When Glen Hoddle, the coach of the English national football team, admitted that many of his players habitually consulted a spiritual healer all the newspapers reported the news. It was immediately thought that this was a new fashion. In reality, spiritual healing (sometimes called “natural” or “by suggestion”) is undoubtedly the oldest form of healing known to man. It has been practiced in various forms all over the world for thousands of years. Like many other ancient practices, it has been denied in the past century throughout the West. Only recently has it been rediscovered.

This healing energy is described as a mixture of “earth energies”, electromagnetic energy that is in and around us, and that is channeled into the healer from what can be defined as a Divine spirit, God or universal energy. The patient does not need to believe in a particular religion or spiritual healing to benefit from therapy. Those who are ready to die should try using the energy.

It is good to keep in mind that what is called spiritual healing is not in itself a cure. One of the fundamental beliefs of the operators of the sector, is that, for some people, the disease can be part of their karma (i.e. of their spiritual life plan). In some cases, therefore, even if healing can alleviate symptoms, it does not guarantee its cure. However, practitioners believe that hidden, emotional or other factors affect healing. There are indeed documented proofs of definitive “miraculous” healings.

Remote energy healing begins with a bio energetic test that investigates the functionality of the 7 chakra points, the Chinese meridians and the energy of the internal human organs. This is a real quantum checkup carried out remotely without the obligation, on your part, to have to move to undergo any sessions. Once the bioenergy analysis or screening has been completed, we will have identified all the points and all the areas in which energy blockages, excesses or deficiencies and energy transformation should occur. At this point we will provide you with an abundant number of targeted and personalized naturopathic advice, in order to balance the flow of excess, deficient or interrupted energy.

Illness is an external signal of an inner imbalance

Illness is an external signal of an inner imbalance. Spiritual healing acts holistically, involving the organism in its totality: physical, mind, emotional and spiritual sphere. All these parts interact with each other and often the real cause of a disease becomes evident only through its healing progress. The operators support the theory according to which in the body there are seven main “energy centers” (chakras), each of which responds to the vibrations of the healing energy with different speed.

The seven chakras are: base, sacral, solar plexus, heart, throat, forehead (third eye) and crown (it is not necessary to know exactly where these centers are to benefit from therapy). While the base and crown centers have only one exit (at the base of the spine at the apex of the head), the other centers have two, one behind, and through the whole body. Each center is correlated and infuses energy into a different part of the body and has different emotional, mental and spiritual functions. The base center, for example, is related to the adrenal glands, kidneys, bladder, spine, colon and legs.

When people are “with their feet firmly planted on the ground” or “balanced” it means that the base center is functioning properly. The chakra theory maintains that when the well-balanced base center the whole body works more effectively it supports stress better; this center gives vitality, stability and a healthy sense of self-preservation. If, on the contrary, the base center is unbalanced, feelings of fear, loss of self-esteem or shame emerge, even if the original cause cannot be understood. From a physical point of view, this is thought to lead to chronic spiritual tension among other things. All this is described by what’s called the remote bio-energy analysis.

Remote bio-energy analysis: How does it work?

The remote bio-energy analysis is based on the Integrated Palombo Method (IPM) method, thanks to which the holistic operator is able to come into visual and emotional contact with you. The physical presence of the person to be examined is important, but with IPM we are able to produce the same results even from a distance simply by looking at one of your photographs (possibly of the whole picture). The muscle micro-pulses picked up by the holistic operator properly read; give a clear picture of your energy status.

What is the Integrated Palombo Method (IPM)?

The IPM method is the method devised by Vincenzo R. Palombo during the successes achieved in ten years of bio-energy analysis. It is a method that integrates three important disciplines such as: Applied Kinesiology, Teleradiesthesia and the technique of the Blending learned directly by Dr. Nader Butto. This method allows the operator to know with extreme precision the blocks, the deficiencies and the energetic excesses of any biological entity that has a body, a mind and that is animated by energy.

The body

The body is the physical part, and therefore the most manifest, and it is through the common five senses (taste, smell, touch, hearing and sight) that it is possible to investigate the state of health and vigor. Conventional medicine takes care of this, that is, it evaluates a body based on the answers it gets after wisely stimulating it.

The mind

The mind is not detectable through the five senses, in fact the mind is not tasted, it does not smell, it is not touched, it is not heard or seen, but it can still be analyzed through the senses with appropriate stimulations and / or through an emotional involvement between psychotherapist and patient.

The energy

Finally we have the most subtle part of the human being, that part which many people conventionally call the spirit. Energy, or bio energy, invades both the body and the mind and flows as intensely as it is vigorous and healthy in body and mind; therefore the flow of energy is always proportional to the state of general health. To obtain higher awareness, several spiritual readings are needed, for example Clairvoyant reading. At first, you need to understand the definition of Clairvoyant.

Detecting energy for distance energy healing

The detection of a strongly vital energy such as chakra and meridians cannot be performed by a machine, because the receiver / therapist, besides being particularly sensitive, must be at least alive. A machine instead can only detect physically measurable data of biochemical, electromagnetic, physical, etc. Therefore it is not suitable for bio-energy analysis. This device is able to detect all the altered states of the cells that usually occur before the onset of a disease, however, as far as chakras and meridians are concerned, mechanical detection is not today a reliably viable practice.

Important scientific bases

In addition to the ten-year empirical experience gained with this activity, neuroscience and quantum physics have been able to confirm through experiments in the laboratory the existence of actual direct communications between apparently disconnected particles and placed very far from each other, thus proving that space does not represent any obstacle in the relationships between cells and living beings.

The experiment of twin photons: Experiment by electroencephalogram

Lastly, the experiment appeared in 1994 on “Phisics Essays” signed by Prof. Grinberg Zilberbaum and others, which demonstrated how two people monitored from an electroencephalographic point of view (EEG), isolated and placed in two different shielded rooms respond simultaneously to a light stimulus applied to a single subject. In these experiments the motivation and the conviction to want to communicate in a non-physical way and the cerebral disposition in a state of alpha waves, constitute one of the important variants for the phenomenon to be completed.

Finally…

A very important element to consider is that we do not recommend making a medical diagnosis, but we intend to give you the right advice to be able to take action before a medical examination is needed. Our goal is to promote prevention and the best way to do this is to work in the root.

“Some people will follow their minds without listening to their hearts, and others will follow their hearts without listening to their minds. This is why reason exists, for there to be balance between the heart and mind. We were not meant to follow the mind and ignore the heart. Instead, we were meant to follow the heart over the mind, but without completely abandoning logic. The middle way is the preferred way, and this path simply means to allow your heart to drive you, but do not forget to balance reason with your conscience.”
― Suzy Kassem, Rise Up and Salute the Sun: The Writings of Suzy Kassem

I have a huge problem with many of the teachings of the spiritual community. “Listen to your heart. The mind is the enemy.”, they say. “Work on opening your higher chakras. The lowers ones are less evolved. Suppress your desires. They are the enemy.”

I am here to tell you. It is unwise to suppress any part of you. You were given every part of you as a gift to help you live life. We give our power away by listening to someone’s else’s formula (does that sound like listening to your heart?), and we wind up suffering in the process. It actually amazes me that we are told so often to silence our minds, when our entire world is projected by the mind. Mind moves around the sense of self.

When you suppress your desires, they will always come out in an unhealthier way. Ever said no to that scoop of ice cream you were craving, and wind up eating an entire box of cookies later?  Those people with the blocked lower chakras? They are the ones living life ungrounded, wondering why they can’t manifest anything. (When your lower chakras are blocked, there’s nothing connecting you to earth, so how can you manifest anything on it?)

And, those people who only listen to their heart and ignore their minds? They are the ones living from every feeling and emotion they have, with nothing else guiding them. They often make unwise, emotionally charged decisions, instead of letting their mind sometimes tell them they aren’t being very rational. They are the ones calling you to bum money because they spent the money for their rent on some bauble they just had to have. They are the ones who quit their day job to do what they loved without a thought as to how they would bring in income from it. They are the ones that end up in relationship after relationship because they were in “love”, but didn’t stop to use their mind to see if the relationship was actually a wise decision.

It doesn’t matter how much two people love one another if they are developmentally incompatible, or if there is not a shared willingness to become conscious. This is why they call it a relationship instead of a loveship. Love alone is not enough. If you want it to last, you have to relate to each other in ways that keep the ship afloat.-Jeff Brown

We were given both a head and a heart for a reason. While it’s important to have an open heart, this doesn’t mean that we let it control our every decision. We also don’t want to only make our decisions based on logic. If we leave our heart out of the picture, we also won’t be very happy. We will wind up in a job we hate, dreading Mondays, or in a loveless relationship because it made sense to our head. Here are tips on how to follow your heart while also letting your mind guide you.

How To Listen To Your Heart Without Losing Your Mind

1. Listen To Both Your Intuition And Your Fears

Are heart is what gives us that initial desire for something. Our heart provides the excitement and inspiration to make something happen. But, many people don’t make it past there. They either let the mind control them with fear and stop, or they don’t use their mind to make a plan to work on their dreams. If you don’t look at your fears, they will stay stuck in your body, and you will eventually become stuck. Your mind is only trying to protect you. Look at your mind’s concerns and address them.

Fear can be overcome, but it also may cause you to make a wiser choice. You may decide to date someone casually for a while to see how the relationship progresses before getting involved in a more serious relationship. Or, you may do your dream job part-time while keeping your full-time job to pay the bills. Listen to your intuition, and pay attention to the other parts of your body. Do you have a knot in your stomach that won’t go away? Figure out what your body is trying to tell you and why.

2. Do Things To Calm The Body And Mind

We live in a frantic world where it’s always easy to be on the go, and that causes us to ignore both our hearts and minds. When we calm our bodies and our minds, the true voice of the heart can break through. I like to do this by taking a walk in nature, taking a long bath, getting a massage, or listening to calming music. In fact, I love to start my morning with exercises to relax. Five Good Minutes is a great book filled with relaxation exercises that only take five minutes.

3. Don’t Let Others Make Your Decisions For You

We often ask others (others who usually don’t even have their own shit together) for advice, and then we let that advice dictate our decisions. That is the absolute worse thing you can do. When you have to go to others for advice, that means you are very disconnected from your own heart and intuition. In fact, you aren’t even using your mind to help you decided what to do. Go inside and figure out a path for yourself. Listen to your heart, and let your mind guide you. You need to live your own life and not the life of another.

 4. Take Life Less Seriously

We are so hard on ourselves. You don’t have to be perfect. You are allowed to make mistakes. The great thing is, you can always start again. I know some of the “mistakes” I’ve made have been some of the greatest gifts. My mistakes have often led me to places I wouldn’t have wound up otherwise. Realize that sometimes in life, you may go down a path you would have rather not have walked down, but only that path will lead you to the place you need to be. Have more fun in life, and listen to its flow.

5. Get Outside Of Your Comfort Zone

Often, we ignore our hearts because we think they are irrational, but some of the fears of the mind can be just as irrational. Don’t let the fears of the mind keep you from fully living life because you aren’t fully comfortable. Remember, the heart provides us with an authentic connection to who we are inside, and we can use the mind to guide us to take the right steps to live fully. To me, using both the head and the heart is a bit like deciding where to go on your dream trip. You don’t let the mind talk you out of not going because of all the bad things that could happen. You let your heart decide where to go, and your mind gets involved with figuring out how much money to save for the trip, what to pack, and the planning aspects. You use your mind to do the research, and your heart gets to be the one to dream up the adventure.

Do you struggle with making decisions?

Do you listen to your heart or your mind, but want help doing both? 

If you are looking for mentoring, guidance, or a game plan to create the life you want, I can help. 

I help with: 

• Finding and living your passions
• Living life on your own terms
• Loving yourself
• Better relationships
• Navigating big transitions
• Career changes and decisions
• Financial issues
• Business issues
• Starting a new business (business and financial plans and strategies)
• Starting and running a successful blog
• Managing stress
• Being happy

Email me at yourownlifejourney@gmail.com for a phone mentoring session today. 

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Everyone’s so timid and afraid to insult anybody, but in the end, it’s like we’re all trying to please everyone. In the end, we please no one.-Olivia Munn

 

I know some of you read that headline and thought, “Well that’s selfish.” What do you mean stop trying to please everyone? Work on making yourself happy? That’s ridiculous! I also can bet that you are one of the people pleasers. You see, we’ve all been brainwashed to think we have to make everyone else happy first, and then we can think about our own happiness.

When someone feels they are only doing things to please someone else, it never works. Think about it. How did you feel the last time you did something you really didn’t want to do? Did you feel resentment? Did you feel pissed off? I’m telling you the other person could also feel that, and no one won in the end. I’m telling you, all the people who get pissed off at you for not meeting their demands, the one’s calling you selfish. They are the ones who will lead a penguin into the desert because they know what’s best for the penguin, like in the photo above. Meanwhile, the penguin is melting. What do you think Eskimo pops are made from anyway?

No one knows you like yourself. Your intuition is there to guide you. You don’t need a guru, a crystal, healing, a partner, a pumpkin spice latte, or an infomercial to give you the answers. You have them already. And the key to knowing when you are on the right path is when you work on making yourself happy. Think about the times you have been the happiest. You are happy when your soul is giving you the message that everything is in alignment and you are doing the thing you are meant to do. Listen to that.

How To Stop Trying To Please Everyone

Get Approval From Yourself

We started out trying to please everyone because we all crave approval. Approval makes us feel loved. When we don’t have self-approval, we tend to seek it from others. But, if we get approval from others at the expense of ourselves, we will approve of ourselves even less because we are going against who we are. So, we wind up feeling even more horrible inside. So, then we start caring even more about what others think of us because we have even less approval for ourselves.

Start talking nicer to yourself. Would you tell your friends the things you let your mind tell you about yourself?Would you tell your friend, “You would look so much better if you lost ten pounds. You talk way too much. You say stupid things.” No, you wouldn’t say these things to your friends. You would be such an asshole. Then, why do you talk this way to yourself?

Figure Out Who You Are And What You Want

If you’re trying to please everyone, then you’re not going to make anything that is honestly yours, I don’t think, in the long run.-Viggo Mortensen

 

Another reason we often try to please others is we’ve never really taken the time to figure out who we are deep inside. We really don’t know what we want, so it becomes easy to let others tell us what to do. We became a lawyer because our dad expected that of us. We got married and had kids because everyone else was doing it. Think about how when you were a kid. You just got lost in the things you were doing, and you didn’t care what anyone else thought. You knew when you grew up, you were going to be a Godzilla ballerina. Nothing could stop you. But, when we grow up, we let what others may think stop us from the things we really want to do. When you take the time to know yourself and what you really want, that passion will envelop you, and you won’t be so easily persuaded to let others dictate your life for you.

Don’t Take Things Personally

We also tend to take things personally. If someone says something rude to us or looks at us the wrong way, we automatically think it’s all about us. I’m here to tell you it’s not. Most of the time, people are stuck in their own heads. They are thinking about the bad day they are having or other issues in their life. They make take it out on you because you happened to be there. Now, it’s true some people may just genuinely not like you, but I’m sure you have people who you don’t really like either. Hey, it happens. Not everyone has to like you. Wouldn’t you rather be surrounded by those who you can talk to for hours, laugh with, who you don’t have to put on a performance for?

Then, why are you putting so much energy out there trying to win favor from those who will never really understand you anyway? I am sure you have people in your life who have a great opinion of you. Others have a bad opinion of you. How can you be both? They are just bringing their shit and their expectations into their interactions with you. I had a situation just this week where I ran into someone who said an acquaintance of mine had raved about me and told her how much she loved me. Yet, I ran into another person who said this same acquaintance had told her what a terrible person was! How can they both be true?

Here’s a thought for you: Maybe what you are isn’t what people think of you!  Just be who you are, work on making yourself happy, and then watch in amazement at what will happen. You will start attracting like-minded people into your life, and the feeling of being surrounded by a tribe gives more fulfillment than knowing you are pleasing everyone in your life ever will.

Know That Most People Don’t Have It In Them To Easily Approve Of Other People

Most people struggle to love themselves for who they are. They focus on their faults and never feel good enough. So, if they find things in you they don’t like, they can feel a little bit better about themselves. It’s sad, but we’ve all done it. I believe this is a pattern that we can all change. What if the next time you find yourself judging or criticizing someone, you switch to thinking of all the things you love about them? Let’s change the energy. Let’s stop gossiping about other people and all their faults. When was the last time you heard a group of people talking about all the positive qualities of someone? Crickets….

…You be the one. The next time a group of people are badmouthing someone else, why don’t you interrupt and start talking about all their positive qualities? Let’s build each other up and stop tearing one another down.

Realize You’re Going To Have Haters (Especially If You Follow My Advice)

It’s very likely once you start working on making yourself happy, that this is when everything is going to go tits up. Yep, it’s very easy to stay in the status quo and do what everyone else is doing. Look at all the people trying to please everyone! You say, “fuck that shit!”, and you are going to have haters. People are going to be envious. People want to be as happy as you are. But are they going to come kneel at your feet and ask you how you got to be that happy? Are they going to ask you for your sweet secrets to wisdom? No, they’d rather freeze their ass off, climb a mountain, and ask an emaciated man in the sky for that wisdom. (By the way, can you tell me with all the millions of people who study enlightenment why no one’s every got there yet?)

No, these people aren’t going to ask you your secret. They will tell you that you are horrible. That you don’t know anything. What gives you the right to go around all happy-like and smiling all the time anyway. They will criticize you, your mother, and your dog just to feel better about themselves. Why? You’ve just reminded them that they aren’t living in an authentic way. They are trapped in the world’s cage, and they don’t know how to get out.. It takes a very humble person that will come to you for advice. And, I’m telling you the best advice you can give them is to follow their own path because absolutely no one knows what is best for another.

Learn How To Say No And Realize That No Is A Complete Sentence

When you stop trying to please everyone, you are going to be saying the word no a lot more often. This is when things really go tits up. People won’t be used to this. They are used to you doing things even when you don’t want to. You will be tempted to give explanations. Realize that no is a complete sentence, and you don’t owe anyone an explanation. You will notice that you often have to say no to the people you felt the most approval from. Approval is addicting, and we will find ourselves doing endless favors for those who give it to us. But, you can’t eat approval for dinner. Approval doesn’t pay the bills.

Flatterers tend to be very good at making us feel good about ourselves and asking us for “favors” in the same sentence. “You are such a good cook. Will you give a dinner party for me and my nine friends?” Yes, some “friends” will fall away, but did you really need that kind of friend? No. (No explanation needed.) This will free up your time to help the people in your life that you really want to help instead of those who are constantly filling your time with their endless requests. Honor yourself and your desires, and everyone will be happier in the end.

Be Open

When you stop trying to please others, you share more of yourself with others. You won’t care what they think, and you never know when sharing something about yourself will help someone else and what they are going through. Yes, you are allowing yourself to be vulnerable, but this vulnerability greats more authentic connection with others instead of superficial interactions.

Do you want more help learning how not to be a people pleaser?

Do you want help learning about what can help you to be happy in life?

I can help!

Jump on Skype with me. I offer Skype coaching sessions to help you with creating and loving your life. 

Email me at yourownlifejourney@gmail.com.

Did you like this article? I don’t give a fuck if you did or didn’t, but I’d love for you to follow me on Twitter and Facebook.

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Giving And Receiving

I saw that while I had hoped to make everyone in my life feel loved, that what people want most of all is for their love to be received. Think about it. Think about the last time your love wasn’t received by someone. What did that feel like? I think that giving and receiving are equally important. After all, we want someone to receive our words in conversation. When we don’t receive other’s words and are stuck in our own thoughts, we miss the opportunity to really know the person in front of us. When we don’t receive the gifts they are offering us, the relationship becomes unbalanced.

I had attracted a lot of “takers” in my life. I realized these takers were nothing but a mirror. I didn’t know how to receive, so, of course, I was attracting “takers”. They felt my energy and were like, “Yay. Here is someone who is giving, and who doesn’t want anything in return. I am going to feed off that.” And, my need of not having to receive was getting filled.

I realized that I knew in my head how much my friends and the people in my life loved me. But, I had never allowed myself to actually feel this in my heart. As this shift occurred, I allowed my heart to feel all the love that people had for me, and I cried. I cried as my heart expanded to let all the love in. I realized there was nothing I had to do to earn people’s love. I was worthy, just as I was.

I then let my heart expand, and I felt the love that the entire world had for me just feel me up. I saw how everything needed to be an equal balance of giving and receiving. I saw how I watered the plants, and they, in turn, gave me food and beauty. I saw how the sunlight touched my skin every day, and I let myself really receive that light. I felt this in a way I had never felt it before. I just let everything in my world touch me to the core.

I let myself be completely vulnerable. I felt my heart touched in a way it had never been touched before, and realized that I had let a barrier form over my heart because I was afraid of that vulnerability. When I was receiving, I had to let down my guard, put down my defenses, and let whoever was giving inside. That means they were going to see everything. My weaknesses, what I considered the dark parts, everything. I had to let go of my thoughts of owing someone for the gifts they chose to give me.

I think the most vulnerable thing was admitting that I, too, longed to be nurtured. I needed to let other people’s care in, and not always be the one who nurtured and gave to others. I was once told that I was a strong horse who tended to carry others. The thing is you never see a horse carrying another horse. I needed to sometimes let myself be the rider and allow others to carry me.

I also realized that the act of receiving is a more feminine attribute, and how, in our society, anything feminine is portrayed as somehow “less than.” So, no wonder our entire society tends to downplay the act of receiving. So, I actually increase my feminine energy, when I allow myself to receive. It’s so easy to get caught up in doing, that we forget we can just be, and allow ourselves to receive the moment exactly as it is. I then get to experience gratitude, which I believe completes the cycle of giving and receiving. And, I am grateful for all that I am learning every day.

How did I have the breakthrough that showed me where my heart was blocked? I had this breakthrough during a Paloma Blanca Ayahuasca ceremony. Paloma Blanca is a type of ayahuasca that works on opening the heart. It shows us things about ourselves that, yes, we may not have received yet. When I came out of this ceremony, and told my friend that I realized I didn’t know how to receive, her response was, “Ha, I could have told you that. But you wouldn’t have listened.” It’s true, and I am grateful for this medicine which has transformed my life. If you are interested in doing an ayahuasca retreat, click here for more information.  

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I used to be you. I used to hate Mondays. The weekends never lasted long enough. I just worked to pay the bills. Then one day, I realized something. I didn’t want to live like that anymore. Life is short enough, and I was tired of every Monday-Friday feeling like every other Monday-Friday. I realized that I was selling most of the hours of my life away to my employer, and I didn’t want to do that anymore.

So, I stopped and thought hard about how I wanted to spend my life. I wanted to see the world. It’s a lot of people’s dream jobs to work from a beach, and I decided that’s what I would do to. I created a travel blog about beaches, and decided I wouldn’t hate Mondays anymore. I’ve since created three more websites that I run. I also give sound healing sessions, life coaching inspiration, and help others to not hate Mondays. So, what got me from here to there? If you hate Mondays, you probably think your situation is hopeless. You probably feel stuck and don’t know how to get from there to here. I’m here to tell you that within the next year, you could very easily be living a life you love. Here’s how I did it.

How To Stop Hating Mondays

1. Stop Letting Other People’s Poor Decisions Affect Your Own

Many people let the people they spend most of their time with influence their decisions. They don’t even stop to think about doing things differently. Everyone else goes to work for someone else. Everyone else hates Mondays. So, many people go out and get a job they aren’t thrilled with because they think they have to. Most people choose to own cars that aren’t paid for, choose to live in houses that put them in debt, and wear clothes that they put on their credit card and think this will bring them happiness. Meanwhile, the debt continues to accumulate and they are left feeling forced to work in a job they hate to pay for all this happiness. Would you rather travel around the world, create a business you are passionate about, and have time for the things you love or would you rather own a bunch of shit that will all burn or break down one day? This is a choice you are making whether you have stopped to think about it or not.

2. Don’t Let Fear Decide For You, Either

A lot of people have let the media convince them that they have to work for someone else, or they will wind up on the streets. They are afraid to make the jump to start living a life they love. One day, I just saw how much of an illusion our lives are, and I could live the illusion in fear or in joy. And, I just decided, I would do whatever it took to love my life. I finally realized, I was the creator of my life, and if I didn’t do something to change it, it would continue the same way. Don’t let fear stop you and take away the real happiness you could be creating.

3. Learn To Live With Less

It only took me three months to quit my job, once I decided I didn’t want to live that way anymore. Why? Because I had no debt. Most people have debt today because they are convinced that they need things they really don’t. For instance, I have probably bought coffee from coffee shops less than twenty times in my life. I have always bought a used car, one I could afford to pay cash for at the moment that I bought it. (Yes, all of my cars have been at least ten years old.) I have never had cable TV. I have usually bought my clothing at garage sales or thrift shops. The same thing goes for the furniture in my house. I rarely eat at restaurants.

Now you may think I have missed out. But, I have rented a bungalow on my own private beach in Tahiti. I swam with manta rays in Raja Ampat. I have been on the world’s best beaches, written a book, and have had experiences beyond my wildest dreams. I will gladly trade “stuff” for the experiences I have had. I realize there are many financial situations out there, but people make small financial decisions every day which affect their future. They don’t realize that the money they spend at Starbucks will cost them $22,995.00 over the course of 30 years. That alone could pay for a trip around the world.

If you want to start planning a different future, I recommend checking out the website, Early Retirement Extreme.  It offers money-making ideas and great tips for saving for early retirement. Remember, it is the American consumerism mentality that leads you to believe that spending more will make you happier? Is this really true? How happy are you now? You have to look at the full picture and figure out how much things are really costing you.

4. Start Working On Your Business On The Side

When I decided I wanted to start a travel blog, I didn’t just automatically quit my job. I had traveled frequently, so I had plenty of photos and stories to tell without going anywhere. I stayed up until two in the morning most nights working on my travel blog, after working my full-time job all day. But, I noticed something great. I didn’t dread it. I loved what I was doing. I work just as many hours as I used to. The difference is now I don’t dread it.

You really don’t have to hate Mondays anymore. First, you have to change your mindset. Then, be willing to put in the work to create a life you really love.

Do you want to stop hating Mondays? 

Do you want help getting started?

I can help!

Jump on Skype with me. I offer Skype coaching sessions to help you with creating and loving your life. 

Email me at yourownlifejourney@gmail.com.

If you liked this article, then please follow me on Twitter and Facebook.

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Even the most positive person gets in a funk now and then. There are all times we feel sad or depressed, unmotivated, or just tired of life. When you are in a funk, it seems like it will never end, but there are ways to pull yourself out of it. Here’s my advice.

How To Get Out Of A Funk

1. Don’t Believe Your Thoughts

Have you noticed when you are in a funk, your mind starts acting like a two-year old who is having a tantrum? This two-year old will convince you that nothing is ever going to be OK again. The inner two-year old will keep feeding you thoughts that feed into other thoughts about how nothing is OK with your life. Don’t listen to your thoughts when you are in a funk. Your thoughts are coming from a place in your mind that will just lead you deeper into the funk. Just like with a two-year old having a tantrum, you can’t rationalize with these thoughts. Instead, go deeper. Go into how you are feeling in your body.

2. Give Your Inner Child Some Comfort

It’s easier to get into a funk when we get tired and stressed. So give yourself comfort. Let your inner child out to play. Get more sleep. Watch funny movies or videos. Laugh more. Run through a field of flowers. Finger paint. Sing. Eat ice cream or chocolate. Do something that will bring you more fun in life.

3. Do Something Kind For Someone Else

It’s easy to become obsessed with our own world and how things aren’t going right. There are plenty of people in the world who have things worse than you do. Volunteer or spend time helping someone who needs you. When you help others, it takes your mind off of your own problems. It also gives you a purpose for being in this world. If you are wanting to know how to get out of a funk, this is one of the best ways to realize that you are needed in this world and have a purpose for being here.

4. Get Back In Your Body

It’s so easy to get caught in your thoughts and forget you have a body. I swear, I think many of us just live life from the neck up most of the time. We are a bunch of heads walking around. Put yourself back in your body, so you aren’t so caught up in your mind. Dance, do yoga, swim, or do anything else that gets your body moving. The endorphins you release while moving will also make you feel better.

5. Talk To Someone

We can process our problems better if we talk to someone else about what we are feeling. It’s great to hear someone else’s perspective. In today’s world, we get so used to feeling connected by scrolling through our Facebook feed, that we often forget this isn’t true connection. Make time for face to face interactions with people, time in which you aren’t checking your phone, time in which you open yourself to real conversation about the things that really matter.

6. Let Yourself Cry Or Feel Angry. Give Into The Tantrum.

Often, we are in a funk because emotions are stuck inside of us. Let yourself feel your feelings fully, so they can move on. You will be amazed at how much better you feel after a good cry or after having a good, angry tantrum. We are so quick to label our emotions as bad, that we don’t fully feel them. Let yourself feel, so the emotions can move through you.

Do you want to know more about how to get out of a funk? 

Do you want someone to talk to? 

I can help!

Jump on Skype with me. I offer Skype coaching sessions to help you with creating and loving your life. 

Email me at yourownlifejourney@gmail.com.

If you liked this article, How To Get Out Of A Funk, then please follow me on Twitter and Facebook.

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Where To Find My Work On Elephant Journal And Rebelle Society

I am honored to have my writing on two incredible online publications recently. The biggest one getting attention is my post about my ayahuasca journey on Elephant Journal. In less than a week, it’s already had 24,000 shares! This is incredibly exciting to me, as ayahuasca has changed my life so much, that I am now helping the woman who leads the ceremonies here in San Miguel to give retreats. I would love more people to experience this life changing medicine and to know more about who they really are.

I wrote another powerful article for Elephant Journal about Victim Mentality. In it, I talk about how we often let the things that happened to us in the past affect our present experiences in a negative way. The article tells you how to change this and how to develop a creator mentality instead of a victim mentality.

I also had my writing published on Rebelle Society, a website that publishes stories of creative rebellion. They published one of my most popular stories, You don’t need to set yourself on fire to keep others warm. In it, I talk about how often we abandon ourselves to keep others happy. It’s impossible to have a healthy relationship with someone else if we lose ourselves in the process.

Another article, I had published on Rebelle Society was From breakdown to breakthrough: your brokenness is perfect.  The article explains how true perfection can be encountered only after we realize that everything is already exactly the way that it should be. It’s about accepting all of who you are, even the broken parts.

I also inspire others to take action on following their dreams on Rebelle Society’s, Don’t wait any longer — 5 tips for committing to your dreams. 

I am excited that the words I have written are reaching more people. If you enjoy my articles, I would be appreciative if you share them with others through Facebook, Twitter, and Pinterest!

Have my words inspired you to live a more authentic life?

Do  you want more help getting started?

I can help!

Jump on Skype with me. I offer Skype coaching sessions to help you with creating and loving your life. 

Email me at yourownlifejourney@gmail.com.

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“I’ve always been just me, but I was the last to know that it was all right.”
― Byron Katie

I’ve read just about all of the best relationship advice books, but none of them really helped to permanently change the struggles I’ve had in relationships. Until now. I discovered the Byron Katie book, I Need Your Love – Is That True?: How to Stop Seeking Love, Approval, and Appreciation and Start Finding Them Instead.

The Best Relationship Advice From Byron Katie

Most books only focus on how you get love and approval. We are taught to ignore the core of who we are to attract another, and then often wind up not feeling love because we haven’t been our true selves all along. The difference with the Byron Katie book is she teaches you how to accept yourself for who you are, and, in turn, to accept others for who they are. She teaches you how to change your thoughts about love and relationships which are often the root of the problem.

We often think that people should act a certain way. But, when we impose “shoulds” on them, we are arguing with reality. When we argue with reality, we will lose 100% of the time. Byron Katie teaches you how to accept what is. She also teaches you to look at your thoughts about what “should” be from different angles. She teaches you how to ask if the thoughts you think are really true.

For instance, you may think that someone’s behavior towards you is uncaring. Your thought process says, “They don’t care about me.” But, is this really true?  Byron Katie teaches you to look at the thought from different angles. For instance, you can look at it from the perspective of, “I don’t care about them.” After all, if you are only concerned about having things your way, and you aren’t looking at the other person’s perspective, you aren’t caring very much about the other person. You can also look at the thought, “I don’t care about me”, and look at the ways you aren’t caring for yourself that are making you feel like you must get care from someone else. You also aren’t caring for yourself when you take what could have been an innocent action from someone else, and are turning it into an insult. What you perceive as an action that doesn’t show care about you may have nothing to do with you at all. Lastly, look at it from a viewpoint of the fact that they do care about you. Sometimes the most caring thing someone can do for you is actually the action that is most caring for themselves.

Our mind likes to defend our position, and this is what causes us to become stuck. It is only when we see that there can be a different way to look at things that we can feel peace again.

This Byron Katie book also teaches you how to have authentic relationships by living your truth. So many times, we are trying to make an impression on someone that we don’t act authentically with them. We then don’t feel like we are really being known by others. But, how can someone know us if we aren’t being authentic?

“We use our beauty, our cleverness, our charm to capture someone for a partnership, as if he were an animal. And then when he wants to get out of the cage, we’re furious. That doesn’t sound very caring to me. It’s not self-love. I want my husband to want what he wants. And I also notice that I don’t have a choice. That’s self-love. He does what he does, and I love that. That’s what I want, because when I’m at war with reality, it hurts.”-Byron Katie

The book takes many of our beliefs about what relationships should be about and challenges them one by one. For instance, “If you love me, you’ll do what I want.” It shows that from childhood we are taught that obedience is love. So, we wind up tiptoeing around each other because we are doing things we don’t want to do for the other person, and it’s no wonder the love disappears.

Byron Katie’s book challenged so many false beliefs I realized I was carrying about love and relationships, and it showed me how to show up from a more authentic place in all of my relationships. It teaches you how to have honest communication with someone else and how not to lose yourself in relationship.

If you are looking for the best relationship advice out there, read this book now,  I Need Your Love – Is That True?: How to Stop Seeking Love, Approval, and Appreciation and Start Finding Them Instead. Your relationship with others will improve but, more importantly, the one with yourself will change, as you learn to express your true self and challenge why you believe what you believe. 

It’s not your job to understand me-it’s mine.-Byron Katie

 

“We can’t hate ourselves into a version of ourselves we can love.” ~Lori Deschene

“You’re doing it wrong!”. Four of the most deflating words in the English language. Has anyone who has said these words to you ever made you want to do things “right?”

And yet a quick look at the internet will tell us we are doing everything wrong from the way we wear our sunscreen to even the way we poop.

I used to be a self-improvement addict. I would work on one issue that I thought was wrong with me, and then move on to the next one. I was every motivational author’s, seminar speaker’s, healer’s dream.

All of this because I thought I was doing it wrong.

One day I got tired of it. I got tired of judging myself. Of never feeling enough. Of the never-ending list of ways I could get it right.

And, I just decided to be me. I decided to get over doing it right, and just see what happened. That’s when I let love in. Love for myself exactly as I was. That’s when I started feeling an overwhelming joy for life and all that it is like I had never felt before. That’s when the heart-to-heart connection with others that I thought I had to be perfect for started showing up in my life. Turns out, I didn’t need to be perfect. I just needed to be accepting.

Don’t Let Anyone Tell You You’re Doing It Wrong

You see, no one gets to be you. No one can be you. So, their opinions on how you should do things don’t apply to you. Even your own opinions don’t matter. The mind likes to make us feel like we must be screwing up. It is constantly chasing after more, and never content with what it has in the moment. The mind resists what is and has a very hard time just being present.

You are you for a reason, and you make the decisions that your soul is guiding you to take. You have come here to experience certain things. But the mind likes to judge: bad, wrong, not good enough. Be what you are. And stop judging yourself for it.

Let others be what they are. Love them for it.

I don’t go to workshops anymore. I don’t read those books that make me feel like less of a person because I’m not doing it right. I’ve decided just to experience the moment and see where it takes me. I’m having a lot more fun. A lot more love for everything is flowing through my life. Because I see that everything is exactly what it is. It just is.

Yes, I still like to drink my green juice, or meditate when I feel like my mind needs centering. I still look deeply at the wounds inside myself and work on healing them just like I do a paper cut. But, I don’t do any of these things because I feel like I’m somehow not enough. I do them for the same reason I sometimes like to drink pink champagne for breakfast. Because they bring my life more joy.

Instead of judging myself for having the “wrong” thoughts like I did after reading, The Secret, I don’t have to think about them. I’m having better thoughts automatically because I’m not trying to control how things should be. I’m just letting my thoughts appear as they are. I’m letting myself appear as I am. (All that money I was trying to manifest? I found out I had it all along, once I stopped spending it on all the self-help seminar/webinar/workshops!)

No more seminars. No more workshops. Just love for what is. Gratitude that everything is exactly as it should be. Even when it makes me itch.

That’s what I want to give myself. And that’s what I want to give the world. I am enough. This moment is everything. And so are you.

Wanna Skype? Contact me at  yourownlifejourney@gmail.com, and let’s chat. 

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“If you do follow your bliss you put yourself on a kind of track that has been there all the while, waiting for you, and the life that you ought to be living is the one you are living. Follow your bliss and don’t be afraid, and doors will open where you didn’t know they were going to be.”
― Joseph Campbell

 

Are you afraid of following your bliss? A lot of people are. People are afraid of doing what they love, of being happy. They are afraid if they come across as too happy or full of too much joy that people will dislike them, or they will be thought of as selfish. I’ve got news for you. You can’t fully give your gift to the world until you are following your bliss.

It is a trap of society that makes us feel like we just have to get through to the weekend, or that we have to be with partners we don’t fit with any more, or that we can’t move to a new country, or that we must stay in the job we hate. If you aren’t happy, if you’re not following your bliss, then you aren’t giving your true self to the world. When you aren’t giving your true self to the world, everyone suffers.

There’s something inside you that knows when you’re in the center, that knows when you’re on the beam or off the beam. And if you get off the beam to earn money, you’ve lost your life. And if you stay in the center and don’t get any money, you still have your bliss.-Joseph Campbell

 

If you aren’t feeling happy about your job, you aren’t going to be giving your best you to that job. The thing is many people sleepwalk through their lives and don’t even stop to realize they aren’t really happy. I knew someone who worked so hard and had such a hectic travel schedule with their job that they actually had to be hospitalized because of stress. Still this person proclaimed that they loved their work. This was while their drawers and cabinets were full of bottles of Xanax that they took each day just to get through it.

Today, we medicate ourselves with drugs, alcohol, the internet, TV, and many other things, so we don’t have to feel our own unhappiness. I invite you to take an honest look at your life and to ask yourself if you are really present.

And, no, following your bliss doesn’t mean you will feel blissful 100% of the time. It takes hard work to make your dreams come true. Relationships aren’t always easy, and working out the challenges won’t always feel blissful. But, if we know we’ve reached the end, we do ourselves and the other person a favor by letting them go, rather than stringing them along when we could be keeping them (and ourselves) away from a person that is a better match. If our heart is no longer in the job we are doing, we start working on doing something that we can fully put our hearts in. Trust me, your coworkers will appreciate that!

When you choose to live a life of following your bliss, you become immediately aware when things in your life aren’t working the way you want them to. And, you begin the work of creating the life you want to be living. You become present in your life instead of numbing yourself and trying to escape from it.

The Consequences Of Following Your Bliss

“It is my opinion that enjoying yourself in the present and loosening your definition of time slows the aging process.”
― Frederick Dodson, Parallel Universe of Self

 

When you start radiating bliss, something incredible will start happening.  Bliss is a frequency. Our bodies actually respond to bliss on a cellular level. Have you noticed that certain elderly people look nothing like their age? Have you noticed that these certain people are also living a blissful life? They have chosen to be happy, and it shows up in the cells of their body! Have you noticed the extra energy that you have when you are following your bliss? It seems like you don’t get tired or even hungry. You don’t want to stop what you are doing! This is our body responding at a chemical level to bliss.

You also start feeling fully the true pleasures of things because you aren’t using pleasures to medicate yourself. There is a difference between the feeling of tasting a glass of wine and truly tasting it with pleasure and merely drinking it to get the buzz that takes you away from reality. There is a difference in having a sexual experience with someone in which you are truly present and one in which you are just using as a means of escape.

“There is no need for us all to be alike and think the same way, neither do we need a common enemy to force us to come together and reach out to each other. If we allow ourselves and everyone else the freedom to fully individuate as spiritual beings in human form, there will be no need for us to be forced by worldly circumstances to take hands and stand together. Our souls will automatically want to flock together, like moths to the flame of our shared Divinity, yet each with wings covered in the glimmering colors and unique patterns of our individual human expression.”
― Anthon St. Maarten

 

You are also going to attract people and circumstances into your life at the level you are at. Life will seem to flow effortlessly, and give you exactly what you need. You will be more in touch with yourself, so that you will hear the messages of your soul more clearly. You are going to love and accept yourself more easily, and as a result, will start to accept and love others more easily, too.

Bliss is the pathway to love. When we allow bliss to flow through our bodies, we will want give freedom to others to be exactly who they are. This will be easy because we are giving ourselves the freedom to be who we are. We won’t stop at allowing. We will actually support others and help them to follow the calling of their souls. This is the greatest love we can give. We won’t need to control them. We will realize that we were the selfish ones for expecting them to show up a certain way.

Following your bliss gives your life meaning, belonging, and a sense of purpose. So, tune into your deepest dreams and desires. They are there for a reason. Stop treating them as mere fantasies. That is your soul calling. How are you going to answer?

Do you want to follow your bliss?

Do you want help getting started?

I can help!

Jump on Skype with me. I offer Skype coaching sessions to help you with creating and loving your life. 

Email me at yourownlifejourney@gmail.com.

If you liked this article, then please follow me on Twitter and Facebook.

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