“I born a nana!”

“I born a nana”

I guess those books we have been reading every day to try to get used to the concept that a baby will soon arrive are really getting through :).  I wasn’t quite sure he understood that the baby would come out of my tummy through a ‘hole’ somewhere, but he told me yesterday the baby would come out soon through a ‘hole’, and today’s demonstration proves he really does get it…

This beauty was uttered not 5 minutes ago, spontaneously on the verandah to Aunty G.   Imaginative play! I love it!

Love mum

P.S. Let’s hope the real baby gets better care than this poor nana a few minutes after birth:

12 individual trays of spinach cannelloni baked and ready for the freezer..

Yum.

Me in the kitchen with a lot of food

Well, it’s that time again, where I feel as ginormous as a house.  And look like it too.

No, I take it back, as your father says:

“Who swallowed the soccer ball?”.

I’m not really as big as a house, just as big as it would be to have a whole soccer ball in your stomach.  Yep, that’s me:

soccer ball in the belly

Righto.  So today I have:

• purchased oil of clove and cleaning stuff from natural shop around the corner
• cleaned Poogie’s room including scrubbing the mould off the walls (from where I could reach, I restrained myself from getting up a ladder, though I was sorely tempted).  Living in the sub-tropics is a pain in the butt.  (Scrubbing the walls… What the??? – there is something about pregnancy hormones).
• Re-arranged Poogie’s room.  Twice.  Still not happy.  Need husband’s assistance as I think I’ve been scratching the floors in my haste to re-arrange heavy furniture single-handedly (because of course, that is what every 9-month pregnant lady should be doing, moving heavy furniture about the place for no good reason).
• Tried to take shots of pregnant belly.  Relatively unsuccessfully (see above for best example)… Photos just don’t do the thing justice.  The sheer size and scale is astounding me every time I look in the mirror.
• Eaten lots of snakes (lollies, candies, whatever you will call them).  Re-assessed belly size to see if any noticeable difference.  None noted.  Have decided at this stage anything I consume is just inconsequential relatively.
• Thought about eating proper food.  Put that off.
• Thought about reading the ‘list’ of things I have written myself to get done before baby arrives.  Written about 5 times now in different places (the kitchen wall, zenbe lists on my ibaby, scraps of paper in the handbag…).
• Decided that reading the list was kinda pointless as I don’t feel like doing any of the things that might be on there.  Like packing a bag to take to the hospital (I think I’m in denial about that part of the whole process at this stage.  Ready mentally, I say, but obviously I think I can put it off a little longer by not packing a bag.  Because the baby will wait for the bag.  Right?? Right.  Of course …).

Thinking maybe I need to eat some proper food.  May get in car and go and seek some out as cooking something sounds unappealing at this stage…

Love mum

ps. 38 weeks pregnant today.  Last time I was this big at 37 weeks…

week 37 huge pregnant belly!

All I had planned was the fitting of the baby car seat at the ambulance centre (great rental service here in Brisbane) and then a trip to the obstetrician’s for a check-up.  We had started to talk to little O about the need for a new baby seat in the car already: especially as his seat had to move over to accommodate the new baby capsule, and that the baby when it came out would travel in the car, next to him.  Where he could see it (which he seems excited about!).

Which had to be explained in detail again and discussed on the way in the car this morning:

Poogie: “Mum, where is the doctor?”

“In his office, in the city.”

“Doctor’s name?”

“Doug”

“Doctor Doug see the baby?”

“No, he will just have a listen to the baby’s heartbeat.”

“Mum, ambulance put baby seat in car?”

“Yes, there will be someone at the ambulance office who will help us put a new seat for the baby in the car.  So, you know, when the baby comes out of mummy’s tummy to meet us, it will have somewhere to sit in the car and be safe.”

“Mmm, yes.  Baby come out and go in baby seat.  When baby coming?”

“I don’t know, do you want the baby to come out soon?”

“Yes, soon. Doctor listen baby.  Baby come soon.  Today?”

And so on ad infinitum as we drove in to the city.

After we had the new capsule installed, and as Poogie was climbing back into his seat, :

“Baby sit beside me!”

“Baby isn’t here yet, it’s still in mummy’s tummy, here.”

Mournfully: “Baby come out today??”

Later, at the doctor’s office:

“What’s that noise??”

“That’s the baby’s heartbeat, and the noise in mummy’s tummy.”

After a very thoughtful look at the doppler and then at the doctor quizzically,

“Doctor Doug, baby come out today??”…

 

mmmmm…

I don’t think he has any real idea what is going to hit him, but at least he’s excited!

love mum

We had a wonderful getaway at the beach for the weekend – last getaway before the new baby arrives.  Time to chill, play, dig in the sand, walk, swim and just relax.

The water was a little cold but the weather was perfect.

love mum

beach escape

you may wonder why you never got a cute little ‘in utero’ moniker like your brother (‘speck’)… Feeling second-child syndrome already?

Well, yes, I have to admit, it is partially that.  My obstetrician puts it simply but aptly:

“Most women find that pregnancy just isn’t quite as exciting the second time, and there is usually another little one to drain your energy focus your time on”.

So yes, your Dad and I haven’t been as focused on your every move as we were with your brother (but believe me, we are still focused, particularly when you kick really hard – I think you definitely have a stronger kick than your brother did, I don’t remember it being quite so PAINFUL last time..).

But mainly it is because we just call you: BABY.  It’s simple, your brother could understand it a long time ago (and still does), and it still feels very personal.  So, “Baby” you are to all three of us.  Your brother talks about you a lot – he knows if I swear exclaim abruptly while otherwise sitting peacefully, that:

“Baby is kicking mumma.  Baby big kick mumma.”

And we all talk a lot about how “our baby” is going to come out of mummy’s tummy soon and be on the outside.

baby…who is in there??

Which leads me to the next point – your Dad and I need to come up with some name options pretty quickly.   When your brother was born we had a few boys names and no girls names we were really happy with, so it was a good thing he was a boy, but the point was: we’d had a chat and come up with a shortlist before he was born.   We really need to get on that for you.

So, for now, Baby it is, but we are thinking of options …. no matter what sex you are.

love mum

P.S. Thanks, and I’m feeling a lot better than I was yesterday.  No crying yet today.  And your dad is in a much better mood too.  So things are looking up.

well, I’ve finished work – woo hoo.

But all I could seem to do yesterday afternoon was cry.  For no reason really.

I went to pick your brother up from kindy, got out of the car, into the center and saw a friend and their daughter, and as he asked how I was, I said, “fine, fine” as a started to bawl.

Managed to recover marginally, and went outside to find you, at which point your teacher said, “Hey, how are you?”

And I started to cry uncontrollably again, saying “Why does everyone keep asking how I am? I’m fine.  I just can’t stop crying.”

We had a lovely dinner out, all three of us – your dad, me and your big brother, but I just hadn’t shaken off the funk when I woke this morning.

And today your dad is in an extraordinarily grumpy mood. I’ve fielded such comments as:

“You’ve been pregnant for 8 months now, I just can’t wait for it to end”, in response to my complaint that he was very grumpy and that I needed to be cut some slack and some empathy, being tired, a bit cold-fluey, and 8 months pregnant…

“You’re so selfish when you’re pregnant, I can hardly wait for this to be over and you to go back to normal”…

Not his normal empathetic lovely self.  Combined with my need to just have a day to do nothing (but still want things done around me), and feel a bit sorry for myself before moving on, it hasn’t been great.

That said, your Aunt G came to the rescue, ringing to have coffee with me this morning, where we tried to piece together what she actually did last night (fell asleep on the computer keyboard before midnight fully clothed but seemed to have a hazy recollection of events leading up to that, but perhaps didn’t eat much); and then she came back and hung out with us all reading a book in the lovely morning sun on the back verandah while you and your dad pottered around the garden.  That was nice.

….

Conclusion: I’m writing-off today as post-work-finish-baby-uncomfortable-funk-blues day.   Pity there is no chocolate left in the cupboard.  Normally I’d bake something sweet but I can’t be bothered….

Positives are that I definitely am not in full-nesting mode today.  I can’t be assed doing anything.  So you must be wanting to hang in there for a bit longer.  I’m not frenzied at all (I think I’m the most removed from that you could possibly be); and all your clothes, stuff, whatsisgarbage that babies need is still in the top of the storage cupboard.   ….

love mum

P.S. Officially 36.5 weeks…

quick note to let you know that you are occupying my mind more and more as the date of your arrival approaches.   It’s just that I’m a bit busy… so haven’t got to telling you about it.

So I intend each day from now on to write you at least a small note.

Today’s message: please hang in there for at least another 11 days.

I’ve had a few close friend’s babies arrive a few weeks early recently.  Please, just hang out a bit longer, enjoy the swim and the swishy noises of digestion and heartbeats, because I really need a bit of a break after I finish work this Friday (the reason I haven’t written for so long – lots of work and just tired tired tired at the end of it all)…  And then we want to go to the beach for the weekend with your little brother for a last getaway before you join us on the outside of my tummy.

I didn’t get a single day’s break when your brother O arrived two years ago, working up until the day before he came (not quite planned that way, but that’s how it goes I guess).

…

Those really strong tweaky feelings right down in my pelvis the other night sort of freaked me out a bit… I’m ready mentally for you to come, but not quite ready in real life: I haven’t even pulled down the baby clothes from the top of the cupboard yet….

So, hang tight, keep swimming around, and enjoy the ride.  please.

love mum.

Motherf@&$er! (giggle, giggle)

Great! Courtesy of Dad and the moron who just pulled up short in front of us in the highway.

ready for canoeing!

I stayed on the side on Sunday, the bulge (at 31 weeks) is getting kinda difficult to manoeuvre in a canoe:

the belly at 31 weeks (second time around)

But you had a big and tiring paddle:

Finished canoeing… Couldn’t quite stay awake!

All in all a good adventure!

“Brrrrrrrrrr… ouuggh”.

“Daddy fart!”

“Daddy farting!”

“Stinky Daddy.  Gross!”

A fascination with all things loud and smelly. And an (I think) admirable command of the English language to express disgust!

This is day-five I’ve experienced sans my little baby (toddler). The longest I’ve been before this was one night and two full days. This has been five full nights.

Mixed. Mixed feelings in general. I have had a great week: a mix of socializing and catching up with some of my dearest friends and some work in the middle of it all. And a bit of just sitting and resting. Not too much rushing about thankfully – just a few things each day. A lot of eating of good food with great conversation.

In fact, I think I have spoken and listened to adult conversation more in the past 5 days than I have in the whole year previous to this week. And I’ve enjoyed that (sorry to anyone who had their ear damaged by the unrelenting barrage).

The outcome? I’m proud that I’m still my own person and feel a bit more like they after 5 days away. It feels a bit silly to write that, and I don’t think I’ve expressed the sentiment I’m aiming to particularly well, but the gist of it is that my self-identity is intact somewhere beneath the mothering and I’ve had some time alone with myself in an independent environment this week to see that a bit more clearly.

But overall I’ve also really missed my little boopie. He talked to me a lot on the phone for the first few days, but today almost refused to speak with me. Both myself and his dad think this is because he is upset that I’m not there, feels a bit abandoned, and is expressing that by being grumpy and not wanting to talk to me on the phone. I hope he recovers quickly tomorrow morning when he wakes up and doesn’t feel like I did abandon him…

I miss his dad too. We’ve spent periods of our relationship where I commuted to a different continent, or travelled frequently, but right now we’ve been living together every day for a few years, and we are close. And I miss him.

Another positive however has been some time and mental space to think about the soon-to-be impending new arrival. I feel like I’ve had time to talk to my new growing baby, to play with it as it kicks and thumps it’s way around in my quickly-expanding belly, responding to it more in the way I did with O when he was in the womb, as I’ve not been distracted by a toddler in my side-vision constantly. So that has been great. A few minutes to start to envisage a positive birth and the changes that a new little body in our home will bring in around 10-11 weeks time.

And did I mention already that I’ve had great food and company???

Enough rambling. Finishing with two images that contrast this week’s experience: a picture of O having a bath in the kitchen sink a few weeks ago that I have been looking at while I’ve been away; and a picture if the passionfruit tart I consumed for breakfast on Saturday…

So.  Grumpy 28-week pregnant lady on the loose.

That is me.

Thankfully however a few months ago I booked myself my first trip-away from child #1 (Poogie) down to Sydney for this week.  So here I am in Sydney for a few days, sans-child and sans-husband.

A bit of work, and a bit of play before I’m not allowed to fly anymore.  So today, after a day at work yesterday, I plan to shake off the grumpiness by consuming all manner of sweet desserts at Adriano Zumbo’s after a short walk from the relaxing lounge where I am currently reclining at Chez Shef’s…. (thank-you for welcoming me into your home – read: letting me invade and take over once again).

love mum

ps. I have just reviewed my state at 28 weeks in my last pregancy.  And lo and behold, surprise, surprise: I was grumpy, the happy hormones had deserted me, and I was compensating with dessert…

p.p.s. and to cheer me up this morning already, two of our dearest friends just welcomed their beautiful little girl into the world. So I’m smiling at least a little

this week was a week of your dad’s birthday.  Tuesday, to be precise.  You and I practiced singing “Happy Birthday Daddy” for the week leading up to it.  You can kinda do it.  We do it line-by-line with you repeating after me.  Your dad was chuffed.   Cake however had to wait until the working week was over.  So this morning was cake-time.

So here it is:  a chocolate-hazelnut-meringue vanilla-caramel-icecream roulade.

Chocolate-hazelnut-meringue vanilla-caramel-icecream roulade

Well, an attempt at one.  I made the cake up, so didn’t quite get it right – I should have let the icecream set in the freezer for a few hours before attempting to add it to the roulade. And I think I then should have let it set after that.  It was a bit melted by the time we ate it!

Us & cake

But by all accounts it was a good flavour combination….

You liked it.

love mum

P.S. if anyone wants the recipe, let me know and I’ll write it down!

blowing out the candles

We braved the rainy weather this weekend and headed out to a friend’s bush block – about 2 hours drive from Brisbane, he has a little basic wooden hut on a co-op property in Northern NSW.   We figured that we had planned to get out of the city, and rain shouldn’t stop us as we had our wet weather gear.

So we suited up and ventured out into the wild:

Ready for exploring in the rain

…

Which you thoroughly enjoyed.  On Saturday we stomped about for a while, you did a bit of naked swimming in the fresh-flowing creek, we walked and looked at the co-op vege gardens, and generally watched the rain fall, listened to the whip birds and had a great relaxing time.

And after breakfast this morning we did a bit more stomping through the rain.  You were suited up in your Canadian-purchased Mountain Equipment Co-op full body rain suit and hand-me-down-galoshes (thanks M & B & Co)… So all good, we thought.

However, given that it was raining, the leech to human attack ratio was very high.

And you won the prize for best i.e. worst leech attachment position (or perhaps we both as parents should win bad parents of the day awards for letting you run wild in a rainforest-like setting whilst it was raining and there were lots of creepy crawlies about):

ready for it??

attached to your gum, INSIDE your MOUTH.

Oh yeah, you heard right.  Gross!

thankfully your dad was the one in closest reach so found it and wrenched the darned thing out, after first having the thought process:

“Oh, O has a bit of spinach in his mouth…… Wait a minute!  1. O doesn’t generally eat spinach (we did have it for breakfast but I doubt he ate any) and 2. it’s moving!!”

ERKK!!!!!

Love mum

P.S. and yeah, I would have taken a photo except I would have had to drag you back up to the hut through the grass, leech still attached etc, in order to retrieve the camera.  We figured it was a situation best dealt with immediately.

P.P.S. And for those of you who have never experienced the joyous experience that is having an Australian blood-sucking leech stuck to you and having to remove the darn thing by pulling it off, it’s something that is so gross that despite years of bushwalking and experiencing leeches I just can’t get over my feeling of digust over…  So welcome to that world, O!

I had a premonition today that things weren’t quite right.  So I phoned your daycare at 2:00pm, when I knew you’d be sleeping, just to see how things were going.

“Great, great, great, he’s having a great day…”

I had a good chat with your teacher and all seemed well, you’d been interacting well, trying really hard to talk in whole sentences all morning, and having a ball in general.

Then 30 minutes later at 3:00pm I got a call:

“O has woken up and he has a bit of a high fever, your intuition was right!”..

So I went and got you – and you were a little crying mess of hot sweaty 38.9 degree celcius feverish boy when I got there.  Poor thing.  So we went home, took the advice of the hospital from last time and after you having some panadol did no cold compresses or showers or anything, just some quiet time reading and cuddling together in bed.   Which worked fine for the first hour while the panadol was still taking effect.

And I learned something about you through the constant stream of babble-talk that you went on with while in your half-sick-crazed state.  You can count to ten perfectly.  Over and over.  In the middle of sentences, like:

“Mummy, daddy, magpie up in the tree, eating icecream, and then big bang, hockey hockey ball ball, hit ball up up.  One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, um, eight, nine, ten.  Hungry caterpillar, magpie waddle giggle gargle, mummy….”

small things.  Kind of astounding because your Dad and I certainly haven’t taught you that.  And we don’t watch TV or anything that really has that kind of counting in it.  Must be osmosis at daycare!

love mum

(p.s. 21 months)

I am hip

and

very cool

love you

mum

I like to research things before I buy them.  Usually over-research.  Take ages to make a decision.   Which is infuriating even to me sometimes.  We still use the stereo I bought when I was 18.   The CD player/stacker on it broke about 6 years ago.  And we didn’t get it fixed because we meant to buy a new one.  But never got around to it.  Because each time we tried to do research on what we thought we wanted, it all got too complicated too quickly.  And the stereo could take an input still – so we could play our mini-disc players.   Then we just reverted to radio for a long while.  Or listening through a computer.  Now I plug my iBaby in.  And it still works fine.  But we would like a new stereo one day.

That is all an aside though.  We use a beautiful, much-loved Mountain Buggy pram for you.  Which we deliberated over, and did a lot of research on (see above) before we bought it (in NZ on holiday, as it was cheaper there.  Yes, we carted it back through customs to save ourselves $200).   We don’t use it as often as we used to, as you like to walk, but you still love it.  Sometimes in fact you prefer to be in it than walking.   It is so easy to push, steer with one hand, in the dark, up a hill, full of a flat of beer (or two as your Dad once proved).   We do still give it a good workout: recently we’ve been trying to go for a walk a bit after your dinner and before your bed.  And do some bat and other night creature spotting.  You love it.  Anyway, I know you’ll be 2 when your brother or sister arrives, and I plan on baby-slinging the new arrival around as much as we can for a while, but nonetheless I’ve been wondering what to do with you and a stroller/pram.

To buy a new one or not to buy a new one?   We already have the Mountain Buggy, we have the bassinet attachment (which we bought secondhand for $50 and served as your sleeping bassinet for the first 3 months of your life when you were sleeping during the day: at night you co-slept with us in the big bed)…. And it would be good to use for the new baby coming.   And we also have a Quinny Zapp, which I bought because it was on like a fantastic sale at a baby store just when I happened to be about to take a plane ride somewhere and wanted a pram that could fit easily on a plane etc (and boy was it a godsend walking through airports over the past few months – you sleeping happily in it and us actually not having to carry a toddler for hours while transiting, braving flight delays and baggage carousels)..  Which is great, small, compact, light and good in the car boot.   So I’m not really keen on buying another pram – like a double, or a phil & ted’s toddler combo thingo.

So when I read about the new scooter-combo thingo from Mountain Buggy I was really excited.   It is a scooter that can clip onto the back of your Mountain Buggy pram.  So you can ride it by yourself, or be pushed along with the pram.  sounds like a winner, right?  Anyway, I decided yesterday that instead of deliberating for months about whether we really needed it, whether it is the best thing to buy, blah blah blah blah blah, that most importantly, IT LOOKS LIKE IT TOTALLY ROCKS and that YOU WILL HAVE A BALL on it.  Whether or not I can restrain you while walking.

the freerider – hopefully coming to our house soon

So I went ahead and ordered one.  Woot!  Can’t wait until it arrives.