If there’s one thing you don’t see very often at Oktoberfest, it’s a vegetable.

Navigating the menu at an Oktoberfest tent is not always easy for vegetarians. Here, a plate of sliced-up sausage qualifies as a salad. But even inside those tents named after the animal they are best at cooking, one can find at least a couple of meatless dishes. Bavarian vegetarian food is heavy, creamy, cheesy, and infinitely starchy: actually, not such bad attributes for a meal that’s accompanying many liters of beer. Now that you’ve found a seat in one of the tents, here are some of the vegetarian dishes you are most likely to find on the menu:

• Käsespätzle: As a vegetarian living in Munich, I have eaten more käsespätzle than you can shake a stick at. This Bavarian version of macaroni and cheese (with fried onions on top) can range from magically delicious to heavy as a rock. Actually, usually the first several bites are magically delicious, and the last several are the rock-like ones. The best Oktoberfest käsespatzle I’ve had was at the small tent Heinz Wurst- und Hühnerbraterei.
• Rahmschwammerl: this is basically creamed mushrooms with a big German dumpling or two. Not my favorite dish, but it is vegetarian.
• Pasta of some sort: this will be horribly overcooked, but depending on how many beers you’ve had, you might not care.
• Obatzda/Obatzder: this creamy Bavarian cheese spread tastes delicious on pretzels.
• Potato salad: the Bavarian version is mayo-less, and therefore possibly your lightest option. This also might be the only vegan food available.
• Side salad: Always swimming in a pool of dressing so deep you can drink it.
• Brezn (pretzel): You can order these from your waitress, or buy them off the vendors wandering the aisles of the tent.
• Kaiserschmarrn: Technically a dessert, this dish of chopped-up sweet pancakes is usually big enough to be filling.

Sometimes there’s also a cheese plate available. Personally, my favorite vegetarian Oktoberfest meal is found at, of all places, the Ochsenbraterei (“Ox roaster”) tent. Their Gemüseteller (vegetable plate) contains many different vegetables, all prepared in relatively tasty ways.

The two fancy tents, the Weinzelt and Käfer, offer a few different vegetarian items each, but honestly they’re not all that much better than the dishes you get in the less pricey tents. They just don’t seem to put too much effort into the vegetarian stuff. Still, these offerings can make for a nice break from käsespatzle if you’re spending multiple days at the wiesn. The Weinzelt especially excels at variety in food offerings.

Outside of the tents, there’s plenty of carnival food to be had. Stands selling cones of tasty candied nuts are everywhere, offering up the only non-cheese vegetarian protein source for miles. I like the chili almonds (Chili Mandeln). Sandwich stands usually have at least one boring cheese-on-a-roll option. Some other stands just sell hunks of cheese. If you can find them, dark-chocolate-covered chili strawberries on a stick are one of my favorite Oktoberfest treats. Must get a good photo of them this year.

What’s your favorite Oktoberfest food?

I hear that there are still a few tickets available for the Democrats Abroad tables at Oktoberfest this year. Whether you’re local or coming in from out of town, this is sure to be a great opportunity to party at Oktoberfest with a fun group of people. We went to DA’s Oktoberfest tables last year, and it was a blast.

If you plan to try to spend time in the tents on a weekend, I highly recommend securing a reservation of some sort. I’m guessing there aren’t too many other opportunities still floating around out there at this late date.

When? Sunday, October 3rd, 2010

Where? Schottelhamel Tent, Oktoberfest, Munich (I haven’t been to this tent yet, so can’t comment on it.)

How do I sign up? You can purchase tickets online. [Link removed since tickets are sold out.]

More info from Democrats Abroad:

The Munich Chapter is throwing its second annual Oktoberfest Party at the Wiesn, and the tickets are on sale now! The cost is $60 per seat (dollars, not euros!) and includes 2 liters of beer and half a chicken, as well as a reserved seat in the Schottenhamel tent from 11:30 through the end of the day. (For vegetarians and for those don’t drink beer, there are other options.) It’s the last Sunday of the Oktoberfest (October 3), and this is traditionally a very fun night to be in the Schottenhamel tent – for those of you who’d like to stay all day!

The Munich Chapter will place you with a member of DA-Munich (home stays) if you like, or we will help you with hotel reservations if you prefer that option. More details on that later.

Make sure to buy your tickets TODAY! It is very important for you to buy your seats now if you want to come.

The night before the Oktoberfest Party, Steven Hill will be presenting his book Europe’s Promise: Why the European Way Is the Best Hope in an Insecure Age. The event will take place Saturday evening (October 2) at 7pm near the Wiesn, so come to Munich and make a weekend of it! To read more about Steven’s book check out the UCPress website. Or check out his website.

If you have any questions about the Oktoberfest or Steven Hill events, please contact Quaide Williams, the Munich Chapter Chair: DAG-Munich@DemocratsAbroad.org

Is the start of Oktoberfest really less than three weeks away? Time to start warming up…

We arrived in New York exhausted and much later than scheduled, but dammit we we’re going to miss a single NYC meal opportunity. We fell asleep into our delivered Mexican food, and then dreamed about living in a city where one can have Mexican food delivered. Mmmmmm.

Daniel’s Bagel. It’s what’s for breakfast.

Vatan: classy* all-you-can-eat vegetarian Indian food. Instead of making you collect your food at an undignified buffet, at Vatan they bring each person a platter of starters and a platter of mains; you can request more of anything you’d like and the server will bring it to you. Vatan was closed for renovations during our last trip to the city, so I was extra happy to see it open again.

Delicious sushi at a great price at Hane Sushi.

A casual brunch at Cafe Guy & Gallard – a frittata, scallops on polenta. Quite delightful for the price, and quite a change from Europe, where it is apparently against the law to serve more than three scallops on the same plate.

A quick and cheap vegetarian lunch at Red Bamboo. Many of the dishes (such as this veg version of a philly cheese steak) were based on meat substitutes, and they tasted better than they looked.

Fancier sushi at Sushiden in midtown. Plenty good, but seemed overpriced given the sushi we had had a couple days before at Hane.

Bluebell Cafe. A relatively new place that hooked us up with some yummy macaroni and cheese, grilled asparagus, and crab cakes one evening.

Noodly soup and fun cocktails were had at Nooch.

Eggs Florentine and fluffy pancakes for breakfast at Friend of a Farmer.

Two kinds of brownies and raspberry flan at the very exclusive and invitation-only Auntie Dor’s.

We were so delighted every time glasses of icy water were served to us. Yay America!

The absolute culinary highlight this time around was the five-course tasting menu at Pure Food & Wine. Each dish was creative and delicious; the fact that it consisted entirely of raw vegan ingredients was downright amazing. I think their version of creme fraiche was even better than the real thing, and their ice creams left nothing to be desired.

Had we been a little more diligent with the camera, this meal would have earned a blog post all its own. Maybe next trip.

Still hungry? You can keep drooling over the food from our 2008 trip to New York.

What’s your favorite place to eat in NYC?

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* For some reason I felt the urge to work the word “classy” into this post. Probably because I have been watching too much Jersey Shore.

In fact, our next trip might not be until mid-September, when we join a bunch of expat bloggers from around Germany for WEBMU 2010: Bloggers take Hamburg (OK, I just made that name up, but it will be in Hamburg). If you are an expat blogger in Germany, go sign up for the message board and join in the conversation. It’s (for the most part) a friendly group of bloggers. New folks welcome. Last year’s meet-up was in Munich and it was tons of fun.

In other news, I recently start up a new art blog, Flogging the Muse, where you can peek at my recent painting experiments. Come by and say hi. I’ve also been making improvements here at This non-American Life – how do you like the new header images? A new one should come up every time you load the page. There are about 50 photos from our travels in rotation right now (only one of which features dirndl boobs).

Is there anything in particular you’d like to see me blog about? Leave your suggestions in the comments. Or just tell me about all the fun you’re having this summer.

Before we can even order the chef starts sending us little ‘greetings from the kitchen’ – tiny dishes of creative deliciousness – a martini glass of cucumber olive oil soup, eggplant carpaccio with cream cheese and flowers, an oyster on the half shell (OK so this last one didn’t interest us, but the others were heavenly).

I order two courses, one of which is an eggplant thing that usually comes with a bit of prosciutto on top. The waitress assures me that it will be no problem for the chef to make it vegetarian.

She was back a few minutes later with a question for me. “The chef wants to know if he may put some burrata on top of the eggplant dish. Is this OK?” I think maybe I have misheard her. The chef wants my permission to put one of very very favorite cheeses, a cheese you cannot properly get in Munich, on top of my main course? Yes, yes he may.

My smile is permanent by this point, and I don’t think I had even seen the bread basket yet.

Course after course of amazingly delicious food came out, including more of the chef’s ‘greetings’, such as this red currant sorbet. It was one of those meals of rare perfection, where the food was creative and interesting and painfully delicious. Every last bite.

The dessert menu looked heavenly, but we were stuffed so we politely declined (actually I agonized over the decision a bit – I’m not usually a dessert person but I was willing to do almost anything to prevent that meal from ending). Somehow our fullness didn’t stop us from downing most of the tiered tray of handmade chocolates and cookies that was presented to us. When the check came I had to stifle the urge to cry, “Here, take all my money, just tell me I can live at this table forever and ever!” On our way out we were each presented with a tiny gold-embossed case holding two chocolate truffles. I still have mine on my desk (sans truffles, natürlich). Every time I see it I am filled with great longing.

I cannot wait to go back.

Merano is a small spa town in an apple-tree-filled valley in South Tyrol, the part of Italy closest to Munich. It is also Italy’s German-speaking part, a fact that confuses me every time I go.

Merano (Meran in German) itself is little more than a cluster of spa hotels around a giant spa complex nestled in some beautiful scenery. There’s a lovely promenade and some hiking trails, a river, trees, and mountains. There’s not much there to do besides relax. So we relaxed.

We stayed at Sonnenhof, a small hotel a short hike outside of town. The outdoor pool, where we spent most of our time, was surrounded by beautiful flowers, with Alpine peaks peeking down at us from a distance. Mmmmmm relaxing.

We loved everything about this hotel besides the food, which ended up being rather disappointing (especially after the rave reviews we had read online). I hate eating disappointing food in Italy, don’t you? It feels like such a missed opportunity. Luckily we stumbled across a place the next day that made up for our disappointment a million times over. I think it’s the kind of meal that will need its very own post.

-Brian C.

Oktoberfest without dressing up is like a Halloween party without a costume: it’s still a lot of fun, but the right outfit can make it even better. I’d say at least half of Oktoberfest attendees show up in tracht (dirdls or lederhosen) these days, locals and foreigners alike. I’d definitely encourage you to dress up if you can find a way to do it without cutting into your beer budget (and Oktoberfest beer ain’t cheap). So what are your options?

1. Spring for real lederhosen, which will probably run you over €100 (more with shirt and socks). That’s definitely a lot to spend if you’re only planning to attend Oktoberfest once, but on the other hand, you’ll have a kick-ass Halloween costume for the rest of your life. You could try your luck on ebay, or pick some up in Munich. There are tracht shops all over the city center (including about a million branches of Wies’n Tracht und Mehr, which at the very least keeps me entertained with its ad campaigns).
2. Go for fake lederhosen, such as those made of plastic or the Bruno variety. I really, really don’t recommend this route. Look at the guys in the second photo down on this post. You don’t want to look like that.
3. Skip the lederhosen all together and go for a different look. Get a hat or an authentic checked tracht shirt for around €20 and wear it with jeans. Or a lederhosen t-shirt – cheesy, yes, but still much, much better than actual fake lederhosen.
4. Wear a kilt. They have nothing to do with Oktoberfest, but our Scottish friends think it’s a great idea.

Women have it easier: an Oktoberfest-ready dirndl (such as these) can be picked up on ebay for $50 or less (but please stay away from the mini-dress catastrophes on Amazon), and they look just fine. There are also some good deals to be found these days in the many tracht stores along Tal, in the center of Munich.

As for which tents I recommend, it depends on what you’re looking for. All the big tents have more in common than they do differences – big beers, long benches, cheesy music, buxom waitresses – but they all have slightly different personalities. I suggest showing up early on a weekday (when you can still wander into all of the tents) and checking out several of them.  The Hacker tent, Ochsenbraterei, and Schützen Festzelt are all solid choices. The Hofbräu tent has a frat party vibe, and seems to have the highest foreigners-to-Germans ratio. The Weinzelt has wine and fancy food; the Käfer tent has really fancy food and low ceilings. The Hippodrom is where the celebrities hang out, perhaps because they are attracted to colorful streamers.

As far as getting into tents, my main advice is this: go early, and find yourself an unreserved table to park at for the day. On weekends you have to arrive when the tents open if you want a chance of getting a table for the day (although sometimes the tents open back up in the late evening). On weekdays you can usually walk in and out of tents freely until late afternoon, when they all fill up. Since this year is the 200th anniversary of Oktoberfest, it will probably be more crowded than in years past. You also might want to check out my advice for first-time Oktoberfest visitors.

Hey readers: anyone have any great tips on where to get decent-looking lederhosen on the cheap? Please share!

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Ask the Expat is an occasional feature here at This non-American Life. If you have a question for me, go to this post to find out how to submit it.

Found this while sorting through my photos from our recent trip to the US. Sometimes Germany feels like an absurd pit of consumer product marketing (Obama Fingers, anyone?), but the US always manages to take it a billion steps further.

It also reminds me how much I love being served tap water in US restaurants – icy, free tap water. It’s so much better for the environment than bottled, and usually healthier for you, too. Given that Germany tends to be ahead of the US on environmental matters, I’m disappointed that bottled water is still so prevalent here. Alas, in this case the US is moving to be more like Germany instead of the other way around. Perhaps the Germans are worried that tap water will make them fat?

1. There really is a place called Dollywood.
2. I really did go there. Jealous yet?

You may share your boob jokes in the comments.

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There is a special little part of the Great Smoky Mountains where the peanuts are boiled, the t-shirts are air-brushed, and the museums are upside-down. There is so much to see and do in this little pocket of heaven, but the ultimate little piece of kitschy goodness had eluded me until now. Dollywood is a theme park dedicated to thrill rides, folksy crafts, music, and the glorification of God for putting Dolly Parton on this earth. Kettle corn, too.

We had the good fortune of visiting during the ‘Festival of Nations.’ Given the homogeneity of the park guests, it was nice to see a little diversity. Check out this charming young Italian lad:

In addition to the regular park performers such as the Kingdom Heirs (presumptuous much?), the Festival of Nations involves performances from groups from all around the world. We sat down for an acappela show. After a promising first number, one of the young African men on stage started talking about how his life was changed when Christian missionaries came to his little village and shared the love of Jesus with them. We left to go find something that would calm our twisting stomachs, such as a roller coaster. Luckily there were lots of those.

Many of the rides have ‘example cars’ outside the entrance, which larger guests are encouraged to try out for size.

The guided tour of Dolly Parton’s tour bus was led by her number one fan, a local lady who could not say enough wonderful things about the star. As we left the bus she called out that we should be sure to find lunch in one of the park’s many restaurants. “Everything’s been baptized in grease and is absolutely scrumptious!”

I do have one bone to pick with Dolly. The museum in the park – the one covering Dolly’s life journey from poor country girl to international singing superstar? It’s called Chasing Rainbows. Dammit, that’s what I was going to call my museum. She stole my name. Now where will I put my collection of amply-bosomed sequined dresses?

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What will the museum that showcases your life story be called?

Sunday’s cool weather lured me out to see the student art show at the Akademie der Bildenden Künste. Munich’s art academy consists of two main buildings, one old and one new, and getting to wander around in them was half of the fun to me.

As expected for a student show, there was definitely a fair number of duds on display, but a lot of delightful pieces could be found amongst the various exhibition rooms. I was especially impressed with how many works really made me laugh (with them, not at them). Modern German art isn’t exactly known for displaying a sense of humor.

The lawn of the Old Building was spotted with boards for one to poke one’s head through and be photographed. (Do you know what I’m talking about? Why is there no actual word for these things?) Collectively titled “Extreme Situations of Human Existence,” these particular head-cutout-boardy-thingies allowed you to try on the role of combat soldier, 1000-pound man, or crucified Jesus, among other fun stuff.

If you’re interested in seeing the Jahresausstellung, it’s on through next Sunday, July 25th. Be sure to keep an eye out for the big black dildo wearing a priest’s collar. And the beer fountain.