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I throw a redirect up on this as soon as this thing (i don’t know, some thing, i can’t explain it) gets fixed that lets me do that.

I’ve had the hardest time finding a blog theme I’m totally happy with.

Mainly, I like big photos.  Yes, I know, you people with slow internet might now, but it’s my blog.  And when I print it, and keep it at the end of the year, I like nice big photos on my pages.  That is the main goal of this thing after all.

So I’m trying this theme out.

I hate the look of it.  It’s so……’bought my theme at Target and 40 million people have the same one’.

Can’t customize it at all.

Let’s see how it handles pictures…

(that’s our wedding. just over 5 years ago.)

—————-

Well, the big photos fit.  But I don’t like the way the text looks.  At all.  (This is on the Rounded theme…for everyone that comes by after I’ve tried another.

Another interesting night at so.zo for me.  Last week….while I might not have dealt with the situation all that well, at least the end result was good.  This week….uh….not so much.

First off, I want to say that retrospect sucks.  To be able to look and see that what you did wasn’t really right…but not to be able to go back and do anything about it.  Not that I’m sure what the right thing to do would have been at this point.

Basically, one of the homeless guys came in.  He needed more help than we could give (and didn’t want help at all, he just wanted cash).   And I didn’t deal with it all that well.  First, I let him harrass and scare off a couple groups of customers.  One of them will probably be back (church ladies…who were very sympathetic and understanding)…the other group….well, I don’t know that they will be back.  Really sad, that one.  A group of college girls, all dressed up to go party….but decided to hang out at so.zo instead.

And the homeless guy himself…yeah, messed that up too.  I ended up having to call the police, which I really think only made things worse.

So, since I can’t go back in time and fix things…now I’m pondering if there’s anything I can do to improve upon the mess….or at least how to handle things better next time.

Should I have just given the guy the money he wanted??  I mean, I did have my own cash….a rarity for me…but I could have given it to him.  It was pretty clear that he didn’t need it for peroxide (which was what he was claiming) and that because more obvious as the evening progressed.  What he wanted the money for would have done a disservice to himself, but it would have kept the other patrons from being harrassed.  Besides, who am I just say what he should do for himself.  Aren’t we taught to give…generously, indiscriminately?  I’m not sure that’s the answer though…to give him money for drugs.  How would that help anything?  And worse, would it have just prolonged the inevitable?  Taught him that he could come in and harass the volunteers there for money anytime he needed a fix and made him someone else’s problem later in the week?

What if I hadn’t called the cops?  Would he have eventually gone on his way, without a second scene?  Is ignoring the problem going to solve anything though?  It generally doesn’t.

Should I have called them sooner?  I was really unsure what to do once he started getting belligerant.   Since he wan’t physically hurting a person…just swearing and angry and slamming stuff around…it’s hard to say where to to draw that line.  All I did was try nicely and a little firmly (though maybe not firm enough) ask him to leave.  I only called the cops after it was clear that while he may have gone outside…he wasn’t leaving the steps.

Should I have called them back after he came in the second time and threatened everyone?  Would it have done any good that time when it didn’t the first time?

Eek.  I don’t know. I can’t imagine what got him to that place (living on the streets).  If it was a mental condition or drugs that made him so unreasonable.  Whatever state he was in…he didn’t want the food that was offered, didn’t really want the coffee that was offered, didn’t want the advice to walk down the street and get his wound cared for.  So how do you help someone that has so totally fallen into the cracks….or possibly even jumped in headfirst?  I know that me asking, then telling him to leave, then calling the cops….that couldn’t have felt good to him.  What an awful place to be in.  How can we show compassion without helping him dig his own grave?

I have no clue.  I just feel like I’m really in over my head here.  I don’t know how to help him.  I barely know how to make the coffee we serve.  But I’m certainly not ‘letting my light shine’.  That’s what was talked about in church today.  It’s just so frustrating.  I’m willing to help.  I want to help.  I just don’t know how.

I have a whole stack of books I found in the library today.  I’m kinda hoping that I’ll find some answers there….but really….there are just something things you can’t figure out by reading them in a book.

(just a warning….this post is not for the faint of….ears?  eyes??  thought???  whatever.  if you’re uh, conservative….or don’t have young kids….just click on by)

There’s always this debate (in the parenting community as a whole, and my household in general) in what….uh…terms to teach kids for certain body parts.  Jordan never much cared what he had in his pants.  He termed it “the pee pee” and moved on with no more thought to it.

Celia…she’s gotta know.  Everything.  Very specific.

Generally, for the longest time she’d been referring to everything down below as her ‘body’.  Okay, whatever.  We knew what she meant.

Then one day, she cornered me, and quite specifically asked about one particular part of her body.  Much to my husband’s horror, I told her what that part is called.  So now, she’s taken the name of that one particular part and applied it to all her girly bits.  So my three year old will tell you when she’s got a problem with her ‘bagina’.  Or tell you that we don’t put soap in ‘da bagina’ when taking a bath.  She’s very clear about that.  And the parents who push using medical terminology with your kids so they can be specific about their body parts would be horrified to learn that Celia is using it all wrong again.

Whatever.  We still know what she means.

Welllllll, a few nights ago she started complaining about going pee.  She was having a hard time.  And I noticed her kinda…grabbing…down there and asked her about it and she said it was bothering her.  So…we called the peed and told them she needed to come pee int he cup and rule out a UTI.  Those aren’t the kinda things you mess around with.

We go into see our ped, who is a very nice guy.  Like, I don’t know if he has kids, but in my little category of people in my head, he fits into the ‘cool dad’ category.  And in case you didn’t know, I’m a total prude.  In a big way.

After the whole peeing in the cup debacle (and it’s always a debacle when you try to get a clean catch from a 3 year old girl in the ped’s office bathroom) we go in and he needs to check out the area.  He has Celia lay down, then explains to her what it is he needs to check.  But he obviously want to make sure she’s clear what he needs to do, and wants to use her terms, so he says:

“Okay Cecelia.  You lay down here and I’m just going to take a quick look at your bottom?  pee pee?  What word does she use for this, mom?”

And then he looks at me.

And I mumble “Uhhh, vagina” with absolute horror.

I don’t know what is worse.  The fact that I had to say “vagina” in front of a ‘cool dad’ type person, or the fact that my daughter refers to her entire below the belt girly area as a vagina….when that whole area is not really called a vagina.

She doesn’t have a UTI.

I’m sitting in my livingroom (okay, laying, lazy lazy, you caught me) with sunglasses on.

The light burned out and all we had are the super bright ‘daylight’ bulbs that are as blue and florescent as a cheap office.

It’s bad.

Yeah, I kinda let my ‘40 weeks to a better home’ things crash.  I am still working on it….it just isn’t necessarily an every week thing. Home Improvement Fail??

Anyway, Chris has a ton a vacation that he needs to take before the end of the year, so he was off last week.  As you well know, he’s not really into the home improvement thing.  So I let him play Mr. Mom all week while I got some stuff done.

I managed to get the upper part of the family room painted, and the lower part of Celia’s room.  It’s going to look really nice…but I still need to pick a color for the lower part of the family room/upper part of the bathroom.  Basically, the bathroom has crappy textured walls 5 ft up.  I hate them.  We all hate them.  The kids are always scrathing their elbows on the wall.  So my plan is to put up white beadboard in there.  The paneling in the kid’s rooms will be painted white from 5′ down (papered flat and painted above that) and a little chair rail/ledge will go up in all rooms up there.

The family room is the exception.  Since it’s got the sloped ceiling on one side, it’s hard to know where to stop painting wall, and start painting ceiling.  So I painted 5′ and above white (ceiling too) and the bottom part of the wall will be a color up there.  I just don’t know WHAT color.  Probably a shade of blue.  I don’t know yet.

I also got the dining room table painted.  After a small varnish snafu (and resanding) it looks pretty good.  Not great.  But better than before.

Chris really got a dose of my life on Thursday and Friday.  Thursday I had a MOPS steering team meeting in the morning….and since Jordan had to be picked up at 3, I just stayed in Morgantown.  So we got home around 3:30…then I left AGAIN to go to Mom’s Night Out.  I did feel a little bad about that..especially seeing as how he looked totally wiped out and braindead after a day as me (it was like looking into a mirror).  And he goes out golfing many Thursdays after having worked all day, so I’m trying not to let the guilt get to me too much.  He did put on a happy face and not complain, so that was nice.  And I had a fabulous time (we went to a Japanese Teahouse that puts ‘bubbles’ in their teas.  I was too scared to try the bubbles, but my Coconut Milk Tea was very good).  Friday I was gone all day with Jordan’s class field trip (and Celia was home all day….no preschool on Fridays!) so….it was a long day.  Hopefully he’s not regretting his ‘vacation at home’ too much.  He does have some top secret computer project he’s working on (and took over my new dining room table with…space that I *need* to get started on my backlog of craft stuff this week!!)

So this week:

Paint the upper part of Celia’s room.

Pick a color for the familyroom/bathroom.

TONS of yummy fall baking.

A wedding guestbook/scrapbook for one of my mom’s friends.

Start my pillow project.  I have an idea for these pillow to make for Celia for Christmas.  They are throw pillows….but kinda look like they are wearing little vests.  Four of them, one will zip, one with snap, one will button up, and one will be laced and tied like a shoe.  So she can practice those skills (she really wants to learn them…weird kid).  I’ll take lots of pictures to share of that project because a few people have asked about it.

Paint the table leaves (forgot those last week!!)

Bathe the dog.  Again.  He stinks.  Can someone please tell me WHY he currently stinks??  We just had him at the groomers on Tuesday.  I should have at least a few weeks before he starts smelling like stinkin’ dog again….but here he is, reeking up my house.

….instead of the trivial.  For once.

So I’ve been doing the so.zo thing for over a year.  And I love it, I do.  But honestly this week is the first time that I’ve experienced the actuall mission of it….to be there for people in need.  Usually I just make coffee.

First off….both the volunteer and I almost called in sick.  I ate WAY too many cookies and was feeling under the weather.  She ran for 13 miles and it wrecked her (yeah…what a comparison).  But we both ended up being there.

It was quiet, and really slow all night.  Thankfully WVU won their football game (I honestly would have been scared to be there if they had lost) which just meant that everyone outside was crazy.

Early on in the evening it started raining and two guys came in…just wanting to know if it was okay to hang out and get in out of the rain.  They did the usual “this place is so cool, what is this place??” thing for awhile, then sat down to talk.  They were from out of town and were in for the game.  Were totally out of their element on High Street….but trying to fit in (in maybe an unhealthy way).  They sat down and talked with us for a good half an hour.  Turns out they were really nice boys, go to church every week back home.  We just talked general stuff….about what they were going to school for….what we (me, the volunteer and her friend) do….and what was going on outside (the wave of scantily clad drunk people making their way to the bars).

I have no clue where they went when they joined their friends and left.  Maybe even joined the wave of people (they had already been drinking, so….) but it was a really interesting conversation….and I think it made them wonder about what it was they were trying to be a part of.

Then all was quiet for a few more hours, we just sat around and talked.  About 11:30 a guy came in…all by himself.

I jumped up and went behind the counter and asked him what I could get for him, and he looked at me with these big, scared eyes….stammered for a minute, then said “I don’t know how to get home.”

I wasn’t really sure how to respond.  Sometimes we have homeless people come in and say that they are trying to get home…just need a little money for a bus ticket, etc.

But he didn’t look homeless.  And it didn’t sound like that’s what he was asking for.

So I asked him how I can help him to get home….and he just shook his head.  He didn’t know.  I asked where home was, if he lived in Morgantown….he didn’t know.  He was just terribly disoriented…and kinda frightened.

I got him some coffee….hoping maybe that would help.  And we’re starting to wonder what it is he was there for.  I mean…was he going to try and rob us to have money to get home?  He didn’t seem violent, but you never know.  Should we call the police?  Should we call for an ambulance? I mean he’s up, and walking, and awake…but just about completely unable to function…and I think he knew it.  His eyes were really…there….but he couldn’t seem to make his mind catch up.

We finally got him talking a little.  Found out he did not live in town.  He did have friends, but could not tell us their names.  He lost his cell phone.  He couldn’t remember his parents number, or any phone number.  he gave us his wallet.  Took everything in it out.  Gave us all his credit cards, all his ID, everything…asking us to help call someone.

There was nothing in there though.  Nothing to help us find someone to call.

Finally he spit out his girlfriend’s name.  We ran her name and state through zabasearch and thankfully, she was the only person with that name.

So I called her house….and woke up her mom.  Who was very very polite…and I felt so bad because I knew I was just scaring her to death.  I wasn’t really sure what to say…so I told her who we had there.  She was very worried because they were supposed to be together, and we had no clue where she was.  I explained that he was lost, didn’t have his cell, and was very….out of it.  She was very concerned, asked to talk to him.

I gave the phone to him and it was heartbreaking to hear this grown man (he was a professional, not a college student) say to her “I’m so sorry.  I’m so lost.      Will you please come and get me.”

That was all he could say.  He had no clue what had happened to him…or where the girlfriend was.  He gave the phone back…the mom said she would call the girl’s cell then call us back.

After that he started getting a little more lucid…and terribly apologetic.  Was totally clueless how he came to be in this situation.

A few minutes later the girlfriend came in.  She was really upset, crying…and more than a little angry.  And they left. Just like that.

By this time it was REALLY late.  And we were just so glad to have helped him.

But then all during the drive home….I kept thinking about them.  And just worrying…if i was okay just to let them go like that.  I mean…were they with others that would help them get home?  What if there was something really wrong with him and it went unnoticed because of the oddness of the situation.

I talked with someone at church today and the didn’t think it would be too weird if I called to follow up….so I did (I did look up the mom’s name first, so I’d at least know who to ask for this time).  She was still very nice (thank goodness).  They did make it home, safely.  They are still really not sure what happened…thinking that maybe someone put something in one of his drinks.  He and the girlfriend had been together all evening, until they got seperated…and she really didn’t think he’d drank enough to damage him like that.

Honestly…I didn’t think it was just him being drunk either.

In any case…everything worked out okay.  I felt totally out of my element though.  And it really gave me pause to hear him say “I don’t know how to get home.”

So I guess that part of what we’re all about.  Trying to help people get home.  Physically, or spritually….or sometimes both.  I know I didn’t do anything for him spiritually (other than pray)….but at least we helped him find his physical home.

I got to chaperone a field trip for Jordan’s class the other day.

Before I get into the details of the trip, can I just say once again how much I love anything having to do with his new school??  This was probably the best field trip I have EVER been on.  And it’s just such a nice group to travel with.  The teachers are nice, the other parents are nice, all the kids were so nice, normal and well behaved.  It was awesome.  And I forgot my camera, go figure.  I’m SO mad about that.  And I think I want to take our family back up there, just to get pictures if nothing else.  It was that neat.

So the trip itself was to Meadowcroft, which I had never heard of before.  It’s in southwest Pennsylvania.  There’s a rock shelter there (kinda like a cave….but not really) where they’ve found human artifacts from 12,000 years ago.  At the rock shelter itself, they have built a really nice cover and platform for visitors to stand and view the dig.  Everything is labeled and they have a lighting system set up so the presenter can easily point out different areas and finds.  Coolest part of that is that it all came from a guy finding some junk in a ground hog hole.  First some old soda cans, then an old tool (that turned out to be a Native American tool).  Honestly, if I were strolling around my property (not that I have property, but you know) dug up a hole and found some stuff….I would never think to call someone to come and look at it.  But this guy did, and the stuff they found was pretty amazing.

There’s also a 19th Century Villiage, which we didn’t get to see, but I’m sure is very neat.

They also have an Indian Villiage.  It was perfect for the kids, very hands on.  I learned a ton of stuff I didn’t know about live before the Europeans came to America.  They had four different stations for the kids to go to in groups.

The first we went to was about agriculture.  We learned all about how farming was done before the european methods (straight, orderly rows, modern tools, etc).  They had to kill the trees by damaging a ring around the base of the tree (they had no metal tools, no axes to cut trees down) then burn the tree to bring it down.  I could take several years just for one tree.  Then they would spread the ashes on the soil as fertilizer and the women would break the soil with sharpened walking sticks.   They planted the Three Sisters crops….and we’re SO doing that in our garden next year.  We were planning on trying corn anyway, and we already grow squash.  I’m excited.  Basically, you plant the corn in a hill.  When the corn gets about a foot tall, you plant beans and have the grow up the corn.  Once the beans have a decent start, plant squash.  The corn provides a frame for the beans to climb.  The beans put nitrogen back in the soil (corn depletes the soil of nitrogen) and the squash grows large leaves that shade the soil, keep moisture in and make it hard for leaves to grow.  The Native Americans didn’t know any of the science behind it….they just knew it worked.  Very neat.

Then we got to learn how to throw spears with an atlatl.  I hit the moose.  With the feather end of the spear.  The kids were impressed nonetheless.

The third station was all about life in the villiage.  How the wigwams were built, the villiage walls.  How they used every bit of the animals and plants and created very little waste.  Relationships and trading rituals with other villages.

The forth station was…..what to do with the animal once you got them with the spear.  How they skinned and preserved animals.  They had a huge display of animal skins for the kids to ewww and ahhh over.  Even a skunk.  And a bear.  And a teeny white weasel.  Most of them….I don’t know how they do this.  They are removed all in one piece.  So what’s left is like….a leftwarmer almost.  Only it’s an animal.  Some of the more brave kids stuck their hands right up there like they were puppets.  Kinda gross.  But also neat.  I was content to just pet (and hand out the sanitizer when we finished).

Anyway, if you’re within driving distance….this is worth a visit.  Well worth it.  They are open to visitors on weekends and the admission is really reasonable ($10 adults, $5 school children, under 6 is free)

I hate you.  I hate you i hate you I HATE YOU.

I just thought you should know that.  You’ve been on my dislike list for a very long time (oh, since that february where we didn’t have water for two week.  remember that?  well I do.) but you’ve really done it now.  I don’t think I can EVER forgive you this time.

We are people of modest means.  And I’ve been SO frugal lately, not buying stuff we don’t need.

But when we finally got our downstairs bathroom done, I thought we needed new towels as a reward for all our hard work.  And since Chris had just raved over the soft, fluffy whiteness of the towels at the Bellagio, that’s what I decided to get.  White, fluffy towels.  Big ones.  Expensive ones.  Well deserved cushy towels for all out hard work saving, paying down debt, and getting that bathroom done.

So what did you go and do?!?!?  Something that filled the water lines with dirty, nasty water.  When?  On Monday….MY WHITE CUSHY FLUFFY TOWEL WASHING DAY.  THEY ARE RUINED.  JUST RUINED.  NASTY BROWN SPOTS AND STRIPES.    It looks like some ogre wiped his butt on my bathtowels.

Can you not give a person notice??  A little letter in the mail or automated phone call or something?  SOMETHING???

And I know it was you.  Don’t try to deny it.  Oh….I didn’t figure it out in time to save my towels, but hindsight is 20/20.  The funky looking water in the upstairs toilet yesterday that made me wonder if someone had a butt explosion they ought to tell me about…..but Celia claimed she knew nothing of.  That poor girl was interrogated half the morning on if she felt okay when it wasn’t her at ALL.  And the lovely surprise bubbles in the water line that make the water sputter and spray when I least expect it today.  Yeah, that’s you too.

You are on my list now.  It’s ON.

(please ignore the mess.  it was a busy day of painting and such, but not much cleaning going on)