I'm a thief

 

I stole this idea from Dan. Unabashedly.

He took a movie synopsis and ran it through Google's translation tool to a foreign language and then ran it back to English and wanted to see if people could guess the correct movie.

I'm doing something similar, but just using the AOLer Translator.

So, here are the snyopses of five movies in AOL speak. Can you guess them all?

1. XXXXXX FOLOWS FIEV NU YORKERS FROM TEH PERSPECTIEV OF HAND H3LD VIEDO CMARA!!11!! OMG LOL TEH MOVEI SI 3XACTLEY DA LENGTH OF A DV TAEP AND A SUB-PLOT SI ASTABLISHED BY SHOWNG BITS AND PEICES OF VIEDO PR3VIOSLEY RECORDAD ON TEH TAEP TAHT SI BNG RECORD3D OV3R!!!!! LOL TEH MOVEI STARTS AS A MONST3R OF UNKNOWN ORIGIN DASTROYS A BUILDNG!1!11!111 OMG AS THEY GO 2 INVASTIGAET PARTS OF TEH BUILDNG AND DA H3AD OF TEH STATU3 OF LIEBRTY COM3 RANENG DOWN!!111 OMG WTF TEH MOVEI FOLOWS THEYRE ADVANTURA TRYNG 2 3SCAEP AND SAEV A FREIND A LUV INTARAST OF TEH MANE CHARACTER!11!1! WTF LOL

2. WHEN DA SPAEC SHUTLE SI DASTROY3D IN OUTER SPAEC ASTRONOM3RS AT NASA DISCOV3R TAHT A M3TAOR SHOWER SI PALTNG AWAY AT EARTH AND TAHT A HUG3 ASTAROID CAPABLA OF DESTROYNG TEH PLAENT SI HEAEDD FOR A DIERCT HIT WIT DA PLAENT!11!!!1 WIT AL OPTIONS 2 FANTASTIC 2 IMPL3MENT BFORE COLISION NASA D3CIEDS 2 R3CRUIT TEH WORLDS BST OIL DRIL3RS 2 LAND ON TEH AST3ROID DRIL A HOLE DROP A NUCLEAR BOMB IN2 TEH HOL3 TH3N TAEK OF AND RAMOTELEY DE2NAET TEH BOMB!!!1!!!!! WTF LOL FOR DA DRIL TEM THAY SAL3CT HARY STMPER AND HIS CRAW TAHT INCLUDES 2UGH GUY-SOFTEI BAR BRILIANT SMART-AS ROKHOUND AJ!1!1!1 DA OVEREAEGR FIANCE OF HIS INDEP3NDENT DAUGHT3R AND SPACY OSCAR !1!!11!11 OMG WTF LOL ITS A RAEC AGANEST TIEM 2 G3T TEH DRIL3RS TRANEED LAND THAM ON TEH ASTEROID AND GAT DA HOL3 DRILED BFORE EARTH SI DESTROYED!11!! OMG LOL!!!!11 OMG WTF

3. SOMETIEM IN DA FUTURA TEH POLAR IEC CAPS HAEV MALT3D AND DA WORLDS OC3ANS AND SAAS HAEV COVERED DA LAND!!!11!11 WTF P3OPLA R FEW AND FAR BTWEN LIVNG IN SMAL COMUNITEIS AT SEA OR SALENG FROM ONE 2 ANOTHAR AS TRAEDRS!!!!11 OMG WTF LOL AL TEH P3OPLE SEK DRY LAND.!!!1111!11 OMG WTF LOL SOMATHNG NOBODY HAS SEN!111! OMG LOL

4. DA S2RY BGINS AS DON DA HAAD OF A NU YORK MAFIA FMILEY OVERSES HIS DAUGHTARS WEDNG!!!111 LOL HIS BLOVED SON MICHAAL HAS JUST COM3 HOMA FROM TEH WAR BUT DOAS NOT INTEND 2 BCOMA PART OF HIS FATHERS BUSIENS!111!!11! WTF LOL THROUGH MICHA3LS LIEF TEH NATUR3 OF TEH FMILEY BUSIENS BCOMES CL3AR!!11!11 WTF LOL TEH BUSIENS OF DA FMILEY SI JUST LIEK TEH HEAD OF TEH FMILEY KIND AND BNEVOLANT 2 THOSA WHO GIEV RESP3CT BUT GIEVN 2 RUTHLAS VIOLENCE WHEN3VER ANYTHNG STANDS AGANEST TEH GOD OF DA FMILEY!11!!1 DON VI2 LIEVS HIS LIEF IN TEH WAY OF TEH OLD COUNTRY BUT TIEMS R CHANGNG AND SOME DONT WANT 2 FOLOW TEH OLD WAYS AND LOK OUT FOR COMUNITY AND FMILEY!!!!!!!1 LOL AN UP AND COMNG RIVAL OF TEH CORLAON3 FMILEY WANTS 2 START SELNG DRUGS IN NU YORK AND NEDS TEH DONS INFLU3NCE 2 FURTHER HIS PLAN!!!!11!! OMG WTF LOL TEH CLASH OF TEH DONS FADNG OLD WORLD VALUES AND TEH NU WAYS WIL DEMAND A TARIBLA PRIEC ESPACIALY FROM MICHAEL AL FOR DA SAEK OF TEH FMILEY

5. TEH YEAR SI 1985 AND MARTY SI UR 3VARYDAY TENAEGR 3XC3PT FOR ON3 PROBL3M!1!!1! OMG WTF H3 SI STUK IN 195!!1!11 AFTER HIS GOD FREIND SI GUN3D DOWN MARTY ENDS UP SANDNG HIS TIEM MACHIEN BAK THIRTY YEARS IN2 TEH PAST!111! NOW HA MUST FIND DOC BROWN AND CONVINCA HIM TAHT HA SI FROM TEH FUTURE IN ORD3R FOR TEH DOC 2 SAND HIM BAK 2 DA FUTURE BUT THES SI DA LEAST OF MARTYS PROBLEMS!111! OMG WTF AFTER ACIEDNTALY G3TNG IN TEH WAY OF TEH IMPORTANT METNG BTWEN HIS FUTURA MOTHER AND FATH3R MARTY MUST GET TH3M BAK 2G3THAR BFORA HE CHANGES TIEM FOREV3R AND DASTROYS HIS OWN EXIST3NC3!!!!!1! OMG WTF LOL

46 comments

Skip to comment entry

  1.  

    1.Cloverfield
    2.Armageddon
    3. Waterworld?
    4. The Godfather
    5.Back to the Future

    Comments by Amanda

    comment by Amanda Friday, February 1, 2008 @ 12:06 am

     

  2.  

    Sadly, I'm a part of that generation, so I know that this is:

    1. Cloverfield
    2. Armageddon
    3. Waterworld
    4. The Godfather
    5. Back to the Future

    This why I don't talk to over half the people in my school. I swear kids today, I can't stand most of them.

    Comments by Kylah

    comment by Kylah Friday, February 1, 2008 @ 12:15 am

     

  3.  

    fuck. no point guessing if they already have it right.

    Dammit. I miss all the fun.

    Comments by bluepaintred

    comment by bluepaintred Friday, February 1, 2008 @ 12:31 am

     

  4.  

    fuck, my head hurts after reading those.
    don't do that again!
    xoxo

    Comments by hellohahanarf

    comment by hellohahanarf Friday, February 1, 2008 @ 12:41 am

     

  5.  

    What Empanada said. She is smaht. P heartbeat

    Comments by Poppy

    comment by Poppy Friday, February 1, 2008 @ 12:49 am

     

  6.  

    What Empanada said. She is smaht.

    Comments by Poppy

    comment by Poppy Friday, February 1, 2008 @ 1:00 am

     

  7.  

    yep... they got them I'm pretty sure

    Comments by Tori

    comment by Tori Friday, February 1, 2008 @ 1:22 am

     

  8.  

    1. The Princess Diaries
    2. Cinderella
    3. Legally Blonde
    4. Barbie's Magical Kingdom
    5. Shrek the Third

    Comments by Karen Sugarpants

    comment by Karen Sugarpants Friday, February 1, 2008 @ 1:35 am

     

  9.  

    That is hilarious. I think Waterworld could have been a hit if they had advertised it that way.

    Comments by Neil

    comment by Neil Friday, February 1, 2008 @ 1:58 am

     

  10.  

    What do I win if I get it right?

    Comments by Aunt Robin

    comment by Aunt Robin Friday, February 1, 2008 @ 5:09 am

     

  11.  

    Clearly my desire to sleep real hours is ruining my chances at this game. So... what the first two commenters said.

    Comments by kapgar

    comment by kapgar Friday, February 1, 2008 @ 7:09 am

     

  12.  

    I am disappointed how well I could read this.

    We should watch the Godfather today. Am I the only one who gets Godfather cravings?

    Comments by Miss Britt

    comment by Miss Britt Friday, February 1, 2008 @ 7:10 am

     

  13.  

    1) CLOV3RFEILD
    2) ARMAEGDON
    3) W8RWORLD
    4) TEH GODFATH3R
    5) BAK 2 DA FUTURA
    HOWS TAHT FOR KNOWNG DA AOL SPAAK
    ??!!?!! OMG LOL

    Comments by NYCWD

    comment by NYCWD Friday, February 1, 2008 @ 7:24 am

     

  14.  

    Cloverfield, Armagedon, Water World, The Godfather and Back To The Future. Dawg stole my answers. (Although I had to ask my husband about one of them.)

    Comments by Angel

    comment by Angel Friday, February 1, 2008 @ 7:53 am

     

  15.  

    Amanda, shit. Maybe next time I should run it through the AOLer and then translate it into Spanish, German, then English.

    Kylah, thank Jeebus you don't talk like that.

    BPR, I figured it might take a little longer than the first 15 minutes the post is up.

    Hello, yeah, this might be too hard to read for those of you "older" folks.

    Poppy, empanada?

    Tori, yeah. Sigh.

    Karen, you got it! How'd you know?

    Neil, I know I would have been more interested in it.

    Aunt Robin, a picture of my testicles.

    Kapgar, I think I'm going to hear that all day long now.

    Britt, part II was on TV the other night. Such a great flick.

    NYCWD OMG WTF!!11!!

    Angel, which one did you have to ask him about?

    Comments by Avitable

    comment by Avitable Friday, February 1, 2008 @ 7:54 am

     

  16.  

    Holy mother of fuck, my head is on fire now and my eyes are bleeding.

    Comments by Mr. Fabulous

    comment by Mr. Fabulous Friday, February 1, 2008 @ 8:21 am

     

  17.  

    1. Cloverfield
    2. Armageddon
    3. Waterworld
    4. Godfather
    5. Back to the Future

    Man, fucked up.

    Comments by Coal Miner's Granddaughter

    comment by Coal Miner's Granddaughter Friday, February 1, 2008 @ 8:22 am

     

  18.  

    I call Amanda Empanada with her consent. (I wrote her name as Amanada once and a new nickname was born from it.)

    Comments by Poppy

    comment by Poppy Friday, February 1, 2008 @ 8:28 am

     

  19.  

    Empanada is what I call Amanda. I once wrote her name as "Amanada" by mistake once and a new nickname was born.

    Comments by Poppy

    comment by Poppy Friday, February 1, 2008 @ 8:30 am

     

  20.  

    ... once. once once. And... um, once.

    Comments by Poppy

    comment by Poppy Friday, February 1, 2008 @ 8:30 am

     

  21.  

    1. Cloverfield

    2. Armaggedon

    3. The Day After Tomorrow

    4. The Godfather

    5. Back to the Future

    I rock~ sexytime

    Comments by Robin

    comment by Robin Friday, February 1, 2008 @ 8:42 am

     

  22.  

    Mr. Fabulous, you're too old to read this shit.

    Heather, OMG TOTALY11!!ONE

    Poppy, I shall call her Chimichanga from now on.

    Robin, you got #3 wrong!

    Comments by Avitable

    comment by Avitable Friday, February 1, 2008 @ 8:45 am

     

  23.  

    Mmmmmmm, Chimichanga... I think she'll like that, actually.

    Comments by Poppy

    comment by Poppy Friday, February 1, 2008 @ 8:50 am

     

  24.  

    You've just crushed my dreams of going on a game show like this someday.

    Comments by Robin

    comment by Robin Friday, February 1, 2008 @ 8:51 am

     

  25.  

    I think Waterworld works better taking NetFlix's description and Japanesing it via Altavista's Babelfish translator:

    The planet of the terrestrial liquid which can do the polar cap ice in the world of the Futurism which dissolved, (Jeanne Tripplehorn) as for the beautiful hostess to rescue the sailor of the mutation body from the jail of the floating atoll, (cabin Costner). Those escape, fullness and Enola where she is young (Tina Majorino) and also with from that trimaran navigate separated. But the torio the menace pirate who directly desires tattooed map "dry area" in the back section of Enola (Dennis's hopper) becomes the target.

    That's right - fear Dennis's hopper. I don't know what it is, and I don't want to know.

    Comments by Grant

    comment by Grant Friday, February 1, 2008 @ 9:54 am

     

  26.  

    Wow, even I got these and I am old!! boobs3

    Comments by trishk

    comment by trishk Friday, February 1, 2008 @ 10:04 am

     

  27.  

    Well dayum.

    Next time I will have to NOT read everyone's answers.

    Comments by themuttprincess

    comment by themuttprincess Friday, February 1, 2008 @ 10:21 am

     

  28.  

    I'm always late to the party too ... but I'm giggling at Karen.
    lmao

    Comments by J.

    comment by J. Friday, February 1, 2008 @ 10:28 am

     

  29.  

    What is Cloverfield? Is is worth watching? Is there nudity?

    Comments by Y2K Survivor

    comment by Y2K Survivor Friday, February 1, 2008 @ 10:53 am

     

  30.  

    1. Don't know
    2. Armageddon
    3. Waterworld
    4. The Godfather
    5. Back to the future.
    and I didn't peek at others.

    Comments by The Absurdist

    comment by The Absurdist Friday, February 1, 2008 @ 11:22 am

     

  31.  

    LMAO @ Karen's answers!!

    These were kind of easy actually because the mind tends to see what should be there.

    BTW–there's an addendum to my post today;-)

    Comments by turnbaby

    comment by turnbaby Friday, February 1, 2008 @ 11:31 am

     

  32.  

    They say imitation is the best form of flattery. Then again they said I wouldn’t be able to eat my own weight in marshmallows too, so what the hell do they know.

    Comments by Dan

    comment by Dan Friday, February 1, 2008 @ 12:01 pm

     

  33.  

    I am confused. When did you decide to start doing posts in anything other than English?

    Comments by Amy

    comment by Amy Friday, February 1, 2008 @ 12:04 pm

     

  34.  

    I love Mexican food!

    Comments by Amanda

    comment by Amanda Friday, February 1, 2008 @ 12:34 pm

     

  35.  

    can't read.
    sick.
    dying.
    mucous and phlegm filled head won't compute this crap.

    send soup/drugs/Malibu Rum.

    Seacrest out. crying

    Comments by Stephanie

    comment by Stephanie Friday, February 1, 2008 @ 12:50 pm

     

  36.  

    Cloverfield (easy one)
    Armegeddon (can't spell)
    Waterworld (maybe)
    No idea (none)
    Back to the Future (aww the memories)

    Comments by Cheri

    comment by Cheri Friday, February 1, 2008 @ 3:22 pm

     

  37.  

    Damn. You will have to warn me when you do one of these again so that I can sit and hit refresh at midnight so that I can answer first. I got them all.

    Comments by Shelli

    comment by Shelli Friday, February 1, 2008 @ 4:08 pm

     

  38.  

    I am seriously scared that I could understand that shiite.
    And Britt - you are not the only one who gets the Godfather cravings!!!
    OMG WTF LOL!

    Comments by Sybil Law

    comment by Sybil Law Friday, February 1, 2008 @ 5:22 pm

     

  39.  

    You of all people could have picked at least a few challenging movies.
    The Japanese translator is fun while the AOL version is just annoying.

    I hate this post.
    I most certainly do NOT want to stick my balls in it.

    Comments by Clown

    comment by Clown Friday, February 1, 2008 @ 5:53 pm

     

  40.  

    Teh furst won is ckkdkdpreprkfk dkdpor0r dkdoro.

    Comments by BOSSY

    comment by BOSSY Friday, February 1, 2008 @ 7:55 pm

     

  41.  

    cloverfield
    Armageddon
    Waterworld (very sure)
    The Godfather
    Back to the Future!!!

    So when can I expect my prize???

    Comments by the_boy_blunder

    comment by the_boy_blunder Saturday, February 2, 2008 @ 4:22 am

     

  42.  

    kay numb3r 1 1s cl()v3rf13ld ... 1 st()pp3d w1t d4 r3st cuz 1t hurt my 3y3s

    Comments by Amanda

    comment by Amanda Saturday, February 2, 2008 @ 2:52 pm

     

  43.  

    I think I might do this but with Jive. The Dialectizer does Jive translations mighty fine.

    I'll have to find a way to make it uniquely Waynerized so I don't get charged with Grand Theft Bloggo.

    Comments by Wayne

    comment by Wayne Saturday, February 2, 2008 @ 8:27 pm

     

  44.  

    Poppy, as long as she's okay with me putting "sour cream" on her.

    Robin, that's probably best that you hear it now.

    Grant, ooh, nice one.

    TrishK, I know! Do you have a Betamax player?

    TMP, next time I'll make it harder.

    J, yeah, she got them all right, too!

    Y2K, it's worth watching for some people. Might be a little too "in your face" for you.

    Absurdist, #1 is Cloverfield.

    Turnbaby, yeah - next time I'll just make the details harder.

    Dan, but can you eat my weight in marshmallows?

    Amy, OMG LIEK UR A N00B!!!ONELOL

    Amanda, but do you love being called Mexican food?

    Stephanie, I know how you feel - I'm the same way. Dammit - you got me sick!

    Cheri, you didn't know The Godfather?

    Shelli, suuuuure you did.

    Sybil, ROTFLMAO.

    Clown, how about dipping your balls in it?

    Bossy, you are TEH WINNARZ!!!

    Boy Blunder, it's in the mail.

    Wayne, I'll let you slide this time. Since I stole it, too.

    Comments by Avitable

    comment by Avitable Sunday, February 3, 2008 @ 7:58 pm

     

  45.  

    Jesus, that reads like the comments from the asshat kids on my Green Day hating post.

    Comments by kapgar

    comment by kapgar Friday, February 8, 2008 @ 11:58 am

     

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