Courage and Compassion: A Dedication to Yourself

Apr 19, 2008

There is a statement once, a teaching, by a very special man – Life is suffering.

There is no one who has not suffered. Some are not aware of it; others are intimately acquainted with the pain in their heart. Others seek – they look for more love, more money, more happiness, satisfaction.

And yet that is only the beginning of his teaching. The remainder sends a message of hope – there is a way out.

Please do not think that because there is pain in your heart, fear in your mind, that there is something wrong with you. Everything I have learnt over the past year points to one simple lesson: the most personal, the darkest and the most painful – is also the most universal.

Please do not be ashamed of your pain, or run away from it. Without it, you cannot grow. Hold it; look deeply into it; love it like a mother comforting her crying baby. With understanding and compassion, you can begin to heal your wounds, and the wounds of the world.

I have been receiving many emails from people lately. They think they are sharing their stories of shame, of sadness, of pain. And yet there is something I see, something they cannot yet see in themselves – all I see is courage and compassion.

Those in pain cannot see themselves for what they are. They cannot see the beauty and the strength they possess. It has been hidden in the haze, covered by the layers of false messages, obscured by the pain.

Many speak of my courage in undertaking my journey. And yet what does my courage have to do with it? It is your own courage that you see, that you are responding to. There is a basic premise in the rich and complex psychology of Carl Jung, it is simple: you see in others what is already in yourself.

Recognise that in yourself. Have respect for your courage. Remember it, always.

Remember, also, to have compassion for yourself. Be soft, be gentle. You are the first person who deserves it, no matter what you believe, no matter what you think you have done. So what if you have been hurtful, spiteful? You were hurtful because that is all you had inside you. Begin to nourish yourself, fill yourself with love – by and by the hurtfulness and pettiness will disappear. What will pour out of you when you have replaced the hate with kindness?

Many teachers talk of the wings of wisdom and compassion. You cannot have one without the other. I used to think wisdom was enough – but I was a fool. I had slowly increasing insight into the human condition, and when I began to look into my own heart, I was afraid and repulsed. I saw the wounds and the weaknesses. It was garish, a mangled mess. So many times, I despaired. I got angry. I pretended the wounds didn’t exist. I did everything I could to run away.

Compassion was lacking, and that meant I could not stay to my journey. A surgeon needs a soft touch when he operates – anything less, and the wounds bleed even more with his scrutiny. Anything less, and we will be overwhelmed when everything we have been afraid of comes pouring out.

Remember always, as you go inwards, to have compassion for yourself.

I still don’t know what this post is about, or what its purpose is – I have never posted anything like this before. But it has been on my mind for so long, and I apologise if it is irrelevant to some readers. Perhaps the only reason I wrote this – is as a reminder, to both you and me – a dedication to all those who have been, who are in pain.

Further Reading: The Blossoming of Love

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42 Comments , Comment or Ping

Adrian

Man, this is one timely post, you nailed it, just right when I needed something like this. Thank you

Apr 19th, 2008
Ben

Think you got it just right dude. Sometimes you just have to say what you feel and no worry about there being a point.

Peace

Apr 19th, 2008
Tom Stine

Albert, who cares why you wrote it. The point is, you said it perfectly:

“Remember always, as you go inwards, to have compassion for yourself.”

I hope you are listening to your own words. With joy, my friend…..

Apr 19th, 2008
chehaw

These words are so powerful, and so timely. Thanks for pouring them out.

Apr 19th, 2008
Akemi - Yes to Me

Albert! I think you are really maturing. Good for you to have the courage to write this post.
It also seems to me, through writing your blog and reading and responding to your readers, you have sharpened your intuition to the level you can sense your Higher Power. Our Higher Power doesn’t always fit nicely into our existing reasoning, so it’s scary sometimes, but it can bring true wisdom to us.

Keep going on your journey!

Blessings,

Apr 19th, 2008
Albert (http://thoughtsintime.co.za/)

Very nice post. I am beginning to think that the only problem with pain and suffering is that we resist & try to avoid it.

I scribbled something related on boredom and loneliness recently: http://thoughtsintime.co.za/20.....k-for-you/

Apr 19th, 2008
Albert

Thank you so much everyone! Yes, this post is definitely a reminder to myself as well. I needed to read it as much as everyone else.

Apr 19th, 2008
Evan

Hi Albert,

I think you wrote it to confront a demon. The shadow of the (intellectual) enlightenment-only line is the psychopath. Compassion is vital. My favourite image is the fire that provides both light and warmth.

At the risk of being obnoxious. How is it you see other’s courage and not your own? Be gentle with yourself my friend.

Apr 19th, 2008
Ariff

Lovely article. Thanks for sharing.

Apr 19th, 2008
Barbara

Evan,

An empath always can feel and see what others are feeling. Sometimes as clear as day. It is a continuing task to have that much clarity for oneself, however. It is my impression that is what Albert may also be experiencing.

And only because I’ve been in the identical position.

Apr 19th, 2008
Nur

Apr 19th, 2008
Andrea Hess|Empowered Soul

Beautiful, beautiful post, Albert. It so obviously came from your heart. The energy of compassion comes across loud and clear in your words, and it resonates within each of your readers. And then we can bring that compassion into our relationship with ourselves.

Thank you and blessings,
Andrea

Apr 20th, 2008
Boat

Thank you, Albertใ

Apr 20th, 2008
David

Thank you Albert. I really needed this one. As I pay more and more attention to the babble that goes on in my head I sometimes fall into becoming critical of the content, which of course, as Eckhart Tolle tells us, is the ego coming back in through the back door. Loving compassion is the key to lock the back door.

Apr 20th, 2008
Albert

Thank you so much everyone. I wasn’t sure if posts like this would be well accepted, so I’m really glad that this has been taken so well given the emails and comments. I do realise that I am one of the people who need to hear this message for myself. I am really happy that you all liked this, that it has touched you.

Apr 20th, 2008
MrAchievement.com (Stanley Bronstein)

This was indeed a wonderful post. Like so many things in life, they are better when they come from our heart …

I hope your time allows for more postings in the future. Your blog is DEFINITELY worth reading.

Take care

Stanley F. Bronstein
MrAchievement
Attorney, CPA, Author & Professional Motivational Speaker

Apr 20th, 2008
Patricia - Spiritual Journey Of A Lightworker

Albert, personally I think this is the best post that you have written in awhile. Like Andrea said, it came from your heart and those are always the best. The are words of wisdom for all of us to follow. Love as well as compassion truly begins with ourselves. The articles that we write for ourselves sometimes have a really bi impact on others as well. This is a good example of that. Have a glorious day.
Patricia

Apr 20th, 2008
rmt

I really needed to hear these words today. Thanks for having the courage to post them. Take care.

Apr 20th, 2008
Albert

Thank you everyone, I’m grateful you like it.

Apr 20th, 2008
Liara Covert

The man who said ‘life is suffering’ also deduced that suffering is a human belief and illusion. The thing is, as human beings begin to remove one veil that clouds their perception, they tend to replace it with other ones to cloud their judgement again. The key is to move beyond such a vicious circle to discover what lies beyond. Indescribable truth must be felt.

Apr 20th, 2008
Albert

That is beautiful Liara - removing the illusion is definitely one of the paradoxes of the path, I believe.

Apr 21st, 2008
Birdsong

Sometimes compassion can be painful, and that pain a blessing!
Thank you, you lovely child of the universe!

Apr 21st, 2008
Ben T

Wonderful words - just the sort of confidence booster I need on a Monday morning - more short Monday musings please ! Save longer, more structured articles for later in the week, when my brain is more ready to absorb them

Apr 21st, 2008
Albert

Thank you Ben and Birdsong! I might write some shorter posts like you said, they’re very awesome in their own way!

Apr 22nd, 2008
Michelle Vandepas

Albert, I’ll be 50 this year. You can’t make it through life to this age without having a lot of pain - some real, some imagined in life. Compassion for yourself and time often helps heal.
Nice well written post.
BTW. Did you know CK tagged you on her last post?

Apr 22nd, 2008
Albert

Hey Michelle - thank you for that. I just saw the tag from CK, looks like a very fun meme, and she’s got a great sense of humor!

Apr 22nd, 2008
Liara Covert

Albert, I agree with you that removing veils we create can be a truly beautiful experience. It can be earth-shattering and life-transforming, if we’re ready and choose it to be so. Great reflections you share.

Apr 23rd, 2008
Eulerian

A wise buddy of mine, told me this..which stuck to my mind forever - everything teaches us something. Your post just opens up the gateway of learning when we confront pain and darkness….wisdom and compassion with an awareness free from any attachment is what we all need…thanks for this wonderful post.

Apr 24th, 2008
Albert

Thank you Liara and Eulierian… those are really great compliments

Apr 24th, 2008
Jenna

Very true — without pain, you can not grow. The most difficult things I have had to face throughout life have made me a stronger and better person. Great post!

Apr 26th, 2008
Albert

Thanks Jenna

Apr 26th, 2008
Kenneth King

Wonderful words. Wisdom without compassion is practically useless. Coming to terms with your pain and then nuturing yourself; knowing that what you see in others what you see in yourself. It took me 30+ years of living to truly “get” this. Postings like this can save people lots of time. Thanks for sharing.

May 2nd, 2008
Albert

Hi Kenneth. That is very high praise, and I really appreciate it. I’m glad you got something from this post

May 2nd, 2008
Eva

I used to be a pessimistic gal. But I learn to be brave. Courage and compassion is the key for enjoyable life.

May 12th, 2008
Albert

Thank you Eva !

May 12th, 2008
health

thanks bro

May 25th, 2008
Adam

It’s only a shame if you continually to make the same mistake and not learn from it. Well written article. I enjoyed it.

Jun 3rd, 2008
Albert

Thanks Health and Adam!

Jun 3rd, 2008
Luis

I have been reading you posts for a long time now, and they’ve deeply helped me… this one, in particular: BEAUTIFUL… I came in looking for yet another technique for facing my fears, and realised I am already starting my journey and all I need right now is exactly what this post is about… thank you for every word!

Jun 23rd, 2008
Albert

Hey Luis, thank you so much. That was a really heartfelt comment, and I appreciate it.

Jun 24th, 2008
Danny

Thank you, Albert.
This is my very first time reading your post and I’m so moved by your true and beautiful words. It’s been a while since I thought life is full of suffering. What’s the ultimate meaning of living it！But through this post, I saw my shallowness and shortcomings, that’s is I’m so in pain that obscured recognizing the true self that makes me so unconfident about myself. I should walk out of that dark shadow of pain and see myself in a brand new different way.

Oct 8th, 2008
Albert

Hey Danny, thank you so much for that. A very heartfelt comment.

Oct 8th, 2008