you jealous?

30. Don’t allow your friend to drunk text or call

It doesn’t matter if she’s an ex, fling, one-night stand, or whatever. Don’t let your bro make the stupid mistake of drunk dialing or texting a girl if you think he’d regret it in the morning. It’s your obligation as his friend to avoid letting him do this. *grab his phone if you have to!*

[Read: Drunk texting: How to avoid the awkward drama of drunk texts]

So, what are the guy code rules?

The guy code rules exist for a reason and they’re very much valid. Don’t forget to follow every one of these if you want to keep the friendship alive and strong with your bros. After all, these rules are all about loyalty, honesty, and boundaries.

[Read: How to be a man the way he really should be]

These guy code rules are everything you should follow in keeping your friendships strong. Observe these at all costs and always have their back, no matter what.

Liked what you just read? Follow us on Instagram Facebook Twitter Pinterest and we promise, we’ll be your lucky charm to a beautiful love life.

4 Ways to Touch a Man to Build INSTANT Attraction

Adam Lodolce — Sun, 12 Sep 2021 14:00:05 GMT

HOLD on a second, I know where your mind went before you even got here, but I’m not talking about that kind of touching.

I’m talking about the kind of subtle touch that is less sexual and more intriguing.

Because gettin’ sexy is easy. It requires much more creativity and willpower to build that attraction slowly over time rather than jumping into the bedroom on date numero uno.

And if there’s a man out there you’re attracted to, and you want to communicate that to him in a low-key way, subtle touch is the right way to go. Because touching a guy in one of these ways doesn’t require you to put yourself out there that much.

So what if he’s not feeling it? You’ve not crossed a line or embarrassed yourself in any way.

But let me tell you, back when I was dating, if a woman touched me like this and I was into her too, sparks would instantly fly between us.

So let’s get right to it. Here are 4 places that men LOVE to be touched.

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When it comes to flirting, less is waaaaay more. So don’t go crazy and take the touching too far. If it feels right in the moment, go for it. But keep it subtle. If you need to practice, practice on yourself in the mirror.

I promise you, if your fingers linger just a second or two longer than they should, he’ll quickly get the picture.

What are some of the ways you love to be touched by a man you’re attracted to?

Tell me all in the comments below.

Your Coach,

PS. If you’re ready to start making men pursue you for love, then join me on this free webinar to discover the 3 steps to building emotional attraction – Register here to get started (it’s 100% free).

When a Guy Doesn’t Want to Sleep with You: 21 Reasons Why

Team LovePanky — Sun, 12 Sep 2021 07:34:00 GMT

We think men are sex machines that will hump anything that walks, but it’s not true. There are valid reasons for when a guy doesn’t want to sleep with you.

Most women develop their self-esteem based on how desirable they are to men and other women. It’s really sad, but true. It’s a normal thing to wonder about the reasons when a guy doesn’t want to sleep with you.

It can make you question everything regarding your self-worth, especially if you believe sex to be a reflection of who you are.

This concept is really dangerous, because when someone doesn’t show interest, we automatically point the finger at ourselves. Am I not pretty enough? Do I need to lose weight? What did I say wrong?

However, men aren’t that obsessed with sex as society wants us to believe.

It might come as a shock to you, but they don’t always want to have sex with the next person they lay eyes on. It’s not always because you’re not attractive enough, but it can also be a reflection of their own insecurities and doubts.

[Read: 22 must-know signs to know if a guy enjoys having sex with you]

When does a guy not want to sleep with you?

We’re led to believe that guys always want to have sex, but sometimes they’re just not in the mood. Maybe he doesn’t have feelings for you, maybe he got bored, maybe he doesn’t want to lead you on, or maybe he’s going through something.

Figuring out when a guy doesn’t want to sleep with you versus when he does can be about them, but it can also be about you. There are guys who don’t have sex with women they’re not dating and there are guys who stop having sex when they get bored of the act.

[Read: How to tell a guy you’re ready to sleep with him without sounding slutty]

First things first – Does he want to take things slow?

If you’ve just started seeing each other, or you’re still in the talking stage, you’re probably wondering why this guy isn’t trying to get into your pants. Maybe he’s shy and awkward. Or maybe he really likes you, and doesn’t want to blow his chances by trying to slide himself on top of you.

If this is the case, this is a good thing!

It clearly shows he’s serious about you, and is definitely interested in something long term with you, at least for now. Any guy who tries to hook up with you in a date or two may like you, but he doesn’t mind losing you if you decline his advances or take offence.

But a guy who takes it painfully slow, now he’s someone who is way more interested in dating you instead of just sleeping with you. [Read: 18 signs a man is emotionally attached to you and wants to get closer]

So now that we got that out of the way, let’s take a look at the most common reasons why guys do this. After all, assuming it’s only because he’s a nice guy and wants to take things slow without prodding deeper into the reasons is a bit naive, don’t you think?

21 reasons why: when a guy doesn’t want to sleep with you

Everyone has different tastes when it comes to who they’re attracted to. One guy may want to sleep with you without a second of a doubt, and another may want nothing to do with you. It doesn’t mean you’re ugly, but we all just have different preferences and tastes. [Read: These quick clues will answer – Is he attracted to me or not?]

Let’s take a look at the most common reasons why a guy doesn’t want to sleep with you. Again, it doesn’t mean something’s wrong with you, but it’s all a matter of preference, and his own thoughts.

After all, not all men only want one thing.

1. He simply doesn’t want to have sex with you

Maybe he’s not in the mood; but probably he doesn’t find you attractive, the point is he doesn’t want to have sex with you. It’s really as simple as he doesn’t want to. Maybe he’s the type of guy who only sleeps with someone he feels an intense connection with.

We know you expect all men to be obsessed with sex and it doesn’t matter who the woman is, but that’s not always how it goes. [Read: Is he just shy or not interested? 15 ways to decode his behavior]

2. He hasn’t moved on from his ex

For some people, they can quickly jump from one person to the next, but for others, sex with someone new isn’t easy. There are some guys who don’t have sex for a significant period until they’ve completely moved on from their ex – and that’s completely valid.

This is one of the reasons behind when a guy doesn’t want to sleep with you that isn’t revolving around your attractiveness. They simply aren’t ready to sleep with someone new after being with their ex.

3. He’s bored of the sex

Maybe you are in a long-term relationship, and if that’s the case, sometimes the sex gets a little dull. It’s very easy to take this reason personally, especially when you’re with your partner for a significant period. However, you should also know you can always choose to spice up your sex life and bring back the chemistry and sparks sexually.

If he’s bored of the sex and if you’re in a relationship, it’s not because he doesn’t care about you anymore. It’s about the act itself rather than you. [Read: What men like in bed – 32 things they love and absolutely lust after]

4. He’s interested in someone else

Okay, this is definitely a tough and painful one. Guys can stop having sex with you if they’re interested in someone else entirely. It could very well be that though he was initially interested in you, he met someone else.

Now his attention has moved to them. This sucks, but it can happen. Maybe his initial attraction for you just wasn’t enough to keep sleeping with you.

5. You’re on different pages

He may really want to have sex with you, but he’s stopping himself. Why? Maybe you like him much more than he likes you, and he doesn’t want to hurt you. You often see this in casual relationships, flings, or even one-night stands.

If one of you is on a different page, then sex really isn’t an option for him so he doesn’t lead you on unintentionally. So, sometimes when a guy doesn’t want to sleep with you, he’s looking out for your *and his* emotional well-being by not sleeping with you. [Read: What does a casual relationship mean to a guy and your future together?]

6. He’s stressed out

When men and women are stressed out, it can be difficult to stay focused on sex. Your mind isn’t where it needs to be. Maybe he’s going through a difficult situation, maybe thinking about that bad meeting he had.

Even if sex can be a good distraction, that doesn’t apply to all guys. If he’s not in the right mental frame, then sex is the least of his priorities.

7. He’s self-sufficient

Though most men prefer having sex with an actual person, there are some guys who like to take a time-out and meet their own sexual needs through masturbation.

This is normal for guys and maybe they’re just not in the mood to exert all that effort into having sex with someone. After all, sex is really time-consuming and requires a lot of effort and energy. [Read: Porn for couples? How watching it together could save your relationship]

8. He’s cheating on you

Now we don’t want to rain on your parade and put this in your head. Before you jump to conclusions, look at these other reasons first. Just because he doesn’t have sex with you anymore, cheating isn’t the only possible conclusion.

However, it’s still possible when figuring out when a guy doesn’t want to sleep with you. When a man is cheating on their partner, they withdraw and can even refrain from getting intimate. Really, how many times can a man perform in a day, especially if he’s just walked through the doors after sleeping with someone else? [Read: 21 unintentional behaviors a guy can’t hide when he’s cheating]

9. He’s no longer attracted to you

There was a time when he was very attracted to you and wanted to sleep with you, but that’s fading now. It’s very easy to blame yourself for this reason, but don’t. You have absolutely no fault in this.

In fact, the loss of attraction is sex has more to do with them than you. Maybe they just get easily bored or are incapable of staying in long-term relationships.

10. He has hormonal issues

Many men suffer from low testosterone, which is the hormone that supplies men with the urge to have sex. Both genders can suffer from hormonal issues that can affect their sex drive entirely.

If he has hormonal issues, it can explain why he doesn’t want to have sex with you. If he feels something isn’t right in his body, it’s time he went to the doctor. [Read: 15 natural aphrodisiacs from your kitchen table that work wonders]

11. He has anxiety in the bedroom

Many men can also suffer from performance anxiety, as there’s a lot of pressure on men to impress and satisfy their partners. This can affect his ability to get and maintain an erection.

This kind of pressure can make them hesitant to sleep with any woman with the fear they won’t satisfy them. This doesn’t just go for men who’ve slept with few women, but also for experienced ones.

12. He has a medical condition

There are tons of men who suffer from medical conditions that affect their performance. If they’re taking medication, the side effects could be an inability to get an erection.

This also applies to mental conditions like depression as some antidepressants can make it difficult to get aroused. So, instead of going for it, they pull back. [Read: Why does losing an erection bother men so much]

13. He just doesn’t want to

Haven’t you ever been in a situation where your partner wanted to have sex, but you didn’t feel like it? There was just nothing going on inside of you.

It doesn’t mean he doesn’t find you attractive, but maybe he’d rather watch Netflix with you instead and get lazy. Don’t take it personally – we all have those days. [Read: How to make him want you and not even think about other women]

14. He’s insecure about his body

This might sound like an unusual thing, but guys get insecure about their bodies, too! The reason behind when a guy doesn’t want to sleep with you is because of the way his body looks.

It isn’t just their performance that they worry about, but also their body. Maybe he feels fat, or maybe the breathlessness he experiences when he’s on top of you just makes him feel ashamed of himself. So know this, guys definitely get insecure too! [Read: The most common insecurities of guys that most women have no idea about]

15. His beliefs won’t let him

If the guy you want to sleep with or are dating is a religious person or is a man of God, then you can expect that you’ll only get to sleep with him he ends up marrying you.

There are guys who stick by their faith, no matter how perfect or attractive a woman you are. Don’t take it personally, it’s just that their faith is far more important than getting into bed with you.

16. He’s probably asexual

Asexuality isn’t a very common sexuality, but it’s definitely valid and it exists. This refers to not feeling any sexual feelings for anyone.

If the guy you’re seeing or in a relationship with is asexual, you can expect that he won’t feel that sexual desire for you at all. This doesn’t mean he doesn’t love you or care about you, though. [Read: Asexual people: What it’s like for them in the dating world]

17. His past trauma still haunts him

When a guy doesn’t want to sleep with you, one of the reasons coule be his past trauma. Maybe he just got out of a toxic relationship or maybe a parent died.

Trauma can be very powerful, especially with men’s nature to shut their feelings off. So if he doesn’t want to get into bed with you, it has more to do with his baggage than with you.

18. He sees you as a friend

The same way you wouldn’t dare have sex with a friend, the same could go for him. He might have friend-zoned you without being aware of it. Maybe he just doesn’t feel any sexual or romantic attraction for you to begin with, so he decides not to do anything about it.

This can sting, but that’s okay. Now you have clarity on the situation and can move on with your life. [Read: Friend zone or interested? 15 hints to decode your crush’s behavior]

19. He’s guarded with you

You might find this hard to believe, but men can just be as guarded as women! If he suspects something about you such as maybe a hidden past or something he doesn’t trust about you, then he won’t get into bed with you.

After all, would anyone have sex with someone they don’t trust? The answer is probably a big no.

20. He wants to keep things professional

This often happens in workplace settings but if you’re falling for a co-worker, he might avoid sleeping with you to keep the professionalism. *especially when he’s above you in the corporate ladder!*

It can be a nightmare to deal with the complications if you do end up sleeping with a co-worker, so this is one of the reasons when a guy doesn’t want to sleep with you. It’s nothing against your attractiveness, but they just don’t want to mix pleasure with work.

21. He doesn’t like your personality

Guys aren’t that superficial as the world implies. They don’t have sex with any woman that’s pretty or hot. If they don’t like a woman’s personality or characteristics, they won’t sleep with her.

Even with the possibility of getting laid, they wouldn’t get in bed with someone who has a terrible personality. They aren’t that desperate.

[Read: How to get a guy to sleep with you: Woo him without being slutty]

So, what are the reasons when a guy doesn’t want to sleep with you?

There are several possibilities when a guy doesn’t want to get into bed with you. It can have nothing to do with you, but it can also have something to do with your actions and personality.

[Read: Why do guys distance themselves after having sex? And what you need to do about it]

Men are just as human as women, which means men aren’t as obsessed with sex as you might think. Now you know the reasons why for when a guy doesn’t want to sleep with you, take a step back and give these reasons a real thought.

Liked what you just read? Follow us on Instagram Facebook Twitter Pinterest and we promise, we’ll be your lucky charm to a beautiful love life.

What To Do When Your Ex Wants You Back

Charice — Tue, 07 Sep 2021 07:59:00 GMT

Can’t Stop Breaking No Contact?: Get My Private Method Here

In this blog, we are always looking for ways to get our ex back. Whether we broke up with them or we’re the ones that got dumped, we believe that there’s always a way to find our paths again with our ex-partners. Now when that moment comes and your ex reaches out for a second chance, what do you do? It’s a big deal, right? After months or years of recovering from the emotional pain and letting your past memories go, your ex shows up wanting to get back together. Now you’re wondering what to do when your ex wants you back.

Even if you badly want to get back together, simply saying yes may not be the best way to begin a new relationship. When your ex initiates contact and wants to talk, there are some questions you need to ask yourself as you decide the next move:

What does your ex really want? What is on his mind when he’s looking for a second chance? What would be the implications of getting back together with your ex? If you really want to get back together, then what are the things that you can do to become better partner? Are there still unresolved issues between both of you? How much time have both of you spent apart from each other?

How can you maintain a healthy relationship? Can you two make it work again?

The key is not to jump to an answer right away. Take your time to evaluate your options and decide what’s best for you. The last thing is to put yourself into an unhealthy relationship and ruin all your efforts of becoming the amazing woman you are.

What To Do When Your Ex Wants You Back

I’m not going to lie, it’s a big decision to decide whether you want to get back with your ex or not. Regardless if you want to get back together or not, the feeling is different when it actually happens. Now that you’re doing great being single, you need to evaluate whether going to a new relationship will change your lifestyle for the better. Here are some questions that you should ask yourself. Trust me, you can’t have your single life when you’re a loving relationship. What to do when your ex wants you back?

1. Being a woman, you have options

You don’t have to be the woman that gets back with her ex. However, what you should do is to know how to deal with a broken heart and be an overall great person. It’s not easy when your heart is broken but it’s more important that you feel better so you can move on. In order to do that, there are many things you can do.

2. Talk it out

When you’re in a relationship, communication is always the key. If there’s anything your ex and you want to work on or improve, then talk about it. Talk about the things that is bothering you or the things that needs to change as a couple. Communication is more than just talking about what’s wrong with your ex or their behavior; communication is really important for people to understand each other and grow on together.

3. Caring about your ex

It’s not easy when someone you love makes you feel bad but there’s something you can do. You can learn how to care about other people and love them the way they are, not the way they make you feel. If you do that, then that means you’re being a nice person and trying to make friends with your ex instead of being angry with them.

4. Do something productive with yourself

You’re at a point where you should know that you can do something better for yourself. You don’t have to continue your unhealthy relationship anymore. There are many things you can do to become a better version of yourself. Becoming a better person is not easy because it will take time but if you really want it, then stick with it and you will be great!

5. Do something good for your ex too

In this case, I mean don’t be the kind of person who’s just mad and antisocial. If you’re the one initiating the breakup, then you don’t have to be mad at your ex anymore. It’s good to let them know that you’re doing great and they should too.

I remember one time, my ex wanted me back. It ended up being a bad idea because we didn’t work out at all. When I broke up with him, he wanted to keep the relationship going but things weren’t working out. Eventually, we got back together and it took us another couple of months before it worked out. I knew then that it was a bad idea and that’s why I should have never gotten back with him since the start. It was a huge mistake.

It’s never a good idea to get back with someone because you think you deserve it. You can’t treat anyone the way you want them to treat you, no matter if they’re your ex or not.

It’s important to understand that it’s just wrong. There’s something called being fair and treating others how they want to be treated. So, always remember that and make sure that you do things in a right and healthy manner when it comes to getting back together with your ex.

You can’t always control everything that happens, especially when you’re dealing with your ex. Things always work out in the end but what’s important is to be strong and not to give up.

This is why I think it’s good to take a break from your ex, there’s no point in following them all over the place because they’re just using you again and again, like a broken record.

What Should I Do When My Ex Wants Me Back?

While your ex may think it’s a fantastic idea to get back together, you should consult with your best friend and family about this. Keep in mind that romantic relationships are a two-way street. Even if your ex-boyfriend wants you back, you need to fully assess whether he is willing to put in the effort for the long run.

Because if he’s only thinking about the happy memories, he may not be able to handle the struggles and walk away. You might end up with a broken relationship again. So before you make a definitive decision, consult your inner circle and see if it’s worth giving your old flame another shot.

Get back with your ex if they’ve changed and are willing to change again because relationships aren’t perfect at all. But, don’t stay with them just because they want to get back together. People change and you need to understand that things will work out eventually in the end, so you need to give them time.

Take the time to make your decision. Go out on a few dates and see if the feelings for your ex-boyfriend are still there. After a few dates, there should be a few obvious signs that will help you make a coherent decision on whether your ex is still right for you.

Now there’s another topic you need to carefully assess and that is trust. Depending on the reason you two broke up, trust will become a major topic when getting back together. If there’s a breach of trust in your past relationship, don’t think it won’t happen again. You’ll have to clearly communicate and make your ex prove that he’s a changed man and not the bad person he was before. If your ex didn’t appreciate you or he wanted you back for all the wrong reasons, then don’t be that person and just move on.

I remember one time, I broke up with my ex because he wanted to continue being in a relationship with his new girlfriend. It was bad because it was bad news for me and I knew it wouldn’t work out in the end. But he didn’t try to call me or anything so I stopped trying to get back together with him.

Be direct with your questions. If your ex is intentionally diverting his answers, it’s a clear sign he’s not genuine about a committed relationship. There’s one more thing you need to know about getting back together with your ex. Always remember that communication is key. If you’re in a relationship and there are communication issues, then there’s broken trust between you two.

What Do You Say When Your Ex Wants You Back?

You need to know that your ex wants you back because he actually wants a healthy relationship. It’s the best option and every good man deserves a second chance, especially when you two have had a rough time in the past. Ask about his feelings towards you, ask about his goals and if there’s still something there that makes him want to be with you. Be careful though, don’t express your emotions unless you want your ex to know exactly what they are. Communication is key.

You can start by spending time with him. Ask your mutual friends how your ex-boyfriend really feels and what he wants from a new relationship. Be honest with yourself, ask yourself if you’re still in love with him or are you just looking for a replacement and the easy way out. If you’re still in love with your ex-boyfriend then there’s a good chance that it will work out in the end. Ask your mutual friends how they think he feels about you. If he really wants to get back together then he’ll find the right time to talk to you about it.

Why Would An Ex Want You Back?

There are certain things that a man wants in a woman. If you’re someone’s ex then it means that you were the one who broke up with them. They’ll always want you back if they never felt like they fully invested in the relationship or if they still love you and want to make it work again. Here are some other times when your ex wants to be with you again:

When your ex wants to get back together, take some time to think about what happened between the two of you before. Always remember that you can’t always control everything that happens between you two. Things always work out in the end but what’s important is to be strong and not to give up.

This is why I think it’s good to take a break from your ex, there’s no point in following them all over the place because they’re just using you again and again, like a broken record.

How Do You Stay Strong When Your Ex Wants You Back?

Stay strong and don’t panic, there’s always a chance to get back together so don’t lose hope. Be cool and tell your ex that you need time to think by yourself. Let them know that you’re not going anywhere but if they want to get back together then they have to prove that they mean it. One common mistake is agreeing quickly to your ex’s wishes without a bit of time contemplating. Now is definitely not the time to wear your heart of your sleeve and pour out your strong emotion out.

Make your ex-boyfriend work for his second chance. And if he is willing to go the distance, then he just might be worth going back for.

Get My Guide On Dealing With Breakups: Breakup Is Over

Wait, Do You Still Have A Chance?

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NEVER Marry a Man Who Has These 7 Habits

Adam Lodolce — Sun, 05 Sep 2021 14:00:49 GMT

Marriage can be a beautiful thing. But anyone who is in a long-lasting, committed, loving marriage will also tell you that marriage is hard work. Couples in those relationships devote their time and energy to making it work, and they’re both all-in on their marriage.

This brings me on to the flip side: marriage can also be a total disaster.

Have you ever had a friend tell you they were getting married, and you knew deep down that it was the wrong move for them? That they were about to make the BIGGEST mistake.

And maybe you told them, and they liked you a little less because you did.

Or you kept quiet because you wanted to be happy for them. But day by day, you watched EVERYTHING fall apart.

What I don’t get is how so many people treat marriage so flippantly.

Some couples can’t stop fighting with each other but think getting married will fix their problems.

Some couples have both been unfaithful but think getting married will stop them from wanting to cheat again.

There are couples who barely even know each other, get hammered one weekend in Vegas, and think getting married is a fun, sexy, wild thing to do.

Here’s the deal: marriage will not fix any problems in a relationship. Marriage will magnify the problems you already have and make them a million times worse.

So if you’re considering marrying a guy any time soon, this is my plea to you: be very intentional about it.

And don’t even think about marrying a man who has any of these 7 habits.

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When you’re with the right person, marriage can be wonderful, but still REALLY hard.

He’ll forget to pick a carton of milk up for you in the store for what feels like the gazillionth time, and you’ll FLIP YOUR LID and wonder why you ever married the guy.

“IT’S NOT ABOUT THE MILK ADAM; IT’S ABOUT WHAT THE MILK REPRESENTS!”

Seriously though, don’t rush into it. Forget about trying to check those boxes or hit some self-imposed deadline. Take your time. Get to know this man really well.

Because a diamond ring on your finger will mean NOTHING when you’re in a marriage that makes you miserable.

Have you ever been in a relationship with a man that had any of these toxic habits?

How did it go? Leave me a comment below.

Your Coach,

How To Get Your Ex Boyfriend To Want You Back

Charice — Tue, 31 Aug 2021 07:53:00 GMT

Can’t Stop Breaking No Contact?: Get My Private Method Here

It’s the elusive question in the back of every women’s mind after a breakup. Our life is flipped upside down the second our ex-boyfriend wants out of the relationship. We hope it was an impulsive decision that our ex will regret instantly. We hope he’s made a huge mistake calling it quits. But despite the painful breakup, our mind is racing to plot a game plan on how to get your ex-boyfriend to want you back.

I know you’re desperate. And every second apart from you seems like he is slipping away. The longer you wait, the most you worry about losing him, right? It might be true, but keep in mind that reaching out to your ex too early will push your ex even further away. If you’re in the No Contact period, take this time to deal with your emotions and focus on yourself.

Once you have regained your confidence, then it’s time to come up with a game plan to get your ex-boyfriend who wants you back.

How To Get Your Ex Boyfriend To Want You Back

Before you have a plan of attack, you should implement the No Contact Rule first to heal your broken heart. This step is vital for you to figure out what’s best for you. It’s the perfect time for you to reflect on your life and decide how you want to move forward in real life. While you take a break from a committed relationship, focus on your own goals.

Define your success and happiness.

To get your ex-boyfriend to want you back, you need to first change yourself. You need to practice. You can’t expect your ex-boyfriend to desire you back if you’re not taking care of yourself. You have to develop a new outlook on life. It will give you the courage and confidence boost you need to get your ex-boyfriend back.

The next important step is to make a list of which issues caused the breakup. Ask yourself what you did wrong and why your ex-boyfriend wants out. While looking for answers, ask yourself if your ex wants to move on with his life or he is trying to get you to let go of the relationship.

Take notes as it will help you process your thoughts and reasons why your ex-boyfriend wants out of the relationship.

Trust me, this is a crucial step for you to take to help you decide the best move for you. The more you work through your feelings, the less you’ll make moves as a desperate person. And the less desperate you act, the more your ex will see you as a valued person.

Once you have figured out why your ex-boyfriend wants out of the relationship, it’s going to make your plan of attack easier. If your ex wants more freedom, give him the space he wants. If he is looking to make a big push in his career, reach out and give him a few words of encouragement. It could be a big boost for your ex-boyfriend to know that he has your support even when he’s moved on.

If you’ve determined that the breakup was because of something you did wrong and why your ex-boyfriend wants out, then it’s about time you change. You need to highlight the positive changes you’ve made and lift your weaknesses. Your ex might be holding a grudge against you for something or other personal reasons. By letting go of your pride, you can let your ex-boyfriend know that you’ve changed and are willing to work on the relationship.

If you’re wondering how to get your ex-boyfriend to want you back, then the rest is easy. Be yourself and communicate what’s on your mind. If it’s important to this relationship, be prepared to talk about it even if it’s uncomfortable for both of you.

How Long Does It Take For An Ex Boyfriend To Want You Back?

It all depends on your ex-boyfriend’s feelings. If you both have deep feelings for one another, then he will miss you and want to get back together in a short period of time. However, if your ex-boyfriend has no desire to reconcile with you, then it could take months or even years for him to reach out. Perhaps you can try to reach out from time to time to stay on your ex’s mind. But this depends on how he will react when he gets your message. I know it sounds difficult, but keep in mind that the longer you wait, the more you could be hurt. And the more hurt you are, the harder it will be to face him.

Be confident and remember that your ex-boyfriend is going through a tough time as well. It’s not easy having one person leave you for another one we’re close to. If you want to have a healthy relationship with your ex-boyfriend, you need to let him choose to come back on his terms. Using any so-called clever tricks is short-minded and short-lived. If you play your cards wrong, you might come across as desperate with a lack of respect for your ex. These fatal mistakes [TC1] can ruin your chances forever. The best thing for you to do is give your ex-boyfriend time and space. Let him live his life while you enjoy your current life. Take care of yourself and put yourself first. Once he notices the positive changes, he will be more than happy to get back together with you.

What To Do If Your Ex Boyfriend Wants You Back

If your ex-boyfriend is already trying to get in touch with you, then it means he has already thought about the breakup and knows it was a mistake. However, sending your ex-boyfriend mixed signals or with a touch of desperation will only scare him away. If you want to get your ex back, then there are a few simple steps for you to follow.

Be honest and own up to what you did wrong. Your ex boyfriend wants to be with a person he can trust. Anyone can make a mistake, but a person who can admit her mistakes is someone trustworthy [TC1] and honorable.

If you were the one that caused the breakup, then talk to your ex-boyfriend. If it’s possible to fix or change, then let him know what you’re willing to do about it. Stay positive about the situation and don’t blame him for causing this breakup because it was something that affected both of you equally.

What To Say To An Ex To Get Him Back

Although getting a boyfriend back is hard, especially if you have hurt him with your actions, there are a few simple steps you can take to get him back. Also, keep in mind that this process might take time and is not something in which you should rush.

Avoid making huge concessions if you want to get your ex boyfriend back. It’s not something that’s going to end up benefiting you in the long run. However, while keeping this in mind, do not try to rewind time or pretend things haven’t happened.

Realize that one of the biggest mistakes you can make is waiting for your ex to reach out to you. If you want to have a healthy relationship with your ex-boyfriend, then you both need to communicate on a regular basis. To keep him on the good side, let him know what’s going on in your life and how he was able to come back into it. If you are in his mind, then let him know that he’s still important to you.

Remember that you’ve broken up with your ex boyfriend. It’s a fact that the breakup occurred for a reason. This is why you need to make sure that you don’t do anything crazy to try to get him back. If your ex-boyfriend wants to go his separate ways, then let him.

It might be a good idea for you to allow your ex-boyfriend the time and space he needs. This will ensure that you do not push him away. This is the most important thing you can do to get your ex-boyfriend back. If you haven’t heard from him in a few weeks, then ask him politely for an update. You don’t want to push your ex-boyfriend away again, so you must be careful with your words and actions. If he’s made clear why the breakup occurred, then try to fix the problem if possible.

Don’t make the huge mistake of reminding your ex of your past relationship. While you think you two were great, your ex-boyfriend may think otherwise in his mind.

If it’s possible, try to be patient and wait for him to reach out first. You can either wait in hopes that his love will grow or let him know that you’re open to communication whenever he needs it.

How To Make Ex Boyfriend Want You Back

If the feeling is real… if he loves you then he will want you back. However, if you are not sure about love, then it depends on many things. The heart is indeed pure, but there are times in which it can be corrupted. You have to be sure that you truly want your ex-boyfriend back.

He might not feel the same way as you do, so you have to have confidence in yourself and know that your feelings will eventually return to what they used to be. Also, if he wants something from you, then he will wait for it until one of those days when he feels safe again. You want to be there for him and help him get over what had happened to you.

That being said, this can be done differently. You don’t have to go into his arms the moment you see him. It is better to let him come to you.

Make the effort. Lead your ex-boyfriend to think positively about you. And human nature will work its magic to make him want you back. When someone loves you, they will want you back.

It sounds like a leap of faith. But as long as you are a confident person, you shouldn’t have anything to worry about in finding a lasting relationship. As long as you keep putting yourself out there with your social life, you will find your true destiny again. And when you do, you will be surprised by how well the situation resolves itself. Being a little more open-minded will ease the tension between you and your ex.

At first, you will want to move on from your breakup with him, but over time, you will know that it was the best thing for both of you to come to an end. If he doesn’t want to talk to you or contact you for a while after a breakup, then it would be better if you avoid doing anything that can upset him.

Get My Guide On Dealing With Breakups: Breakup Is Over

Wait, Do You Still Have A Chance?

Find out what your chances are of getting your ex back with
this 2 minute quiz.

How Do You Make Him Want You Back

Charice — Tue, 24 Aug 2021 07:45:00 GMT

Can’t Stop Breaking No Contact?: Get My Private Method Here

It’s not an easy task. But in the back of every woman’s mind who lost the love of their life, they want to know how to make their ex boyfriend want them back. How do you make him want you back? Especially when he initiated the breakup after a long-term relationship.

You may have legitimate reasons to get back together, but starting a new relationship with your ex isn’t going to work if he is not on board. It doesn’t matter if it was a fling or a long-term relationship, if he wants you back, he’ll want you back.

It’s not going to be easy. You’ll have to go through the same challenges as your old relationship to get him back. It’ll be a challenge made more difficult because of your history together.

So How Do You Make Him Want You Back?

I’ve made the huge mistake myself of initiating with an ex to get back together. I was desperate, lost, and weak during that time period. In my mind, I felt my happiness and future depended on this ex. Even though I knew we had a broken relationship, I strongly believed my ex-boyfriend was the one.

I was wrong. And spending all that energy to convince my ex to get back together made my life worse. My instincts were wrong and at times, I felt embarrassed to forfeit my power and self-esteem to an ex-boyfriend who didn’t care for me.

So if you want to make him want you back, the first thing you need to do is bounce back on your own. Don’t make the same mistake I did to quickly pursue love again before you’re ready. You need to have your emotions in control, and live the life you’ve dreamed of. You will never get your ex back if you are not in a good place. You’ll be begging in the end.

How? You have to overcome your fear, joy, and disappointment. No matter how bad it was, you had to go through that to find peace of mind and gain confidence. You need to have closure if he wants you back. And above all else, listen to your gut instinct about what’s right for you and what’s right for him.

Here are some things to consider to make your ex want you back.

1. Become Ungettable

People want what they can’t have. It’s simple as that. Once you get through the emotional pain of the breakup, it’s time to dress up and work on yourself. Go to the bar, have fun, and meet new people. Get out of your old bad habits. Exercise again and eat healthily.

You can’t go back to your old dating pool with the same habits, thoughts, behaviors, and emotions as before. You can’t feel any different when you’re with your ex-boyfriend if you want him back. He wants you because he doesn’t have you anymore.

Confident women attract men. When your ex-boyfriend sees a different side of you, it will naturally draw his curiosity and make him want to reach out.

2. Don’t Dwell On the Past

Don’t live in the past and regret what happened. Focus on your present and what you can achieve in the future. Even if you had great memories with your ex, think about new ways to create better memories with him. The more you reminisce, the more you are holding yourself back from greatness.

The simple truth is that your relationship was broken and the only way to get over it is to focus on your new life. You need to redirect your mindset to allow yourself enough energy for a new beginning.

This is where the No Contact Rule comes in and plays an important role in your healing process. Use the first 30 days to get over your emotional pain and move on to a new beautiful life.

3. Give Him Time and Space To Want You Back

Your ex’s thoughts and feelings about you will take some time to change. Therefore, give him time to work out his own emotions, issues, and plans he has for himself. Some men choose to break up because they need to be on their own to figure out what they need.

So here’s your foolproof plan. Give your ex his time and space and let him enjoy his freedom. While he’s on his journey, you should be focusing on yours. Think of this period as an active time for you to tick off a few goals on your bucket list.

This is the perfect time to make plans that you couldn’t have while you were in a relationship. Once you’re in a good place with your confidence in check, you can then reach out to your ex. Or call him up after months of no contact for a brief catch-up date.

How Can I Make Him Want Me Again?

How Do You Make Him Want You Back

You need to look at this from a different direction. Focus on yourself and your life. Figure out what you want, how you will achieve it, and what your life will look like when you get there. Once you’ve made sense of your new plan for life, then reach out to him. If he still doesn’t feel the same way about you, then accept it as his decision and move on with your life.

Your ex is not going to instantly take you back. It’s not an impulsive decision that your ex will lightly make to want you back. So guys need to re-evaluate their pros and cons and see if it makes sense for them to get into a committed relationship.

For them, changing their relationship status from single to committed is a big deal!

If you’re in love with that person, you can’t force them to change. If he wants you back, he can come to you and say it himself.

But if he doesn’t want a relationship right now, then have some self-respect and let him go. Don’t be needy or pushy. Just be cool and acknowledge that it’s his choice for his benefit to break up with you. You still need to get your life together first before focusing on someone else again.

How Can I Make Him Miss Me Badly?

Part of making your ex want you back starts by making him miss you badly. The No Contact Rule is the best way for your ex to miss you. He realizes that he can’t access or see you — and he starts to miss the comfort of your old relationship. He’ll have to deal with a new life without you where there are many emotions, challenges, and opportunities for self-growth.

Now, some people think the best way to make an ex miss them is by turning to their social life or getting into rebound relationships. While this may get your ex-boyfriend’s attention and make him a little jealous, it could also backfire if you are trying too hard.

One of the fatal mistakes women make is to post excessively about their social life on social media to get people’s attention. Don’t fall into this impulsive behavior that will only ruin your reputation. Your ex will see right through your efforts.

Keep your life private and don’t show off. Let your ex find your new successes through word of mouth.

What Can I Say To Make Him Want Me Back?

There are some things you can say to make your ex want you back. But the question is: is it the right thing to do? A lot of people make it a habit to flat-out ask their ex-boyfriend if he wants them back. A lot of guys will tell you “no”, and in this case, it’s better to leave him alone.

Even if your ex wanted to get with you again, his pride might prevent him from taking the first step and contacting you. If you think your ex-boyfriend has been missing you and thinks about you all the time, why not just get in contact with him?

Don’t do it out of desperation. Don’t beg him to take you back. Don’t try to convince him that you’re the right person for him.

And please don’t argue with your ex or make more drama. Just be cool, act as if nothing ever happened, and then ask how he is doing on a friendly level. Your ex will be able to tell that you’re not desperate or needy. If he does like you, then he will reach out to you first.

If your ex-boyfriend doesn’t want to talk to you, then move on and leave it at that. You don’t need guys who are too proud or who aren’t willing to admit their mistakes.

Don’t keep bashing your ex over and over again just because he wasn’t man enough to apologize or change his mind about the breakup. You can find another beautiful love life when your life is going your way. As long as you have an ungettable mindset, your feminine energy will take you to new grounds for love. How do you make someone fall in love with you?

You are who you are, and you can’t change that. You have to accept yourself first before anyone else can. The most attractive thing about you is your confidence to pursue the life that you want — it’s what makes guys want to be with you because they know that there are great things ahead.

Wanting something is a great motivational tool for making something happen.

How Do You Make Him Think About You All The Time?

You have to let your ex see that you’re doing fine without him. Acting needy and desperate is not the way to get what you want. You need to focus on making yourself happy first. When you do that, you’ll naturally be happier and more confident in who you are and what you can do for yourself.

In your new single life, there is an abundance of opportunities waiting for you — explore it! It’s a new world where you can put yourself out there without the restrictions of a relationship. You can dress in the outfits you’ve always wanted to wear — just for you. You can go out with your friends without him tagging along. You can go on a date with someone you have a crush on. Life is yours for the taking — so make the most of it!

Men love confident, independent women. When your ex-boyfriend sees you happy and having fun without him, he may start to miss you more. He’ll realize that he doesn’t know what life is like without you — so the grass may be greener on your side. Don’t go overboard with this new single lifestyle, but don’t hide it from him either. There’s no need to be ashamed of your new self that’s making your ex-boyfriend jealous.

As long as you are radiating positive emotions, your ex-boyfriend is going to see and feel them on a regular basis. And over a period of time, human nature is going to make him want you back because he cannot resist losing someone awesome like you.

Get My Guide On Dealing With Breakups: Breakup Is Over

Wait, Do You Still Have A Chance?

Find out what your chances are of getting your ex back with
this 2 minute quiz.

VIDEO 2 – Will No Contact Make Him Move On

View more posts — Thu, 22 Jul 2021 02:10:28 GMT

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If You Want to Have Sex, Listen

John Gorman — Wed, 30 Jun 2021 17:24:30 GMT

You want to know what the perfect partnership is? The perfect partnership mostly makes us feel safe, but sometimes thrills us. People enjoy feeling safe most of the time, and thrilled some of the time — yet only if we’re ready for it and wanting it.

I can expand on this further for you if you like, yet, since I’m the kind of long-winded prick who dropped a 327-minute read last week, of course I’ll continue.

The perfect partnership is actually four things:

Two people who really, really enjoy hanging out with each other.
Two people who like each other the same amount.
Two people who express their love for each other in the way the other prefers to receive it.
Two people who enjoy fucking each other immensely.

That’s all we’re all looking for. Maybe that didn’t take. Let me frame it in something else we all crave besides, and even more than, sex: let’s use food as an example.

Imagine the perfect dish. It contains a flavor profile: Savory, salt, sweet, bright (sour, citrus), spice.

Two people who enjoy hanging out with each other? Well, you’d want to savor your time with them, no?

Ever over-salt a dish and it makes you recoil in disgust? That recoil is avoidant attachment. Ever under-salt a dish and wish it could be more than what it is? That’s anxious attachment. Secure lies in between … perfectly salted.

Ever express your love for someone in a way they prefer to receive it? Wow, that’s mighty sweet of you. Ever receive love from someone who expressed it in the way you wanted it? That’ll brighten your day. Sweet-and-sour.

Great sex? Guess what … that’s the spice.

That’s what we’re all after. That delicious, nutritious, satisfying recipe that you can make, and eat, over and over again — day after fucking day. And whether you’re a man, woman, transgender, intersex, queer, straight, bi, pan or really, really into Nickelback … that’s what we all want.

Only straight white males seem to have the audacity to write certain scrolls denying certain flavors to women (and, also, to men … since we don’t seem all that interested in securing a safe, loving partnership — at least on the Internet)— that’s not to say misogynoir isn’t a very real thing, or that there isn’t an epidemic of South Asian men committing domestic violence, but it’s not my place to speak on these, because if there’s only one cardinal rule for men like me, it’s to never punch down on the bullshit Colonial hierarchy of personhood. I acknowledge it, but, let’s be real: I’ve never read a seduction article written by anything other than by a white dude. And, yes, I’ve seen Hitch, but, let’s be real again: That’s not an actual how-to guide, I wasn’t taking notes, and that movie’s forgettable as fuck — all due to respect to Will Smith.

The Joy of a Daily Partnership

Harry Hogg — Wed, 30 Jun 2021 15:39:25 GMT

I write about love, not really knowing what it is, and hardly an expert in giving. If certain experiences I write about seem born of pain, they surely were, but the reward — not always apparent at the time, disregards the sorrow and self-pity. The truth is I have never loved and not learned something valuable. It seems, looking back, I always came away with more than I gave. Even when I was sure I’d given everything.

I’ll call up one day and she may wonder who I am. If my mind serves me well, she is the one who smelled like violets. Or the one who left me at the café, turning back long enough to say, don’t call me until after ten o’clock, my mother goes to bed quite early.

When I decided to write a journal that covered fifty years of loving, I had a thousand scraps of paper, names scribbled on business cards, letters stuffed in shoeboxes, dresser drawers, matchboxes, beer mats. I never had the courage to throw them away, hoping there was a chance they’d remember me.

No one’s hurt is the same as someone else. Still, it’s not nice to tell lies but sometimes it’s difficult straddling the fence between love and loving. For instance, an old acquaintance, twenty-three years since, sent me word that she would appear in a new play in Covent Garden, sending tickets for the opening. That evening, when the curtain fell, I headed backstage to see her. While waiting outside her dressing room door with other well-wishers, I managed not to look at any of them in the eye. It’s not that her performance was bad or that middle age is perhaps a tad old for an actress to be playing a teenager, it was more what I might say while still saying nothing, when suddenly she was holding her arms out toward me.

Amazing, absolutely amazing, I said, I cried during that last scene.

You. You. You, my dear Harry, are incredible. I couldn’t wait to know if you came, she said, how long is it, you rogue.

I can’t say enough. Wonderful, I said. A sentiment which was particularly good since I’d managed to say nothing whatsoever, allowing me time to recall when it was we last met. It was 1989, the Grammy Awards, Bette had the record of the year, Wind Beneath My Wings, I think.

You think? You’re such a prick, Harry. Are you not sure?

I remember the party around town when The Grammy’s were finally over. Instead of going back to the hotel and getting indigestion over the whole thing, it kind of made more sense to make the party round, gulp down a few drinks, eat ridiculous food, and hope to keep out of trouble.

My lips have always been sealed, Harry. I wouldn’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings — not to their face anyway, I knew you were loving me, I was glad for that. I wasn’t in love with you. I remember you wore dark glasses. I asked why. You said you were dead and didn’t want anyone to notice. I understood, even though I’d never loved someone that hard. The following morning, your bite mark was still on my shoulder blade. That was the last time I saw you, Harry.

I didn’t want to recall what she had recalled. Shame, maybe. I said, simply, I remember when music was really music.

Don’t kid me; you’re not that old, she said. Then, after a pause, seeing regret on my face, she went on, of all the women who ever loved you during those years, my name would surely be down the list. I wouldn’t be surprised. But I’ve never held anything in my heart for you but love, Harry.

What does a lover give to a lover that has not already been offered or been given back?

I gave her a list of my troubles. She listened and gave me comfort. I always imagined I could run ahead of myself and smooth out the rough spots before I got there.

When love had pinned me to the wall and left me dying, trampled with heartache, she was one who revived me. I didn’t make love to her, but I loved her. My gift to her was to make sure she didn’t love me a day more.

Some find at midnight the hope of every dawn. Love, or what it stands in for, is spit out in the time between. Head to head, heart to heart and otherwise, I have not found the perfect fifty years of loving, instead building up something to live for that might end beautifully, because that, in the end, is found in the joy of a daily partnership.

I’m Sorry

Laura Culberg- Welcoming Opposites — Wed, 30 Jun 2021 15:25:01 GMT

Parenting in a time of global despair

Photo by Markus Spiske on Unsplash

“The lake feels like lotion!” the little boy shouted to his friends, treading water at the base of the ladder. “So smooth and refreshing!”

I lay on the other side of the dock, my head propped up with a life jacket, reading my book, Love Becomes Us by Amy Bloom. It was hot, hotter than it had ever been in the Pacific Northwest where I live.

My family had been lucky. We escaped to this mountain lake on a planned trip with my brother-in-law and his kids. Instead of 108 degrees, it was only 99 and we could hang out in this cold glacial lake all day long.

The little boy shouting was eight or nine years old, skinny and tan, happy and energized. He jumped off the dock over and over, laughing with pleasure every time. I remember the days when my daughter had that kind of ease, that kind of access to simple pleasures.

These days are complicated. The world feels like it is ending. There was the pandemic, over a year of lockdown seeped with fear and longing. And now this heat, record-breaking, devastating — to people, animals, and nature. This heat is preparing our region for fires that will destroy more land, more humans and wildlife, more homes, more trees. Like last summer, we will be stuffed into our homes, windows sealed, hiding from the smoke outside.

When I was eight or nine I didn’t think about the earth. We never talked about it. I remember waiting in line for gas at the Shell station on 54th street with my mom. I remember her explaining that Jimmy Carter was rationing gas because there was an oil crisis. I lived a life, essentially into my twenties with the ignorant luxury of not worrying about our dying planet. Back then we didn’t talk about climate change or global warming. I wish we had. Maybe if we had things would be different now. The planet I am leaving my daughter wouldn’t be so hot and angry and scary.

My daughter is sixteen now. When she was eight she knew things about the earth. In third grade, she raised money to support people who lost everything in the Japanese Tsunami. She’s always known how to recycle and compost. She grew up with Hybrid cars and conversations about red meat at dinner. She is keenly aware of the crisis our Earth is experiencing.

And, she is becoming an adult during this crisis. Like Elizabeth, the protagonist in Bloom’s, Love Becomes Us, my daughter is traversing the complicated emotional landscape that comes with adolescence. Elizabeth is wise beyond her years. She can see the hypocrisy of her parents and the other adults around her. Like most teens, Elizabeth is struggling in her own way to just get through the painful, confusing adolescent years.

As I read my book, I can remember what that felt like, how my emotions moved through me when I was that age. I have glimpses, flashes of memory. I remember when I was seventeen and all I did was cry. I cried on the road trip I took with my family. I cried in my room at night. I cried over gifts I got at Christmas. I cried and cried and I didn’t really understand why.

Yesterday I told my daughter that I was tired of her speaking to me like she was mad at me all the time. “I’m sorry,” she replied, “I do feel angry all the time.”

She said it so matter-of-factly, with such certainty that my vision blurred for a split-second. I scanned my brain for something to say but there was nothing. “Noooooo,” I cried to myself, “I don’t want this for her.”

I’ve been here before. It’s the heartbreak of motherhood, the moment when I know clearly that there is nothing I can do, no balm I can smooth over a scraped knee, no lullaby I can sing, no goodnight story I can tell to make everything feel better.

I think about the Earth all the time. I am terrified about where we’ve been in the last year, afraid of what is coming. When I talk about my worries, sometimes my daughter will say, “Please Mom. Please stop. I can’t hear this right now.” And I know she is frightened too. Unlike me at sixteen, she is aware. She knows things.

While my daughter is living the emotional thunderstorm of hormonal adolescence, there is a blanket of disaster overlaying everything. How will she manage this? How will she find her way?

The path we are on, the too-late feeling I have about our planet, is often too much for me so how do teenagers who are just waiting to get to the next phase manage it? What do they think when the next phase is filled with 108 degree days, fires in the rain forest, and global droughts?

There are good times too, like yesterday when my daughter and her cousin sunbathed together for hours, took the kayak out, and loudly sang songs on the deck that echoed across the lake. I know that along with being angry, my daughter is happy too. Like all teenagers, her landscape is complicated and unpredictable.

Adolescence is a global disaster in itself. It is an earthquake, tornado, tsunami, and hurricane wrapped into an eight to ten-year period. I know my daughter will get through this period. And as she ages, she will figure out how to move through all of the disasters in front of her. She will find moments of joy and celebration and excitement along the way. But I feel for her. I feel for all of the teenagers right now. Their burden is profound, beyond any that I could have imagined at that young age.

There’s no balm, no simple fix for this. When the conversation about the environment comes up, as it so often does these days, all I can do is look at my daughter, and say, “I’m sorry” because I am.

I really, really am.

How To Give Him Space So He Pursues You (Why Men Respond To Distance)

Nick Bastion — Fri, 11 Sep 2020 15:50:47 GMT

You’ve probably heard it a million times in a million different ways. Men need their space and they love the chase.

But how do you combine these two things so that you have him pursuing you like crazy and putting in the effort to lock you down?

Stick with me as I expose why men respond to distance, why men pull away, why men hate it when women don’t give this and how to “pull him to you like a super-powered magnet” using my reel in technique.

If you do not know the “Reel him in technique,” he will ultimately pull away and you lose the man you love for good.

Giving a man space is crucial to this working and by the end you’ll know how to give him space and make him miss you.

Let’s dive right in…

Watch The Video: Why Men Respond To Distance

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Men Respond To Distance Because It’s A New Vibe

Distance really boils down to having and giving space. It’s at the heart of any good relationship. The solution here is to give men space and use that time to actively work on yourself.

The reason why men run hot and cold, why they respond to distance, why he stops pursuing you and starts pulling away all boils down to not knowing how to give him space.

Most love advice, dating tips do not cover solid solutions for women that actually work when trying to get love, have better dating opportunities and forge happy, healthy relationships.

Most women cheat themselves out of experiencing love because they interrupt a man’s process of falling in love. Men fall in love in your absence, when they’re away from you by themselves. Absence makes the heart grow fonder.

You have to give him space to miss you and process his emotions. Men work out their emotions in private, which is why it’s so important giving him space to figure out what he wants.

But what do you do when you’re giving him space? Focus on yourself and living your own happy life that you love! It’s that simple.

MORE: Why Men Pull Away: 3 Easy Ways To Stop A Man From Withdrawing

Take The Quiz: Is He Losing Interest?

Click here to take our quick (and shockingly accurate) “Is He Losing Interest” Quiz right now and find out if he’s really losing interest in you…

Space is a key ingredient to having a successful relationship. It makes him feel safe by giving him the room he needs to breathe and process his emotions (including his feelings of love for you).

Here’s a key to understanding this whole “giving space” thing. A lot of times in pop culture you hear things like “Men don’t want to be in a relationship because they don’t want to ‘lose their freedom’.”

NO! This is not actually what men want or are afraid of. In truth, men just want a relationship where they can feel comfortable and be given space as needed in the relationship.

The popular misconception that men want to run around being single forever is NOT true! What men are really talking about with that is they don’t want to lose is being able to have uninterrupted space in their life when they need it.

Men need space sometimes. It’s good for them and good for your relationship! It can’t be any more simple than that. This space is the “freedom” that society says men “need” and are afraid to lose.

MORE: The Real Reasons Why Men Pull Away After Getting Close

The key thing to understand here is that it’s very easy to give him space when you have your own happy life to focus on and you’re not relying on the relationship to fulfill that for you.

Learn to see needing space as an opportunity instead of an obstacle. Knowing how to give your man space will make all the difference in the way he sees you as his dream woman and partner.

The real problem is not the guy wanting space or giving your guy space. It’s natural for a man to want some space to himself (especially if he’s going through something emotional or stressful).

It’s easy to give a guy space unless you’re worried that giving a guy space will lead to something bad happening. This worrying itself leads to bad things happening because you feed that negativity into the relationship and end up pushing him away.

Now I know you might say, “Well, if I think something bad is going to happen if I give him space, how can I not worry?”

Let me give you an example to illustrate how this worrying can end up destroying your relationship…

You meet this guy and you’re single and happy. Your vibe is good because there’s no pressure on your dynamic. There’s no heaviness. There’s no burden and weight on him to have to be some specific way, do specific things, say specific things a specific way.

It feels good to be around you and he’s attracted because your vibe is good (thus it feels good to be around you) and your relationship feels good.

Here’s where it can all go wrong (this is where so many women make a huge mistake that puts their relationship on track towards failure).

They get excited about the guy becoming their boyfriend. They build him up in their mind, have fantasies about how the future will turn out, obsess over him, want to possess him, expect him to fulfill their hopes and dreams of having love and a relationship in their life.

Without realizing it, they are putting tons of pressure and expectations on themselves, on the guy, and on the relationship. This is where it all goes wrong.

MORE: Decoding Male Behavior: A Guy’s Take on Neediness

Now, instead of the relationship being light and easy, it needs to live up to some kind of ideal or expectation. Instead of you being able to be present in the moments you’re together with him, you are caught up in your head. You feel this constant need for the relationship to get somewhere, you need something to happen, you need him to be a certain way, do certain things, etc.

Instead of things unfolding naturally, you are trapped in this cycle of constantly trying to force things to be some other way than they naturally are and you’re worried and disappointed that they aren’t happening.

This kills your mood and it makes the relationship feel like a total drag instead of the fun, light-hearted vibe it had in the beginning.

And here’s the worst part of it all… you can sense that the relationship is getting worse and he’s drifting away, so you start to worry you’re losing him and you crave reassurance he still wants you and the relationship.

So you try to do and say things to get reassurance from him that he’s still interested in you and still wants the relationship to work out like you want.

However, you never really feel reassured. If he does reassure you, it’s never good enough because deep down you still feel like something is terribly wrong.

And if you don’t get that reassurance, you feel even worse and push harder for it and go to even more extremes to get it! Sooner or later, after smothering and clingy to him with this fearful energy, he ends up leaving (or at the very least tries to put some distance between you).

It’s exhausting to be around someone who is constantly in a negative state like this. Eventually he will be completely drained and the relationship will end on a sour note.

Where did that woman go who was so attractive and easy to be around? Your attractiveness ends the moment you build the relationship up in your mind as something he has to “live up to” in order for you to feel happy and fulfilled.

So when you’re telling me you’re worried that something bad will happen if you give him space, I have to ask you, “Shouldn’t you be a lot more worried if you DON’T give him space?”

Let’s talk about what to do to fix all this and how to give him space in a way that works to bring him back and make your relationship stronger than ever.

MORE: Why He’s Acting Distant All Of A Sudden (and What To Do About It)

What To Do When A Man Is Pulling Away And ‘Needs Space’

I’m going to tell you exactly what not to do, so that you don’t push him away even further and turn a short break into a relationship-ending nightmare.

You have to know how to give someone space without losing them and that includes understanding what not to do so that you don’t damage your relationship beyond repair.

Whatever you do, don’t go chasing after him. Don’t text him a lot, don’t call him, don’t message him on social media, don’t look to him for validation or reassurance. Let him take the space he needs without you reaching out to him and re-inserting yourself into his life.

MORE: Why Men Go Hot & Cold & 5 Things You Need To Do

Don’t let fear of losing the guy end up destroying your relationship!

When you started seeing this guy, you weren’t worried he was going to leave you. You weren’t worried that you were going to “lose something” you had.

If you’re currently worried about your relationship, this just goes to show you that you now think you have something you can lose. Your mindset changed into a negative thought pattern and this “fear of loss” mindset will sabotage your relationship.

What happens is that the more you think about losing the guy, the worse you feel and the more you want these negative feelings to be resolved. So you start acting differently as your negative emotions are now driving the ship. Instead of your own enjoyment being your guide in the relationship, your negative mindset is working on undoing everything and undermining the security you once felt in your relationship.

Your fears of losing him make you want to control him because you’re afraid if you don’t, you might lose him. When people feel like someone is trying to control them, they instinctively pull away.

Similarly, if your thoughts are dominated by fears of losing the guy, your mood will make you not fun to be around. Instead being light, easy, and fun, the mood is paranoid, suspicious, and gloomy. When you’re mood comes off that negatively, people pull away from that and don’t want to be around it.

Plain and simple, people don’t want to feel like they’re being controlled and they don’t want to be around someone who’s in a bad mood. That’s not just a guy thing… that’s a human thing!

What Should You Actually Do To Keep Him By Your Side?

So what’s the solution to all of this? How do you know when to give him space and how to give a guy space so that he misses you and comes right back into your open arms?

First, it’s important to say that it’s completely normal for a guy to want some space, and it’s completely normal to give him space. As I said before, if you try to control him or make him stay with you, it’s only going to drive him further away.

Most guys need time and space in order to start to feel closer and more connected with a woman. That’s why clinging to him and trying to pull him closer is going to backfire every time. It’s like trying to squeeze a cat tight to your chest and make him love cuddling with you. He’ll just push and scratch to get away but leaving him alone will result in him coming back to you when he’s ready.

And that’s why giving him space will make him miss you and make him more likely to come back. Giving a guy space is part of his process for falling in love and staying in love with you and you don’t want to interrupt that process!

The big secret is being happy about giving them space and seeing it as a good thing for your relationship. It’s a matter of perspective!

When you understand that a guy needing space is part of his way of processing emotions, it’s a lot easier to let a guy have his process because you no longer take it personally. He doesn’t want space to get away from you… he wants it so he can have his process!

MORE: Why Men Pull Away When Everything Seems To Be Going Well

If He’s Looking For Some Space, Let Him Have It

You don’t know the exact reason he wants space and that’s OK. You can use this as a lesson for yourself to learn to be OK with not knowing what is on his mind at the moment.

Like I said before, men want space to sort out their feelings and then, when they’re ready, they’ll re-emerge from their shell and reconnect with you. It’s best to consider this a sacred and private process for men and it’s important to men that their partner understands how important it is for them to have space when they need it.

If he needs a day, give him a day. If he needs a week, give him a week.

What should you do in the meantime?

Use this as an opportunity to bring your mood up and fill your life with happy, enjoyable, and positive things. Do things you love doing. Connect with your friends and loved ones. Do anything and everything you can do to feel great, feel appreciative for the good things in your life and feel happy.

Gratitude is a great way to focus on all of the positives you’ve got going on and once you start, it’s not hard to see how much good stuff you’ve got in your life.

This is actually even more important than giving the guy his space for two reasons:

If you’re doing things to enjoy yourself and improve your mood, what are you not doing? You’re not worrying! And if you’re not feeding into the fears, the negativity and the worrying, it won’t feel like torture to just leave him alone and give him space.
You’ll be in a good mood when he does re-emerge, which will likely lead things in a better direction. Having a great mood is like a super-charged magnet in your relationship!

Your good moods will pull things in a good direction and your bad moods will pull things in a bad direction… so if you ever needed a more of a reason to be in a good mood, do it for your love life!

Ironically, men often need space so that they can be in a good mood within the relationship, too. Knowing how to give a man his space includes the understanding that everyone has their process, and relationships work best when both partners understand how to be in a good mood and bring that good mood into the relationship.

If there’s a problem in the relationship that needs to be worked out, so be it. You’ll give him space and then see what happens from there. Oftentimes you might give a guy space and he works the problem out himself and it’s no longer an issue! Or, he comes back and brings up the problem and, if you’re in a good mood and an open state, you can really listen to each other and work it out.

Either way, your best bet is to give him space and work on being your best, happiest self so that when he comes back around, you can resume your relationship on the best foot going forward.

Of course, giving him space is really just the first step… but when it comes down to it there are 2 big problems every woman experiences in her relationships with men – so pay attention because what you do next is vitally important. The first problem you’re probably going through: if you’re already interested in a man and you feel he might be losing interest, going cold, or pulling away then you need to read this right now or risk losing him forever: If He’s Pulling Away, Do This…

The second problem is this: do you know how men determine if a woman is girlfriend material (the type of woman he commits himself to) or if he sees you as just a fling? If not you need to read this next: The #1 Thing Men Desire In A Woman

Want to find out if he’s really losing interest? Click here to take our quick (and shockingly accurate) “Is He Losing Interest” Quiz right now and find out if he’s really losing interest in you…

Take The Quiz: Is He Losing Interest?

Is He Losing Interest?Take the Quiz

In summary…

Men respond to distance because it’s a new vibe
Don’t chase after him to calm your own fears
Let him process his emotions in his own space
If he’s looking for some space, let him have it

Being ghosted: How to deal with it and what to text after he ghosted

Nick Bastion — Mon, 07 Sep 2020 15:56:24 GMT

He ghosted me. Vanished. Radio silence.

Unfortunately, this is a very common thing going on in the dating world today. With so much digital access, it’s easy to ignore a text or call, swipe on to the next match, etc. And of course you’re sitting there confused, wondering how to respond to ghosting, especially if it happens over and over again.

All hope is not lost though. I’m going to reveal the 3 reasons guys ghost and the one text you can use to work in your favor and fix things. The next time you find yourself lost, you’ll know what to text after being ghosted so make sure you pay close attention.

When you don’t know these reasons and the text to send, you end up making a mistake and pushing him away once and for all when there’s a chance you could get him back.

MORE: Why is he ignoring me all of a sudden?

Watch The Video: He Ghosted You?!? Text Him THIS Next

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Ghosting someone sucks. However, there’s a lot more than you realize going on here and this solution to how to text a ghoster is actually more important than you think.

When someone ghosts you, it can be the most confusing thing in the world. Especially if everything seemed to be going great so far. Then, poof. He’s gone.

There’s a couple of perfectly normal reasons why this might happen though…

Take The Quiz: Is He Losing Interest?

Click here to take our quick (and shockingly accurate) “Is He Losing Interest” Quiz right now and find out if he’s really losing interest in you…

MORE: The Exact Reasons Why Men Suddenly Disappear

#1: He’s Just Busy

He could simply be dealing with something personal or tackling a really difficult situation at work that he doesn’t want to talk about. You have no real way of knowing and pushing the situation is going to have the opposite effect you are looking for.

A guy will “ghost” if he’s trying to get space and needs to pull back in order to deal with whatever personal issues he’s working through whether it’s stress, a family situation, etc.

The good news here is that if he’s ghosting because he’s busy, that means he still likes you and all hope is not lost. Believe it or not but this is actually a very common situation.

He’s going to pull away in order to keep his issues out of the relationship and not bring that negativity into it because he likes you and wants to keep it that way. So, don’t panic and make a snap decision to start demanding answers or explanations. Give him his space and relax while you find something else to focus on in the meantime.

MORE: Why Guys Disappear and How to Deal

#2: He’s Not Interested And Doesn’t Want To Break It To You

Unfortunately, this one does not have a happy outcome like the last reason he might ghost someone.

You’re probably wondering, “Why did he ghost me? Why can’t he just come out and say he doesn’t like me?”

The simple answer is that men don’t like disappointing women. They don’t like doing or saying things they know will upset you and let you down. In fact, and it might not feel right, they just would rather avoid it altogether.

However, don’t jump to this conclusion immediately. He could simply also fall into the category of #1 or #3 which I will cover in just a moment. So, don’t immediately assume that all of a sudden he doesn’t like you.

If it is this reason, you really can’t stop the ghosting. You can’t force someone to have feelings for you. In this situation, it’s best to just let it go and not give it any more of your time or energy. Leave yourself open for someone better to come along.

Do not waste your time overanalyzing “Why did he ghost me? I don’t know what to do when someone ghosts me.”

Leave it be and move on.

MORE: This Is the #1 Reason Guys Are Ghosting

#3: He’s Having Some Kind Of An Emotional Block

What on earth does that mean?!

It basically means that he’s interested in you still but is having some kind of a hiccup or emotional issue blocking him from jumping in and fully committing.

This could be anything from getting back together if you’re his ex, you guys are long distance, or he’s married and fell out of love with his wife.

As you can see, these emotional blocks could come from a lot of different situations. I don’t like to say “it’s complicated” but these scenarios definitely fit that description. The issue is a lack of clarity.

MORE: He Hasn’t Texted Me in 3 Days! What To Do When a Guy Doesn’t Text You

I’m going to give you the text message that will give you that clarity your situation is lacking so that you can bring it into a clear black and white focus and get your answer of “is he into me or not?”

“Is he ghosting me? Should I text a guy who ghosted me? Is there something wrong with me? What did I do wrong?”

Instead of driving yourself crazy with these questions, all you need is a simple text to get your answer. This text will work but only if he’s actually into you.

Text: “I guess our run is over judging by your lack of a reply. It was fun while it lasted. I’ll remember the [insert memory together whether it’s a song or movie or inside joke, etc.]. We can be friends though!”

You can add in an emoji at the end if you really want to keep it lighthearted and not have the text come off as angry or passive aggressive.

The purpose of this text is that it’s going to jolt him out of his current slumber and ghosting status so that he jumps to reply in reason #1 or #3 as we discussed before.

MORE: What To Do When A Guy Who Ghosted You Texts You And Wants You Back

If he’s truly interested, he doesn’t want to lose that romantic connection to you so he will jump into action to keep the relationship from sliding into platonic friend territory. If he doesn’t want to lose you, he will step up and take action.

He will either reply or he’ll continue to ghost you (scenario #2) but either way you will have your answer. You’ll know whether he was ever truly interested or if it was a casual relationship that ultimately wouldn’t have given you the commitment you want.

Now you get to either continue the relationship and see where it leads or you can move on and leave yourself open for someone to come along who will not ghost you. If he has any interest, this text will bring him back to you.

If you feel that this man is the one you want and he’s slipping away it usually means he’s losing interest and his biology is telling him that he needs to pull away so if you’re worried he’s losing interest, or he’s already disappeared but you want him back, you have to read this right now or risk losing him forever: If He’s Pulling Away, Do This…

Take The Quiz: Is He Losing Interest?

Is He Losing Interest?Take the Quiz

How To Make Him Realize He’s Losing You: Don’t Be Taken For Granted!

Nick Bastion — Fri, 14 Aug 2020 15:57:25 GMT

Today I want to share with you a very valuable asset in any relationship, especially when you feel like a guy is losing interest in you. I’ll reveal the secrets to turn things around and make him think he’s losing you.

The steps I share will help wake him up to just how valuable having are to him so that he finally realizes what he has with you.

You’ll want to pay close attention as I cover the #1 mistake women make in relationships that causes men to take them for granted, stop putting in effort and not treat them like a priority in their life.

If you want to learn how to make him realize he’s losing you so he starts putting in the effort and treating you with priority, enthusiasm and respect, read on for the clear signs he thinks he’s losing you.

Why Make Him Feel Like He’s Losing You?

Now, the question is, why would you want to make a man feel like he’s losing you? When you put him in this position, you learn if he was ever going to reach for you and now is the time that it will happen.

If you don’t make him feel that he actually could lose you, he will take you for granted.

So how do you make him see you as someone he’s going to lose, how to make him realize he needs you, and how to make him regret taking you for granted?

First of all, you stop showing him that you’ll accept a relationship dynamic that isn’t what you want. Second, you spruce up your life. And finally, you generate what I call “Walking Power”.

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MORE: How To Make Him Worried About Losing You Or Make Him Think He Lost You

1: Stop Demonstrating You’ll Settle

The #1 mistake women make is going along with what you aren’t satisfied with in the hopes he changes one day. Men end up pulling away when you give them everything without him having to give anything back in return.

The simple fact is that you are technically single until you are not. If you’re already acting like his committed girlfriend, then there’s no reason for him to invest any more than he already is (or in this case, isn’t).

Take The Quiz: Is He Losing Interest?

Click here to take our quick (and shockingly accurate) “Is He Losing Interest” Quiz right now and find out if he’s really losing interest in you…

It shows him that you’re not going anywhere any time soon and there’s no real chance of him losing you. If you don’t say no to what you don’t want, he will interpret it that you’re willing to accept anything.

On the other hand, when you have a standard of what you want, you stop giving it your all without him putting in effort on his side as well. He has to step up or risk losing you.

You have to be willing to say “No” to what you don’t want and only then will you discover if the person is actually willing to give you what you want. You will either discover that he doesn’t want to lose you and he is willing to have the kind of relationship you really want or you’ll discover that he’s OK with losing you…

MORE: How to Make Him Afraid of Losing You: 8 Ways to Get Through to Him

Obviously the second scenario is disappointing, but in truth it’s still ultimately a good thing. If you discover a guy is unwilling to have the kind of relationship you want to the point where he’s OK with losing you, that’s something you want to know ASAP. It shows you clearly he was never, ever going to come around in the way you really wanted.

We often make the mistake of saying yes to what we don’t want because we are unwilling or afraid to lose something. However, the truth (that most women learn the hard way) is that saying yes to what you don’t want turns out being the more painful option in the long run and wastes a LOT of time as well.

When you develop the wisdom of knowing to say “NO” to what you don’t want is a huge gift in your love life and life in general. It cuts out the time-wasters and instead leaves you open for the right guy to come along with the relationship you truly desire.

Ultimately this step is simple: don’t say yes to a relationship dynamic that you don’t want. Say no and understand that sometimes the other person isn’t willing to compromise or make it work. Sometimes he has to lose you to realize what he had but by that point you will have already been moved on to better things.

The Key To An Easy Relationship

Now, I want to make one point very clear here. There is ultimately ONE thing that determines if your love life is easy, amazing, and perfect. Or, if this isn’t present in your life, it can lead to problems that otherwise wouldn’t exist.

When you don’t have this secret key in your love life, you will feel like something is missing, you have a constant fear of losing him, everything is confusing and you don’t know how to hold on to him or get the kind of relationship you really want.

The key is to have the right perspective in your love life. When you understand this and have the right perspective, everything becomes crystal clear and makes perfect sense.

You will understand what’s going on in his mind (and oftentimes even better than he understands himself!). You find that it’s easy to spot issues and you intuitively feel that you know exactly what to do in any situation. You naturally do the right thing when you need to.

Your love life just WORKS. You don’t have to think about it, you don’t worry about it, it all makes sense and you’re beyond happy with it.

MORE: How Can You Make Your Guy Realize He Is Losing You?

2: Spruce Up Your Life

What do I mean by this? I’ll explain in just a moment. The important thing about this step is that it gives off an attractive vibe and reels a guy in (or back in if he’s losing interest).

It’s as simple as focusing on yourself and living a full life. This means that you’re happy with yourself, what you’re doing, and giving off a positive energy that attracts men because you’re enjoying your life.

It’s a mistake to think that relationships are supposed to make us happy or even can make us happy. We all need to learn how to be and live happily on our own, even when we’re in a relationship.

You can’t expect anyone else to be able to “make” you happy if you don’t first do it for yourself. The best thing you can do for your love life is learn to be awesome at making yourself happy, keeping yourself inspired, entertaining yourself.

This is called emotionally self-sufficient. I’ll be honest with you, I get bored really easily so this is something I’ve learned to do very well. I have taught myself to be entertained and seek out my own enjoyment rather than relying on it from other people.

This is an incredibly powerful step in becoming the type of woman who naturally attracts men and who they come crawling back to when a man realizes he lost a good woman.

Think about it this way, if you’re miserable in your own life, why would someone be interested in that if you’re not even interested in yourself? The magnetic energy that attracts men is being happy with yourself, relaxed, carefree, and just loving life.

Focus on living life to the fullest doing things that light you up and inspire you. Whether it’s working out, learning a skill, following a hobby, whatever. It doesn’t matter as long as you’re enjoying it and you find it interesting. That energy and enthusiasm will seep into every interaction and people will naturally gravitate to you.

MORE: 10 Things To Do To Make A Guy Realize That He’s Losing You

3: Walking Power

The final step to make him realize he needs you, is to have Walking Power.

If you don’t have walking power, he feels and assumes that you’re going to be around forever and that leads to him taking you for granted.

On the other hand, when you have walking power, it forces him to chase you down and lock you down if he truly doesn’t want to lose you out of his life.

Walking power means you are willing to walk away if he’s unwilling or unable to give you what you want. Instead of sticking around forever hoping and wishing for things to change or for you to somehow get him to “come around” and make things the way you want, you say “No thanks. This isn’t what I want. Wish you the best” and you move on.

Instead of spiraling into feelings of fear and worry, you have a mindset of clarity, personal responsibility and what’s practical. You stop burning up your energy trying to keep things going, keep him interested and forcing things to work.

You stop acting as if ending this relationship would be the end of the world or the end of you.

So how do you do this? You withdraw your attention completely and pull back. Essentially, when he takes you for granted ignore him. You’re not being rude about it or putting on a ticked off attitude with him.

You’re simply letting him feel the reality that you have walking power and you’re not afraid to “lose” him because he doesn’t have you in the first place.

Part of walking power means that you keep your options open (assuming you’re not already in a clearly defined “official” relationship with him). This will activate his need to “lock you down” because now he fears losing you.

When he feels like “oh no, I could lose her to someone else. I didn’t realize how much she meant to me”, he springs into action. Note that this only happens if he was every truly interested. If he doesn’t take any action now, he never will which is a win for you because you will no longer waste your time on him.

Keep Your Options Open

The mistake many women make is closing off options because they think that shows a guy he’s special and therefore they are special and he should pick them. However, all this does is put pressure on him to define something with you and it comes off as desperate and needy when you act like a girlfriend before he’s reached that stage.

Men will lock you down only if they feel like they could lose you. Having that clarity and mindset of being single until he clearly locks you down will only make you more desirable in his eyes.

Now, how do you keep your options open? I don’t mean that you have to go out on dates all the time to show him “hey! I’m single! You better lock me down before one of these guys does!”

You simply leave open the possibility. If someone comes along and asks you out and you’re interested, go for it. Remember, you’re effectively single right now UNTIL you are 100% in a clear, committed relationship. No “it’s complicated”, no “casual”, etc. 100% clear commitment together.

Don’t “choose” him before he “chooses” you. That’s the winning perspective to have to make him think he has lost you in order to get him to step up (if he’s going to).

Remember, the next time you find yourself in a situation where the guy is losing interest or you’re afraid of losing him, these three steps will show you how to make a guy realize he lost you and take the actions necessary to win you or that he’s never going to step up in the first place.

It’s these pivotal moments that determine if your relationship ends in heartbreak or you get to live happily ever after so it’s vitally important that you take the next step and read this right now, because at some point the man you want is going to ask himself: Is this the woman I should commit to for the long term? That answer determines everything… Do you know how men determine if a woman is girlfriend material (the type of woman he commits himself to) or if he sees you as just a fling? If not you need to read this next: The #1 Thing Men Desire In A Woman…

The second problem almost all women experience: At some point he starts to lose interest. He doesn’t call you back or he becomes emotionally closed off. He seems like he’s losing interest or pulling away – do you know what to do? If not you’re putting your relationship and the future of your love life in great danger, read this now or risk losing him forever: If He’s Pulling Away, Do This…

Take The Quiz: Is He Losing Interest?

Is He Losing Interest?Take the Quiz

In summary…

Stop demonstrating you’ll settle
Have the right perspective in your love life
Be emotionally self-sufficient
Be prepared to walk away
Keep your options open

Will No Contact Make Him Move On?

Can’t Stop Breaking No Contact?: Get My Private Method Here

You’re probably used to calling your ex all the time, but you may be wondering if that’s actually a good idea. The truth is that the No Contact Rule doesn’t guarantee any response from your ex-boyfriend, but it will give him some space to process his feelings and miss you during radio silence.

For sure, this No Contact break will make him think about the future.

In any breakup, there’s always that question of what’s next. Your guy might not be ready for any relationship, but it’ll make him think about his interests. It might be hard to imagine your ex with someone else. But it’s about your healing process to accept the fact that your ex is likely to move on.

How Will No Contact Make Him Move On?

No Contact will put some distance between you two, which may be good or bad depending on what you hope to accomplish. Some people try to have a rebound relationship as a mechanism to get over their previous relationship. Others focus on their career and put the thought of a romantic relationship aside.

It depends on why your ex-boyfriend decided to break up with you.

The No Contact Rule can be used as a way to cry over the breakup and move on. If you see your ex moving on quickly, you should do the same too. Don’t sit there and cry while you watch your ex with a new girl or achieving success. Use that jealousy to motivate yourself and do the same.

During the first couple of weeks of the No Contact phase, your ex might think deeply about what happened with you two, which could bring up all of his emotions and perhaps make him want to get back with you. It’ll also give you time to think about why things ended and if there’s anything that you could have done differently.

Will My Ex Move On During No Contact?

In any breakup, there’s always that question of what’s next. Your guy might not be ready to start dating again right away, but it’ll make him think about the future. It might be hard to imagine your ex with someone else, but remember that he thought about you with another person in his life before you broke up.

With No-Contact, your ex will be able to ponder your relationship and get him to think about the future.

This is extremely important because if he isn’t ready to date again, this will give him time to get there. No contact will put some distance between you two, which may be good or bad depending on what you hope to accomplish.

The first thing you might want to do is make sure that you don’t try and force him back into the relationship even though he might be trying to move on without you.

Will No Contact Make My Ex Forget About Me?

Most people think that no contact will make their ex completely forget about them, which is not true when it comes to breakups. The majority of the time, people are overcome with emotions during a breakup.

They can really miss their ex and want their ex back, but it’s not always possible because of how much they’re counting on their emotional health and connection with each other. If the attraction is lost, then it’s harder for the two to get back together.

They might be feeling confused and hurt, which can make them seem weak and indecisive. If the breakup was your fault, it’ll probably damage your self-esteem and make you feel defeated.

Falling in love is one of the most amazing feelings imaginable, so no one wants to give that feeling up just because they’re not with the right person for them.

It’s not easy for your ex to forget about you. After all, you were once his best friend and confidante who knows his deepest secrets. Even if the bad relationship ended, you two shared great memories worth cherishing.

What Does Ex Feel During No Contact?

During a breakup, your ex is going to feel a variety of emotions. They might miss you and want you back, or they might feel confused or hurt. They will probably be overly emotional when it comes to the breakup and may not be thinking straight. You must understand what your ex is feeling during this recovery period so that you know for sure if breaking up with them was the right decision.

If your ex misses you and wants to get back together, they will know that they need to make an effort to win you back. If they were really in love with you, they will fight for their relationship and do whatever it takes to get back together.

Does No Contact Make Them Move On?

Rather than thinking about how your ex will react during the No Contact period, it’s best to focus on yourself. After all, you’re given a golden opportunity to restart your life and fulfill your goals. The first few days of No Contact are the hardest, but once you get past them, your life will get better. Your energy will be freed up to do the things you love doing, and your recovery will be so much stronger than if you had stayed in the relationship.

As for your ex-boyfriend, you want him to move on. You want him to forget all the fights and bad memories in your past relationship. Give him some time and space to remove all that anger, frustration, and negativity from his system. If you’re no longer in his life, there shouldn’t be any reason he should still be mad at you.

You want him to think, “What was I even mad about? I miss her!” This is why No Contact works. Not because you know how your ex will react, but because you’re the one who’s putting yourself first and making a huge positive change in your life.

How Long Does It Take For An Ex To Miss You With No Contact?

Breakups don’t happen overnight, so you mustn’t expect your ex to decide in a short period to reach out. Even if it is a clean break, give yourself a couple of weeks to recollect your emotions.

When people break up, they have a lot of work to do and take time to terms with their feelings.

If you were in love with someone, they would probably think about you constantly during the breakup. They’ll think about how they feel and what they want to do. They should not be making any decisions about their life during the breakup because it can be a confusing time for them. In the beginning, your ex will probably have feelings of hurt and sadness.

You must be patient with your ex during radio silencebecause it can take a while for them to put all of their feelings into words and make decisions on what they want out of life and if they still love you or not.

How Do You Know If No Contact Is Working?

You can’t always tell if no contact is working as you can’t see what’s going on inside your ex’s head, but you can know if they’re trying to get back together by the way that they talk to you. If they seem to be trying to get back together during no contact, then it’s probably because of how much they’ve missed you and how much your relationship meant to them.

If they’re not trying to get back together, then they probably will act indifferent. They may not seem as interested in getting back together and can be a bit cold toward you. It’s common for people to take a step back after a breakup, so they don’t seem as excited and eager about the relationship as they did when you two were together.

No contact can effectively bring your ex back while also giving both of you time to heal.

Will He Lose Feelings During No Contact?

Your ex-boyfriend can lose feelings during the No Contact phase because it can get kind of pointless for him to think about you. Plus, your ex will probably get distracted. During No Contact, you’re not talking to each other, and so you won’t be thinking about each other as much.

This will give him some time to miss you, and your ex might reach out the first couple of times. Give him some space to let him about what he wants out of life.

This could mean that he’ll lose feelings for you after a while. It will be up to your ex to decide how he feels about you. You can’t force someone to love you, so you need to accept that no contact isn’t going to go your way.

Will He Miss Me If I Stop Texting Him?

Yes, your ex will miss you if you stop texting him. This is because he will be used to talking to you all the time and having someone to who he can vent. Even though your relationship was over, it’s still hard for people to break up with their ex-lover, and so they will hold on to any sense of hope that they can get from being in contact with them.

If you text your ex about something neutral, it could make them feel happy and hopeful. They may think that they still have a chance with you and want to spend more time with you. They might forget about the breakup because of your texts and be willing to work things out between you two.

Does Silence Make A Man Miss You?

Your ex will miss you if you stay silent and stop talking to them. They might feel hurt, as your former flame might think that you’re breaking up with them for good. This could mean that your ex-partner starts going out more or being more social in an attempt to get over their feelings for you.

How do I know if my ex misses me?

Your guy will miss you a little bit if he thinks about you and wonders what’s going on with his life without a girlfriend. He probably thinks about your relationship all of the time, so he’ll probably miss the stability and comfort you provided.

Give him time to think about what he wants to do in his life without you around. He’ll probably need some space from any drama or stress during his breakup.

He might also miss having someone around who’s just happy for him and loves him unconditionally.

Do Guys Move On During No Contact?

Ultimately, guys will move on during No Contact. They probably still have feelings for you and, at some point, will want to get back together with you. They won’t want to talk about you because they’ll probably be thinking about how they feel and question their decision to break up with you. They might also ask why they broke up with you in the first place.

Sometimes guys will think a lot about why they broke up with you, which could put them at odds with their friends and family, who won’t know what’s going on in your ex’s mind.

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Will No Contact Make Him Move On

However, you have a valid point in questioning if the no contact rule would cause problems. So, what exactly is the no contact rule? Is it possible that he may move on or lose interest in you if you do not contact him? The no contact rule is utilized after a breakup or when you are taking a break from your boyfriend while in a relationship, to put it simply.

So, rather than assisting your ex in moving on, maintaining no contact delays or even reverses that process. Following and calling your ex is what will really force them to move on – and they will be on the run when you do this! It will be difficult to maintain complete isolation.

Will he lose feelings during no contact?

The answer is a resounding yes. Your ex-boyfriend misses you in the same manner he did when he was in a relationship with you… Consistently inconsistent The goal of no contact is to remove yourself from a toxic relationship and avoid being triggered by someone who has caused you grief in order to recover and move ahead. You are already aware of this, but it is important to understand why. During the period of no contact, does he seem to miss me?

Do guys move on during no contact?

Will the lack of contact cause him to move on? If a guy disappears from your life for many weeks or months, it is possible that he has moved on. Additionally, if you continue to pursue him throughout the period of no contact, he may decide to leave. If he really cares about you, the no contact rule will compel him to seek you out and confront you.

What happens to a man during no contact?

In their hearts, men are obstinate creatures, and they will frequently hold out hope that you will reach out to them at some time during the no contact period. The fact that they start out expecting you to reach out first, and then throw a tantrum when that does not happen, only to end up hoping that you would reach out to them first, is fascinating.

Many ladies are concerned about whether he will return if they leave him alone. It is generally true because when you leave him alone, he will have a more optimistic perspective on the relationship since you are exhibiting the following characteristics.

What are the stages of no contact?

These are the five phases that your ex-partner should anticipate to go through when under a no contact rule.

They maintain their composure and are confident in their decision (3 Days To A Week)

When They Do not Hear From You, You Should Be Worried (Week To 2 Weeks)

When they realize that they are being ignored, they get enraged (2 Weeks To 2.5 Weeks)

Confrontation with Regards to What They Have Lost (2.5 Weeks to 3 Weeks)

Will he miss me if I stop texting him?

He will miss you if you do not stop texting him. You will begin to miss a man if you do not constantly text him and he starts to realize that you are not contacting him as often as you used to be. It takes a lot of courage for some men to begin to put aside their egos and express their longing for a lady they are interested in.

When a man is thinking about you during this time period, he will be torn between two opinions. On the one hand, the no contact rule implies that he is not allowed to speak directly to you. But he truly wants to connect out to you on a deeper level than that. Many men may resort to social media at this time to post music and inspirational remarks.

Does silence make a man miss you?

Men do miss you when you are silent, particularly if they have come to take you for granted or have lost interest after you have chased them around the room. Because the dread of losing one’s life may cause any man to re-evaluate his conduct, silence is very effective.

As you can see, individuals that are obstinate are also stubborn when it comes to obtaining what they desire. As a result, no contact is intended to demonstrate to your ex that living without you, not hearing from you, and having you removed from their lives is not what they want. No contact is intended to demonstrate to even the most obstinate individuals what they want the most and what they are most afraid of losing. Is the No Contact Rule Effective Against a Reluctant Ex?

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Will No Contact Make Him Move On

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