Speaking of, there’s a great giveaway for a thermal tote going on right now!

Imagine our surprise when we sat down to watch ABC’s Modern Family last night and Lily (the little girl on the show, who is supposed to be around 2-3 years old) dropped the f-bomb.  Seeing her father giggle in response to this only causes her to drop the bomb several more times, and eventually drop it very publicly at a family wedding.  It was a different word than the one we are battling, but the same problem.  We giggled throughout the episode and thought to ourselves, “We’ve been there.”  The episode ended and I didn’t think about it again.

Until this morning when it was splashed across media websites that various parent groups and an anti-profanity organization known as the No Cussing Club, wanted the episode pulled.  From the articles I read, these groups were not only upset that the word was used by a toddler, but also chastised the adult characters’ reactions to use of the word.  One organization in particular wanted ABC to know that people don’t want to hear a toddler drop the f-bomb.

I have so many responses to this, sit tight people, this could turn into a bit of a rant.

While I fully support anyone who wants to join or start an anti-profanity club (everyone has to have their niche, right?), I can’t help but notice that this club is headed by, McKay Hatch, an 18 year old man, who does not have children.  While he started the club as a child at merely 14 years old, he was far removed from his own toddler years.  News flash, toddlers don’t exactly do what you tell them or react as you want them to.

Unless you plan to live your life in a bubble and introduce them to no one other than your very closest family members (who you will probably still have to censor), kids are going to learn and repeat somethings that you don’t approve of.  For example, my 2 year old runs around singing “Shake, shake, shake your booty”, when I don’t use the word “booty” and have never, ever sung/played the song around her.  Other people find it hysterical, which is why she continues to do it.  I’m mortified, but cannot physically stop her from doing it.  She no doubt picked the behavior up from others and continues it based on adults’ reactions that she receives.  In fact, the other night as I was making dinner, I heard Greenleigh trying to teach her baby sister how to shake her booty.  So there you go, no audience necessary and she continues the behavior that I try so desperately to stop.

To Mr. Hatch,  I understand your intentions are good, but you lack experience in this arena.  Karma will find you.  I promise.  Maybe not cursing, but one day you will have a child who will say or do something that you find offensive, inappropriate, or vulgar.  Something you said that your children would never do.  It’s just the way it goes.  Even though I have modified my behavior in response to our situation, she has learned it and it’s suck in place, at least for a while.

Oh, and for the record, no one wants to hear a child drop the f-bomb.  Seriously.  It’s embarrassing as a parent, especially in a public setting.  I sincerely doubt that the episode last night prodded parents across the nation to wake their kids up this morning and teach them a brand new explicit word to see how cute they would sound saying it.

But sometimes you can’t stifle your real reaction to what your child is doing fast enough and you accidentally encourage them.  They do something inappropriate and your first inclination is to laugh, but you know you are supposed to be the disciplinarian because what they did was inappropriate or wrong.  Sometimes you just don’t get the “disciplinarian face” on fast enough and your kids catch your real reaction.  Your human, it’s going to happen.  But kids are funny like that.  They will remember your first reaction, no matter how hard you try to tell them it never happened.   I just think it’s a little insane to say that ABC was trying to encourage kids saying the f-bomb by allowing a character to have a “genuine” reaction to it.  Sure, he tried to stifle it, but not fast enough and Lily caught on.  The purpose of the episode wasn’t to glorify 2 year olds cursing, but rather to depict an experience that most parents encounter at one time or the other.  Parents are humans.  We have immediate reactions to things and we make mistakes, but at the end of the day we do our best.

But to pull the episode?  I pray that ABC does no such thing.  First, the damage is done.  Lily has already dropped the bleeped out f-bomb on prime time, national television.  We all saw it.  It’s done.  Even if ABC pulled the episode from ever airing again on television, it has to be somewhere on the internet.  People will find it if they want to.

It should be noted that Aubrey Anderson-Emmons (the little girl who plays Lily) never even said the word.  According to ABC, she used the word “fudge” when taping the episode.  No kids were actually “harmed” in the taping of the episode.  It was all left up to our imagination as to what the bleeped out word was.

Most importantly, what Modern Family did last night is to paint a portrait of what real parents go through.  I identified with it.  I felt their pain, even though they’re only actors.  Do you remember family sitcoms of the 1980s?  I do.  Most wouldn’t have touched a topic of cursing.  Sure, they had their rebel children or occasionally spotlighted a serious issue like drinking, eating disorders, gambling or the like, but often the avoided the messy but all to common daily problems families face.  Like when your child does something inappropriate.  What happened last night on Modern Family was not a shiny, perfect version of family sitcoms of the 1980’s who hit the occasional bump in the road to highlight a particular social issue, but rather what a real modern family of 2012 encounters on a daily basis.  Why paint a portrait of parenthood that isn’t real?  Please don’t take real issues that I identify with out of a show I watch and love.

So I think I’m going to wrap this up before it becomes more of a rant than it already is.  Naturally, I’m in no way encouraging kids of any age cursing.  Nor am I encouraging adults cursing for that matter.  I would just hate for networks to think that parent groups who want the episode pulled speak for all of us, because they don’t.  Some of us found comfort and humor in a television show portraying a family issue we are dealing with as a modern family.

Fast forward to last week, when they started construction on this:and from the inside:It’s an igloo!  I have absolutely no idea what the educational lesson is (perhaps a unit on Eskimos or just the fact that it actually gets cold in other parts of the world?), but it’s pretty cool.

The last sign I saw said that they still needed 25 jugs.  You can see that they still have a little to fill in around the door:I love that they are always thinking of special projects like this to keep the kids interested.

Smash cake at Greenleigh's 1st Birthday, April 2010

It’s that time of year – Time to start planning Hazeline’s first birthday party!  She’s going to be ten months old in just a few days, which means I don’t have much time.  How did time get away from me (again)?  Two months sounds like plenty of time, but currently I have nothing planned.  I need to find a location, choose a theme, find invitations, get them printed, send them out, select a cake…the list goes on and on.  So much to do, so little time.  And Greenleigh’s birthday is less than 30 days after Hazeline’s, so there are 2 parties in our near future.  Oh yeah, and I haven’t done any planning for Greenleigh’s party either.

First things, first.  Since Hazeline’s birthday falls first on the calendar I decided to start brainstorming for her party over the weekend.  Maybe we’ll have it at a park?  But what if it rains?  It’s South Florida after all.  Do I get a bounce house for the older kids to enjoy?  Speaking of, what theme are we going for?  I roughly put together an entire farm animal theme (complete with petting zoo), only to take it apart again to explore a more unconventional theme.  Greenleigh’s first birthday was completely custom theme, and although it was tough to get the invitations and decor, I loved that she had an “original” pink and purple dinosaur birthday party.  Better yet, Hazeline’s only going to be one year, does there need to be a theme at all?  Is turning one a theme in and of itself?  I went around and around, and ended up settling on nothing.

But it did get thinking about friends who have kids around the same age as our girls.  I started to notice that a few of them had no parties at all.  At first, I thought maybe we just weren’t invited, but in a several instances we were actually told that there would be no party.  One or two decided to forgo the party due to finances and another family decided to use the money for a family trip to Disney World, both of which are totally understandable, but I couldn’t help but notice that a few just skipped the party altogether.

Skip the party?  Why would anyone do such a thing?

I’ll admit, when I was little, my parties were a little over the top.  My mom had a professional plan my parties and they were extreme – character appearances, custom cakes, ginormous props…I specifically remember a dog house going up in our front yard for my Snoopy themed birthday party when I was 3 or 4 years old.

As we got a little older, the parties were toned down a little, but my mom still went out of her way to make our birthday’s special.  We always had breakfast in bed while we opened our presents, got to plan activities during the day if there wasn’t school or brought special treats to school if school was in session, and got our favorite dinner that night with cake.  And we always had a party.  In college, birthday parties stopped, but there was always a celebration.  There was always an attempt to make that day special and different than all the others.

When Greenleigh was born, I got excited about birthday parties once again.  I had a strong desire to outdo my mom’s party planners.  The theme, invitations, and cake for her party were all picked out before she turned 4 months old.  I wish I were kidding.  I’m a bit of a planner, but I’ll admit, I was a little out of control.  God bless my husband for nodding and smiling through it all.

Greenleigh’s first birthday party was done entirely in a pink and purple dinosaur theme, complete with matching invitations and banners, dino shaped chicken nuggets for lunch, a character appearance, and musical entertainment for the kids.  I won’t tell you it was perfect (I forgot juice boxes and water bottles for the kids, novice parent mistake since my child didn’t drink from juice boxes yet), but I really tried to make it a special and amazing day for my child.  I also felt that this day was a day to celebrate my husband and I making it through the sleepless nights, growing pains, and teething that the first year brings.  Our party was a family celebration, and I wanted everyone who had ever met my child there.  At one point Erajh had to talk me down from inviting the pediatrician and daycare teachers, because I was sure they would want to be there.

After that first birthday, Erajh asked if I always planned to go overboard for her parties.  “Of course,” I relied.  Hey, at least I’m honest.  And sure enough, I followed up with another great Elmo extravaganza birthday (complete with after party) for her second birthday.

But not throwing a party at all?  Or only having a cake after a normal day and dinner?  How can that be?  Why not celebrate?  I mean, I don’t judge a parent for not having a party for their child’s birthday, I just don’t understand it.  Unless it’s a religious or financial reason, I don’t understand why you wouldn’t want to go to extremes have a party.  Why not have a few people over to recognize this special day?  Why not distinguish this day from all the others on the calendar in a big way?

How do you celebrate your kids birthdays?  Big party or no party?  And if your answer is no party, why?

Every year I wait for these holidays – Martin Luther King Day, President’s Day, and Veteran’s Day (this year Columbus Day was added to the list as well).  These are days when the girls’ daycare is open, but my office is closed.  These days are few and far between, but they are days where I can be super productive.  I have to take advantage of these opportunities, because it’s pretty much the only time I can run a quick errand or take time shopping for things for myself.

Unfortunately, today was spent cleaning.  Remember how I said that I wanted to be a little cleaner this year?  Well, today was the day.  And I really hate to clean.  More than just about anything in the world.  But the Christmas tree needed to come down (yes, yes, I know, what in the world was it still doing up in mid-January) and Hazeline’s clothes needed to be organized.  I can’t believe how fast she’s growing – she’s already in 12 month clothes and could probably move up to 12-18 month clothes!  It took several hours, but we eventually got all of the 3-6 and 6-9 clothes sorted, moved into plastic storage bins, and put back in the closet.  Oh, and the closet was a mess, so that needed some work too.

Today I wish I could have relaxed or spent time doing something fun with the girls, but seriously what’s the chance that I would have accomplished half of this with a toddler and infant running around?

This was just the beginning. I should have taken a picture of the bins before putting them in the closet. That little girl has way too many clothes!

Absolutely none.  How stay at home moms do it, I will never know.

At the time that “The Call” came in, I was already late leaving the office for a client’s medical exam and the next morning I was expected before a federal judge to pick a date for trial to begin next week.  Hours of trial preparation, clients flying in from afar, and conference calls were in my future, not taking care of a sick child.   “I don’t have time for my kids to be sick”, I thought.  In an effort to plan, I mentally went through all that needed to be done in the next few days and tried to think about how everything could be rearranged.  What was Erajh’s schedule like?  Maybe we could work something out.  We have to work something out.  Then I reluctantly picked up the phone.

Teacher: Hi.  Is this Hazeline’s mom?

Me: Yes, that’s me.  Hi, Ms. “X”.  How are you?  Is everything okay?

Teacher:  Well, you forgot to fill out the form for Hazeline’s breathing treatment this morning and we need it to give her the treatment.  She hasn’t been coughing but you said you wanted her to get a treatment this morning, so…

[Insert huge sigh of relief here]

I don’t know what she said after that, I was just so relieved that I didn’t have to drop everything to go and pick her up.

I sound like a bad mom, right?  One that doesn’t want to pick up their sick kids?  Horrible.  Actually, it’s quite the contrary.  I want to be the one there when they are sick.  Not only do I like to take care of them in their time of need, but I’m a bit of a control freak and like to be the one to have communication with the doctor and make sure that they are taking their medication on time and as directed.  I’m also the only one that knows the long list of asthma medications we have tried for Greenleigh, and the medications to which she is resistant.  But I have a job outside of the home and an employer who needs me to be places when things are scheduled, even if my kids are sick.

Now, it’s not as if my employer isn’t understanding when my kids are sick.  Quite the contrary.  My co-workers go above and beyond to ask about the girls and how they are doing, especially when they are sick.  I’m the one that worries.  Yes, I have vacation time and personal time, but just because my child is sick my obligations at work don’t stop.  I personally promised the client that I was going to be at the medical exam with her that afternoon, and I know they were relieved to hear it.  I would have felt terrible if I hadn’t been able to follow through on my promise.  Plus, if my work doesn’t get done, it won’t just affect me, it will affect others in the office.  Sure, one of the partners could have covered the court appearance the next day, but again, that was my responsibility and would have taken him away from his obligations.

For me, part of being a mom is about relationships.  Building a relationship with your kids, being there for them, and watching them grow.  Continuing to nurturing a relationship with your spouse, so it doesn’t get lost in the day-to-day shuffle.  But if you work outside of the home, especially for someone else as an employee, you have an additional relationships to take care of.  You have relationships with your employer and co-workers.  Even further, as an attorney I have a relationship to my clients that needs to be considered.  Yes, it’s true, family comes first, but you can’t just ignore these other relationships.  Even under perfect conditions, it’s a daily struggle to be everything to everyone, and fulfill everyone’s expectations.  Many days there’s no room for hiccups, like sick kids.

On this particular day we got lucky – no one needed to be picked up and nothing needed to be rearranged – but it won’t always happen that way.  And one day, when our kids really do need to be picked up in the middle of the day with little or no notice, Erajh and I will work together to make sure that one of us is there.  We have to, there is no other option.  I know that the world won’t end if I can’t be somewhere that work needs me to be, but it sure is easier when “The Call” ends up being a false alarm.

Of course, it’s only a matter of time before she figures out how the gate works and I have to find another method to keep her confined.

What you will need:

wood picture frame (normally $1 at Michael’s)

Piece of scrapbook paper

Mod Podge

Foam paint brush

Paint

X-acto knife

Sand paper or nail file

Cutting pad/board

Step 1 – With the foam brush, paint the back side of the picture frame, along with the outer edges and the edge inside picture window.  You do not need to paint the front of your frame, because that will not be visible (you are about to cover it with paper).   You want to pick a paint color that compliments your scrapbook paper.  Allow paint time to dry.  I originally tried to do this on newspaper, but the paper stuck to my frame and I had to start over.  I then decided to grab some cans from the pantry and keep the frame elevated while it was painted and drying.

Step 2 –  Cut the scrapbook paper down to the size of the frame.  You don’t want to cut it to the exact size of the frame, leave a little extra paper on each of the sides.  Don’t cut out the middle (picture window).  This isn’t a necessary step, but cutting it down made it much more manageable than using the entire 12×12 sheet.

Step 3 – Paint the front of your frame with a thin layer of Mod Podge, using the foam brush.

Step 4 – Place your piece of scrapbook paper on table, design side down.  Place the frame, Mod Podge side down, on top of the piece of scrapbook paper, so you are gluing the two together.  Press down firmly.

Step 5 –  Turn the frame and paper over so you are looking at the front of the frame.  Rub the edge of a credit/debit type card (AAA card, hotel key card, library card, whatever you’ve got) along the front of the frame, so as to press out any bubbles that may be trapped underneath.

Step 6 – Allow Mod Podge time to dry.  About an hour, maybe less.  Place frame on the cutting pad/board and use the xacto knife to trim down the excess scrapbook paper, but don’t worry if you can’t get it perfect.  Rub the sand paper or nail file along the edge of the frame to trim down the excess paper.

Step 7 – Using the foam brush, cover the front and sides of the frame with Mod Podge.  It may look white at first, but don’t worry, it will dry clear.  Allow time to dry.Viola!  Beautiful frames!
I absolutely love how these came out and I can’t believe that I made them.  I have seen frames exactly like this in gift stores for $9+, but I made them for about $2.  I wish I had done this project a little sooner, they would have made great gifts for the grandparents or teachers at the girls’ daycare.  I see grandparent gifts in the near future!

Have you ever worked with Mod Podge before?  I hadn’t.  After this experience, I’m just going to come right out and say it – ModgePodge is my new BFF.  The possibilities are endless.

When I saw Jennifer’s post about cooking 3x/week for her family in 2012, I admired her intention and felt compelled to offer support.  Knowing how intelligent, active, and engaged her followers are, I thought a few ideas from The Kitchen Counselor might help.

As you may have noticed in the title, bringing fun into the mix helps a lot.  Studies (and Moms like us) show/know that when children participate in any aspect of food preparation, they become invested and will likely eat (or at least try) the finished product.  Keep in mind children tend to graze rather than eat big meals, so make those snacks count and don’t stress so much at mealtimes.  Think of your child’s food intake in weekly blocks rather than meal by meal.  Remember we eat with our senses; color, shape, aroma, and texture COUNT.  By the way, all items mentioned below work for grown-ups, too.  Our children absorb what we model.

•  Shapes – Besides taste, animal crackers, goldfish, and other shaped foods capture your toddler’s attention and imagination.  Use cookie cutters or pre-shaped items as garnish.
•  Little Bits – Imagine you’re 3 and a plate arrives with this big lump of brown (known to parents as meat loaf), which Mom then cuts into tiny pieces.  Yuk.  How about the same meatloaf arriving in the shape of a muffin?  Much more appealing.  Depending on your protein choice you’ll find a multitude of options online under muffin tin meatloaf.  How about muffin tin omelettes?
• Dips and Dunks – We know our little ones love to eat with their hands.  Try hummus, salsa (mild of course), yogurt, nut butter, dressing with crackers, veggies, fruit, pita, cheese sticks, pieces of protein, fingers!
• Roll-ups – This technique combines your little one’s intake of protein and veggies.  When using deli meats, you can roll a thin carrot stick, celery stick, cucumber stick, jicama stick, bell pepper stick, or a cherry/grape tomato depending on what your child likes.
• Blend it – Oh what you can hide in a smoothie!  Yogurt, fruit (particularly bananas) can mask the following additions quite well: protein powder (if your toddler has a deficit), greens, supplements, nut butter, fruit, veggies.  Add a story about the color of the smoothie, serve in a cool cup and you’ve got a winner!  Let them “dump” the items in the blender and push the buttons.

If this post helps, let us know and I’ll continue the series!

See You Around the Cutting Board.

You will need:

1 box regular brownie mix (and all the requirements on the box – eggs, oil, water)

1 cup chocolate chips

Peppermint extract

1 cup vanilla frosting

2 drops green food coloring

4 teaspoons margarine

4 teaspoons corn syrup

2 teaspoons hot water

Step 1 – Preheat oven to 350 degrees.  Grease the bottom of a 13×9 pan.

Step 2 – Prepare brownie mix as directed on the box.  After the batter is well blended, stir in 4 drops peppermint extract and 2/3 cup of the chocolate chips.  Set remaining chips aside.

Step 3 – Bake for 24 minutes.  Allow to cool for 1 hour.

My brownies cracked when removing them from the pan. While I made them in a 13x9 pan, only about 9x9 survived. Make sure to liberally grease the pan before baking these.

Step 4 – In a small bowl mix 1 cup vanilla frosting with 1/4 teaspoon of peppermint extract and 2 drops green food coloring.  Mine came out a bit light, I think I would add another drop or two if I could go back and do it again.

Step 5 –  Frost brownies, cut into slices, and set aside.

It looks white, but it is really a very light green.

Step 6 – In a small sauce pan, melt remaining 1/3 cup chocolate chips, margarine, and corn syrup.  Once melted add 2 tablespoons of water, slowly (add just a few drops at a time), so the sauce becomes thin.  I added extra water, but mine never got thin enough to drizzle, so I used a pastry bag to drizzle the topping on the brownies.  Refrigerate for at least 30 minutes (I left mine in the fridge overnight).

If you want more mint, you can add 2 drops of extract to the chocolate drizzle, but I didn’t want the peppermint taste to be overwhelming.  For me, it was the right choice, but I suppose it’s about how much mint you want.

This was probably one of the most creative recipes I have tried to date.  I took parts from 3 or 4 other recipes to make it work and substituted where I could.  They turned out great too.  Very yummy!  I still can’t quite get the grasp of how to use a pastry bag, but I’m definitely doing better.

Enjoy!