Canceling my Lingo account was an absolute nightmare. In the end I spent nearly three hours on the phone before I was finally able to speak to someone who would process the cancellation.

I never spoke to anyone in their Cancellation Department. Honestly, I’m not sure that that department has any employees. In the end it came down to a war of attrition. I had to wait on hold and complain vigorously enough that they finally decided I was serious about wanting to close the account.

Many companies understand that when a customer calls to cancel, they have an opportunity to save that account. After this dreadful experience not only will I refuse to do business with Lingo again, I’ll tell everyone I can to avoid them like the plague.

Below is the log that I kept while trying to cancel my account. I’ve done a little grammatical cleanup from the notes I originally posted during the phone calls.

Several weeks ago I made the decision to close my voip account with Lingo in favor of just using my cell phone. I got a new cell phone for my house and transferred my phone number from Lingo to my cell provider. Now I’m trying to cancel my Lingo service… what a joke. As I started writing this I’d been on hold for exactly one hour.

Friday, December 17th:

• 11:30am – I first called Lingo. I listen to the recorded message and navigate their menu system to talk to Customer Service.
• 11:46am – I waited on hold for 16 minutes before talking to a guy who took my account information and put me back on hold.
• 11:47a – He’s going to transfer me to the cancellation department.
• 11:52a – The guy asked for a callback number. The cancellation department is too busy to take my call. From the way that he is talking about it it sounds like the cancellation department is one person who is out to lunch. He said that someone would try to call me back in the next 48 hours. I told him that this was unacceptable because I don’t want to continue paying for service that I’m not using. He’s going to try again so I go back on hold.
• 12:02p – He still can’t transfer me because no one is available to take the call. I ask to speak to a manager and am placed back on hold.
• 12:03p – The manager is too busy to speak to me. I tell guy that I’ll hold for the manager.
• 12:06p – I finally get to speak to a supervisor. I express frustration about this situation and ask what she can do to help. She is very nice but absolutely no help at all. She says that there is nothing she can do except continue trying to transfer my call. Because I have no other options, I agree.
• 12:37p – I’ve been on this call for over an hour now and am still on hold. I should have used a landline for this call. This is chewing through my cell minutes.
• 12:50p – Lingo wins this round. It’s easy for me to sit on hold while I’m working at my desk but I have to go to a meeting. I am extremely frustrated!

December 22nd: my second attempt

• 9:09am – Called Lingo back. Went through their menu system and am on hold again.
• 9:20a – got a recorded message saying that they are too busy to take my call and asking me to please call back during normal business hours. According to their website, they’ve been open for over two hours already today (Mon – Fri: 9AM – 9PM EST)… this is normal business hours!
• 9:21a – I call back and am again placed on hold.
• 9:33a – I got the recorded message again and was disconnected. I called back immediately. I really wish that their hold music had more than just one song being played over and over and over…

Gotta love their “Terms and Conditions“:

Cancellations will only be accepted via phone through Lingo’s Account Management Department at the toll-free number listed on the first page of your invoice, and will be effective upon the date that you cancel with a Lingo Account Management Representative. You will be given a cancellation confirmation number by the representative. Service cancellation requests by mail, e-mail, fax, equipment return, or any other form of non-telephonic communication requests will not be accepted.

We only accept cancellations by phone. Also, we don’t answer calls to that phone.

• 9:44a – Disconnected again. Called back again. I guess that their system is programmed to hang up on me every 11 minutes.
• 9:55a – Disconnected again. Called back again. I guess that it’s more likely that the system hangs up on me after being on hold for 10 minutes. The extra minute is probably just the time it takes me to call and get back in the queue.
• 10:06a – Disconnected again. Called back again. At least I was smart enough to route the calls through Google Voice this time so I’m not using my cell’s minutes.
• 10:17a – Disconnected again. Calling back again. I think I’ll try connecting to the billing department again (that’s who I spoke with last Friday). They still put me on hold for the Cancellations Department but at least I didn’t have to keep calling back.
• 10:26a – Spoke to a Customer Support Representative. She verified my information and then put me back on hold. She gave me instructions on how to call back “just in case we’re disconnected.” What a joke.
• 10:32a – a manager is on the line. She said that since I’ve been on hold for so long and since I had spoken to a manager on Friday that she would cancel the account for me. On Friday I was told that the manager I spoke with didn’t have the authority to cancel an account. I don’t understand her logic for finally accepting the cancellation but I really don’t care. Just close this account! I asked her for a confirmation number and was put back on hold while she processes the cancellation.
• 10:36a – The manager processed the account and I have just sent me an email with the cancellation confirmation. This process has been an absolute joke!

The moral of this story: Don’t signup for service with Lingo. It’s not worth it.

DISCLAIMER: I’ve only tested this on Ubuntu 9.04 (Jaunty) server.

$ sudo aptitude install -y imagemagick
$ sudo aptitude install -y libmagick9-dev
$ sudo gem install rmagick

And you’re done! You can verify the installation using this irb command, taken from the RMagick HOWTO:

$ sudo irb -rubygems -r RMagick
irb(main):001:0> puts Magick::Long_version
This is RMagick 2.10.0 ($Date: 2009/06/19 22:07:05 $) Copyright (C) 2009 by Timothy P. Hunter
Built with ImageMagick 6.4.5 2009-06-04 Q16 OpenMP http://www.imagemagick.org
Built for ruby 1.8.7
Web page: http://rmagick.rubyforge.org
Email: rmagick@rubyforge.org
=> nil

[10:40][root@iPhone:~]$ chsh
-bash: chsh: command not found

I next thought to modify /etc/passwd but, according to the file’s header, that’s not going to help.

[10:41][root@iPhone:~]$ cat /etc/passwd 
#
# 4.3BSD-compatable User Database
#
# Note that this file is not consulted for login.
# It only exisits for compatability with 4.3BSD utilities.
#
# This file is automatically re-written by various system utilities.
# Do not edit this file.  Changes will be lost.
#
nobody:*:-2:-2:Unprivileged User:/var/empty:/usr/bin/false
root:*:0:0:System Administrator:/var/root:/bin/sh
mobile:*:501:501:Mobile User:/var/mobile:/bin/sh
daemon:*:1:1:System Services:/var/root:/usr/bin/false
_securityd:*:64:64:securityd:/var/empty:/usr/bin/false
_mdnsresponder:*:65:65:mDNSResponder:/var/empty:/usr/bin/false
_sshd:*:75:75:sshd Privilege separation:/var/empty:/usr/bin/false
_unknown:*:99:99:Unknown User:/var/empty:/usr/bin/false

Finally I found /etc/master.passwd. I just modified root and mobile to use /bin/bash instead of /bin/sh and on my next login I was using bash!

[10:41][root@iPhone:~]$ cat /etc/master.passwd 
##
# User Database
# 
# This file is the authoritative user database.
##
nobody:*:-2:-2::0:0:Unprivileged User:/var/empty:/usr/bin/false
root:5IS3K.2i/ciLw:0:0::0:0:System Administrator:/var/root:/bin/bash
mobile:NhbBgPU3IOnek:501:501::0:0:Mobile User:/var/mobile:/bin/bash
daemon:*:1:1::0:0:System Services:/var/root:/usr/bin/false
_securityd:*:64:64::0:0:securityd:/var/empty:/usr/bin/false
_mdnsresponder:*:65:65::0:0:mDNSResponder:/var/empty:/usr/bin/false
_sshd:*:75:75::0:0:sshd Privilege separation:/var/empty:/usr/bin/false
_unknown:*:99:99::0:0:Unknown User:/var/empty:/usr/bin/false

Getting TFS to use P4Merge isn’t difficult but neither is it intuitive. For a merge operation P4Merge expects four files to exist:

1. the original, base file
2. file with conflicting change #1
3. file with conflicting change #2
4. final, merged file

Unfortunately TFS doesn’t create the merged file (#4) until after the merge tool is invoked. A simple batch script will solve the problem though. Save this as p4merge.bat.

@ECHO OFF
COPY /Y NUL ""%4""
START /WAIT /D "C:\Program Files\Perforce\" p4merge.exe ""%1"" ""%2"" ""%3"" ""%4""

This script will create the merge file and invoke p4merge.exe.

Now you can configure TFS to use P4Merge by running this command from a Visual Studio command prompt: tf diff /configure

That will bring up a dialog:

If an entry already exists for the Merge operation you can add it. Otherwise just modify the existing entry to point to the batch file we created:

Note that you must set the command to be your batch file, not the executable.

And that’s it! Next time TFS launches a merge tool, it will use P4Merge.

As a software version control system, I dislike TFS intensely.

In the short time I’ve been using TFS I’ve had several problems with code that was merged incorrectly. I’ve seen problems where TFS silently allowed older versions of code to overwrite newer versions. I could probably fill an entire blog post airing grievances with TFS but I thought it would be more interesting to describe how I use git on top of TFS to solve some of these problems.

First, to use git to track a TFS repository it is really important that all your source code be on a Fat32 partition. TFS locks files and NTFS respects that lock. Fat32 will track the lock but doesn’t enforce it. This allows git to modify files (change to different versions of files) without necessarily having those files checked out in TFS.

Using TFS I checked out all my code into s:\src. I then created a new git repository in that same directory and added everything into the git repository.

For working I maintain at least two branches. My master branch always matches TFS. When I need the latest code from TFS I switch to the git master branch, pull from TFS then commit all changes into git. My working branch contains my current code changes. I also have one branch dev that contains a single commit consisting of all my debug code that should never be checked in to TFS.

When I’m ready to start coding I get the latest code from TFS and commit those changes into git’s master branch. I create a new git branch, working. I cherry pick my development code from dev into working. Then I do all my coding on that branch. When I need to get code from TFS I can swtich to master, update from TFS, check that code in to git then either merge or rebase the changes back into working.

Once all of my changes in working are complete I need to merge the changes back into master so that I can commit them to TFS. I can’t do a straight merge becuase my cherry-picked dev code would be included. So I have two ways of doing this:

1. cherry-pick changes from working, applying them to master
2. backout the development code (using git rebase -i) then merge changes back into master

After going through one of these two options I end up back on master with all of my code changes. I then commit the changes to TFS. Once that is done I delete working and recreate it from master next time I need it.

Working like this has been great for me. If there are conflicts when merging my code changes, git takes care of it. This way I can almost always avoid having to let TFS merge anything.

This is my general way of working but you can easily see how to apply these same principles when you want to work on multiple different changes using multiple different branches in git.

One thing to note: When you’re working like this git’s history isn’t great. This isn’t like git-svn where you get a seperate git revision for every svn revision. For me, using git with TFS isn’t about being able to track my changes over time. I just want to make sure that my changes aren’t lost and I don’t want to clobber anyone else’s changes.

As far as I could tell, any apps that were running when I got into this problem state would continue working fine. The OS would never completely freeze but I noticed that my CPU started being monopolized by CrashReporter. I tried killing that process but it would just immediately relaunch and peg the CPU again. I looked inside /Library/Logs/CrashReporter/ and saw that a new crash log was being created about every three seconds. The crash logs were for many different applications but none of the stack traces was useful. I had trouble spotting a pattern to what might trigger the problem.

Once my box was in the bad state I tried to ssh in to see if I could gather any useful information. SSH would prompt me for a password but it always denied access saying that I had entered an invalid password.

The only way out of this state was to restart the machine. When I tried to reboot, OS X would successfully log out but then get stuck on a blue screen. I would see the indeterminate NSProgressIndicator for a few seconds then it would disappear for a few seconds then come back again. I was forced to power cycle the machine.

I finally noticed that when this problem occurred, the first crash log was always for securityd. /Library/Logs/CrashReporter/securityd_2009-03-23-204700_macpro.crash:

Process:         securityd [22]
Path:            /usr/sbin/securityd
Identifier:      securityd
Version:         ??? (???)
Code Type:       X86 (Native)
Parent Process:  launchd [1]
 
Date/Time:       2009-03-23 20:47:00.211 -0600
OS Version:      Mac OS X 10.5.6 (9G55)
Report Version:  6
 
Exception Type:  EXC_BAD_ACCESS (SIGSEGV)
Exception Codes: KERN_INVALID_ADDRESS at 0x0000000001000000
Crashed Thread:  0

This information finally led me to the solution.

The problem was that securityd would crash then any app that needed to authenticate was unable to do so. One newsgroup noted that the problem could be temporarily solved by relaunching the process:

$ launchctl load /System/Library/LaunchDaemons/com.apple.securityd.plist

After a bit more searching I found a permanent answer in a mailing list archive: Keychain access crashing on SecKeychainFindGenericPassword. The solution was incredibly simple (and completely unintuitive). I had to remove the file /var/db/CodeEquivalenceDatabase and reboot. That’s it!

The thread offers more details but basically, “that file [/var/db/CodeEquivalenceDatabase] has gotten corrupted and runs securityd into an endless memory-eating loop that (usually) ends up running your system out of memory and into the ground.”

WARNING: Gross generalizations and simplifications below. I’m not trying to offend anyone, just describe my experiences.

Most of the contract work I’ve done has been for people who are not technically savvy. They come to me with a very vague idea of the software they want. They expect me to tell them how much it will cost before we’ve discussed specific requirements. When the requirements are incomplete or incorrect they expect that I’ll just fix it without additional cost to them.

Not all of my contract experience has been negative. In fact, most of it has worked out quite well. Usually both my client and myself are pleased with the software and the cost of building it. But I’ve had enough negative experiences to be careful when considering a new job.

Part of the problem is that it is nearly impossible for anyone to completely define the scope of a project. There is always some miscommunication or misunderstanding, there is always some unforseen problem.

“You want me to setup a blog for your company? No problem, I can get WordPress setup for you in an hour.”

“Wait, I didn’t realize that by ‘blog’ you meant store front application that can accept payments, handle accounts payable, accounts receivable and inventory tracking. That will take slightly more than an hour.”

That kind of situation actually isn’t bothersome to me. As a contractor it is part of my job to understand what you want before making a bid. If a potential client obviously doesn’t know what they want, I can either decline to bid on that job or I can adjust my bid to account for a large amount of unknown. I don’t love it, but that type of risk is manageable.

The part of contract work that I dislike is being forced to compromise quality. When I’m working on a fixed cost contract, it is in my best interest to deliver exactly what is specified, as quickly as possible. As long as my client is reasonably happy with the deliverable, I am going to get paid $20k regardless of whether it took two days, two weeks or two months to create. I don’t get additional money for clean code. I don’t get extra for having good test coverage.

When I complete a project more quickly than I had anticipated there is no problem. I can spend time verifying that the code is tight and that everything is working as expected. But if I am running behind schedule, it becomes more difficult to care about testing the code or fixing “little” bugs.

There may be a bug in the code where order totals aren’t calculated correctly, but what are the odds that my client will notice the bug before he signs off on the project? If he does find the problem and I correct it, will he think to test for that same bug in every release?

This is the dilemma that makes contract work difficult for me. If I see a bug in my code, I’m going to fix it. If I’m writing a tricky or important calculation (like calculating totals), I’m going to write a test. I need to have confidence that my code is doing what I expect. I’ve never shipped any software that didn’t have a list of known bugs but I have also never shipped any software in which I didn’t have a high level of confidence that it was working correctly.

For me, doing the bare minimum isn’t an option for two reasons:

1. Quality is extremely important to me. I can’t just hack something together that meets the contract requirements. When I write software, I want to deliver my personal best.
2. Most of the time, the fast/crappy way of implementing something simply doesn’t occur to me.

I understand a company’s need to understand cost before approving custom softare. But if you want me to do contract work, pay me on an hourly basis. I’ll give you a projected timeline for project completion.

With an hourly rate, you only pay me for the time I actually spend working. With an hourly rate I know that I won’t lose money just because I insist on high-quality code. We’ll both be happier in the long run.

The tools that I use for C#.NET are pretty standard:

• Microsoft Visual Studio 2008 (with ReSharper)
• SQL Server Management Studio
• .NET Memory Profiler to chase down memory leaks
• AQtime to help locate performance problems
• Outlook and Skype to stay connected to coworkers
• Team Foundation Server (TFS) for tracking work items and for version control
• cygwin to make the command line in Windows behave somewhat normally

The one thing that is sorta strange about how I do my C#.NET work is that I do everything on a Mac Pro with XP running in VMWare Fusion. I’ve had a similar setup at home for a couple of years but I’ve only had this setup at work since January.

There are definitely a few quirks that I had to get used to, working in Windows running in a VM on OS X. But the benefits of this setup far outweigh any inconvenience. The ability to take snapshots of the entire VM is awesome! If a program screws with my registry and Windows starts acting funky I just roll back to the last snapshot!

The other huge benefit to working in VMWare is memory. Unless you’re using 64-bit Windows (which can be problematic for many reasons) you are limited to 2 GB of memory. Windows sucks at managing virtual memory so I always try to keep my open applications below that 2 GB limit. Since my Mac has 12 GB of memory, if I need to do something else, I can just boot up a second VM.

Most of the software that I’ve written for OS X has been personal projects. Nothing fancy, just various tools to scratch some itch. Since getting my iPhone I’ve been doing more work in Objective-C and Cocoa.

Because I’ve done so much work with managed and interpreted languages, it feels a little weird to work in unmanaged C/ObjC. But it is kinda cool too. Objective-C is a fairly simple language and Cocoa is a very nice framework. There are some things that I don’t like about Obj-C (not having namespaces and gimpy string manipulation come immediately to mind) but I really appreciate being able to actually use Cocoa controls for UI work. It is almost unthinkable to do GUI development for Windows without buying a set of third-party controls.

My must-have software for writing Mac/iPhone applications:

• XCode and Interface Builder
• Instruments
• MacPorts to install all of the software that is missing from the base OS X install
• Mail.app, Syrinx, Adium and Colloquy to keep in touch with other developers

And finally, a few additional pieces of software that are invaluable to me. These are helpful regardless of what type of software I am writing.

• OmniFocus to help me Get Things Done
• git for source control (don’t tell anyone but I keep my TFS repositories checked into git too)
• Terminal.app for a whole bunch of things
• PathFinder because Finder doesn’t always cut it
• GeekTool to keep an eye on logs
• vim
• screen
• Photoshop
• iTunes to help keep me in The Zone!

When I’m working in Java I always prefer to use JetBrains’ excellent IntelliJ IDEA. However, this past year I didn’t have a license for IntelliJ. I tried every free IDE I could find and wound up choosing Eclipse. I’ve used Eclipse periodically over the last several years. I don’t really like it but I dislike it less than the other free alternatives.

My work was completely server-side and didn’t involve developing a database component. Most of my development was done on OS X but I was deploying to Ubuntu so I did work there also. I used maven to build, test and deploy. I’m not a unit-test fanatic but, in this case unit testing was invaluable.

My setup for both PHP and Python is the same. When I’m working on Mac I use either TextMate or vim. I haven’t done a great deal of Python work but over the past several years I’ve tried to find a PHP IDE that I like… I’m still looking.

I started out doing my Ruby work using TextMate and Terminal.app. I didn’t have any major complaints. There are some nice plugins and various tricks that are handy. But personally, I prefer an IDE. I’ve heard some people say that IDEs make us lazy. Ok, I’m lazy. But I’m also far more productive when I have a good IDE. When JetBrains started issung beta releases of RubyMine, TextMate was history!

RubyMine’s GUI for easily stepping through code in the debugger is great. The inline code analysis is nice for quickly catching typos and the code completion can be useful too. But for me, the best part about having RubyMine is the navigation and documentation.

When I’m working with other developers (or even with frameworks that I didn’t write), I don’t always know exactly what a method does. Being able to instantly bring up documentation is awesome! If I need more information, I hate wasting time trying to hunt down a method buried in code that I am not familiar with. With one key-stroke RubyMine takes me to the code I’m looking for.

I am definitely a fan of JetBrains’ production. IntelliJ is awesome, RubyMine is awesome, and VisualStudio is just broken without ReSharper. There is certainly a learning curve to these tools but once you’ve memorized the key strokes, the code you need is always right in front of you. And the best part part is that the key bindings are the same across each of JetBrain’s products!

One last application that deserves to be mentioned is Navicat. Navicat is by far the best application that I’ve found for working with MySQL or PostgreSQL. Unfortunately, that’s not saying much. I have spent a lot of time using SQL Server and Microsoft’s related tools and, as far as I can tell, there is nothing for MySQL that is even in the same league.

Don’t misunderstand me. Navicat is a great tool. Allowing me to save connections to different servers with many different login credentials is a lifesaver, especially the ability to tunnel the connections over ssh. Being able to do basic server management via a GUI is nice too. But when I need to design a database, I always turn back to SQL Server Management Studio.