Routine Jabberwocky

On my Ini "TY"al days...

noreply@blogger.com (Titan) — Sun, 31 May 2009 01:23:00 +0000

English is not my mother tongue.My English
vocabulary grows as and when I hear new words
all the time,right from my childhood.The below
incident took place when I was in class V (CIRCA 1990).

I hail from AECS (Atomic Energy Central School)
from kalpakkam,Tamil Nadu,INDIA.The school is
situated on the coast of Bay of Bengal.
When classes got bored I used to gaze at the bay.
(No babes at the bay, even if it had,
I was not in that age).

It was a mathematics class, Eighth period on a
Saturday(C.B.S.E schools works on saturday as well).
We were all geared up as it was the last period
of the week.As usual the maths teacher came and
taught some algebraic expressions.She asked
Shiva (The first bencher)to read a problem in the
text book, so that she can explain.

Maths Teacher (MT): Shiva can you read the
problem in Exercize 5.1?
Shiva : yes madam..

"Raju had some amount of money with him.
He spent 5 Rs on buying sugar
candy , gave 7 Rs to his sister suja and
remaining he gave it to his mom.
If the amount of money he gave to his
mom was 2 Rs, How much money
did Raju have ini'TEE"aly"?.

MT : What?..read the last sentence again?
Shiva : Sure .."If the amount of money he gives to his
mom is 2 Rs,How much money did Raju have ini'TEEEE"aly?.

The Maths Teacher with a grin face,asked subbu to read the last sentence

Subbu : "How much money did Raju have ini"TEEE"aly?

The Maths Teacher got vexed and narrowed down .
the question to the class.How do you call the word
which has the spelling " I,N,I,T,I,A,L".

(Now only we all got that something is wrong in
pronouncing the last word.Maths teacher was picking on persons
because volunteership was always missing in my class.
Unless one was put on spot,she would'nt get the answer).

MT: Krishna , can you pronounce the word?
Krishna : in"I"teal (happily)

MT could not control her anger and shouted at me.

Raj??? can you??
Raj: Sure!! ini"TY"al.

My maths teacher really got irritated, slashed me left and right in
her bamboo stick.She asked the entire class if anybody knows the
answer. There was a pin drop silence.

The fed up teacher commanded the entire class to kneeldown.
We all knelt down.Then she called Shiva(The first bencher)and
asked "What's your full name?"

Shiva: K.shiva Rama Krishnan.
MT : what is the first letter of your name called?
Shiva: S

MT got angry and said idiot, the single letter before your actual name

Shiva: K
MT : sssss..Whats that called?.
Shiva: in a shouting voice "KAYY".

The teacher got still more fed up and gave him
left and right with her bamboo cane.
I was very much relaxed (even smiled within myself)
at this time as I was not the only one
getting slashed by the cane.

Now, the poor teacher puts the question in a
different way to Subbu (M.Subramaniam).
Whats your inishal?.
Subbu hurriedly said "M".So whats "M"??.
Subbu in a low key said inishal.

MT : Hmmm...loudly
Subbu : 'INISHAL" (Shouting)
MT : Thats what I was trying to hear from you all..you geesy fools..

Everyone saw each others face.I was hitting my forehead with my palm"..cha..this is it"..hmm

By this time, the school Bell rang.We were seeing each other and also starring at the teacher now and then for any signal to go.But no signal from the teacher.After 5 minutes, She looked at her watch.She asked everyone to write the word "INITIAL" 500 times and show to her tomorrow and dispersed the class.

(Note: Similarly , I thought the word kneel down was a single word initially.We used to say "he/she is not kneeldowning madam"..I came to know kneel and down are seperate words,very much later.It was not our fault then.It was the way we were brought up..rather I was brought up.I think the education system is lot better now)

Cursing the Cursor

noreply@blogger.com (Titan) — Fri, 17 Apr 2009 20:41:00 +0000

Always I had the frightening feeling within myself that I did'nt know anything about computers. My dread was to an extent that I used to get nightmares on that idiot box.

Having come from a First Group Biology Background in my higher secondary, I was blindfolded to computers. When people say some computer jargons, I tend to stay away from them. My computer illiteracy was so famous in my college, whenever my friends come across any jargons or any tech stories they tend to turn and look at me. I felt awkward when they did so

It was my first day on computer lab. No wonder I was sweating my palms and face when I heard the first task. It was a basic FORTAN LAB. We had the code written in the theory class. We just need to write it on the computer and execute it .There were not many computers for all. So each computer is occupied by 2 people. I was the odd man out and I ended up in using without sharing. Someone switched on my monitor, someone switched on the CPU and some one navigated to the portion where we write the code.

I was busy typing the code and got stuck up with something (I guess I needed some compilation help) .so I called my computer lab instructor to help me out .He asked all my other class mates to come to my place so that he can demonstrate to everybody using my computer. I called everyone and asked them to assemble at my place. I was typing some changes to code and came to an end of the line. At that time, the instructor asked me to “MOVE THE CURSOR” .All of my friends knew that I did not know that word .So they kept quite. I was so frightened and was sweating a lot

The instructor again said “MOVE THE CURSOR” .Not knowing what to do, I just looked at my friends assembled near my place for some clues .Everyone was keeping mum in a planned manner and was giggling.

Again the instructor frightened me in his rough voice “MOVE THE CURSOR”. As soon as I heard his voice I moved the MONITOR hastily (just gave a shake).All my friends giggle busted in to an uproarious howling. The tumult was so louder that the neighboring classes also came to our class thinking something fishy had happened.The cursor was the first computer jargon to get my CURSE

************
For people who don’t know what’s cursor?
Cursor stands for [CURrent Screen Oriented Region]. It is a moving placement or pointer that indicates a position in a computer

Pleadings ..

noreply@blogger.com (Titan) — Tue, 28 Oct 2008 17:35:00 +0000

Enough is Enough .Please, let us put an end to this.
Enough to all the mouth to mouth french kisses we had
Im fed up with that terrible stink.Please...Please..
Please brush your teeth and then,have me on your hand.
I will be more than happy to be on your hand and
empty myself on your mouth.

Please!!! Please!!! Please!!!

--Routine Morning pleadings of my Coffee cup!!

Watery Wheel ;-)

noreply@blogger.com (Titan) — Thu, 23 Oct 2008 23:58:00 +0000

I along with my friends went to a Theme Park called Valley Fair in mineapolis two years back.We were very much interested in trying some new rides as we were sick of Giant Wheel type of rides.There was a amusing Giant Wheel ride.It has a Giant wheel in between and two poles on the sides of the giant wheel splashing water.The Giant wheel was so huge and rotates in all the possible directions which we havent seen anywhere .The water splashes at regular intervals on the wheel making everyone wet.It's really a nerve-breaking ride.

Vj, one of my roommates got fascinated by the ride and made an attempt.I,scared by the force the Giant wheel rotated , stayed in my place watching others enjoying their ride.After going through that Awesome drive, Vj came down wet with a tensed outlook.I was appreciating him saying that

"you are great.I would have peed if I were in the ride".

Not affected by any argument he said in a normal tone
"For that matter no one did anything different.The sprinkler tank got empty before the ride itself".

I was asking him then "how come you are wet?"
He yelled at me saying "Thats what I said no one did anything different than what you would have done"
After that only I could get the reason for the massive stinck in that place

Even you too??.

noreply@blogger.com (Titan) — Thu, 04 Sep 2008 03:06:00 +0000

Family Planning campaign was
at its peak at that time.
Buses, Lorries, TV's , Radio's
everywhere the inverted triangle was lustering.
It was at this time I along with my family went
to our hometown to my uncle's house to spend the vacation

My uncle was a funny person trying to make wit out of everything.
I was with him all the time watching his mimics and rib-tickling
comedies.He had a big field of coconut trees which bears loads
of coconuts every year.

When I and my uncle came across a coconut tree.The person hired
for coconut plucking was narrating to my uncle that this particular
was not bearing more than two coconuts a year..
My uncle with a giggle looked at the tree and asked
'hey coconut tree ...you too did family planning??

There was a wave of laughter all around after that...

Where's his Share???.

noreply@blogger.com (Titan) — Sun, 24 Aug 2008 05:27:00 +0000

I stay in a condominim in cedar rapids with one of my friends.We were asked to move out of the condominum on June 11th due to the deluge of the cedar river which passes nearby.On hearing the flood warnings my friend carrying his office laptop, fled to chicago to stay with his wife .

I , not knowing where to go was stumbling.After an ordeal of two months taking refuge in hotels, freinds house and othe apartments , I managed to come back to my apartment now.

My friend came back after a month after I started living in the apartment,when everything got settled.We were in feud on sharing the rent for the month which my friend was not in the apartment.I barked him to pay the rent but he balked.He smashed the door and left the place.

Having fully drunken he came back at night and went to bed without uttering a word to me. I was in sound sleep .I woke up when I heard a tumbling sound in the restroom. When I ran there I found my room mate stumbling in rest room.

Hey!! what happened ? what happened ? I asked him.He was as groggy as some one affected in a accident.I saw a tiny creaky creature sneaking very fast under the coutch.

I yelled at him hey it is rat!!.rat!! rat!!. As soon as I yelled..

He retorted "Hey why did you leave him???..stop that little creeky culprit..Dont leave him unless HE GIVE HIS SHARE OF THE RENT.

As soon as I heard this my mind went ?%@#$%

Winning Boredom

noreply@blogger.com (Titan) — Tue, 15 Jan 2008 20:27:00 +0000

It was no less than the battle of panipat,
no less than the american war of independence,
no less than the historic hundred years war
which I'm waging against my boredom.

I was a busy worker bee since I joined
my first job back in 2002.I was working
day and night, hardly had chance thinking
off the track from work. Start by 10 in
the morning and end by 10 in the night even
extends up to next day morning at times.

Having worked like that for about 4 years,
imagine how it would be for a person
to sit idle having nothing to work upon.
All I’m doing at work is sitting
before the monitor and chatting with
the so called managers begging for some work
and at times others to accompany
me for lunch or coffee.

I was trying out different ways to get on to do
something which I can do in my work.
I went on to play around excel and found
some tips ..but that too not for long , two
to three days may be. then tried for some
certifications.. that also got my nerve after some time.
It takes around 1 hour for coffee and more than
2 hours for my lunch

Whoever I meet, whoever I talk I was whining
about my job. While disclosing my tears
to one of my friend I came to know about this
blog writing, which I can do even at my work.
Im gathering ideas at my work for my blog which is
making me busy at work.

Finally I get the feeling that I have won my war
against boredom with my keypad. I thank blogspot and
my friend GURU for giving me this idea which
I have never thought about .

City of 5 Seasons

noreply@blogger.com (Titan) — Fri, 11 Jan 2008 16:16:00 +0000

City of pearls, city of angels, city of rocks....have you ever heard of city of 5 seasons?

That’s the place where I live now, its Cedar Rapids, Iowa.

When I first entered this city, I came across many hotels, restaurants, parkades named as 5 seasons parking, 5 seasons restaurant and so on. Hearing parkade, don’t get tensed. Parking building is called parkade here. I just thought that it means some caption or whatever. When I was chatting with the parkade employee, he said it’s the city's caption.

I pounded him with questions. Later came to know that he didn’t know .Then I asked my colleague who always was proud in saying that she stayed in the city longer than my life .she responded that she also didn’t know. She said that she stayed here for a longer time but that not necessarily means that she should know everything

I was asking this question whomever I came across, my colleagues, policemen, bouncers, picketers, ticketers...tresspassers…..etc.. No answer.

I forgot that we all have a great masterpiece of internet.Googled it
and found the answer..Normally we have 4 seasons in US.
They are Spring, summer, Fall and Winter.
City of 5 seasons have another season called 'season of Joy' which doesn’t have
any span of time but it’s integrated in all the seasons.
The concept of the caption is something weird and different.

Anyway I like it though because of its uniqueness

noreply@blogger.com (Titan) — Thu, 10 Jan 2008 23:01:00 +0000

It was a fine cool sunny day of summer in Cedar Rapids, Iowa.
I moved to this lovely happening place just a month ago.
As most other places in US, it was hard to survive here without a car.
Hurriedly I was hunting all the car showrooms and managed to get one.

With the company of my room mate planned to roam around the city
to enjoy its serenity and flair .
Before coming to Cedar Rapids.I was little bit reluctant about the place as
its name was not out anywhere, being in a low profile.
We ogled the taller buildings with a big sigh and didn’t forget to take pictures of those.The bridges are one of the cities architectural splendors. The four
bridges which traverses the Cedar River is an awesome sight for the new comers like us

We stopped the car in the bridge and just roamed along the banks with our shank's mare
We spotted gorgeous looking women, hooking up the needle of the fishing rod.
We were hooked up by her not by her fishing rod but her eyes.
While we were gazing around the area, a police car pulled over near my car.

Two policemen got down of the car and were eagle-eying my car.

There was no registration at that time, since I got it newly.

I went near them thinking I have made a terrible mistake.

My heart was beating as fast as Armstrong’s when he landed on the moon.

Many events were showing off and on my mind like a flickering bulb

'Did I stop when the red light is on'?

'Didn’t I give right of way to the other car?’

'Did I speed too much?'

While the above questions were sprouting on my mind, I heard an amicable voice.

Hey gentlemen how r you?

I replied in a casual manner, we are fine thank you. and you?

Fine thanks. Is this your car? asked the policemen

I gave a stammering reply, 'yes...Sss'. May I know if there's a problem.

One of the policemen left as we came.

We got a call from some one saying that 'there were two strangers taking the photograph of the many building and monuments of the city' replied the policeman

I was relieved little bit and it gave me some air to breathe as I didn’t make any traffic violation. Before he asked the other question, I handed over my driving license, camera, opened my car and showed all my vehicle documents. He called someone in his office and verified my driver license and associated details.

He just glanced the photo's in my camera and said 'your snaps look harmonious'

The policeman replied' I feel sorry for whatever happened, Gentlemen.

The places you were taking photograph were the prison, city hall, ancient government building, court and the cities tallest building. Since its vicinity to all the major buildings,

I was asked to interrogate you.’ Sorry for all the incidents' pleaded the police man

He gave a clear explanation of all the buildings, the festival, events and all

other adjoining places. I was thinking in my mind, had he come earlier we would have got an awesome guide of the city