A demon hunter becomes the hunted when an unstoppable assassin from Hell comes to Earth on a mission to kill…

The INFINITY ebook will drop in ONE WEEK on Feb. 15th! I know a lot of you out there who follow my fiction first found me through audiobooks and I wanted to do something special for all y’all… so I recorded a FULL audiobook version of both INFINITY books.

I’m even giving you a free preview of Part 1 (of 5) a full 53 minutes of what I think is the best novel I’ve ever written.

Click here to download PART 1 of INFINITY for FREE 

GET INFINITY Parts 2 & 3 – now available in the Wordsushi Store! Over 2 hours long!

Earth is Heaven for Demons…

According to the prophet Ranajee, demons live among us in human form. They exploit man’s vulnerability to place everyday people in a condition of suffering that exists right here on Earth.  As more demons enter our world, this condition will never end until all of humankind is enslaved.

Ranajee, however is the pen name of a mysterious and seemingly ageless leader of a cult of demon hunters known as the Church of Infinity. It is their chosen task to eradicate, with extreme prejudice, those who endeavor each day to hasten the end of mankind.

And when Ranajee gets his hands on a powerful artifact that could allow him to breach the borders of Hell, an unstoppable demon assassin is sent to wipe out all the members of the Church of Infinity once and for all.

Now one last surviving demon hunter must escape from prison and go on the run. With the help of a conspiracy-theorist punker named Rachel, he goes on a search to track down this artifact in order to trade it for his life and save the human world from certain doom.

Click here to order your copy of THE MVP or any of the other GFL books! Don’t delay, the sooner you order, the lower number you get!

Set in a lethal American professional football league seven centuries in the future, THE MVP puts huge humans on the field with five alien races to make a game that is faster, stronger and deadlier than anything we know today. The fourth book in the Galactic Football League series, THE MVP follows on THE ROOKIE, THE STARTER and THE ALL-PRO. 

Star quarterback Quentin Barnes has spent three seasons putting together a hard-hitting, hard-fighting team that combines all-stars, rejects, young players and seasoned veterans from all five sentient races. He has fought against racism and bound his team together through shared sacrifice, blood, tragedy and victory. But this season Quentin faces the biggest challenge yet — the deadly threat of the Prawatt race, which has captured him and the rest of his Ionath Krakens teammates. Quentin and his friends must overcome impossible odds to escape this deadly and unknown race. 

The GFL series is described as “STAR WARS” meets “THE BLINDSIDE” meets “THE GODFATHER.” Join the Krakens as they fight to take the title and achieve immortality.

It should be noted that my dad, Barry Nemcoff, couldn’t stand Nixon. Hated the man’s politics… but when you are asked to shake the hand of the leader of the free world, you do so with respect and honor. Funny thing was that I think my father was ashamed of this photo and I never even saw it until I came across it in a box of his old pictures after he died. I suppose most people would have framed it and put it up on a wall. He hid it away and never told anybody. Before spending decades in television news, my dad was in the foreign service and although I heard a number of stories about what he did while serving overseas, I still think there are some secrets he never told anybody.

I actually remember being in Washington D.C. with my father on August 8th, 1974. I recall we were staying in a hotel that had a view of either the White House or the Capitol Building, I can’t remember exactly though it seems unlikely that it was the White House… I remember we watched Nixon resign from office on the TV set. I couldn’t tell you why we were there other than my dad was there covering the story.

UPDATE: The Internet is a wonderful thing. A quick check of the Nixon archives leads me to believe this photo was taken in the White House on June 18th, 1971.

The first day it officially goes on sale for $1.99, I’m happy to see ADMIT YOU HATE YOURSELF on the Kindle bestseller list in the category of “Self Esteem!” (It had previously hit #2 on the list for “FREE” books this past Tuesday, but now it hits on the more important “paid books” list!)

GET YOUR COPY TODAY! 

I’m proud to say this means every single non-fiction book I’ve ever released has hit it’s category bestseller list at some point.

And hey, if you downloaded ADMIT YOU HATE YOURSELF for free and dig it, you can help this indie writer’s cause by leaving a review or by gifting a copy to someone you care about. Just $1.99 in the Kindle Store.

Are you your own worst enemy?

The obstacles in your life do not prevent you from living your life. The obstacles in your life ARE your life…

Do you find yourself constantly getting in the way of your own happiness? Then ADMIT YOU HATE YOURSELF is the reality check about your self-image that will arm you with the mental tools you need to get from where you are in life to where you want to be.

GET IT FREE – 3 DAYS ONLY! (January 17-19th)

Exclusively in Amazon’s Kindle store. To celebrate the release of a brand new Rev. MYN book, I’m giving away Kindle copies of ADMIT YOU HATE YOURSELF for FREE! from Jan 17th to Jan 19th.  Regularly $1.99 and AMAZON PRIME members can always read it for FREE! 

No Kindle? No problem… Read Kindle books on Your Web Browser, PC, Mac, iPhone, iPad, BlackBerry, or Android Phone with FREE Kindle apps! Read More

From iBookstore Canada… “Pissed Off” is beating “Sh*t My Dad Says”, “Go the F**k to Sleep” and “A******s Finish First”

Currently #161 overall on the Canadian iBookstore bestseller list for ALL iBooks.

Link to “PISSED OFF” in the Canadian iBookstore

Link to “PISSED OFF” in the US iBookstore

One of the interesting aspects of the KDP Select program was the ability to put my book up as a free download for a short period of time. From the KDP Select promo control panel window, I chose 12/31 to 1/2, knowing there’d be a good amount of traffic on Amazon over the New Year’s holiday weekend.

You don’t accrue sales royalties for free books downloaded, but I figured there would be some good branding opportunities to be had by getting in front of new readers. That seemed obvious.

What didn’t hit me until a couple of days later was that the REAL promotional value is not so much in the hope that free book downloaders will come back and buy more of my stuff BUT instead now THE DOOMSDAY CLUB is now newly associated with dozens of other similar genre books thanks to Amazon’s brilliant discover mechanism otherwise known as: Customers Who Bought This Item Also Bought

You probably can’t see it because the screenshot has compressed to fit this window, but now THE DOOMSDAY CLUB is part of the buying history of 13 pages of associated books. (That’s 8 books per “page”). I can’t tell you exactly how many “pages” of associated similar genre books were there before. I think it was less than four.

Over the course of the free promo, TDC was downloaded for free over 1,000 times and rose to #4 on the charts for free books in the sub-category of “Men’s Adventure” so I think the exposure it received during the free giveaway period was pretty decent. However, because I believe the real value in this promotional tool is that whenever someone happens to look up one of many other books listed in the “Customers Also Bought” list for TDC, my book will come up on that page as something similar-minded genre fiction consumers picked up.

Now, I have seen new paid downloads after TDC went back to $2.99 so I think it will help this book get more visibility in a very crowded market for thrillers… HOWEVER… and I’ll let you in on a little secret that you can now be partly privy to if you’ve managed to read this far…

Last year, on top of the 11 other books of mine I released, I also wrote and published two other books under secret pseudonyms. (One non-fiction, one fiction… and no, don’t ask because I personally find it much more amusing to keep it a secret for reasons that are interesting only to me.) The purpose of this particular experiment was to see if I could release books that would get zero social media mentions and have no website. Basically, I was just releasing these books on Amazon, etc… to see if they would sell. So, I did the same KDP Select promo with one of them during the same exact period and have now seen the paid downloads really take off for the same reasons I expect TDC is now getting more traffic.

So yes, I’m becoming a fan of KDP Select and I’m contemplating enrolling more of my books into the program to enhance their discovery potential by Amazon consumers. I especially think I may make all of my new titles exclusive to Amazon for their initial three months in release. We’ll see…

Stay tuned…

That’s right.. the Rev. MYN is back and “Admit You Hate Yourself”, the sequel to “Go Forth and Kick Some Ass” is almost ready. I’m giving it one final polish before it goes to the editor. With a little luck, it’ll be out soon… stay tuned!

Even back in 2005 when I founded Glenneyre Press, the writing was on the wall (so to speak). It was obvious things the winds of change were blowing in the publishing industry and I felt it was a perfect time to get in and start experimenting with ways to disrupt the norm. We put out some P.O.D. paperback books via Amazon and other online sales channels, got some mainstream attention thanks to Access Hollywood, caught the eye of some folks in NYC’s vaunted publishing community and became profitable by 2008. But it wasn’t until the ebook revolution came calling that things really got serious.

It was right after seeing our sales numbers from the 2010 holiday season that I realized exactly how quickly ebook publishing would become the most explosive platform available for me to exploit what it is that I do. By the end of February, I made a critical decision to make Glenneyre Press my full-time focus. By March, I had begun to put the pedal to the metal.

The Kindle, the Nook… these weren’t “devices.” No, they were platforms.

In April, “Where’s My F*cking Latte” had climbed to #1 on Amazon’s Kindle best seller list for books about Television. To date, it’s bee atop that list ever since. In July, “The Killing of Osama Bin Laden” became Amazon’s #1 book on terrorism and, in a very short time, sold incredibly well, becoming an Amazon non-fiction best seller in the process.

All in all, Glenneyre Press released twelve titles in 2011, five of which spent some time on  Kindle sub-category best seller lists. Other titles spent time on various best seller lists for Nook and iBooks titles. Not bad for a tiny company like us, I think.

But the main focus had always been to begin building up the catalog for the holiday buying rush I knew would happen. I knew the more back catalog we had out, the more Kindle, Nook and iBooks downloads we could sell. I watched the sales numbers start to track higher starting with the first night of Hannukah.

Then came Christmas day.

December was a record-breaking month for Glenneyre Press. We sold more ebooks (and physical books) than any other time in the company’s history. The week between Christmas and New Year’s was incredible. Amazon announced record ebook sales and  my push to be ready for the holidays really panned out.

We didn’t need to raise the profile of the company that much. All we had to do was be in the water when the epic wave hit. The sales rankings of our books stayed about the same, but the daily sales numbers exploded. That alone, told me all I needed to know.

And as many devices and ebooks were sold last year, it’s going to pale compared to what’s coming for December 2012, so you better believe we’re going to be gunning to have lots more titles ready by then. With the books we have planned, this year we go into our next phase… because I believe there’s still plenty of vertical growth yet to come.

Back on April 22nd, 2011, I noticed that my book Where’s My F*cking Latte had hit #1 on the Kindle best seller list for Television for the first time.

Ever since, WMFL has owned that chart, holding onto the top spot and I’m very proud to say that it will end 2011 still at #1.

For just a few days, you can get my thriller THE DOOMSDAY CLUB for FREE for your Kindle! That’s right, for free!

Ring in 2012 with a Doomsday of a different kind! And remember, the offer’s only good for a few days so get your free copy while you can!

Thanks to iTunes Canada for featuring me on the front page of the Humour section of the Canadian iBookstore, eh!

PISSED OFF is now in the Canadian iBooks top 10 Humour bestseller list!

Link to PISSED OFF in the Canadian iBookstore!

Wow. These really came out great. The photo doesn’t really do it justice.

And of course, if you want a limited edition signed copy… click here…

Yes, you read that right. INFINITY follows DIARY OF A MADMAN, but in the same way that DIARY OF A MADMAN follows ANGEL OF DEATH…

INFINITY takes place in a distant-but-not-too-distant future from the events of DOM… And it alludes to specific events that take place in between the end of DOM and the beginning of INFINITY.

And although it hasn’t been written yet, I’ve been planning out a direct sequel to DOM that picks up moments after DOM ends (and moments after ANGEL OF DEATH ends)… It will go into filling the timeline before INFINITY begins… but I have no concrete date for when DOM2 will come out.

And if you want an advance peek at INFINITY (let’s just say with some blazing action) I’ve placed a small preview of the beginning of INFINITY in the paperback version of DIARY OF A MADMAN.

The 2012 drop date for INFINITY has yet to be determined… I want to finish recording the audiobook version first… so stay tuned for details to come!

That’s right! Now you can order a physical copy of DIARY OF A MADMAN in trade paperback from Amazon! 

Plus, as I mentioned a couple of days ago, in the back of the book is an EXCLUSIVE PREVIEW of my upcoming thriller, INFINITY. 

That’s right, be one of the first to check out this extremely kinetic, action-packed story!

Oh, and if you want a signed copy of DIARY OF A MADMAN, click here.

Hey, one last free episode of PCH because I really appreciate the fanbase out there. Bask in the holiday glory of perennial PCH faves “The Interview with Jesus”, “My Most Favorite Christmas Ever”, “Santa’s Gay” and “I’m Gonna Punch You in the Mouth for Christmas” and of course, “Just Stockings On” by the awesome MUNK.

Mike and I will be returning for another season of PCH in 2012… Stay tuned for details coming soon!

Oh, and PISSED OFF: Is Better Than Being Pissed On..  makes a great holiday gift! Plus, it’s only 99 cents, you cheap bastards!

YOU ASKED FOR IT, you got it! The most requested MYN back catalog release to get the dead tree book treatment, DIARY OF A MADMAN, is now available for order in trade paperback!

Turns out I had a free afternoon after finishing the TRANSISTOR RODEO SOUNDTRACK ALBUM so I decided to take a couple of hours and put together a paperback version and get it uploaded to Amazon’s Createspace for some good ol’ fashioned book-binding…

It’ll be up in the regular Amazon store in a few days, but right now you can order a copy from the DIARY OF A MADMAN Amazon CreateSpace page for just $9.99. 

This was all pretty last minute stuff and I put the pedal to the metal in order to get it out so that you could order one for the Holidays, if you so desire.

And yes, I will be offering signed copies for sale, but not until after the 1st of the year because, believe it or not, I still haven’t gotten my copies of the book yet, LOL…

Oh, and just to sweeten the pot, I included a SPECIAL EXCLUSIVE PREVIEW of my upcoming action-thriller series INFINITY in the back of DIARY OF A MADMAN. 

So pick up your copy now… CLICK HERE TO ORDER and be the first to read the first few pages of INFINITY!

Watch the trailer for DIARY OF A MADMAN!

TRANSISTOR RODEO ORIGINAL SOUNDTRACK ALBUM – Featuring 16 tracks and OVER 2 HOURS OF MUSIC! All original underscore written and produced by yours truly… pop your earbuds in while you read and let this pulse-pounding electronic and percussion score bring the story alive.

Only $2.99. CLICK HERE

Some of you may remember the Transistor Rodeo audiobook podcast that I originally did a couple of years back and how I had decided to try something nobody had done before–write a complete musical underscore for the entire book, wall-to-wall… It was a lot of work but I think it really added something to this already incredible story. Now that TRANSISTOR RODEO is out for Kindle, Nook, iBooks and in Paperback, I thought it would be cool to go back and remaster a whole bunch of those original music score tracks and release them so you can experience the book in a whole new way…

Here, check out some of the tracks!

Amazon’s new lending library for the Kindle is now open and I just made my novel-length thriller, THE DOOMSDAY CLUB available as a free read for all Amazon Prime Members!

This means all of you new KINDLE FIRE owners who were blessed with that one-year of free Amazon Prime membership can indulge in this lightning-paced thriller of mine about four friends who inadvertently kill someone and then invent a phony terrorist group to cover up the crime.

 AMAZON PRIME MEMBERS CAN READ THE DOOMSDAY CLUB FOR FREE!

I HAVE AN IDEA HOW TO GET RID OF THE BODY…

Nikko says, swallowing hard. “But you may not like it.

As it turns out, you don’t. Not even one little bit. But deep down inside you have a gut feeling this is the only chance you’re going to get….

“Reads like a bullet train. I couldn’t put it down!”
–BERT LOVITT, screenwriter, director (PRINCE JACK)

“…Your motivation has helped me carve out a fresh start for myself in a new job with a 50% pay raise.” – TOM C.

“I was able to pull my grades up in time to open up all these doors and provide myself with a bright future…. I wouldn’t have been able to get where I am without the encouragement you preach…” – ADAM D.

“…helped me out by making me ask questions about what I wanted to do and how I could be a better attorney…” – TIM W.

Yeah, I know a lot of you only think of me as that goofball who does that PCH thing. LOL… but truly, I am grateful to know that the simple little lessons I’ve learned that help me stay motivated, creative and moving forward do indeed resonate with others. If you have any comments about my Rev. MYN sermons or Go Forth and Kick Some Ass, please feel free to drop me a line.

And yes, there’s another Rev. MYN book coming in 2012!

The Killing of Osama Bin Laden

Where’s My F*cking Latte

Go Forth and Kick Some Ass

PISSED OFF: Is Better Than Being Pissed On…

Go Forth and Pissed Off are both hanging on by a thread… though since they both seem to linger outside the top 100, I hope this won’t be their last time on their respective lists… finger’s X’d.

However, one of the things that went extremely right this year was my own efforts to build up my book sales. Around March, I discovered the ebook revolution had come knocking on my door. Sales of the one ebook I had released in 2008, “Where’s My F*cking Latte“, had been growing from a seedling into a mighty oak and were now exploding. I realized immediately that the growing ebook revolution would be huge for indie guys like me. My buddy Blake Morgan really instilled a mission into my head when he told me that the best way to sell back catalog was to release more material.

So that’s what I did. I polished up and released seven older novels as ebooks, several of which had only been available as serialized podcasts. I wrote lots and lots of brand new material and released three more non-fiction books and a book of short stories. All four of my non-fiction books hit the Kindle bestseller lists in their respective categories. Latte and the Bin Laden book have become fixtures at the top of theirs.

And yes, all of my books sell copies and those sales keep growing as the market continues to go vertical.

So far for 2012 I have a brand new urban fantasy series comprised of three novellas. I also have another Rev. MYN book, the sequel to “Go Forth and Kick Some Ass,” coming out. Both projects are written and finished. I’m also starting development on another big non-fiction book that I’d like to have out before summer.

And as I was drafting a battle plan of what I’d like to accomplish as an author in 2012, I had a thought. I’d love to find a great writing assignment. I am very fortunate to spend as much time as I do working on all of my own books, but in the spirit of spicing it up a bit I was thinking it would be really awesome  to get hired to write for someone else’s project…to step into some other character’s world and put my talents to work adding my own spin to their adventures.

The dream: to write a big action story as part of a massive franchise like Bond, Halo or something similar. My novel, “Number One with a Bullet” was very much a Bourne-meets-Bond type of story. I know I could knock something like this out of the park.

I don’t really know anybody to approach with this so I thought I’d just throw it out there, screaming into the sky with the hope that somehow, someway it finds the right ears. If you have an action franchise that needs an author, let’s talk. I’ll send you samples of some of my best pulse-pounding work and we’ll go from there.

Let me just say up front that there have been a small number of PCH fans out there who have been amazing. You know who you are. You’ve communicated with us, sent us links to stuff. You’ve made doing the show again a lot of fun and we deeply appreciate you because you are our favorite fans… the problem is that you are unfortunately among a very small minority of PCH listeners.

There will definitely be a new season of PCH starting sometime early next year. Mike and I have both agreed to make it happen. At this point, it’s looking highly likely that all brand new episodes for next season of PCH will be sold as 99 cent downloads.

We tried to keep it free… we put it in your hands, free listening audience… During the show’s six year run we’ve done nearly 600 free episodes and this past season has been the funniest ever. All we asked in our season finale was one tiny symbolic gesture to let us know that you were behind what we were doing and what the show was all about…

And yes, a pretty decent number of you did do this one token thing and I can’t thank you enough. Lord knows I trust Mevio’s reporting of our numbers less than I would trust Charlie Sheen to hold my stash, but considering the volume of downloads we’ve been getting, sadly those good people that came through with this one tiny token of appreciation for our work were few and far in between.

Christ, it’s not about money. It’s never about the money. If it were we could monetize the show with my MYN GoDaddy Coupon Codes, but I always hated affiliate marketing podcast monetization because it treats your show’s episodes like widgets that only exist to enhance your SEO and your SERPs. This time around we brought back PCH without sponsors on purpose, to go back to focusing on the show, not just making it a widget or ad platform. So, a pay wall is not about money.  No, it’s the principle of the matter.

We’re not looking for an audience that will just show up because we’re giving away free shit to fill their earbuds. I know if it’s not PCH, they’ll just download some other free podcast. That’s fine. I’m not interested in that audience anymore. Let someone else have that burden. Is it too much to ask to have an audience that mostly cares?

Doesn’t matter one bit to me if only a handful of people show up. Honestly, recording PCH is my therapy and I would rather do this show for a tiny group of people that values the work we do as opposed to feeling like I’m standing on a street corner with my guitar case open and my dick in my hand. To me, I’m happy to do the show for just one person who cares enough about the show that they would actually pay for it. One paying listener to me is worth a thousand free ones who can’t even be bothered to email a comment.

Given how pathetically little feedback we have always gotten from the audience, for a long time it’s felt like we’ve been doing a show for 6 people anyway–so in my mind, there’s little difference. But now I know if someone is spending 99 cents for the download, we’re going to work even harder to make the shows funnier and more entertaining than ever. It’s the ultimate experiment… to see if our show is good enough to grow that paid audience from a tiny handful of people to a less tiny handful of people.

Game on.

Because it’s much easier to catch little things in a manuscript that need to be changed when you hear yourself read it aloud, I decided that it really wouldn’t require much more effort to just turn on my VO rig and just “perform” my upcoming urban fantasy series INFINITY.

Now, that being said… I’m still not sure what I’m going to do with the audio version of INFINITY. I’m still contemplating several different scenarios. I think the likelihood of it being released as a free podcast is slim. Right now, I’m leaning toward releasing it as a paid downloadable audiobook, probably right around the same time that the ebook comes out… maybe even sooner. I’m also thinking that the ebook versions will include a few extra scenes not in the audiobook version… just to make it more interesting… but we’ll see.  Maybe, I’ll release a couple of chapters for free just as a teaser…

First, let me get through the material and see how I feel about it. So far, it’s sounding really good though…

We had an amazing time recording this past season’s episodes. I think they’re by far the funniest episodes of PCH ever. I know a number of you have requested we come back for another season. We’d like to, but we need something from you first…a reasonable response to a request.

PCH is free and will always be free to listen to. I think it’s some of the best free comedy content out there. We’d like to continue to provide this free comedy podcast to you, but we need to know you care.

Just as we laid out in the PCH season finale, all we ask is that you buy a copy of PISSED OFF: Is Better Than Being Pissed On… the PCH rants book. Sure, you may have heard some or all of the rants from this season including the ones about Child Beauty Pageants, Autoerotic Asphyxiation, Competitive Eating, Dog Sweaters and more…PISSED OFF contains all of the EXTENDED versions of those rants plus a couple of exclusive ones that are only in the book.

PISSED OFF is only 99 cents and is available for KINDLE or NOOK  or iBOOKS. Don’t have an ebook reader like a Kindle or Nook? No worries. You don’t actually need a Kindle or Nook to read my ebooks! Plus, you can always send a copy as a gift.

All we’re looking for is a reasonable response from the audience to know that providing all of this kickass free entertainment is worth the serious amount of time and resources that go into it. Enough people buy the book and we come back. If not, then, well… so long and thanks for all the fish.

We’ve done our part. Now it’s up to you, the audience.  if you want PCH back for another season, first you’re going to have to get PISSED OFF.

It’s EASY to gift an eBook. Best of all, you can do it without having to wait in line or find a parking space. Watch this video to see how you can give a gift Kindle/Nook/iBooks/Kobo readers will love without the hassle of fighting the crowds this holiday season!

And if you’re looking for some gift suggestions, may I suggest checking out some of my books for KINDLE, NOOK or iBOOKS?

INFINITY will arrive in 2012… stay tuned for more details coming soon!

As a successful and growing indie publisher and author, I see the rapidly-growing market for 99 cent Kindle and Nook ebooks exploding by leaps and bounds because there are lots of avid readers out there who love great content, but hate big publisher prices. That’s why I warmly welcome you to check out some of my 99 cent ebook offerings. And remember, you don’t actually need a Kindle or Nook to read my ebooks!

THE KILLING OF OSAMA BIN LADEN: How the Mission to Hunt Down a Terrorist Mastermind was Accomplished
An Amazon bestseller! Read how we got Bin Laden. Part detective story, part tech thriller and part Bruckheimer action. The true story is amazing.
Get it for KINDLE / NOOK / iBOOKS

PACIFIC COAST HELLWAY PRESENTS: PISSED OFF-Is Better Than Being Pissed On…
“Imagine Howard Stern dropping acid with Trey Parker and Jon Stewart…”
—PLAYBOY MAGAZINE’s praise for Pacific Coast Hellway and Mark Yoshimoto Nemcoff…
If you like rants, you’re in for a treat as I take on the topics that make my blood boil, including: Child Beauty Pageants, Competitive Eating, Autoerotic Asphyxiation and more!
Get it for KINDLE / NOOK / iBOOKS

GO FORTH AND KICK SOME ASS: Be the Hero of Your Own Life Story
“Life is tough and this book reminds you of that, but it also reminds you that YOU are tougher than anything life can throw at you. Mark has taken years of experience and boiled it down to an inspiring, humorous and dead on serious look at what you need to do to be successful in life. It isn’t as difficult as you might believe.”
- C.C. CHAPMAN – New Media trailblazer and bestselling author of “Content Rules”
Get it for KINDLE / NOOK /  iBOOKS 

KILLING MY BOSS
DELIGHTFULLY TWISTED. LIKE HITCHCOCK MEETS WES CRAVEN.
You hate your horrible boss. You’re not alone. And for good reason. Your boss is a complete jerk and everybody knows it. If you have ever imagined what it would be like to send your horrible boss to his or her early demise, KILLING MY BOSS is the “Youdunit” book you’ve been waiting for.
Get it for KINDLE / NOOK / iBOOKS 

SHADOW FALLS: BADLANDS
What lays behind destiny’s door? Is it damnation or salvation… one ex-soldier haunted by apocalyptic nightmares will journey to find out the truth… If you love horror, check out the first novel in the Shadow Falls series.
Get it for KINDLE / NOOK / iBOOKS 

THE ART OF SURFACING
“A deft financial thriller. Mark Yoshimoto Nemcoff writes like a man who’s been plundering and pillaging Wall Street for years!”
-STEPHEN POLLAN, bestselling author (Die Broke, Fire Your Boss)
“Great characters, clever writing. This books rocks!”
-PHILLIP RHEE, action movie producer, director, star (Best of the Best)
Get it for KINDLE / NOOK /  

Both Amazon and Barnes and Noble have created FREE APPS that turn your your Web Browser, PC, Mac, iPhone, iPad, BlackBerry, or Android Phone into Kindle and Nook ebook readers!

You can find free Kindle reader apps here: http://www.amazon.com/gp/feature.html/ref=sa_menu_karl3?ie=UTF8&docId=1000493771

Amazon even allows you to use your browser to read ebooks with their Kindle Cloud Reader: http://read.amazon.com

And you can find free Nook reader apps here: http://www.barnesandnoble.com/u/free-nook-apps/379002321/ 

So stop missing out on great ebooks and stop waiting for Santa to put a Kindle or Nook in your stocking. Trust me. I was skeptical at first about reading ebooks on my iPhone, but once I tried it I realized that it worked great and pretty soon the device fades away and you’re lost in the words.

And hey, while you’re at it, if you want to try these free Kindle and Nook apps out with some really great affordable ebooks, check out my books at Amazon and Barnes and Noble.

MYN Kindle Books

MYN Nook Books

Why the hell are so many people so upset over American Indian mascots when the Indians aren’t. Huh, South Dakota? Plus, we definitely do not give Penn State a passing grade and Mark goes double-barrel on Kirk Cameron for being a dick. This is the SEASON FINALE of PCH… maybe the last episode, ever…

DO YOU WANT PCH TO COME BACK FOR ANOTHER SEASON?
Tell us you want us to continue all this FREE entertainment. Buy a copy of Mark’s new book, Pacific Coast Hellway Presents: “PISSED OFF: Is Better Than Being Pissed On…” Just 99 cents! What the hell are you waiting for?

PISSED OFF contains extended versions of all the rants done this season on the show, plus 2 more exclusive rants you haven’t heard before…

KINDLE  NOOK

(Coming Soon for iBooks)

Seriously, if enough copies are sold, we’ll definitely come back for another season in early 2012… You want the show back, it’s up to you… Pick up a copy for yourself and one for a friend.

Don’t have a Kindle or a Nook? No worries. Get a FREE Kindle reading app for your Web Browser, PC, Mac, iPhone, iPad, BlackBerry, or Android Phone – CLICK HERE

Or get FREE Nook reading apps here

CLICK HERE TO SUBSCRIBE TO PCH  or SUBSCRIBE TO PCH IN iTUNES 

Listen to Mike Yusi’s kickass music podcast: UC Radio… 

Visit Mark Yoshimoto Nemcoff’s blog at Wordsushi.com

MUSIC ON TODAY’S SHOW: “Maybe, I’m Amazed” by BLAKE MORGAN

“PISSED OFF: Is Better Than Being Pissed On” gets its first sales ranking update on Amazon and debuts at #35 on the Kindle best-seller list for Humor/Essays, just inching ahead of “Girls Don’t Poop” LMAO…

That’s right everybody, my new book PISSED OFF: IS BETTER THAN BEING PISSED ON is out now for  KINDLE, NOOK (and coming soon for iBOOKS)

PACIFIC COAST HELLWAY PRESENTS:
“PISSED OFF: Is Better Than Being Pissed On,” a comedic tour-de-force by best-selling and award-winning author and humorist Mark Yoshimoto Nemcoff as he uses his acid wit to shred the topics that cause his blood to boil, including:

- CHILD BEAUTY PAGEANTS:
“You can always tell the pedophiles in the audience. Those are the guys whose faces light up like a fat kid watching a stuffed crust pizza commercial.”

- COMPETITIVE EATING:
“Three and three-quarter pounds of Rocky Mountain Oysters. Holy sh*t, dude. That’s the most balls in one guy’s mouth since the the last time the Village People played Elton John’s birthday party on Fire Island.”

- REALITY SHOWS ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE’S JUNK:
“You don’t NEED a mint condition Darth Vader figure in the package to survive unless you’re a pretty girl who gets cornered at Comic-Con and need something to toss as a distraction so you can escape without being eye-raped by every nerd in a Starfleet costume.”

- THINKING THE DINOSAURS ROAMED THE EARTH 10,000 YEARS AGO:
“It’s fairly obvious that if you don’t believe that the dinosaurs lived millions and millions of years ago, you’re stranded on the short bus in the middle of moron bridge over the raging rapids of dumbf*ck river.”

This piece was given to me by my dad who received it from a reporter buddy of his who was covering the fall of the wall back in 1989 and scooped up a suitcase full of bits and chunks after it had been torn down and destroyed by protesters.

I’ve seen pieces of the Berlin Wall elsewhere. The Ronald Reagan museum in Simi Valley has a big slab of it. One of the things you first notice with the Berlin Wall is the difference in the concrete that was used.

When you turn over the grafitti paint covered front of my piece you don’t see the porridge-like slurry you find in modern American concrete. Instead, this Cold War era East German concrete is loaded full of rocks and pebbles as well as lots of bits of quartz and silica. Originally, I wanted to write this post on Nov. 9th, the 22nd anniversary of the fall of the Berlin Wall, but I’ve been busy. Lately, I’ve been watching and following the “Occupy” movement stuff online and when I see this piece on the shelf in my office every day, it makes me think that there’s power in our words and actions that go far beyond the bounds that have been set for us by those who like to keep us where we are.

A new short non-fiction book from yours truly… coming very soon. I like this cover. A couple of small tweaks and I think this will be it.

Its the little things in life. Like a package from @MYN! One of my all time fav storytellers. twitpic.com/7ervy5

The last PCH episode of the season will be delayed by a week so that we can bring you this special presentation of the PCH sitcom. Tune in next week for the season finale of PCH… possibly the last episode of PCH ever.

CLICK HERE TO SUBSCRIBE TO PCH  or SUBSCRIBE TO PCH IN iTUNES 

Visit Mark Yoshimoto Nemcoff’s blog at Wordsushi.com

Listen to Mike Yusi’s kickass music podcast: UC Radio… 

TRANSISTOR RODEO is out in Paperback! For a limited time, order a signed copy of TRANSISTOR RODEO and get a signed copy of NUMBER ONE WITH A BULLET for FREE!

So, I’ve been posting videos over at my new video site: WORDSUSHI.TV 

The plan is to just turn on the camera and record some stuff. Here’s the first couple of entries.

• Thank You For Ordering Transistor Rodeo
• My Run in with the LAPD (Yes, cops in my driveway!)

Enjoy… and if you happen to track down this Mike Lee kid, I want to know how many wedgies he received because of this story. I think the over/under is 19.

And yes, we recorded this show like a month ago…

Oh, and one of PCH’s most offensive bits ever!

CLICK HERE TO SUBSCRIBE TO PCH  or SUBSCRIBE TO PCH IN iTUNES 

Visit Mark Yoshimoto Nemcoff’s blog at Wordsushi.com

Listen to Mike Yusi’s kickass music podcast: UC Radio… 

TRANSISTOR RODEO is out in Paperback! For a limited time, order a signed copy of TRANSISTOR RODEO and get a signed copy of NUMBER ONE WITH A BULLET for FREE!

MUSIC IN THIS SHOW: “Awfully Nice” by the Electrolites

(Interviewing Anji Bee in the .TV studio at Blogworld. Photo by Ryan Lum)

A handful of years ago, in the early days of podcasting, there were a couple of podcasting conventions held in Ontario, California, an industrial hub about 90 miles outside of L.A. that is about as fun to visit as the orthodontist. Those early podcast conventions were really awful. Blogworld L.A. was nothing like that. In fact, Blogworld L.A rocked.

In the old Ontario podcast expo days, it was fun to finally meet some of the friends you’ve made face-to-face and it was nice to share a drink or a meal with colleagues. But honestly, the whole new-media world back then was really made up of indie podcasters, most of whom were doing it as a hobby and the divide over the “haves” and “have nots” certainly brought out a level of obnoxious, petty behavior one would normally associate with children who were never hugged enough. Even the podcasting network Podshow, with whom I was signed, made the biggest douchebaggy move of all by insisting on having a massive stretch Hummer limo shuttling the select few invitees to their hospitality suite off-site a couple miles away. When I look back on those days, the whole thing seemed so unrefined and regrettable.

Fast forward to Blogworld LA 2011. I had avoided these Blog-New Media conventions like the plague for the last couple of years. This year I went as a part of the .TV team (I’m a .TV advocate) playing the part of on-camera host for many hours of live streaming interviews and coverage of the show. I can tell you that not only was it fun, but it was a fantastic time. I promise to write a future post for the blog over at Watch.TV detailing more of my Blogworld experiences, but the point I wanted to make here on Wordsushi was that, to my surprise, Blogworld attendees were predominantly made up of professionals. People who were writing blogs for the companies they work for, brand marketers, etc… No longer was it indie folks bitching about shit, it was pros talking about what was possible and sharing tips for how to make it happen.

Back in the wild west days of podcasting, lots of folks complained that it was the money that was ruining new media, now we see that it’s monetization and the fact that more people are able to make a living doing and consulting about new media that really made this industry finally grow up.

I did see a bunch of friends and folks I’ve known since those olden podcasting days and the common joke we all shared was about being survivors. Every single one of us has parlayed our early indie experiences into career and brand-growing opportunities. All of us have expanded what we were originally doing and continue to thrive in new media… and all those annoying whiners and posers from the days of yore… there wasn’t a single one in sight.

Here we are already at episode 8. Only two more after this one left in this season! Today, well… I’d like to say we’re not engaging in a discussion about public urination, fat chicks and what happened to Ghadaffi… I’d like to say so, but it wouldn’t be true. Oh, and today’s word for some reason is “sodomazado”…

CLICK HERE TO SUBSCRIBE TO PCH  or
SUBSCRIBE TO PCH IN iTUNES 

C’mon and LIKE the MYN Books Facebook page - When it hits 1,000 Likes, one lucky follower will win a brand new Kindle or Nook

Visit Mark Yoshimoto Nemcoff’s blog at Wordsushi.com

Listen to Mike Yusi’s kickass music podcast: UC Radio… 

TRANSISTOR RODEO is out in Paperback! For a limited time, order a signed copy of TRANSISTOR RODEO and get a signed copy of NUMBER ONE WITH A BULLET for FREE!

MUSIC on today’s show…

“Big Fat F**k” by WEEN

For every light that shines… a SHADOW FALLS…

Happy Halloween. I thought in honor of All Hallow’s Eve Weekend, I’d dig up the original 6 episodes of the Shadow Falls audiodrama. Meet for the first time, the mysterious Galen Altos, who knows not where he is or why he is there… and visit the town that holds a darkness far beyond his control.

Boo!

SHADOW FALLS – Episode One – Click here to listen

SHADOW FALLS – Episode Two – Click here to listen

SHADOW FALLS – Episode Three – Click here to listen

SHADOW FALLS – Episode Four – Click here to listen

SHADOW FALLS – Episode Five – Click here to listen

SHADOW FALLS – Episode Six – Click here to listen

And of course you can discover more about poor lost Galen Altos and the meanings behind his nightmares in Shadow Falls: Badlands and Shadow Falls: Angel of Death.

For me, publishing is a long tail business and Where’s My F*cking Latte taught me that firsthand. This is a book that first came out in paperback in 2007, then for the Kindle in 2008 and then by 2009, started inching up the Kindle bestseller list for TELEVISION. For the most part it has sat at #1 on that list for the last 3 months. Just lately, it’s crawled up to the top of the MOVIES bestseller list as well. I’m happy to say that, at least for the moment, it’s #1 on both lists. I’m even outselling Roger Ebert’s book!  Not bad for an indie.

In actuality, Where’s My F*cking Latte is on 3 different Amazon bestseller lists: Kindle bestsellers for Movies and Television and Amazon’s overall bestseller list for all books (ebooks and print) for Television (currently #6)

The Killing of Osama Bin Laden is also on 3 different Amazon bestseller lists: Kindle books for Terrorism, Middle East and also for all books on Afghanistan (Yes, there’s a list for that! LOL)

So that’s SEVEN, count ‘em 7, bestseller lists that these three books currently sit on. Books that I don’t really actively promote much, if at all. Am I stoked? Hell yes!

Bottom line. eBooks are seeds that, once planted, can grow into mighty oaks. It may take weeks, months or even years… but once that book is out there, it can continue to pick up an audience for a very long time.

A screenshot from Amazon’s bestseller list for Kindle books in the category of Entertainment/Movies.  As you can see, Where’s My F*cking Latte is currently outselling “Roger Ebert’s Movie Yearbook 2011″. Ebert’s hugely famous. I’m nobody. Both of our books are the same price. As a huge, lifelong Ebert fan, I’m a bit floored and humbled… Tomorrow, maybe he’ll outsell me… maybe. All I gotta say is that “It’s on, Ebert!”

Actually, there’s some more “bestseller” news I want to share, but it’ll have to wait until tomorrow.

Seriously, today’s music is sold with an expiration date, I swear. Mark and Mike take on this lofty topic about how music has morphed from an artform into a commodity that lasts as long as a carton of milk.

Plus, some moderately offensive bits and yes, a few emails, including a discussion on exotic animals as pets in Ohio.

CLICK HERE TO SUBSCRIBE TO PCH  or SUBSCRIBE TO PCH IN iTUNES 

TRANSISTOR RODEO is out in Paperback! For a limited time, order a signed copy of TRANSISTOR RODEO and get a signed copy of NUMBER ONE WITH A BULLET for FREE!

LIKE the MYN Books Facebook page - When it hits 1,000 Likes, one lucky follower will win a brand new Kindle or Nook

Visit Mark Yoshimoto Nemcoff’s blog at Wordsushi.com

Listen to Mike Yusi’s kickass music podcast: UC Radio… 

MUSIC ON TODAY’S EPISODE

“Pussy’s Still On My Mind” from PUSSY: THE MUSICAL

Welcome to America… well, maybe we’re no longer the once all-powerful world leader in everything as it was when I was a kid. Maybe our cars come from Germany or Asia, or if you’re talking about autos built here in the U.S. of A, most of the parts they’re assembled from are actually made overseas. Maybe, three quarters of everything we buy these days is made in China by convict laborers slaving away in deplorable factory sweatshops to make my cheap tube socks. But I contend there are still two things we invented in this country that no other nation can come close to touching.

Jazz. A purely American style of music that is more out of touch with America’s youth than the idea of pulling your pants up so I don’t have to see your fucking underwear. You know what I like to do? I like to sneak up behind them wearing a hocky mask and waving a machete to make them run. It’s fun to watch stupid teenagers fall on their faces. Maybe, it’s just me.

But I digress…

The second thing that I believe is so American that it is basically a thumbnail sketch of portraying what this country is all about—I’m of course talking about… competitive eating.

Do they have competitive eating in other countries? What about in China? Maybe they just open up the doors of their local animal shelters and call it a buffet. All you can eat. Dim sum fucking poodle, motherfucker! I’m just kidding… about the part that China has animal shelters.

You would think our love of competitive eating would be used by the terrorists to make other countries hate us? I heard that Al Qeada tried to rile up the locals with anti-American sentiment by broadcasting the Nathan’s Hot Dog eating contest to the far reaches of Ethiopia. You know what? It actually inspired the Ethiopian people to create eating contests of their own. It kind of has its own local slant. The winner is the one who eats first. I believe the current record is three days.

Look, not to make fun of starvation… unless of course you’re talking about undernourished supermodels, for whom a meal is a handful of cotton balls dipped in lemon juice, now that’s fucking funny. But the fact is, and without going all Seabuscuit atop my high horse, there are still countries in this world where people are starving to death. Of course, nobody likes to think of such sad things. That’s why mindless diversions and distractions were invented. Oh say, like, competitive eating. You don’t have to think about competitive eating. It’s eating. It’s about as primal an instinct as humans have next to fucking and defecating. Hell, I’ve known people who are so in tuned with their primal self, they like to do all three at the same time!

Let me tell you It’s not a pretty sight… and you can tell who those people are because they tend to go through a lot of bathmats.

Competitive eating “car wreck” entertainment. You can’t help but look away from a competitive eating contest any more than you can look away from two midgets fucking.

But what I love is the pure chutzpah that surrounds competitive eating. Did you know that it now calls itself a sport? I’m not kidding. It even has a governing body that calls itself Major League Eating. I’m sorry, you can’t call it a sport. Sport participants are otherwise known as athletes. Competitive eaters are athletes in the same way that rappers are musicians.

You ever see this guy Joey Chestnutt swallow sixty hot dogs with no gag reflex? Damn, I bet if you moved the competition from Coney Island to Fire Island you’d quadruple your event attendance. For fuck’s sake. That’s so many nitrates that if you die of a heart attack they won’t have to embalm you, you’ll already be preserved from the inside.

But if you think that’s messed up, just consider for a brief moment, some other eating records I culled from the pages of the Major League Eating website.

7 quarter pound sticks of butter in 5 minutes… that’s the record held by some guy named Don Lerman. Seven sticks of butter? First prize should be a Pulp Fiction heart syringe full of Draino right to your Aortic Ventricle. Turns out the same guy who owns the butter eating record also holds the record for eating 6 pounds of baked beans… Who was the sponsor of that? Haines?.. winner get a new pair of underwear. I actually heard the guy won a trip to Hawaii. Airfare wasn’t included. He just blew himself all the way over.

How about this one? 9 and a quarter pounds of asparagus. That was in April. I can still smell the guy’s pee from here.

But this one takes the cake… 3 and 3/4 pounds of Rocky Mountain Oysters… Holy shit, dude… that’s the most balls in one guy’s mouth since the the last time the Village People played Elton John’s birthday party.

Look, eating isn’t a sport. It’s a fucking art.

Personally, if we’re going to judge people on eating, how about one where you get points for style. Now, I’m not talking about lifting your pinky in the air or any of that hoity-toity “putting on airs for the queen” bullshit. You should get graded by how you look doing it, like surfing or freestyle skiing. But who am I kidding. The closest thing competitive eating will ever come to art is when some dude Jackson Pollacks the floor after nine buckets of chili cheese fries.

Hey man, there is serious money in competitive eating. What I especially love. You know who is Major League Eating’s biggest sponsor?

Peptol Bismol.

No, I am not pulling your schwantz. Pepto. That pink shit you drink when your stomach is all fucked up. Isn’t that just beautiful.

Peptol Bismol sponsoring Major League Eating is like Budweiser sponsoring the TV show about Interventions.

Oh, I kid, but people LOVE this type of entertainment. Every year, come the Fourth of July, I already know that at noon Eastern I’m going to be in front of a TV set watching that Nathan’s hot dog eating contest, wondering why the fuck I keep doing it while at the same time not being able to pry myself away. Watching the Victoria Secret fashion show makes me want to jack off… Watching Joey Chestnutt eat 60 Nathan’s Hot dogs still makes me want to jack off but I put mustard on it first.

Given this country’s obsession with food and food over consumption, I predict that in 50 years competitive eating will surpass baseball as America’s favorite pastime… The hall of fame will be a drive thru. Of course competitive eating will have its Babe Ruth, who may actually get his reputation from actually eating Baby Ruth bars… or perhaps instead competitive eating will have it’s own Billy Jean King who will have an endless appetite for bearded clam. Personally, I can’t wait for competitive eating’s Jackie Robinson… I bet guy who breaks the color barrier won’t be black or brown. He’ll be a nice shade of purple from the 18 chicken wings he’s fucking choking on.

*****

This rant was originally performed in the episode of PACIFIC COAST HELLWAY entitled “Americans Sure Love to Eat“

Raf, who has been a big supporter of my work for years posted this photo on Facebook right afte he received his brand new copy of  Transistor Rodeo in paperback. I had to snag it because it really, really made my day. How awesome is this?

Thanks Raf! You totally rock, buddy!

You know, I’m getting more serious about offering to hire myself out to design ebook covers for other people. Super pro Joel Friedlander from TheBookDesigner.com had this to say about the artwork I created for SHADOW FALLS: ANGEL OF DEATH:

“…he has quite a knack at graphic design…”

Hey, that’s enough for me!

I submitted it for his monthly ebook cover design awards for Sept 2011. Winners get announced tomorrow. Wish me luck!

Get yer pitchforks and torches, bitches! It’s riot season here in the U.S. of A. Finally, Americans getting off their fat, lazy asses and standing up against the total ass reaming the middle class has taken by a government that wants to see the middle class eliminated…. or something like that. Damn, it’s exciting to see American’s own version of Arab Spring… Hey, stick it to them, Occupiers. I believe in capitol punishment, meaning I believe everybody in the Capitol should be punished.

Okay, now that’s off my chest. It’s time to rock some PCH. Mike and I decide to take on this lofty topic with our usual cynical indifference and then we get a visit from Doofy, who may or may not be fixing a roof and then I go apeshit about something that drives me nuts: anonymous internet commenting.

It’s all right here… if you can handle it. It’s NSFW, as if you didn’t know that already.

CLICK HERE TO SUBSCRIBE TO PCH  or
SUBSCRIBE TO PCH IN iTUNES 

TRANSISTOR RODEO is out in Paperback! For a limited time, order a signed copy of TRANSISTOR RODEO and get a signed copy of NUMBER ONE WITH A BULLET for FREE!

LIKE the MYN Books Facebook page - When it hits 1,000 Likes, one lucky follower will win a brand new Kindle or Nook

Visit Mark Yoshimoto Nemcoff’s blog at Wordsushi.com

Listen to Mike Yusi’s kickass music podcast: UC Radio… 

And don’t forget to VOTE FOR UC RADIO every day over at PodcastAwards.com

MUSIC IN THIS EPISODE:

“Asshole” by JIM’S BIG EGO

“Ready or Not” by MIKE ERRICO