Coffee and chimps: Recipe for apocalypse

Jane Goodall is teaming up with Green Mountain Coffee Roasters to help preserve the habitats of wild chimpanzees in Tanzania's Gombe National Park. That Jane really needs a new hobby after all these years. Anyway, it’s way too cold up in Vermont for chimps, so Green Mountain has nothing to fear. As for the rest of us, well, have you have ever SEEN a chimp after it’s had a couple lattes? First they Riverdance. Next, they take over human jobs – mainly in the HR Departm ent and Accounts Payable. Ultimately, you wind up with an entire planet run by apes and people running around in loincloths, which, by the way, is a vision I keep having after one too many caramel macchiatos. Damn you, Starbucks. Damn you all to hell!

—Posted by David Gianatasio

May 12, 2008 | Permalink