It’s sad how long it takes me to figure out technology and computers. That part of podcasting is just not my gift, but thankfully some of my kids are great at it and they finally helped me figure it all out. My daughter Patience was the most help, she’s amazing! (if you don’t follow her on Instagram you really should). Her first name proved to be necessary while dealing with teaching me how to do this and she made my little podcast intro and really carried me along at first. I hate to tell you how many times she had to keep herself from laughing when I couldn’t figure out how to do something simple, like move a file or hit record.

If you have been around my blog for a while you know that I have had struggles with my relationships with a few of my adult children. It’s been a long, difficult road and learning to navigate the challenges has been a growing experience for me. I get so many messages and emails from other moms who have recently faced really difficult situations with their older kids and I know their pain.

It is heart-breaking when the people you love the most in the world reject you. There are so many emotions and so much confusion that it is hard to know where to turn. And no one talks about it, especially Christians. We tend to think we have to look perfect or have no problems and when we are shattered we don’t know what to do.

I have been there. And for many years now I have felt I should talk about it, open the doors to this secret issue of being hurt by your kids. But how do you do that without damaging those relationships even more? It’s a delicate balance for sure! Those are still, and will always be, my most precious and treasured relationships. Even if they reject me, I will not reject them. Not because I am so great, but because it’s how God made me….as a mom….to never let go.

But theres a difference between not letting go of my love for them, and letting go of their opinions of me. I can, with God’s help, let that go. I don’t have to drag around being unhappy because of hard issues with my grown kids. I can actually still have joy and peace and victory despite the challenges. And you can too!

That’s what I am sharing in the podcast called, Radiance. It’s all about finding freedom in the midst of the hard times. I hope you’ll be blessed by it.

First, the part of the challenge that EVERYONE says is the most daunting when you’re deciding if you want to try it…doing two workouts a day. I worried about this too when I was deciding if I wanted to do it. But I knew that I got to define what a workout is, so for me it was keeping myself moving at a faster pace than normal for 45 minutes. That means I wasn’t killing myself on these workouts, but just getting moving. I got a recumbent bike which made it easy to figure my indoor workouts. I’d do that first thing every morning. For my second workout, James and I would do that one together (he also did the challenge). In the beginning we got in the pool and paced around it. Once it got too cold for that we would go for a 45 minute walk each afternoon.

I do travel frequently so I had to get creative with the workouts when I wasn’t at home. I would wake up each morning and plan my two workouts for the day so I didn’t get stuck at night exhausted and having to exercise (which did happen a few times because of my schedule). For my outdoor workout I would keep my eye out for opportunities to go for a brisk walk. One day I walked around a path at a rest stop, another day I paced at an outdoor shopping mall. One day I walked around an empty parking lot while my kids were at a museum. Just this week I went to the flea market and after I was finished shopping I took my purchases to the car then went back out and did my walk around the market. I did a few workouts in the rain and, while I wouldn’t choose it, I appreciated the adventure. During most of my outdoor travel workouts I listened to podcasts, which was an added bonus. For my indoor workout (they could both be outdoor if I wanted, but I’d generally do one inside and one outside) sometimes I had to get creative. If I was in a hotel that didn’t have a fitness center I would turn on a 45 minute show and do stretches and lift water bottles and jog in place. Of course if I had access to a fitness center I would use that. Really it was about prioritizing movement and I am thankful that I have proved to myself that there’s no good excuse not to do it.

The second part that I found the hardest was drinking a gallon of water each day. Well, maybe hard isn’t the right word. I found it unpleasant. I generally add electrolytes to my water and I feel that’s important for my health, but with his challenge you can’t add anything to the water. I am a water drinker, but don’t think that a gallon of water with no electrolytes added is necessarily the best for my health. So my heart wasn’t really in it and I didn’t like having to measure all of my water. But I did it! I was determined to do it exactly the way it was laid out in the challenge. I got myself this 40oz water bottle and I filled it three times per day plus I drank 10 additional ounces so that I would go over the gallon I was required to drink each day. I generally drank the 10oz first thing in the morning when I took my supplements so all I had left was the 3 – 40oz bottles. There was something about telling myself, ”I only have to drink 3 of these” that made it easier. It really is all about how you talk to yourself!

Third, the diet. This part didn’t concern me because I had already made huge changes to my eating a year before. I had lost 60# eating what I call ”keto-vore” (mostly carnivore with a few exceptions) when I started. So I decided to just tighten that up for the 75 Hard. I took nuts completely out (I knew I had been eating too many of them and was happy for the motivation to stop), I dropped my total carb goal to 20 per day and I went deeper into the carnivore diet, sticking to mostly meat based products. In other words, I ate a lot of meat, eggs and a little cheese. I did allow the occasional avocado and my favorite ”Hawaiian Rolls” that are made with mostly egg whites, but basically I stuck very close to carnivore and ate about 5-6 carbs per day. Only twice did I get anywhere near the 20 carbs per day that I was officially allowing myself. I shared a lot of my meals on my Instagram stories, if you want to know more about that.

Each morning I would use an app to log what I planned to eat that day. Sometimes the plans would change, but planning early really helped me to know where I had wiggle room and not obsess about it the rest of the day. Once I logged my plans I would just relax about it.

I am really happy with this eating lifestyle. I generally fast until around after 2:00 then I eat a small snack like a couple of eggs and some bacon. Then around 6:00 I eat a nice, big meal and I’m done for the day. I don’t feel hungry or deprived. I love the foods I am eating and I feel great. So I don’t plan to make any huge changes in my diet after the challenge is over, except I will let myself have some nuts again (they are mostly great for when I am traveling) and I may stop logging all of my food, although honestly that was very helpful.

Fourth, the reading. I actually looked forward to this part. I had a stack of books waiting to be read so I pulled a few off the shelf plus I ordered a couple of new ones and I borrowed another one. Each day I would sit down with my book and immediately move the book mark ahead 10 pages. If I was in a hurry that day I would stop at the 10 pages, but I often would read further. I’m not quite finished with the last book, but now that I can see how nice it is to slowly read a book, ingesting it in small chunks, I do think I will keep this up. There were a few nights when I was traveling that I would get to the end of the day and not have done my reading. I learned very quickly that it was a mistake to lie in bed and try to read. I learned this because I would be jolted awake by the book hitting me in the face after falling asleep trying to read. So I would sit up and make myself focus until I got to the bookmark and then stop. I’m not sure how much I actually got from those nights of the reading, but I just kept going the next day.

Lastly, the progress photo. Every day you have to take a photo. This became a part of my morning routine. I would put on the same sports bra and pants, take the pic then put on a t-shirt and go do my morning workout. I see a lot of before and after photos of people who have done this challenge and they are incredible. I don’t have incredible photos. I’m not sure why, because my body has definitely changed, but you can’t really see it in the pictures. But I still took the picture every day….had to check it off the list.

One more thing that I think made it doable for me was I had two people doing it along with me. My husband was doing it, so we did those afternoon workouts together plus encouraged each other when it got hard. And one of my best girlfriends did it with me also. She was also using an exercise bike so most mornings we would chat and share our struggles, victories and goals over Marco Polo while we rode. I do think you can do it alone, but having them with me gave me so much strength!

My results? I lost 11#, making it a total of 71# lost since Oct 2021. I have more energy, better mood, more spiritual strength, really it was soooo good for me! I am thinking about doing a shorter one every year just to make sure I stay on track….maybe 30 days? I guess I’ll see how it goes.

I want to encourage anyone to do this challenge. It’s about fitness, but the main benefit is consistency and strength. Don’t let the 2 workouts scare you. Show yourself what you’re made of!

YOU CAN DO IT!!!

Follow me on Instagram to see more of what I am eating and how I’m finding ways to get exercise!

I can hardly believe it’s been a whole year since I made some major changes to my life. September 30, 2021 I had a serious moment of reflection and revelation about how I was treating my body and needed to stop. So I did.

I decided that I would change my diet. It had been a long time coming. Since the pandemic of 2020 I had lost control of my eating, gained weight and felt terrible. I was already not doing well before that, so I was in a bad place. A dear friend of mine had already been managing her eating with very low carbs and it had been on my mind. Then, as if a bolt of lightning struck, I knew it was what I needed to do. The next day I went cold turkey on the carbs. Let me tell you, it was a rough couple of weeks.

I went through what can only be described as withdrawls. “Keto flu” hit me hard. But I knew if I could make it to the other side I would be ok, and that’s exactly how it went. I hung on for dear life as I rode the waves of cravings and feeling flu-ish. But then it was over and I started to feel better. After that I went to work figuring out what to eat and who to get advice from.

One thing I did that really helped was I got a constant glucose monitor. Y’all, to see exactly what was happening inside my body as a result of what I ate meant there was nowhere to hide with my food choices. I was fascinated with what my insulin levels would do when I ate different things. It really helped direct my choices and I used a nutritionist during that time, so I had some direction from her. I only wore a device for 3 months. I don’t have diabetes and had learned a lot in that time, but I didn’t need to keep using it. I give credit to my being able to stick with the diet in the beginning to wearing that and having a friend who was doing it alongside me.

My basic eating plan is simple….eat as few carbs as possible while staying full. Also I was already dabbling with intermittent fasting so I cemented that in a little more than I had been. I generally don’t eat before 2:00 or after 7:00. That was pretty easy to get used to because I was already halfheartedly doing it. And I started following some guys who really live and teach a carnivore/VLC Keto diet. Dr Ken Berry and Dr Robert Cywes both have great YouTube channels filled with information to help you get started.

Over the summer I felt ready to take it up a notch, so in August I started doing the 75 Hard challenge. With that I took the diet a little further by really going full on carnivore with very few exceptions. And this challenge, which I am 40 days into, doesn’t allow for any cheats. That’s been a little difficult; I like to have a small something a couple of times a month. Nothing crazy or high carb or sugary, just a little treat. Like Dr Ken Berry says, “When I need a cheat on my carnivore diet I have something keto.” That is me! But the 75 Hard doesn’t allow any cheats, so I have stuck very closely to it for the past 41 days and have 34 more days to go! (if you decide to try 75 Hard you don’t have to do the diet I am doing….you choose your own eating plan).

That also means I’m doing two workouts a day and drinking a minimum of a gallon of water. Once this challenge is over I will be so happy to do one workout a day and not have to measure my water anymore. But it’s been a great boost to my health goals. While I am getting tired of it, I am planning to take it to the end. Having my husband and one of my besties doing it too really, really helps!

I tell you, it’s such a gift to be able to look back over the past year and not regret another year of not trying. I have lost 62# and have so much energy and the best part is the feeling of hope. Hope that I can take good care of my body and not feel stuck.

One thing I love about getting one part of my life in order is how it ripples out to everything else. Finances, skin care, my business, daily Bible reading, so many areas that need work but have improved from making that one change a year ago. That also gives me hope that I will keep making improvements in other areas that I want to work on.

My plan for the next year, after I finish the 75 challenge, is to keep doing simple, daily workouts. That is phase 2 of my total lifestyle overhaul. Nothing crazy, just half an hour on the bike or waking or stretches, something like that every day. And I still have weight to lose, but it’s slow now. I am content to let it happen naturally as a result of my lifestyle choices and not push to just get it over with. This is the long game.

If you’ve been wanting to make some changes in your life, why not start now?! We can celebrate your one year healthiversary together next Oct 1!

This post contains an affiliate link. That means sometimes I share about things I love and get a small percentage if you order through my site. It never costs you more money, and often (like in the case of the glucose monitor in this post) it will actually give you a small discount also!

In case you aren’t familiar, here is a recap of the challenge and the things I have to do each day. It’s harder than I expected in some ways and easier in others. But isn’t that how these things go? You really can’t know how something will hit your life until you try it.

In some ways I’ve figured out a routine with it, but let me tell you that when it’s time for that second workout I never want to do it. NEVER. I have to convince myself each time. And truthfully, I have no intention of incorporating two workouts into my life when this is over. BUT I do appreciate that I have proved to myself that I can. And having to do one of the workouts outside has been a challenge. I have already had to figure it out when traveling or if it’s raining. A few days ago it was pouring outside and I still had to do my outdoor workout. Thankfully I have a big front porch so I paced up and down that porch for 45 minutes. If I didn’t have that I guess I’d just get my umbrella and walk outside like a crazy person.

But I am already tired of it. I am ready to stop. I think that’s the real challenge though, pushing past that. Since I have determined that I want to be in the 75 Hard club I am going to have to find ways to find joy in it for another 61 days. Thats two more months. Yikes.

Also, because you may be wondering, I have not lost weight. Since last October I have lost 60 pounds, but none since July. I wasn’t sure why it was so stalled, but I assumed the 75 Hard would kick in back into gear. But so far it hasn’t. What’s interesting though is that I am definitely slimming down, despite no weight loss. My body is responding, just not in pounds. I’m trying not to get frustrated about that. I have another 35 pounds to lose to hit my goal weight. I do believe I’ll get there, it’s just a lot slower than I want (thanks hormones).

I tell you this because I want to give a very clear picture of what this challenge is like. Every day in my social media stories I share how I finished the challenge for that day. But those accomplishment posts don’t tell the whole story, like how my cravings have been intense or how my legs don’t work for an hour after I ride the bike in the morning. Or how many times I have to stop what I’m doing and rush to the bathroom because of all the water I’m drinking. This isn’t glamorous.

At this point it’s all mental, which is definitely where I need to grow. I definitely need to improve my mental and emotional strength. The creator of this challenge calls it a mental fitness challenge and I would agree. I am happy with it and planning to keep going until the end even though I don’t feel like it. And I would encourage anyone to do it. I can see that it has already made changes in me that I want to keep working on. For instance, I am more peaceful. There’s something about doing a hard thing that you know is good for you that gives a sense of peace. And, like I said, my body is making good changes and that’s encouraging. So I am going to keep pushing through.

Maybe I need to do what they say when marriage gets hard, remember why I did it in the first place and focus on that. And please don’t let me discourage you from trying it! I think this is exactly what I needed and maybe you need it too!

For 8 days I was travelling, and it was difficult to figure out what to eat, where to do both workouts (don’t forget that one of them has to be outside), and to get all of the water. Even the reading was hard. I’d be going to bed and realize I hadn’t done it and after a day of travel I struggled to stay awake even for just 10 pages. But I did it! I did every single thing every single day.

Yesterday I knew would be the hardest. I woke up in a hotel room, had about 2 hours to do everything from the workout to my morning Young Living work sessions to showering and getting packed up. Then I was going to a wedding to be the helper for one of my besties, the mom of the groom. I would need to give my full focus toward helping her for the rest of the day. Then I had a late 5.5 hour drive home. I did my first workout in the fitness center at the hotel. Check. But where would I do my second, outdoor workout?

Let me be clear that while I am calling these “workouts” that’s because that is what the challenge calls them. I am not killing myself in these. I do an easy ride on an exercise bike, or take a walk, or do a workout video then add some exercise bands to fill 45 minutes. For me it’s about getting into motion and staying in motion with intent to strengthen my body. So you might not call me going for a 45 minute walk a workout, but for me right now it is what I am doing. I do push myself a little and I expect to do it a little more as I get used to the schedule.

Anyway, I want to tell you about yesterday. I did my morning hotel workout, got my gallon of water all set up, for my eating I decided to fast a little later than usual so I didn’t have to worry about food. But how would I get that second outdoor workout in?! I couldn’t figure it out so I would ask God to give me direction and show me. I would keep my eyes open for the opportunity and if nothing came up I would walk around in my yard late at night after I got home.

Then it started to rain at home. And rain and rain and rain. I knew I wouldn’t be able to walk around in the dark in the pouring rain. I thought maybe I would do stretches and weights on my front porch. It would be 10:00 at night in the rain after a really long day, which didn’t sound fun but if it was what I had to do I would do it.

I was also looking for ways to do it while I was on the road. I knew I would stop at Bucees, maybe I could walk around the parking lot there. But no, it was raining there when I got there with no end in sight. Ok, maybe I could find another quick stop to march around, but the rain wouldn’t stop. So I kept driving.

Then it happened. I pulled in to a rest area to use the bathroom and the rain had just stopped. It looked like it would start again any minute, but it was a nice break (driving in the rain always makes me tense). As I was walking back out to my car I saw a bench across the parking lot and what looked like a little trail behind it. I walked over and sure enough….there was a little nature trail at the rest area and it wasn’t raining! This was it!

But I wasn’t sure if it would be safe for me to walk around on a trail that was surrounded by trees right off the highway by myself. It would be very easy to attack someone there! Just as I was wondering if I should do it a car with 4 women pulled up and they were getting out and taking their dinner over to one of the picnic tables. I walked over and told them my situation and asked them how long they would be there. They said at least half an hour because they needed a break from their driving. So I asked if I could give them my phone number then would they text me if anyone else went down the trail, so I could be safe. They said they would be happy to!

So off I went! I ended up going around the trail several times to get my 45 minutes in and each time I passed the women they would smile and wave and cheer me on. That was sweet! Thankfully, no one else ever went on the trail (I am betting it’s not often used) and about 30 minutes into my walk they texted to tell me they were leaving. I really appreciated them!

As soon as my 45 minutes were up I hightailed it to my car and I was back on the road. And just then it started to rain again. I felt like God did that just for me, made the rain stop for 45 minutes so I could do my nature trail walk. And that walk definitely gave me a renewed energy to stay awake for the rest of the drive home. I was so thankful for that.

I couldn’t help thinking while I was walking on that quiet trail about how this decision to do this challenge had me there, in a place I would never, and I mean NEVER, have gone otherwise. On road trips I like to get where I am going and rarely stop except for anything but a quick potty break, much less to just go for a walk for 45 minutes! But it was really nice and I appreciated every step of my walk with God. I talked to Him as I walked and He is such a good listener and comforter.

I did my 10 pages of reading after I got home and visited with my boys for a little while. I was worn out, and kept falling asleep while reading. But I did it. Day 9 done.

I will be home now for a little while and I am soooo looking forward to some normalcy, being in my own bed, cooking in my own kitchen, and hanging out with my boys. Doing this challenge while traveling has definitely been interesting! I am sticking to my diet plan, but I am really excited that for the next week when I can cook for myself, which makes it 1000x easier. Yes, I can cook in my little Garland apartment, but its very small and just intended for simple things.

I know a lot of you have let me know that you have decided to do the 75 Hard challenge too. I am so proud of you! It is easier than I expected in some ways, and harder in others. But believe me, as lazy and tired and busy as I am, if I can do it then anyone can!

Then something snapped inside of me last September and I felt the strength, for the first time in a really long time, to make some real changes and take better care of myself. I’ve shared here how I cut carbs and changed my eating lifestyle. I haven’t eaten sugar or junk since Oct 1, 2021. There’s no secret or magic pill….I just did it and by the grace of God I have stuck with it.

But I didn’t start exercising again. Maybe I wasn’t ready, maybe I was just lazy (most likely), but I knew that would have to be the next adjustment I made. Then I got busy remodeling the Garland house and that took all of my focus. But now that is done and I am ready to take the next step.

To be clear, when I say I am ready I don’t mean my life schedule is clear and this is an easy time to do it. Just the opposite! I am traveling a lot and starting back to homeschool next week and we have a lot happening here. What I mean is that I am emotionally ready, so I am going for it.

I had heard of a challenge called 75Hard. I felt led to read more about it, so I did. Then I thought I should talk with James about it, so I did. Then I wondered what my chiro (who I am seeing regularly for hip pain) would think so I asked him. Long story short….I have gotten support and decided to do it. And even better is my husband is doing it with me. And we are starting today….August 22,2022.

We spent the weekend getting ready. For me the eating part will be the easiest. I just needed to tighten up what I was already doing, so that isn’t a concern for me. The water, a little bit of a challenge but I can do that. I already like to read non-fiction. Not every day but I really enjoy it so that’s just a small challenge. But I have basically become dormant, so two 45 minute workouts every day feels OVERWHELMING.

I decided to get a recumbent bike since I have so many hip issues and my chiro thought that was the best idea. We cleared out a space in the house and made a little temporary workout room. After the 75 days I will need to figure out a more permanent solution, but for now this will do fine. As for outside, I will try to walk. If my hip won’t let me I will do weights and stretches. I am determined to make this work.

I’ve read several bloggers who have said they completed it and it was transformational. Yes, physically, but also mentally and emotionally, which is what I am hoping for. I need a shift at my core. I’m really excited to see how God is going to use this in my life.

Of course I will be all over Instagram every day sharing the good, bad and the ugly so be sure you’re following me there if you want all the details.

And for more info on the 75hard challenge, here’s the info from its creator. And let me warn you that there is a lot of negative out there about this challenge. I read it, I got it. These are not things I am concerned about. But I also know that if I need to I can stop. I am the only person who is making me do this. It’s a deeply personal goal.

If you decide to do it too, please let me know! Maybe we will start a Facebook support group or something. This is going to be interesting!

Before you shout at me through the computer about how we need to make concessions and we can’t get everything we want and we aren’t going to agree with everything at any church let me say that I agree with you! We aren’t looking for perfection. But we can’t even find a place where people will talk to us. That’s a bit of a deal breaker. And we do have some areas that we need to agree, but I know that we have some ideas that are not typical in the American church culture (like we don’t separate as a family i.e. youth group) and we are not necessarily expecting to find those things.

Recently I was driving around in Garland, TX, exploring the area (I know it seems like I just changed the subject, but hang with me here). I discovered a community garden and just loved the idea of that. It was so peaceful and there are always quite a few people there. So now I intentionally drive that way whenever I can because I think it’s so lovely. Not being a gardener, I have never stopped, but I consider it every time I go by and see people out there working and visiting.

Then one morning as I was driving by there was a small group of people sitting in chairs they must have brought themselves, listening to someone talking. I imagined this was some kind of gardening expert teaching them something about plants or insects or soil. And it hit me like a ton of bricks…THIS is what church is supposed to look like.

Let me make a few analogies for you:

1. Unity of purpose. These people all have one purpose, to grow a garden. They tend the community garden and grow vegetables, fruit and flowers. That’s what church should be, all of us gathering with a single purpose….to glorify God and establish His kingdom on earth. Not to sit and listen to fun music, a peppy sermon then leave immediately without speaking to anyone.
2. To learn from one another. Some of us have wisdom and experience that other people need. If Bob is great at insect control and Betty has insects then she needs Bob’s wisdom. If we are encouraging each other to grow our own, smaller gardens at home then we can become better as a group and individually. We need each other’s wisdom and knowledge.
3. To do hard work together. A huge community garden can’t be kept healthy and thriving by one or two people. It’s a group effort. Sure there are people who are in charge of specific areas, maybe their gifting is in dealing with weeds or harvesting tomatoes at the perfect time. But that doesn’t mean they should do it alone. They give instruction and many gather to work alongside them. In my personal church experience, it’s a few people doing all of the work while the rest of the people just go on Sunday morning to be served.
4. To know one another. It’s not embarrassing to tell your gardener friend, “I am struggling with weeds.” They can help you! And it shouldn’t be embarrassing to tell your church friend, “I am struggling with anger.” But we don’t. We are under this pressure to look perfect and all together, sitting next to another perfect person that we don’t even turn and say hello to. Why? Why is church not the safest place to share your struggles just like the community garden is where you would share your issues with growing plants?
5. To feed the community. We are meant to feed not only ourselves and our families but also those in need around us. And of course, I mean this not only with actual food but with the Bread of Life.
6. To glorify God. Even a fool knows he isn’t the one who grows the plant. We do the small things we are led to do, but God is the creator. 1 Corinthians 3:7 “So, neither he who plants nor he who waters is anything, but only God who gives the growth.”

I do realize this analogy has some holes in it, but the heart of it is what I’m talking about. True fellowship, unity of purpose and a place to share your struggles and lift up others. I don’t care about the committees or the drums or the coffee shops. I want to just sit and get to know others and let them get to know me. Let’s hear wisdom from the wise, let’s bear one another’s burdens.

I am guessing that some reading this will say, “Our church is like that!” Maybe. What I will ask you is this….is it like that for everyone? Or just a few? Some churches we have visited make promises like that but then we go and for months not a soul even says hello to us and it’s obvious that most of the people show up on Sunday to get fed a sermon then leave before the closing song is finished.

And yes, we do go and say hello to people, try to meet new people and are willing to do that work ourselves (even though we are the visitors). And it STILL feels impossible. People just aren’t interested.

Of course there’s so much more to what a church should be. What do they believe? How do they spend their money? Do they live what they preach? Is there accountability? Are they living by the Word?

I don’t know the solution. Home church? A fresh vision for what church should be? When that happens so often it grows too quickly (perhaps because people are starving for it) and it veers off path. I know when I share a little about our struggle to find a church on social media I get hundreds of responses saying, “us too!” It’s a real problem.

I know we haven’t found it anywhere near us. But I am never going to give up. I do wonder if the current political climate will create change in the church and separate the wheat from the chaff. Which brings me full circle back to the little community garden and its appeal. If you’re in the same situation we are in at least we can know we are not alone.

We have now had several guests and we’re up and running. Halleluyer!

One thing we really wanted was a place that was centrally located to all of our kids. Garland was a great spot because two of the kids (not kids I guess since they’re grown and flown) live there and the rest of them are a 5-ish hour drive or less. (I say “-ish” because you know how it is traveling with toddlers!) We wanted to be able to use the place for family gatherings, and that is exactly what we did last weekend. (me dancing again)

When we knew we were nearly finished with the house I texted our family group and asked everyone to toss out possible dates they could get together. With this many people it’s near impossible to accommodate everyone, but we got very close. All but one of the kids made it and we had a fabulous time together!

These days it’s so much more than James and I + the 9 kids. There are in-laws and grandkids and it keeps on growing. This past weekend we had 20 people in that cute little house and were bursting at the seams. But we made it work and it was super special.

On Friday night there were less of us so we had a quieter evening. We had tacos (which is east for me to eat low carb!) and played a new game called “Cards Christians Like”. It was so funny, we all kept cracking up at the cards and people’s answers. These card makers really seem to get the church life. You can only purchase it through their site, so here’s a link if you want to order one for yourself.

On Saturday we all were there and it was a bit more crowded. But I laid out a basic charcuterie for lunch (I forgot to take any pictures but it was just lunch meat, cheese, fruits, veggies, nuts, pickles, various regular and gluten-free crackers and breads, etc.) I don’t have serving dishes there, so I put each thing on its own paper plate and laid them out in a pretty arrangement and it actually looked nice! This is the third year I have done a charcuterie for this get-together because we have so many dietary restrictions this makes it easier for everyone.

Saturday we played another new game called Tapple. It was super easy to play with everyone while we just sat around the room. Of course, we are all pretty hard core game players so some rounds went on and on and on. These people never cease to amaze me with their cleverness! Some rounds I was happy to go out early so I could just sit back and soak in the people around me going after a win.

Saturday evening we ordered pizza from a nearby Blaze. Again, they can accommodate all of the dietary needs so it was easy and I felt done cooking (if you have followed me at all you know I really don’t enjoy cooking). Between the pizza and all of the leftover lunch foods we had plenty for the rest of our day.

In the evening, before the sun went down we all piled outside to take a family picture. I do miss that one kid who isn’t in it, but who knows if we will ever be able to capture the whole crew. Since we’re all spread out and there are so many schedules to work around it would be hard. So I’m happy with what God gives me. I am planning to frame this and hang it in our little private apartment there as a reminder of our first family gathering of, hopefully, many in this house.

By Sunday afternoon everyone had gone home and it was back to the reality that we all live far apart. I aspent the afternoon alone, cleaning the house and prepping for the next guests. I stayed an extra day to get a few things done and drove back home on Tuesday after a quick visit with my grandgirls there. I can finally rest a little, although working on the Garland house has given me some momentum so I will probably get going on some projects at home that I have been procrastinating on for the past….oh…..ten years or so. LOL!

I expect/hope we will all get together again this year for Christmas. This is our year for Christmas since we alternate with the married kids. After raising kids for 100 years and that whole time it felt like it would never end, somehow it did. Of course, we still have 3 boys at home, but even they are nearly grown and don’t need “Mommy” anymore. I know I’ve said it before, but it felt like it changed very quickly from all of us together all the time to everyone off and doing their own thing. I miss those “all of us together” days, but I don’t miss the grocery bills, late night dramas or being responsible for other people.

And there really is nothing like sitting in a room filled with the people you raised and watching them enjoy each other. It’s my favorite feeling (insert slow, thoughtful happy dance)

If you’re going to be in the Garland area and need a place to stay, be sure to check out our listing there. It’s cute and comfortable and we LOVE our guests!

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There are 5 houses that I set my sights on, those on each side, the one directly across from me and the 2 on each side of them. Some were easier to meet than others. One actually tried to meet me so they were the first and the easiest. We’ve exchanged phone numbers and visited several times. Three others I was able to meet when they were outside working in the yard and it was easy to go over and introduce myself. All very kind people.

But the last one, they were more of a challenge. Because the women there wear a hijab I knew they were likely from another country. And when I would see them and try to wave they didn’t give me any reaction. At first I thought that I would have to be content with us just each keeping to ourselves.

Then one day I opened my mailbox and there was an envelope addressed to one of those neighbors that had been accidentally delivered to me. I saw this as my opportunity to try again. So that afternoon I carried the letter to their house and knocked.

When the door opened there was a whole houseful of children standing there, wide eyed with surprise. They called out behind them and the same woman appeared that I had seen coming and going. I smiled and held out the letter and she didn’t instantly take it from me. Instead they cheerfully beckoned me inside. I accepted.

They were very hospitable, bringing me a small plate of nuts and olives and trying to give me something to drink. It was instantly obvious to all of us that this was going to be interesting….not a single person in that room besides me spoke one word of English. We sat there trying to communicate but our cultures are so different that even gestures weren’t working. I tried greeting each child and asking simple questions, but overall no one understood anything I was trying to say.

Just as I was about to leave a man walked in the front door. I didn’t recognize him as the man who lived there. He was surprised to see me and I was excited when I realized that he speaks English. Hallelujah!

He and I started speaking and he told me their story. He is the brother of the man who lives there (his wife and children were there when I visited….it was a full house!). Their families are from Afghanistan and they worked for the US military. He was an interpreter so he is the only one who speaks English. There are 4 brothers who were all brought here by our government with their families and dropped in the middle of Garland TX. They are struggling to find work or learn the culture and the language.

But this is the part he told me that really struck me and will always stay with me. He said to me, “We are so very happy that you received this mail and came to bring it to us. In our religion we don’t eat until we know that our neighbors have food. But you are the first neighbor who will speak to us at all.” Wow. This was so humbling! As a Christian why am I not doing this? Why am I not making sure that my neighbors are ok before I tuck myself comfortably into bed at night (of course I don’t actually have neighbors where I live out in the country, but still I have people).

Then the woman of the house started to say things for him to interpret so she could tell me all of the things she had been wanting to say. They have 8 children (they couldn’t believe I have 9 children!) and that they wanted to thank me for always tossing the balls back over the fence that their children lose. At one point he said, “She says you are the one who has been waving at her and it always made her so happy that you would do that!” I had no idea! They never responded, but I kept waving and now they wave back at me every time like I’m a long lost friend.

A few nights ago there was a knock my the door and it was two of the girls from that house. They handed me a huge plate of food. I didn’t recognize anything on the plate and tried to ask them what it was, but they didn’t understand me. So I just thanked them happily and took the plate. The next morning I was leaving for a few days so I decided to take the plate back with some other food when I returned.

I wanted to take them a watermelon. It’s so American and summery and maybe something they hadn’t had before. When I got back I went to 3 stores and couldn’t find any watermelons. So I settled on a big bag of fresh cherries.

I took the cherries over with their plate and once again I sat in their living room as the center of attention, but no way to communicate. Past “How are you!” “Good, how are you?” we were stumped. As for the cherries, they either didn’t know what they were or I just can’t read their unspoken responses so I have no idea if they understood what I was trying to do. I suspect that right after I left they dug into this curious bag the neighbor lady brought them.

And before you suggest a translator app, we have tried a few of them. It doesn’t really work for English to Pashto. When either of us tries to put something in the translator app, the other person has no idea what they are trying to say. I have learned a few words in Pashto. Hello, thank you and how are you. When I tried to say them they laughed and tried to help me say it correctly. My goal is to show them that I am interested in getting to know them, not to actually learn their language.

Not living in our Garland house full time means I may not have a lot of opportunities to build this relationship, but I’m happy with whatever God does with all of these neighbor friendships. I see myself as His tool to use however He wants. And thankfully all of them are kind and happy to meet us.

And who knows, maybe we are meant to help these people from half way around the world in some way and show them that there are Americans who care about them. And I am already affected by the care they have shown me. I think it will be good for all of us.

Summertime. And the livin’ is easy.

Unless of course it’s 109° outside and your A/C is crying out for help and the ice machine can’t make enough ice for you to actually bathe in.

I went to the store yesterday and as I stepped out of my car I wondered what kind of crazy state of mind I must have been in to decide this was the day to go pickup a few things I didn’t desperately need. That parking lot asphalt is like walking on the surface of the sun. And I can’t even tell you how hot it was in my car after I came back out of the store, but I’m pretty sure I could have baked a turkey in there.

My post last week was about beating the heat. But it wasn’t about the actual heat. Instead I cleverly used the analogy as a way of sharing tips for staying cool emotionally. But now I feel I must talk about the actual heat wave we’re having, because I’m in Garland this week and the high today will be 108°. One hundred and eight!

In case you didn’t see on my Facebook a couple of weeks ago, our new rental house in Garland has an enclosed garage that will be a private space for me to stay when I’m there. And the new AC wasn’t working in there. Yeah. That was very annoying. I thought it was hot then at 102° outside, when I could still be ok as long as I remained motionless with no lights on and had 3 fans blowing directly on me. But silly me….I should have known that was chilly compared to what it would be just two weeks later in mid-July.

Thankfully, after some mild threats to our contractor, the AC got fixed. Yeah, he wasn’t the greatest. But it works now and I’m able to stay cool, so I won’t complain. I also got myself the same nugget ice maker for the Garland apartment that I have back at home. And that, my friends, has been an absolute lifesaver! To be able to fill my stainless steel tumbler to the top with nugget ice, then pour in my electrolyte water and sip on it all afternoon helps this cold-loving mama make it through these sweltering days.

I’m also basically wearing the same 2 things every day. I usually like to switch up my wardrobe a lot, but right now it’s just about being as cool as possible and I have two lightweight tops that wick the heat away from me. So I wash one/wear one. I’m a big fan of modesty, but if I gets any hotter I can’t promise not to strip down to my bra and panties right there in the Target parking lot.

Speaking of bras, girl, I got myself a new one and it has changed.my.life. Every blazing hot summer I fight heat rashes in….ahem….feminine places. It’s rough. It hurts and once the sweat starts to pour the rashes start to appear. But this summer with my new bra from Soma I haven’t gotten a single rash. It’s comfy and cool and if I wasn’t already married I’d propose to it. If you haven’t tried their undies (both tops and bottoms) I’m recommending you get to a Soma as quick as you can.

And of course, I use a lot of my fave Young Living summer goodies. Electrolytes and cooling mist and insect repellant. Here’s a list of my summer must haves! Between these and my nugget ice and my working air-conditioner I might just make it through this scorching summer of 2022.

Well friend, I hope you’re able to stay cool. My weather app says this time next week it’ll only be a high of 104°. Wow. I might have to unbox my sweaters and jackets.

Hang in there! We can survive this together.

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