Find it here on Apple or Spotify Podcasts

Disclaimer: This episode is meant for entertainment and general medical information purposes only. It is not medical advice. Please consult your own provider for guidance specific to your pregnancy.

Watch the original video:
Find the original episode on Youtube https://youtu.be/aqHSHhcyrvQ?list=PLtc_SbtL2LYHwTOyMArKTWoxAQD0G2lsq

Why Hilary is an expert:
Hilary Erickson has been a nurse since 1997 and brings over 20 years of labor and delivery expertise to the podcast. Having helped thousands of people push out their babies, she knows firsthand how every birth is different and what really works in the delivery room.

 00:00 Pushing and Parenting: No Rules

05:12 “Pushing Techniques in Childbirth”

06:07 “Flexibility in Birthing Methods”

10:07 Optimal Positions for Pushing Birth

13:38 “Preparing for Pushing at Delivery”

The post How to Push Out Your Baby: Options, Expert Advice, and Personal Choice 265 appeared first on Pulling Curls.

2 Parks Close 1 Park Far (+ Water Park)

The Universal Orlando has 4 parks. Two of them are right next door to each other (think Disneyland and California Adventure):

Universal Orlando — The Original Park. It’s age is showing, and they are working to mix it up a bit, but still a lovely park, and has one of my favorite Harry Potter areas.

Islands of Adventure – This park may have the best coasters of any park, anywhere — between Velocicoaster, Hagrid’s and then Hulk (at a very distant 3rd).

Those two parks are right next door to each other. You can go between them using the Hogwart’s Express (stay tuned for more on that) or easily walking.

There is also Volcano Bay — their water park. I’ve never been, but I’ve heard rave reviews.

Epic Universal — The newest park. This park is amazing, but new — and doesn’t have a ton of rides. But, even with Express pass I’d still have loved to spend another day there. It is pretty far from the other parks — not walkable. It also has it’s own set of hotels around it.

Looking for more Epic Universe Info — be sure to check out these posts:

• Ways to Save at Epic Universe
• 7+ EASY TIPS for the Universal Orlando Resort + 3 JUST For Epic Universe!

Great Transportation

Just like the Disneyland resort, there is great transportation between the different parks and also the Universal hotels and the parks.

Just make sure the bus is going where you want to go. I have heard they’re hoping to set up separate transportation between the 2 main parks and Epic Universe (think: Skyliner, although I think they’re going below ground vs above ground). Currently, it’s just busses.

FYI, it takes about 15 minutes to get between the Epic Universe area and the “main” area. You do go through “regular” Orlando to get there.

Confusing Booking – Free Help!

Much like Disney World there are a LOT of options to stay both on property and off property.

In my best ways to save with Epic Universe I detailed how we switched hotels a few times to save both time and money. Guys, you need an expert on this one.

I used Get Away Today. Their assistance is free (I’m seeing a LOT of people charging for it lately).

• They can check a few different systems to make sure you’re getting the best pricing
• They book both on-site hotels & off-site hotels (we stayed at the Fairfield close by one night, and it was lovely).
• I checked back every 3-4 weeks to make sure the pricing hadn’t changed (several times it went down, and they quickly saved me some cash!) — this would have been a HUGE PAIN to do on my own!
• They’ll happily book you several hotels for your stay and answer questions about both the park, hotel transitions, and each resort!

Use coupon code CURLS10 to save an extra $10 on your trip with them!

I’ve used them for years to book Disneyland, and I will say for a long time their Disney World & Universal booking were confusing — but it’s gotten a LOT better in recent years, and they’re a valued partner now!

You can still my trip calculator as well:

Citiwalk=Downtown Disney

Ok, if you’re familiar with Downtown Disney or Disney Springs, that’s similar to Citiwalk. AND, similar to Downtown Disney at Disneyland — Citiwalk is what you walk through to get to the parks from the transportation hub.

There are a bunch of restaurants in there, and entertainment options.

Frankly, I just usually zoom through it on my way to the parks, but it’s there, and may be an option if you want to get out of the parks for a bit (we’ll talk more about food in a couple of sections).

Pro Tip: Stay at the Hard Rock, Portofino, Sapphire Falls or Royal Pacific and you can take a boat to the parks (or walk — which is usually what we do — about 10 minutes from Royal Pacific or Hard Rock). You get to skip City Walk which is really nice (in my opinion). And yes, I did use Get Away Today to book those.

Universal Express = Lightening Lane

Every park has their own system to pay more and “skip the line” (Knotts oas Front of the Line Passes and Dollywood has Time Saver).

In the Universal sphere they’re called Universal Express. There’s a few options where you can skip each ride just once or in the older parks you can get one that allows you to the skip the line as many times as you’d like.

At Epic Universe these must be purchased separately (or as a combo with the other 2 parks). However, you can get Express Passes if you stay at either the Hard Rock, Royal Pacific or Portofino resorts (but not Sapphire Falls — even though it’s considered “deluxe” as well) you get express passes included for your stay (for everyone named on your reservation).

This is a huge perk and one that Disney does not give with their nicest resorts.

I also give the BIG tip that every night’s stay gets you two days of unlimited express passes — so we most often include one night at those deluxe resorts during our stay. More in that post on how to save on your trip.

Now, if you take a peek at the pricing you’ll see this is not cheap. It’s most often much more than the price of your ticket. Because the cost is so high, there aren’t many people in the Express Pass line, meaning it moves much quicker than it does at Disney. A nice perk. But a pricey one.

A Note on Epic Express Passes:

As I said above, they are not included with any of the deluxe hotels –you must purchase it separately.

However, if you’re not staying at one of those express pass included resorts, I’d encourage you to check out the pricing on the multi-day express pass options.

Personally, we did pay for express pas at Epic Universe. I think we could’ve done the day without it, but we would have missed the Harry Potter Ride — and since that was a “can’t miss” for us, we splurged, but it’s a lot! We sure did enjoy it though!

Food Isn’t a Highlight

When I say this, I mean the original parks — Universal Orlando and Islands of Adventure. Their food is just your basic park foods. Even the foods people tell me are “amazing” I think — meh.

However, the food at Epic Universe is probably the best theme park food I’ve ever had. The French Restaurant in the Harry Potter land is amazing (I recommend the Quiche and French Onion soup if it’s not blazing hot).

It shows me that Universal CAN produce winner food — I hope they bring that to their other parks.

I will say that we stayed at the Endless Summer resort and really enjoyed the food options there after a long day at the parks. There was a lot of variety that a family can choose between, and the value was pretty good for what we got. Plus, we boxed it and brought it up to our rooms to enjoy on our beds!

My hope is that Universal will up their food game in the future with their older parks, but as of this writing. It’s not there yet.

Great Shows!

I feel like a lot of the Disney shows cater to smaller kids, but they Universal Shows are so great!

We LOVE the Bourne Identity and Horror Makeup shows. Not only are they will air conditioned with good seats (a must in the hot Orlando sun), they really are fun for adults too.

I haven’t done the animal one for a long time. It’s not air conditioned (insert sad trombone sound) but I’ve heard good things….

Chill Out.

There’s no reservations.

No weird time for park hopping.

Just enjoy the day!

Less For Littles

Universal is more of a park for tweens and teens on up. It has less to do for littles.

That isn’t to say that you can’t take smaller siblings and have a good time, but you need to be aware (these are in comparison with Disneyland):

• Height limits tend to be higher
• Very few rides don’t have a height limit
• Some of the rides are just scarier (think Transformers and Harry Potter)

I definitely scared my youngest on the Forbidden Journey ride, probably taking her too early.

They do have a GREAT family swap program, that allows kids to do the lines (lines are amazing — more on that) and enjoy an air conditioned room while you wait.

They also have some fun areas for little kids including a Dreamworks area that is REALLY sweet. But, it’s just a nice playground…. There is a lot for little kids to enjoy (think Minons, etc) — but you just need to know it’s going to be more experiences, and less rides.

There are a few kid areas, Epic Universe’s Mario Land is more tailored to kids (but can be VERY over stimulating). I think the How to Train Your Dragon land would be fun for kids as well.

Just be mindful Universal doesn’t mind scaring people a bit more. Be thoughtful of rides you take timid riders on, and it may want you to wait a few years before you head to Universal.

Personally, I wouldn’t take kids much under 8 unless they’re younger siblings that just need to come along. For reference, I’d take kids of any age to most Disney parks, but think it doesn’t really get “good” til’ they’re about 3.

Pass Holder Benefits

I honestly had no idea about these until recently when I got.

Universal Passes aren’t much more than a 3-day ticket, but they do have black out dates — especially on the lowest “tier” of tickets — so, be very thoughtful of which tier you purchase. Honestly, if I had a 3-day ticket I’d at least stop by Guest Services to see how much it is to upgrade if there is any possibility of you being in the Orlando area any time soon.

Currently, annual passes are NOT good at Epic Universe (as of this writing). They do give some very mild discounts to Epic Universe, but I wouldn’t buy it just for that.

However, they offer AMAZING discounts at the hotels (no matter the tier you purchase). I think I spent around $40 to upgrade to a pass from a 2-day ticket. I saved well over $300 on hotels on my next trip.

They also offer discounts and some offer Express pass after 4 or free parking, depending on what tier you get.

Just something to consider.

Park to Park = Hopper

Every park system has their own “hopper” type pass — and with Universal it’s called Park to Park. You need to be careful about which parks you can go to — but a Park to Park is required to go on the Hogwarts Express as you are going from Islands of Adventure to Universal Orland (or Vice Versa).

While park to park wasn’t allowed initially with Epic Universe, it is now allowed.

I would have loved an extra half day at Epic. It’s just a great park!

You can upgrade to Park to Park if you decide you want to go on the Hogwarts Express. Just FYI.

Bonine to the Max

The Universal Parks are the first place that I realized I could get motion sick.

Oy. vey.

They have a lot of screen rides. If you’re a Disney fan — think Star Tours or Millenium Falcon type rides (or frankly Mickey and Minnie’s, that sometimes gets me too).

The magic of Bonine fixed me. It’s a single pill, non-drowsy, and magical.

Lately I’ve also added a motion sickness patch with it too — just to be sure.

If you’re a Costco member you can ask for a big bottle of Bonine (generic name Meclezine) behind the counter. Much cheaper than the small viles you get on Amazon (but I love to put those in my park bag).

Honestly, without it I can’t last at parks anymore. It’s spread to Disney parks as well… I’m a big fan of it, and I don’t notice any issues when I take it.

Lines are Rides

Universal’s lines are amazing.

Now, not all of them.

But some of them are just amazing. Ones that come to mind that you really want to walk through even if you don’t ride the ride (think Rise of the Resistance hanger type rooms)

• Escape from Gringot’s (that first room is amazing)
• Forbidden Journey

And, in Epic Universe:

• Frankenstein’s Expirement
• One TINY part in Minecart Maddens (the rest is very boring)
• Ministry of Magic (best line ever — which is good because it’s INSANELY LONG)
• Mario Cart — SO good!!!!!

Disney tends to make the “cool” parts pretty far into the ride, but these are well themed throughout.

Less Time on Your Phone

I feel like I’m on my phone 90% of a Disney day — checking wait times, getting lightening lanes, mobile ordering.

And a lot of those have perks.

But at Universal (especially with an Express Pass) I get to submerse myself a bit more.

Yes, there is mobile ordering (which I love) but you tend to sit down and then do it.

I love this part of Universal — maybe my favorite thing (as a mom of teens/adults).

YOU. GET. WET.

Not kidding there. I’m talking drenched.

Honestly, I hadn’t gotten that wet on Jurassic Park River Adventure, but the last time it threw a BUCKET of water on me. It was crazy.

But, the real wetness (i’m talking wetter than taking a shower with your clothes on) comes from

• Popeye’s
• Dudley Doo Right

So. sO. SO wet! Maybe you thought that you got wet on Kali River Rapids or Grizzly River Run. And sure, you get wet.

But not this wet.

I 100% recommend ponchos, and most important shoe covers like these (we used those exact ones — the one thing I’d recommend is to have your pants go OVER them — don’t tuck them in — my son tucked his in and the water traveled down — mine went over and I didn’t have an issue, my shoes were almost entirely dry)

Or skip them. Those are you two options.

Bags on Rides

And finally, Universal is a lot more strict about bags on rides.

But the GOOD news is, on those rides that they don’t allow bags on, they do give free lockers that are SUPER easy to use.

Some rides allow you to take a small cross body bag on (think just one shoulder or around your waist), and some rides do not allow ANYTHING on beyond your lanyard which you have to tuck into your shirt). You even have to go through a metal detector before you get to the ride. They’re serious about it. These tend to be on coasters — off the top of my head those are Hulk, Velocicoaster, and Stardust Racers.

In Epic Universe the lockers are nicely sized, but in the other 2 parks the lockers are pretty slim. They will not fit a lounge fly with the extra pocket in front. Just FYI.

So, there’s my best tip if your going from Disney to Universal Orlando.

The other tips is smart move. Especially if you have older kids. My kids LOVE Universal, far more than Disney. They love the themed lines, the coasters, the scares and the more “adult” humor.

I think you’re going to have a GREAT trip. Just be sure to check pricing with Get Away Today >> it’ makes it EXTRA special when you come home with extra dollars and great customer service!

The post 10+ Things to Know About the Universal Orlando Resort (coming from Disney World) appeared first on Pulling Curls.

Before we get started — why take this from me? Hello, I’m Hilary, the curly head here at Pulling Curls®. I’m also the curly head behind the website The Pregnancy Nurse®. I’ve been a nurse since 1997 and I have 20 years of labor and delivery experience.

During that time, I’ve seen thousands of moms labor, in many different ways, but I’ve seen what preparation actually prepared them to get a positive birth experience. I’ve also had 3 kids of my own, and know how your hopes and dreams can be really different than what the hospital offers.

I’m super glad you’re here, because this is a really important topic.

What is “Natural” Hospital Birth

This is tricky because we’re clearly not going to be giving birth in a wooded forrest floor, and not even in our own home in our own bed.

If you’re here, you’re likely planning on a hospital birth — which unfortunately doesn’t always look particularly “natural”. That makes me sad. I do know that the hospital hurts a few of our natural insticts, which I don’t love.

Personally, I do believe that it is the safest way to give birth, but I do believe that there are ways to get it to look more like what you’re hoping for.

However, in my 20 years of experience, it’s much beyond breathing and not getting an epidural. There’s more to it — so lets talk about.

Why a Natural Birth?

Honestly, this is up to you. Hopefully you’ve considered a birth plan (grab my free series here):

And in that, you’ve decided what “natural” means to you. Most often I hear it meaning:

• No induction – you go into labor on your own.
• No epidural – you rely on other methods
• No medical pain management – only natural methods

But honestly, everyone has their own ideas about what a “natural” birth will look like. Some mean delivering in a tub, or with zero interference from the hospital staff. There’s a whole spectrum of “natural” (which is why it’s important to use a birth plan to share what you want for your birth!).

Whatever type of birth you’re hoping for, doing a birth plan and discussing it with your doctor or midwife ASAP is smart. Some of the things (for instance, a tub birth) can’t be accommodated by all facilities. So, that’s good to know (and possibly change expectations or facilities).

I once saw a birth educator say you could “tell” your hospital you are bringing in a portable tub but I’m here to say that might not be the case. The hospital may not be able to take the load of the extra water on their floors, not to mention the risk of flooding. Be really mindful about who you’re listening to and if their recommendations are truly realistic. A LOT of people online give unrealistic expectations to get attention (and followers) on social media, but that’s not helping you out long-term.

So, my question for you — why do you want a natural birth, what does it mean to you? What are you hoping for? Tell us down in the comments! I think we could have a good conversation there!

Best Class for a Natural Birth

I agree that preparation is the key to a “natural” hospital birth — no matter what that means to you.

I also agree that the hospital doesn’t do a lot of “natural” things. I mean, that’s one of the best things about it. Natural doesn’t always mean safest. That’s probably why you have chosen a hospital birth team.

Cliff Notes: I recommend this class << I think it’s the best to truly prepare you.

So, what should a birth class include to help you have a natural hospital birth? Let’s talk about it….

Practice Natural Pain Management Techniques

It’s true, you want to learn some natural pain management techniques. It should include:

• Breathing — it is a powerful tool to help your body relax to help your baby descend into your birth canal
• Positioning — movement is a very powerful tool in birth (no matter “how” you hope to birth — even if you have an epidural)
• Other pain management techniques including heat, massage, etc

I really do think these are important, but I think a lot of people have boiled birth class down to just this.

Honestly, I think providers loved that this was the only way people prepared to have their baby. It made their job of “telling” you what to do about the rest of the birth easy on them.

Pain management is important, but is just one of the keys to getting a natural hospital birth (and honestly, probably the easiest one to teach).

Basic Physiology of Birth

I do see a lot of “natural” classes who focus a lot on this. But honestly, what you need to know can be taught very quickly.

I actually share one of the best tips about this in this post on birth stages:

While this can help to know what to expect, you should also be surrounded by experts who can tell you where you are on this path. And, the bad news is that our bodies don’t always listen to the “physiology” or go according to plan.

And then we have to….

Learn about Possible Hospital Interventions

This is where a lot of “natural” birth classes simply tell you to say no to these, “unless it’s an emergency.”

But, I think that you and I can go both agree that we’d prefer not to let things get to an emergency before we’re dealing with them.

If you see a leak in your shower, are you going to wait until it looks like it’s going to collapse into the floor beneath it at your house before you even call a plumber? Probably not….

Same goes for the hospital.

It’s important to learn about what the hospital might offer, what it looks like and how it can be used to help your birth be safer (because yes, these things do truly make things safer).

Things like:

• Breaking your bag of waters
• Using the IV
• An epidural to help labor progress (shocking that a “natural” class should also share how an epidural can help — but it’s true!)
• Inductions (there are SO many inductions lately, and it’s not just because people are “lazy” — I’ll have more of that in the next section)
• Cesarean birth (yup, you should know something about that too).

I think a lot of birth classes tend to take the idea that if you don’t think about it, it won’t happen.

And that head in the sand approach, my friend, causes birth trauma. It doesn’t lead to better birth outcomes. In fact, taking classes that inform you of these less aesthetically pleasing parts of birth really do improve outcomes. I talk about the studies in here.

Don’t get me started on classes that say “get your perfect birth” because no one can sell you that, but it sure gets clicks on Facebook ads. It’s a real red flag for me.

Honestly, I think they ignore a lot of this because most birth classes are taught by people who don’t know much about these things. They took have their head in the sand about it, so they don’t teach it.

Which is why I recommend a birth class taught by a labor nurse. I recommend this one.

At the VERY least they should be very clear to you that these interventions are sometimes very necessary and how to make choices about them…. and we’re going to get more to that. Stay tuned.

I was just thinking about cesarean rates and I gotta say that even my favorite providers who are very patient and allow patients to make their best choice still have a cesarean rate of 15-20%. That’s still 1/5 — something to think about.

Learn About 3rd Trimester Testing

Honestly, I think this is where a lot of birth goes off the rails for people.

Example:

At 37 weeks, baby is measuring small. You do an ultrasound to find out that baby isn’t getting what they need from the umbilical cord, and they recommend you be induced.

You had no plans for induction, you don’t want one but you slowly realize that mother nature hasn’t made this pregnancy perfection, and this may help baby have a better outcome if you’re induced.

I see this happen a million different ways:

• Preeclampisa
• High blood pressure
• Cholestasis
• Baby too big or too small
• Too much or too little amniotic fluid

I actually talk about these very real-life scenarios a bit in my insider tips class:

This is why prenatal appointments are so important. However, when your provider sees something off at those appointments they tend to send you for testing. Most often:

• Preeclampsia labs
• NST (non-stress test)
• BPP (biophysical profile)

And people go into those tests blind, and aren’t sure what will happen or what the results will mean.

And, when the recommendation to induce early comes back, they’re just not sure what to do because they never had this on their radar the whole time.

You may feel like this scenario is rare, but it happens in a good percentage of births anymore. People are older, more stressed out and have pre-existing conditions they didn’t have before. I’d guess in many hospitals the majority of patients giving birth lived-out a similar scenario.

Honestly, I feel so fierce about this part I have a free class that goes over it. I don’t talk about it much but you can join right here. It goes over testing, and anything else that should send you into the hospital in the 3rd trimester.

Most birth classes don’t really start til’ you’re in labor, but that puts you behind before you’ve even started. Good birth class teachers know this. I go over more about what you need to know in this post.

Learn How to Make Choices

And here is where we get to the meat of this issue.

Birth isn’t perfect. Our bodies aren’t always “made” to do this and we often have to pivot and adjust our plans to keep things as safe as possible.

A lot of times we don’t. And that’s awesome, but there’s a decent chance you will have to adjust some parts of your birth hopes to account for safety.

Honestly, that’s part of why hospital births are safer (and frankly, why a lot of home birth midwives send a lot of their patients into the hospital).

You have to learn to:

1. Take the information your provider gives you
2. Understand the option they’re recommending (and ask questions)
3. Make the best choice for you given the information.

For too long providers “told” you that you’re getting induced, but I’m here to remind you that every choice is yours, there is a lot of grey area in pregnancy & birth, and that you can both combine what you want with what your provider is telling you.

I actually have a whole induction checklist to help you get a full picture of what you expect if your provider is recommending that (I wish they were better about doing it, but smart peeps grab this):

A good birth class will help you know options, and how to make those choices.

It’s not going to put their head in the sand that these things “rarely” happen, because they frankly (especially in 2026) do not. These are happening frequently, and often for very good reasons.

I have a video on making choices (and I do think it’s the #1 skill you need):

Appropriate Expectations

Finally a good birth class should give you appropriate expectations for hospital birth.

I agree that you don’t have to follow “policy” — but like I mentioned above, telling someone they can bring their own birth tub to any hospital just isn’t helpful to most people (or, frankly safe for all the other patients in the hospital).

I think this is especially true postpartum (a big part of why I recommend this one).

Personally, I wasn’t prepared at all for postpartum and it made it all pretty miserable. I don’t want that for you. My birth class just acted like baby would come out and everything would come easy after that, and that’s just not true:

So, as you can see a good “natural” birth class includes a lot of things many people don’t talk about.

Anything you learned in this article you hadn’t thought of? Tell me in the comments.

And finally, I am glad you’re even considering a class. Far too many people don’t.. Good preparation makes for good births — and I think you’re on the road to that!

A few notes on a birth class:

• Because most providers are using advertising to sell their birth class the pricing tends to be far too high (advertising adds about $100 to any birth class) — which is why I recommend this one (word of mouth is plenty for that one)
• Be sure to check the credentials of your teacher. It’s important they have helped at a LOT of births.
• Check out if they have any free options where you can see them teach (including Youtube videos) to see if you’re a good fit. Not every teacher is for every student.

Check out this one (you can find some freebies here too) and see if it’s right for you!

Want more information on birth classes check out these posts:

• Why Most Birth Classes Fall Short: Preparing for the Unexpected in Labor
• 14 Best Online Childbirth Classes for Couples
• Free Birth Class with Insurance
• When to Take a Childbirth or Breastfeeding Class?
• Pregnancy & Baby Preparation Classes I Recommend

The post Best Birth Class for a Natural Hospital Birth appeared first on Pulling Curls.

In this post I’m going to talk about what the Curly Girl method did good for me, what it did wrong, and what I’m doing now. And yes, I normally talk about pregnancy, but I wanted to say that even small parts of our day can feel better, even if the world feels heavy.

What is Good About the Curly Girl Method?

There we a LOT of good things I learned from the curly girl method:

I have dry hair. Honestly, it wasn’t addressed when I was growing up. It’s just good to know that curly hair tends to be drier.

Condition & Brush Through in the Shower — this has been a game changer for me. For a long time I was using a wide-toothed comb, but I’ve found better options lately….

The effects of sulfates & silicones — I feel like these were exaggerated, but there are definitely effects from each of them.

What Didn’t Help Me with the Curly Girl Method.

Sulfates Bad: I was walking around with a dirty, itchy scalp because I thought I was NEVER supposed to wash my hair, and if I ever did I should use a sulfate-free conditioner. I itched for YEARS because of this… Unhelpful.

Heavy Conditioners: I thought I needed the heaviest of conditioners for my dry hair. I looked for ones that were super thick and creamy.

The problem is I have very fine, thin hair — maybe I needed something different…

Anti-Drugstore: I felt like curly girl pushed us towards more expensive products that are sold in salons or higher-end shops, but boy oh boy I’ve found some drugstore products I really, really love. That’s been a big benefit to watching Abbey Young. I’d tried Deva Curl, CurlSmith, Tre Luxe and Inahsi<< All of which were more expensive and honestly, aren’t working as well as what I have now. Not to knock them, but I think we just have no idea how little price point really means as far as if something is quality or not.

My Hair

I think it’s really important to know my hair and what issues I’m facing.

• My Curls are probably 3C. They’re pretty coily — especially when I take care of them well. My hair got curlier after I had kids, but I’ve always had curly hair
• I am starting to go grey, but it’s only a few strands (knocking on all the wood). I don’t plan to color them out, go grey gracefully (even if I’m screaming inside)
• My hair is VERY fine — you hardly feel it between your fingers when you just have a strand. This means the actual hairs are very thin.
• My hair is very thin — I’ve never had a lot of hair (people think I do because of the curls) but it is also getting thinner with age {insert me crying quietly in a corner). This means I have less hairs on my head than the average gal.

It’s important that I have a routine that:

• Preserves the # of hairs I have — I’d prefer it to get LESS thin — or, at least stay how it is.
• Is fast — I don’t like to spend a lot of time on it (full disclosure). I also REALLY hate the feeling of hair on my hands, so there’s that.
• Doesn’t break the bank. I feel like there are better things to spend my money on than expensive brands, but I am willing to spend if it will preserve the strands.
• Itches less. Please.

What I Learned from Abbey Yung

In case you have no idea who Abbey Young is…. I found her on Youtube after trying K-18 and wanting tips (more on that, stay tuned). Abbey has hair the complete opposite of mine, it’s bleached, and she straightens it several times a week. My hair is natural, curly and only gets about 5 minutes of heat/week (if that). However, she speaks a lot to scalp & hair care, and that is true no matter what our hair is like. She is a Trichologist, and I have no idea what that is, but I think it has to do with hair/scalp health.

Abbey Taught Me:

1. Good hair care comes at many price points (she often loves drugstore as much as high end and isn’t afraid to share that)
2. Our scalps need to be clean for our hair to grow well & look good — and that often means sulfates
3. There’s lots of conditioners that work well, you can try a few lighter ones to see if you like them!

I will say that after we’ve used a leave-in I tend to diverge from Abbey as I still need products that provide me with hold. She doesn’t talk about that beyond hair spray.

But, now I want to share what I’m using now and I’m a big fan of:

What I’m Using Now

I’d like to mention I’d LOVE to use the images in this post, but I guess companies can get mad at you for posting their images of their product… so, hopefully the brand names and links will be enough for you guys.

Shampoo

This has been the BIG change. First off, I’m washing weekly — where I used to use a very LIGHT wash once a month. Some weeks I even wash twice a week…. a real curly rebel.

First off — I’m a huge fan of Pantene Volumizing shampoo. I was honestly super nervous because this one is FULL of sulfates and lots of foam when you use it — but it was the first time my scalp was finally chilling out and wasn’t itching.

You can find it on Amazon (but I prefer the cheaper bottle you can get at Walmart or your local drugstore/supermarket)

And yes, it is pretty drying — but when I back it up with a good conditioner it helps.

ALSO, because my hair is so fine and thin getting all the gunk off of it that I put on really helps it look better overall. Something I didn’t expect. So, better scalp health & better hair.

I finally just had to jump in a buy a few products, even though I was nervous to try new things. The good news is a lot of these are pretty inexpensive. I’d recommend just buying as small a bottles as you can find of what appeals to you.

I also like the Garnier Pure Clean. It’s not quite as cleansing but still does a good job.

Honestly, I say get a cheap, small bottle (you may be shocked at the low price point) — see what you think of it. It’s also available at Walmart.

Honestly, as I’m typing this I’m thinking I should do a really good cleansing shampoo weekly, and then some other shampoo or Co-Wash (less of a fan of co-washes lately too, which is a change for me) the other day/week.

Which brings me to a system I was SHOCKED I liked so much — and that is Dove. Oh man guys — HUGE fan here.

The Dove Bond Strength Line. Honestly, my hair looks SO good when I wash with this. It’s also available at Walmart. I was just using the shampoo — but stay tuned, I’ve tried some similar conditioner.

I also want to try the Dove Intensive Repair shampoo (cheaper/smaller at Walmart) — I’m just not sure it’s worth it to own both of those (so when bond strength is empty I’ll try that).

I should say I did try the Dove Itch Relief and also the Moisture shampoo — not wild fans of either (and the itch relief didn’t seem to help my itchy scalp).

Common things I’m seeing:

1. My scalp needs CLEANSING which often means a lathery-sulfate (and also using good conditioner aftrewards)
2. I think I need protein — I don’t color, or use much heat but I think my hair is protein thirsty. Who knew? This could come from me brushing out snarls, or just how it snarls in general, plus living in Arizona with our high UV index.

Conditioner

Ok, I started this whole journey out when my stylist recommended some K18 for my hair that was falling out about 6’ish months after my appendix ruptured and I almost died.

It’s wildly expensive. However, both myself and my daughter needed some hair repair, so I thought it would be worth the investment. I mean, how can you brand be Pulling Curls when you have no hair?

I haven’t notice HUGE differences. I do think less is falling out. However, I think it was just a post-septic hair shedding at the time that I started it.

I now use K18 once a month after that Pantene Volumizing shampoo. I like it, my hair often looks great that week! I don’t know that I’ll re-purchase when this container is gone.

Things I’ve learned about K18 — I only use 1.5 pumps of it, and I lather it up in my hands really well before applying it — it’s easily wasted, so be sure to read the directions to help it get in as much of your hair as you can.

However, it’s not an “everyday” conditioner…. Even K18 says that.

For a REALLY long time I’ve used the Kirkland conditioner from Costco. It’s thick and I felt like that’s what I needed for my dry hair. But, K-18 isn’t thick, I wasn’t using another conditioner and my hair looked great. So, I started to wonder if some lighter conditioners might be nice?

I had heard from Abbey that CR100 was great — sort of the poor man’s K18 for protein and strength building. I got some. I like it, I don’t want to marry it — but I think I’ll keep using it monthly. It’s about 1/10 of the price — but you also use a lot more of it.

There are also a few other good protein systems like Epres I may try after my K18 is gone. We’ll see. But for now I’m trying to keep my number of products to a minimum.

I got the Dove Intensive Repair conditioner and I’m a fan (it’s cheaper at Walmart). I use it with the Bond strength shampoo. I like it a lot. I think they’re a good pairing. It’s not super heavy, and you just leave it in for a minute. I like that.

Just got this L’Oreal Elvive Glossing Conditioner — and I’m a fan. Abbey really made me think about my hair, and what it needs. It’s very fine, it’s thin and dry. This one is a lighter conditioner and I really liked it. Was my hair glossier? I have no idea. But I liked it. I feel like I got it cheaper in the store at Walmart, so check there or your grocery store too!

Themes I’m seeing:

1. When I use a sulfate shampoo it’s very important I condition well. It makes up for it — I don’t have to cut out sulfates, I just have to condition (which I was doing anyway)
2. That doesn’t mean the conditioner needs to be thick — mostly just adequte slip to brush through it in the shower
3. Thinner conditioners help my hair not be weighed down.

My hair actually looks “lighter” — I think, because I was using such HEAVY conditioners for so long. Or, it’s because I’m going grey, but let’s not talk about that… {sobs quietly}

Brushes

With this I started to look at the brushes I was using.

I only brush my hair when it is both wet, and has conditioner in it.

Prior to this I was using a wide toothed comb, which is fine — but I was thinking there was something better. I felt like I just had to pull on that to get snarls out….

So I got the tangle teaser, which I really like. For Christmas my husband got me a UnBrush. I like both of them. I think the UnBrush is a bit easier on tangled hair and it’s what I’m using in the shower currently.

Honestly, prior to this I’d just try to brush out the thing from root to tip, but I’ve started ear lobes down, and then tops of ears down, then crown down trying to work through tangles moving up my scalp. It’s lead to a lot less hair loss in the shower.

I also have a Denman brush, It didn’t work for me. It’s just to harsh, too many bristles (even if I remove some). I was trying to use it to clump my curls. I’d rather use the tangle teaser, I think it’s easier on my hair.

I also have one similar to this with the ridges. It does alright — I like it to create clumps when I’ve put product in before I dry, but I can’t use it to distribute product out of the shower. I’ve been using that tangle teaser or Unbrush to do that instead.

Leave-Ins

Abbey reminded me I need to be putting in something for when I do heat style.

Honestly, I haven’t found much that I like for this. I currently have the L’Oreal 21 in one spray. It’s fine. I don’t notice a big difference when I use it. But, if I’m heat styling I use a heat protectant. Just haven’t found one I love (I do like the Trader Joe’s one….)

But, I do want to give a couple of brands that I REALLY like for Curly Products.

Hairitage has been amazing. I love their Leave In Conditioner and Curl Cream. I use those two, plus a heavy gel (sometimes this one from Aussie) and I’ve had good luck. I just don’t think the curl cream has enough hold to just use that, and my hair feels a bit dry if I don’t use a little conditioner too.

Not Your Mother’s is also my new go-to. I like their curl cream (I get it at Walmart) and I also like the #3 gel, but I think the #4 (that refers to how much hold) lets my wash last a bit longer.

Honestly, I’m still on the look out for drugstore gel I really like. I do like this one, but it’s a bit on the pricier side.

A few trends I’m noticing:

1. I’m a drugstore girl — I’ve tried other brands of leave ins and gels and I haven’t been ANY more satisfied (possibly less satisfied).
2. If I do the was and conditioning in the shower right, I have less to worry about outside the shower. Just a little conditioner, maybe some curl cream and DEFINITELY some gel (which I need to brush through my hair to make sure it goes to all of them).

I also blow dry with a diffuser every other wash, as I’d like to keep my hair as healthy as I can.

So, that’s what I’m doing. If you’re a curly girl and you have a product you love — tell me in the comments. Things keep changing which makes it really hard to find something you like and stick with it.

That being said, I think it’s good to not use the same thing every time, but “speak” with your hair to see what it needs. Now that I sound crazy. I guess I’ll it here.

The post Why the Curly Girl Method Did Me Wrong (and how Abbey Yung fixed me) appeared first on Pulling Curls.

I gotta tell you I learned most of these tips from Get Away Today. They are who I booked with. You’ll at least get the same prices you’ll see on the Universal site, but they also have a couple other options they can book through as well to save you even more. I also have a special tip below that has to do with them — so, keep reading for sure!

There really isn’t a reason to NOT book with them — it’s so nice for them to check across hotels easily rather than you having to do it. Use code CURLS10 to save an extra $10 on your next trip!

I should also say that with Epic being such a new park there are things that are changing rapidly, so all the info in this post is as of the date of publication, but I will try to update as I see changes as well. Get Away Today can certainly get you the most up to date info when you book with them!

As a quick reminder/Universal Orlando 101:

• There are 3 theme parks (plus a water park) in this resort.
• Universal Studios and Islands of Adventure are right next to each other (you can actually travel between them on the Hogwarts Express)
• The newest park — Epic Universe is about 15 minutes away and all Universal Hotels have shuttles to it (that are really smoothly ran).
• Volcano Bay is the water park and it, again has shuttles that run to it (but I think that a couple of the hotels are close enough to walk) — I have never been there. Sorry (but also not sorry)

Ok, onto the tips!

Hotel Hop

Now, this isn’t for everyone — and I do feel like I have to do some fancy packing when we do it — but switching hotels can both save you a lot, and give you the perks.

Before we get going, there are some important things to know about Epic Hotels:

• The Helios hotel has an entrance directly into Epic — I wish it has been in my budget to stay there a night! (spoiler: it was not)
• Stella Nova has a walking path to Epic so you are not stuck waiting for shuttles (however, to save steps we just happened to match-up with shuttles nicely — that’s an option too. Terra Luna is close, but not particularly walkable.
• ALL Universal-brand hotels will get you early entry to Epic Universe (not just the ones by Epic Universe)

Some important things to know about the other hotels:

• There are a few select hotels that will get you Unlimited Express Pass to the other Universal parks with your stay (but not Epic — you have to pay for an Epic express pass if you want it). Currently they are Hard Rock, Royal Pacific and Portifino Bay
• Those deluxe hotels above, plus Saphire falls has a shuttle boat system to get you to Universal Studios and Islands of Adventure — and this can save you a good amount of time vs an Uber or the shuttle bus system.

Unlimited Express is Universal’s “skip the line” system — similar to Lightning Lane (but usually faster because less people use it — becuase it is more expensive). You can have it as “unlimited” (any ride, as much as you want) and also one-time only (one ride/day with express pass).

With all those facts I’ve mentioned:

It’s also important to know:

• When you stay at a hotel, you get their “perks” (aka early entry or an express pass depending on where you’re staying) on both your check-in day and on your check out day. So, you get express pass for TWO days, &/or early entry for two days.

Knowing all of this — we hotel hopped hotels to save us a lot in both time in line and time at the parks:

Our trip looked like this:

• Stayed at Stella Nova to get early entry into Epic Universe and be able to walk there if we wanted. We stayed there the day we landed, and then the night after our Day at Epic.
• Then, we moved to Royal Pacific for one night. This got us Unlimited Express Passes at Universal Studios & Islands of Adventure for two days. We were also able to easily walk to Islands or Studios from there (skipping their transportation center and crowded security area)
• Then we moved to the Surfside hotel for our final night because it was really inexpensive (another option to save even more is to look for an off-site hotel for the night before you flight out).

Yes, this was a lot of re-packing and moving hotels — but the luggage holding departments of each hotel is really good — they’re built for this, and even though that was annoying (and it did add a few Uber trips to our stay — at about $10 each) it was worth it for us.

Now, would that have been worth it if we had small kids? I don’t know — but I was traveling with other adults, so that was fine.

You just have to decide what’s right for you.

In fact, I have heard of people booking “Ghost” rooms at Royal Pacific just to get the perks and then they continue their stay somewhere else, but the night at the hotel was cheaper than buying Express Passes for their group.

Pro Tip: You get the Unlimited Express Passes for anyone who is named on the reservation at those select hotels. Most rooms will sleep up to 5 (I think). Remember that for every person you add to the reservation, the price does increase a bit — so, if you book with only 2 you only get two express passes. Using this perk is best for larger groups (but remember it’s for TWO days of Unlimited Express) which would usually run $500-$600+ for one person.

Keep Price Checking

This is where Get Away Today really shined.

When I told Get Away Today that I wanted to book with the lowest lines, and the cheapest prices they gave me a bunch of the tips in this article and they were were SO willing to book my crazy hotel plans as noted above (I even switched dates a couple of times) they also checked the prices for me every few weeks until we paid for our trip a couple of weeks in advance (at that point they are unable to price match once you pay for the whole trip, but usually the closer you are, the less likely you are to save).

The advice is to book when you’re ready. That way you have your room at your preferred location.

Then, keep having them check the pricing. We saved about $300 between our hotels by price checking a few times. And yes, we put that towards Express Passes at Epic — well worth it!

For me, I just snooze an email from them every couple of weeks and just say “hey — wanted to check in on pricing on our trip” and within the day they came back with how much I’d saved or that we had the best pricing for now.

It was super easy & great!

Looking for more info about the Universal & Other theme parks? — be sure to check out these posts:

• 7+ EASY TIPS for the Universal Orlando Resort + 3 JUST For Epic Universe!
• Questions About Universal Orlando & Disney World Answered
• Knotts Berry Farms vs Disneyland? Which one is right for you?

Be Flexible on Dates

If you have a few dates that you can go — you not only can you save on lines at the parks, but you can also save on hotel.

Just tell Get Away Today the dates you have, and they can give you some great options for each time frame (and possibly give you some pro tips about how busy the parks will be).

That means you’re not having to create an elaborate spreadsheet of the different hotel options, they do that for you!

That being said — a spreadsheet can be very handy. I have a trip calculator here (works for Disney OR Universal):

Want to know how busy the parks will be on your dates? No need to find a crowd calendar. Just find out how much express passes are for your dates of stay. Busier days, it will be more expensive (and more worth it). Less-busy dates it will be cheaper. Get Away Today can also give you this information.

Get an Annual Pass

This seems crazy, I get it. But the annual pass savings on hotel rooms can be significant. Like, shockingly so!

If you’re already purchasing a few days package, it actually isn’t that much more to upgrade (honestly, might be cheaper).

Some things to consider:

• Each pass has their own blackout dates — so you need to be sure that your pass will be valid on the dates you’re hoping for.
• You can purchase the pass online and it won’t be “active” until you scan into the parks, but you can show that you have the pass when you check in for your hotel (although I was never asked to see mine).
• You only need to get it for one person in your party to get the discount — they just have to be traveling with you.
• There are a few levels of park passes, some include discounts and free parking — so pick the one that works best for you.
• As of this writing, annual passes are not available for Epic Universe. As a pass holder you can purchase Epic tickets at a very small discount (but I think your pass has to be activated to do so).

Honestly, I was shocked by how much we saved by getting the annual pass discount on hotel rooms. Between checking pricing, and our annual pass savings, we just about paid for 2 Express Passes for Epic Universe ($500) — or you could pocket the difference. It was great!

Again, you can ask Get Away Today to check for Annual Pass holder pricing for the hotel rooms, and see if it makes sense for you. Yes, they are able to book rooms at annual pass rates!

I can’t stress it enough, but be SURE TO CHECK YOUR DATES — to make sure the annual pass you want is available for those. The cheapest pass has most of the holidays, plus summer mostly blocked out. FYI.

Off-Site

There are a lot of great off-site hotels that you can stay at. I stayed at a Fairfield that had a shuttle to Universal. It was pretty cheap, and pretty nice.

If the on-site hotel perks don’t matter to you, Get Away Today can suggest a few off-site hotels for you.

Buy Express Passes Early!

If you’re considering purchasing Express Passes buy them early.

I just added them to my hotel package. I had layaway, so I didn’t have to pay for the express passes until we got closer (I could have also removed them, if I decided the cost wasn’t worth it).

But, the price for Express Passes goes up the closer your dates get (with it be the most expensive to purchase at the parks). I believe ours were about $250 and were closer to $400 at the gates the day of our visit.

Extended Express Passes?

Here is a new one: Get a Multi-Day Express Pass.

Now, these aren’t unlimited, but you can use them at each of the parks (including Epic Universe).

I just went and checked — 3-day Express Passes were about $450-$575 depending on the days you’re staying.

If you wanted to get an Epic Express Pass — those tend to be around $300 — so it wouldn’t be all that much to add the 3-day and that could be cheaper than getting the Epic Express plus the increased price of those Deluxe Hotels.

Personally, here is how it played out for us:

Our Express passes were about $250 for each of us at Epic, plus $380 for a night at Royal Pacific (which is CRAZY cheap — don’t plan on that price — remember that was at a lower park day, and had an annual passholder benefit plus I price checked multiple times). But, you’d have to minus $100 from the hotel to compensate for staying somewhere else (that’s on the low end) for a grand total of about $780 for 2 people for the 3-days (and that includes unlimited express at Universal and Islands).

I am not sure exactly how much the 3-day express passes would have been, but I’d guess $500 for our dates of stay. So, that would be $1,000 for 2 people and would have only been one-time usage at Universal and Islands.

Clearly, our deal was better, but you’ll want to check:

• Pricing for 1-day Express passes at Epic
• Prices for 3-day (or however many days you need) Express Passes
• Prices for the deluxe hotels that offer Express Pass (remember not ALL deluxe hotels offer it, so be aware)

And yes, Get Away Today can check all of this, and they booked my express passes for me. It was SO nice, and easy!

So, those are my BEST ways to save at the Universal Orlando resort. Honestly, we had SUCH a good time. I hope you have a wonderful vacation as well!

The post Ways to Save at Epic Universe appeared first on Pulling Curls.

And how do I know so much about this? Hi, I’m Hilary — The Pregnancy Nurse®. I’ve been a nurse since 1997 and I have 20 years of Labor & Delivery bedside nursing experience. I’ve been teaching people how to mange their pregnancies and hospital births online since 2014 and I’m glad that you’re here — because I don’t want this to take another worry cell in your brain! No need!

The Facts

The reality is that only about 15% of people’s water breaks while they are outside the hospital.

Most people’s water breaks because they are in labor — so they’ll have some advance notice that their water might be breaking (check out my post for signs your water might break).

I would say that most people’s water breaks:

• While on the toilet
• While in bed (you need a waterproof mattress pad)
• While getting up to go to the toilet

So, they are NOT in public.

While it CAN happen in public that your water breaks, the reality is this happens for very few people. So, that should ease your mind — it’s not like in the movies where everyone’s water seems to break at the most inopportune time.

And while we’re here, there is so much about birth that is not like the movies. Please don’t let media (or frankly, even social media) prepare you for what to expect and how to make choices during birth. I very much recommend this instead.

And, if you’re wondering if you’re gonna flood the whole grocery isle if it were to break, I’m here to say that most people — especially if they’re standing, don’t have a whole ton flood out. I have a whole post on How much Water Comes Out When Your Water Breaks? that you might find helpful!

Many people feel a pop and then head to the restroom and then more comes out there as they relax on the toilet. So, as you can see the chance of it being a lot, in public is really low!!!!

How to Prepare

Ok, but in case you are one of the ones who does have it happen — how do you prepare. Honestly, these are smart moves to use in those last few weeks:

Wear a Pad

In those last few weeks you’re likely to see some changes in discharge. Most people are wearing a pad just because of that. Honestly, all of that makes it sort of hard to know if your water has broken — because “more” is just coming out than normally.

Gross, I know — but I’m here to spread the truth, not just what makes you feel good.

Have Some Towels

I think it’s smart to have some towels (or puppy pads/Chux like these) around in those last few weeks.

I’d keep a few in:

• Your car (if you have one)
• At work

I actually have a whole post about what to do if baby comes fast that outlines more about why towels are helpful — but I just think it’s smart.

I know you’re thinking those Chux are an added expense, but they have honestly saved me so many times as a parent. Great when you have a spitter-upper or a sick kid. I’d honestly put them on my registry and know I was getting something SO HANDY!

I’m not talking about a whole stack of them — maybe just one or two old towels just in case.

I think it builds peace of mind. Kind of like taking a good class.

Looking for more water breaking info — be sure to check out these posts:

• Splash! Everything To Know About Your Water Breaking
• What Does Water Breaking Look Like?
• What Does It Feel Like When Your Water Breaks?
• Can Your Water Break While You’re Peeing?
• What Makes your Water Break During Pregnancy?

Have a Plan!

I actually get this question a lot from school teachers. Which totally makes sense. You’re there, alone with quite a lot of children — what do you do if your water breaks?

I think you need to have a good discussion with your leadership at your work about what you should do if something happens. That way you’re prepared and feel confident about the steps you’ll take to keep the kids and yourself self should something happen!

And yes, I also have a post on when you should go on maternity leave.

And while we’re here talking about plans — have you made your birth plan yet? I’d love to help you out in my freebie series right here:

Honestly, this is smart in any career. As a nurse, I knew what to do if something happened while I was in a room and while we can’t have a plan for every situation most often people around us are willing to help us at such an important time!

What to DO if it Breaks?

Ok, finally we get to what you should actually do if it breaks.

Here are the steps you should take

1- Did anything else come out?

There is a chance that something else comes out when your water breaks. It’s extremely rare and you’ll feel it — but if you feel an arm, or the cord you need to get your bum in the air — think propping your bum up in the air with your head in the ground and call 911. This is an emergency. It is rare but I want you to know that.

Ok, once we’re past that initial question:

2. TACO?

No, it’s not time for lunch — we need to know some basics for this one….

The anacronym COAT works too but you want to know:

• Time (just note the approximate time)
• Amount (was it a lot or a little?)
• Color (this can range from clear, to bloody or brown)
• Odor (does it smell?)

** If the fluid is very bloody I’d head into labor and delivery, and if it’s a lot of blood, call 911 or get yourself to the hospital in the fastest way!

3. Call your provider

While not everyone needs to head to the hospital immediately I think it’s important to touch base with them. They’ll want that info you gathered with the TACO/COAT questions above.

Then, they’ll take that, along with your history and current prenatal situation to make a plan on when you should head into the hospital.

Most providers have someone on 24/7 for them for just such a phone call towards the end of your pregnancy. I’d ask your provider how to get hold of them in an important situation like this at your next appointment.

I know everyone seems to have some “magic formula” for when you should go to the hospital — but the reality is that it really varies and individual circumstances requires individual information. But, taking a good birth class will most definitely make those hours at home more confident vs scary.

4- Watch for Fever

The arch nemesis of a broken bag of water is fever. Now that your uterus and baby is open to “air” there is a chance for bacteria to thrive in that warm, moist environment. You’ll want to check for fever every hour or so. Your doctor or midwife should give their specific instructions when you call them — but that’s important to know (and have a thermometer at home to be able to check it — you’ll want one for baby anyway). You don’t need anything fancy, I think one like this is perfect!

Now, finally, we’re going to answer….

Don’t I Go Straight to the Hospital?

There is no question that if you have any questions you can always go straight into the hospital (or call your provider). Remember L&D is open every day all day! That’s always comforting to me!

However, just because your water has broken, if you’re not having serious contractions, your best bet may be to stay at home for a bit.

The best spot for early labor is actually at home. It can feel scary and confusing — that’s why I recommend the chapter on what to do in early labor in here.

But no — your water breaking doesn’t mean you immediately need to go into labor and delivery. You need to also consider:

• Any other labor symptoms
• Baby still moving? — if not you need to go in ASAP
• How far away your hospital is
• If your fluid is bloody, has an odor or is dark in color

And again — great questions your provider can go over with you so that you know what’s best for you to do!

For most people labor will start within 24-48 hours and as long as things are stable and safe being at home is a lovely, comforting and safe environment to encourage labor to get going!

You might also enjoy this post: What to Do in Early Labor (Before You Go to the Hospital)

The “Bottom” Line

Here’s 3 things you nee to remember:

1. While most people worry about this, it’s not likely. This isn’t worth your worry
2. Make sure nothing else has come out when your water breaks (an arm or a cord) — this is an important question to ask yourself!
3. Most people don’t need to go right in when your water breaks, but you should touch base with your provider

The other thing to know, for a lot of people it’s not really cut and dry.

Yes, some people get a giant gush of fluid that is very obvious, but some people get a trickle. It depends on where on the sac the water breaks and if it’s just a tear or a big opening.

It’s tricky, unfortunately — Like a lot of pregnancy.

But, I’m glad you’re here learning. What did you learn in this post? Tell us down in the comments!

And please consider joining me in The Online Prenatal Class for Couples where we get both of you prepared for this tricky time!

The post What if My Water Breaks in Public? appeared first on Pulling Curls.

Find Your Hotel

Unless you’re staying with friends (or live close) — you’ll need a hotel. Sure, you can look, and book on the park websites (which is what I do for every other travel destination) but for Disneyland I’ve found a company that gets me prices that are SO much lower.

Honestly, zero ideas how they do it — but I can’t recommend them any more. I’ve used them since 1998. I’ve also arranged for you to save $10 with coupon code curls10 with them too!

When I had little kids I had specifics to a room on where a playpen needed to be, etc — and they are SO good because they’ve seen the rooms and can advise you.

My favorite hotels are:

• Best Western Park Place (the closest hotel to the parks — I believe even closer than the Grand)
• The Viv – this one’s note walkable but for the price it might be worth it to take the shuttle (picks you up at the front doors) or Uber. It’s quiet, and I just love it (previously called Raddison Blu)
• The Anaheim Hotel — This is where I’d stay if it was just me and a husband or a friend. The price is nice and I like all the open spaces that close to Disneyland (plus the on-site pizza place)
• Castle Inn & Suites — HUGE fan of this one when we had little boys. They loved the castle theming. The price is nice and they also have a giant suite if you want that.
• I also really like the Tropicana — it’s really close and the price is a bit less than the Best Western.
• If you want somewhere nicer I’d check out the Westin or the JW Marriot.

When looking for a room — a few things to consider:

1. Price point — Get Away Today has rooms to fit ANY budget. The Clarion is great for budget-seekers (but very bare-bones). Check out my post on Cheap Hotels in Anaheim by Disneyland for more!
2. Location — you’ll notice many of the rooms I listed are very close to the parks — because we love that. Check out my post on Hotels Nearby Disneyland: Close enough to walk to Mickey! OR save some cash and use Hotels with a Disneyland Shuttle
3. Amenities — want a nice pool, or a hotel near Disneyland with free breakfast, or a kitchen? What’s important to you there? BTW, want a nice pool I love the Cambria (or, if your budget is more check out the Courtyard). Pro tip: The Cambria pool is an upcharge if you purchase on their site, but is included when you book with Get Away Today. Crazy, right?

Honestly, budget is the biggest part of this — and I have a Disneyland trip calculator that will help you out with that:

Honestly, I’m good at hotels near Disneyland. I’ve toured most of them, and stayed at many of them. Here are a few more posts that might help you out:

• Disneyland Hotel Packages for Families: Alternative to Costco Travel
• Best Hotel Close to Disneyland
• 30+ Best Affordable Hotels Near Disneyland
• Disneyland Hotels in Anaheim, California: 10 of the nicest hotels around Disneyland
• 16+ of the Best Disneyland Hotels for Families: Near the Anaheim Action

Get Your Tickets

Ok, here is the one thing I am ADAMENT ABOUT:

Do NOT buy your multi-day tickets from Disney.

It’s the best (and and possibly only) place to get a 1-day ticket, but most people are getting more than one day and there is NO benefit to purchasing from them (but they will cost more).

Save and get your tickets right here.

That link can also save you on other parks like Universal and Sea World if you’re looking for that as well.

When you get tickets you need to know:

1. How many days do you want?
2. Do you want to park hop — that means you can go to both CA Adventure and Disneyland on the same day (or just stay in one park for the day — this helps a lot Disney Feet)
3. Do you want to include Lightening Lane (helps spend less time in lines — personally, I need it — but you need to know how to work it, and it can add “stress” to the day)

Our family has done this a variety of ways:

We love a 1-day Park Hopper with Lightening Lane to just DO the parks. We’ve done them a lot, and this is a rope-drop to close strategy that isn’t for the faint of heart, but we hit the rides we’re interested in and often ride them twice. This strategy is only to be done with older teens+ and if you’ve been to the parks before. I would NOT recommend this for a newbie.

We love a 3-day one-park-per-day with Lightening Lane — this allows us to take our time and do what we want, and likely go back to the hotel for a nap. Who doesn’t love a nap?

We also love a 2-day pass with Lightening Lane. Depending on our budget we may park hop, or we might not.

Want more info on tickets/other parks?

• Can I Buy Disneyland Tickets at the Gate? Updated with 2026 Info!
• Knotts Berry Farms vs Disneyland? Which one is right for you?
• San Antonio Family Fun: Is Six Flags Fiesta better than Disneyland?
• 7+ EASY TIPS for the Universal Orlando Resort + 3 JUST For Epic Universe!
• Dollywood vs Disney: A Theme Park Comparison

Pick Your Parks (& Get Reservations)

Ok, now that you have the basics down — what park do you want to go to on which day.

When you purchase tickets you can get one-park-per day or you can get a hopper that allows you to go to both parks.

Honestly, that hopper is pricey — and I enjoy not walking, so one-park-per-day is pretty snazzy too.

BUT the flexibility of the Hopper is also great.

The most popular option is to get a 3-day pass. If that’s you, we like to Disneyland our first day, CA Adventure our 2nd Day and then back to Disneyland on the 3rd (or, if you have Hoppers, that’s the parks I’d start at).

As of me writing this, you do need reservations to go to Disneyland. I’m hopeful this stops at some point, but it hasn’t as of yet.

If you buy your tickets with Get Away Today (honestly, smart) — they will give you explicit instructions on how to get a reservation with your tickets — it’s not hard at all!

Travel?

How will you get to the parks? Since we live in AZ we drive if it’s more than 2 of us, but we will fly if it’s two or less of us. We most often fly on Southwest (love their credit card – I think it’s worth the fee).

Then we Uber to the hotel. I’ve also used the Eve shuttle if I’m flying into John Wayne.

I know a lot of people think they should rent a car, but I couldn’t disagree more. If you rent a car you’ll be paying the car price, plus driving in the yucky LA traffic PLUS you’ll likely pay for parking at your hotel (and maybe at the parks too). However, I know for families with young kids this might be your best option with car seats, etc.

I do love the Art Shuttle if you have kids — no car seats necessary!

There are shuttles that provide car seats that you could check out as well.

If I can avoid parking I will do it.

Get Away Today often discounts the parking fees at hotels as well — a huge perk!

Dining Reservations?

If you want to eat at any of the sit-down restaurants at Disneyland/California adventure you’ll want to get reservations early.

Honestly, this isn’t a “need” for us — we most often use mobile ordering and are very happy with the results.

But there is something nice about having your own table and having a server bring you water.

My favorite restaurants are:

• Lamplight Lounge in CA Adventure
• Blue Bayou in Disneyland (this is the restaurant in Pirates — it’s fun, but pricey). Want somewhere similar, but cheaper, check out Cafe Orleans?
• And, I’m crazy, but I like the Riverbelle Terrace… and you can often get a reservation there.

I have a few posts about food at Disneyland:

• Best Disneyland Restaurants for Families
• Best Food at Disneyland: Eating at Disneyland easily!
• Food I hate at Disneyland that Everyone Else Loves
• 12 Easy Ways to do Disneyland on a Budget

Rope Drop?

Ok, what time do you want to arrive to the parks? I’m a rope dropper, but I an a morning girl.

Rope drop will allow you to get on more rides when it’s less busy, but it’s not for everyone — closing down the parks can be nice too. I rarely do that. I’m old.

But, decide what time you want to get there.

If you want to hit rope drop you want to plan to get to the parks about an hour before it opens to get through security, etc.

Top Rides First

What rides do you want to ride a lot? For us we love to hit Space Mountain first thing and save our Lightening Lane for later in the day because we love that ride.

Other things to think about is rain — outdoor rides may close if it’s raining (more important at Disney World where it rains more) — but I think this is something not a lot of people think about. So, we try to hit outdoor “must-do” rides first.

Beyond rain, rides will randomly close sometimes — so if you have a “must-do” I say hit it early on.

Beyond that — popular rides are awesome to hit early on. I have them listed in my planner here:

Mobile Order In Line

Mobile order is one of my favorite Disneyland things.

It’s just basically ordering your food on your phone. But I love to order when we’re in line for rides (hook onto to Disney wifi if you don’t get a good signal). It allows everyone to pick their food, and then pick the time slot when we will get off. It saves time, eats some wait time and then we can eat as soon as we’re off.

This post talks more about mobile ordering if you need more specifics.

This speaks to one of the most important part of a Disneyland day — being on top of things. Once you use a Lightenin Lane which one are you picking next. When you’re in line do you need to Mobile Order. If you want to get the most out of your park ticket you’ll want to be thinking ahead. If you want to chill out, I recommend Dollywood (love that place).

Mid-Day Break?

Going back mid-day for a little break can be a good use of your time.

I love to stack Lightening Lanes and give us a little break in the afternoon to either take our time eating, or go back to the hotel. Your legs need a break.

There is definitely a strategy to using Lightning Lanes effectively. I detail it here.

Shows/Parades?

Any shows or parades you want to hit — be sure to plan those into your day.

Personally, our family much prefers to ride rides at this point in time, so we hit rides during those times (often they have less lines).

Our strategy has 100% changed since my kids were little. Kids love parades right now, but you hate them? I promise it won’t last forever. I can’t imagine all the moaning I’d get if I asked them to sit for a parade now.

Exit Strategy

Finally, you’ll want to think about when you’re leaving.

The most popular time to leave is after the fireworks show — and for many people that’s just when you’ll leave.

You just need to know it’s a mob of people.

If you can avoid it, you might be happier. Maybe a late night snack, or another ride on a few favorites will make it less crowded as you leave. Important if you’re taking a shuttle or an Uber (less important if you’re walking to your hotel).

So, that’s how we do a Disneyland day. It all starts with hotel & tickets with Get Away Today. I hope you enjoy your upcoming Disney trip as much as our family enjoys ours. It’s a great day, as long as you know what you want from it!

Here are a few more Disneyland Planning tips that might help you out!

• Disneyland Hotel Packages for Families: Alternative to Costco Travel
• How to Plan a Disneyland Trip: 5 EASY Steps
• Gift Ideas for Someone Going to Disney
• Disneyland Untangled – Making the Most of Your Trip
• When Is Disneyland the Least Busy?
• 4 Things to Avoid When You Plan Your Disneyland Trip
• 6 Ways to Skip the Lines at Disneyland

The post The BEST Way to Do Disneyland appeared first on Pulling Curls.

Rather watch a video? It’s right here:

Problems with Early Labor

I think when we think about going into labor we don’t think it will be tricky but there are a few problems with early labor…

It’s confusing. I have a friend who says that labor comes in hindsight because you really only realize you’re there once you’re in it. So, early labor can be happening while you’re not sure if it’s the real thing. Many people have a long prodromal labor period where it goes on and off which is super annoying. That article has some great tips too!

Your Best Spot is at HOME. I know, I know –the movies make it seem like you have one contraction and you should be in the car by the next one — but the best place for you when labor isn’t taking your breath away is at home. Which means it’s just you and your partner trying to manage this part. Which leads me to…

Partners hate it. And this includes my own partner. He didn’t like having the pressure of helping me out (which didn’t come naturally when I was stressed and in a lot of pain), plus helping to decide when to head into the hospital. I think that helping your partner understand early labor can be a BIG win. That’s why I recommend this for both of you. Big help!

Talking about your birth plan can also be a good way for you guys to get on the same page — get my free series here:

What to do in Early Labor?

Today I want to give you 3 things to do in early labor. Since this is such a tricky (and can feel lonely) part of labor, I go into much more detail about it in here. << that’s so helpful!

Ignore It

Like a whiny toddler, early labor isn’t something you want to give a lot of attention to. This means you ignore it as long as you can.

Many people are up timing contractions that are 15-20+ minutes apart when their energy would’ve been better spent ignoring it.

That means finding something else to do, napping, prepping your house/nesting. All of these things can help you ignore it, and not give it the weight it wants to take all your attention (right as it goes away).

Yes, that’s right — I said it might go away. Just because you have contractions now, doesn’t mean it’s going to stay that way. I have more tips about labor here:

• You Don’t Need to Know Everything—Just This Before Birth
• 5 Things I Did for a Faster Labor
• 3 Things to Prepare For Labor
• Labor Contractions Explained: Your Ultimate Guide
• Why Most Birth Classes Fall Short: Preparing for the Unexpected in Labor

Call Your Provider

I get the feeling that not a lot of people know that they can often get hold of a professional when they call their provider’s office. That may mean speaking with them directly, a nurse that’s on call (who would upgrade to a doctor/midwife if they felt it was necessary), speaking to someone in labor and delivery or another provider who’s on call for the practice.

Giving them a quick call can give you a lot of reassurance in early labor. They can remind you what to watch for to head into the hospital. Review when you should head in and can honestly do a quick “phone assessment” to see how you’re doing. As a nurse I could most often tell in a phone call if the patient was ready to come in, or could probably still labor at home for a bit longer.

It’s not so simple that you call your provider’s office and speak to someone 24/7 — most often there’s an emergency line on their message, you call that number and likely will speak with an answering service who will pass your information on to whoever is on call. Just helps to know that going in. If you like tips like this — check out this!

Move

Ok, so we’re feeling good about being home and we’re not actually asleep (because if you can sleep — I think that’s a big win) I would encourage you to MOVE. This can look a variety of ways:

1. If you’re exhausted, it can be just turning over in bed, or using extra pillows to prop your hips in new ways.
2. Going on a walk.
3. Lunges around your house for a few minutes.
4. Trying different positions to hang out in. I have labor movement cards in here that can help give you ideas for this.

The idea is to be changing positions every 30 minutes or so. This is a GREAT job for your partner to be doing at this point. They can set a timer and then help you move and give you ideas for a new spot (that’s where those labor movement cards really shine).

Your pelvis moves when you move and it helps give baby find their best spot to get down into the birth canal when you combine movement with gravity. I’m a big fan of it.

TLDR: Here’s my 3 main points for you…

1. Early labor can come and go like a thief in the night — so ignoring it is a big win.
2. Incorporating movement into early labor is a BIG win. Don’t just lay on your bed in the fetal position afraid of what’s going to come — that helps no one!
3. Early labor can be more scary then you’d plan on. Getting prepared for it is a big win << and, involving your partner puts much less of the burden just on you.

I’m so glad you’re here. This is honestly advice that so many people ignore about labor, but so important! What are YOU planning to do in early labor? Tell us in the comments.

I will say in here I have a tip that people just HATE but solves so many problems. I did it in early labor too and while it made me angry it did help. Let’s get prepared together!

The post What to Do in Early Labor (Before You Go to the Hospital) appeared first on Pulling Curls.

Find it here on Apple or Spotify Podcasts

Big thanks to our sponsor The Online Prenatal Class for Couples — if you’re looking for support & helping your partner support you too — it’s the class for you!

Today’s guest is Erin Galloway. Erin is a licensed master social worker and certified perinatal mental health professional dedicated to empowering women, supporting families, and connecting people with resources and community. Erin is the CEO of She Might, the online resource and community for women walking through unexpected motherhood. Erin is a mom of two, a Phoenix Suns fan, Americano enthusiast, and podcast lover.

Links for you:

Get resources for your unplanned pregnancy: https://www.shemight.com/resources

Episode with Dani’s pregnancy story: https://www.pullingcurls.com/262-getting-pregnant-advocacy/

Timestamps:

00:00 Unexpected Pregnancies Affect Everyone

05:32 “Unexpected Pregnancy After Years Trying”

09:29 “Parenthood Decisions and Identity Impact”

10:17 “Navigating Reactions to Unplanned Pregnancy”

13:30 Navigating Pregnancy and Unexpected Grief

18:46 “Unexpected Twists in Pregnancy”

22:26 Varied Emotions in Birth Stories

24:06 Navigating Pregnancy Challenges Together

28:08 Effective Communication for Better Support

29:49 Maternity Support & Resources Hub

32:56 “Pulling Curls Podcast Appreciation”

Keypoints:

• Unplanned or unexpected pregnancies are very common—almost half of pregnancies in the U.S. fall into this category, and they can happen to anyone, regardless of age, relationship status, or birth control use.
• Many misconceptions exist about unplanned pregnancies, such as the belief they mostly happen to teenagers or people in crisis, when in reality, they affect people from all walks of life.
• Feeling conflicted, numb, overwhelmed, or not immediately excited about a pregnancy is normal—even among those who tried to conceive or are experienced in pregnancy and childbirth.
• Unplanned pregnancies can trigger complex emotions, including grief for one’s previous lifestyle, personal identity, and future plans that are suddenly shifted or delayed.
• The reactions of partners, family, and friends to the news of an unexpected pregnancy can be surprising or disappointing, often because they, too, are processing shock or need time to adjust.
• Grief around unexpected pregnancy is valid—people may experience ambiguous or disenfranchised grief, mourning the loss of their former freedoms or the plans they thought they’d have.
• There is a wide spectrum of feelings experienced throughout pregnancy and postpartum, no matter how the pregnancy happened; bonding with the baby and feelings about motherhood develop differently for everyone.
• Support groups, mental health professionals, and online communities like She Might provide essential resources and a sense of belonging for those navigating unexpected pregnancies.
• Social media tends to showcase only the positive or “picture-perfect” aspects of pregnancy and motherhood, but tough emotions and struggles are far more common than people might share publicly.
• Recognizing and celebrating small wins, seeking help, and finding ways to bring pieces of pre-pregnancy joy into new routines can help parents cope and adapt through the journey of an unplanned pregnancy.

Producer: Drew Erickson

[00:00:00] Hilary Erickson | The Pregnancy Nurse®: You’re pregnant and it’s not planned. Today on the Pulling Curls Podcast, we’re talking about unexpected or unplanned pregnancies. Let’s untangle it.

[00:00:07] Hi, I’m Hilary, a Serial over Complicator. I’m also a nurse mom to three and the curly head behind pulling curls and the pregnancy nurse. This podcast aims to help us stop overcomplicating things and remember how much easier it is to keep things simple. Let’s smooth out those snarls with pregnancy and parenting untangled: the Pulling Curls podcast.

[00:00:37] This episode of the Pulling Curls Podcast is sponsored by the Online Prenatal Class for Couples. It is the easy way to get prepared for your upcoming hospital birth. It’s quick, can be done in just three hours. It’s affordable, so much cheaper than a lot of the online birth classes available, and it’s meant to be done with your partner. To get a teammate rather than just a cheerleader, come join us today.

[00:00:57] Today’s guest is a licensed master social worker and a certified perinatal mental health professional. She’s the CEO of SheMight. I wanna introduce today’s guest, Erin Galloway.

[00:01:07] Hey Erin. Welcome to the Pulling Curls podcast.

[00:01:10] Erin Galloway: Thank you so much for having me.

[00:01:12] Hilary Erickson | The Pregnancy Nurse®: This was planned this episode,

[00:01:14] Erin Galloway: It was,

[00:01:16] Hilary Erickson | The Pregnancy Nurse®: but not all babies are planned.

[00:01:18] Erin Galloway: yes, that’s very true.

[00:01:20] Hilary Erickson | The Pregnancy Nurse®: So how would you frame, like what is an unplanned pregnancy? Because I think all of us think, oh, you’re 12. 12 is probably earlier than most people think. But Hilary, I have delivered 12 year olds, but you’re 16, you and your boyfriend just didn’t think about a condom.

[00:01:34] But that is not what we’re talking about here today, although that happens too. And we’re here to support all those people.

[00:01:40] Erin Galloway: Yeah. Well, I wanna start by saying almost half of the pregnancies in the United States are what you might consider unplanned or unexpected. And that could be, regardless of whether you want to be a parent, whether you’re already a parent, whether you’re in a stable relationship, whether you used birth control or other forms of conception or not.

[00:01:58] Basically, an unexpected pregnancy can happen to anyone. And so like, I’m glad you said what you said because I think when people hear unexpected or unplanned pregnancy, assumptions are made that this must be someone who’s younger or someone in crisis and that’s just not the case. And I think that misconception’s becoming less common as you see a lot of stories on social media from people with different backgrounds and experiences who unexpectedly find themselves pregnant, in a different season of life.

[00:02:23] So I think to define that is really an unexpected pregnancy is just that. It’s unexpected. That could mean, like I said, you were using contraception and it still happened. You thought you were done having kids. You never imagined having kids at all, or not anytime soon. You thought it would take a long time to get pregnant, so you started trying and you didn’t really expect it to happen the first time. And you’re not emotionally ready in that moment till you didn’t expect it. So I think a lot of people expect it to take time. ’cause we’re hearing more and more that it’s taking a year or longer to get pregnant. So these are all real stories I’ve heard from women we’ve spoken to. Everyone’s experience is so different, but I think there are just so many reasons that a pregnancy might be labeled unexpected. Yeah.

[00:03:09] Hilary Erickson | The Pregnancy Nurse®: I wanna tell like two sides of the stories. First off. We had Dani on the podcast, and she talked about how she used a syringe and semen from a birth bank and did it at home. But even for her, she was super surprised that it worked.

[00:03:23] So even though she, she put all this effort into getting pregnant, it still is like, oh my gosh, now I actually am pregnant. And I think that’s really valid. And I gotta say that as a labor nurse, people who do pregnancy all the time, I had a coworker who was like, oh, my boobs are really hurting today. My period must be coming.

[00:03:41] And we were like, how late is it? And she was like, like a week. And we were all like. Huh,

[00:03:46] Erin Galloway: Yeah.

[00:03:47] Hilary Erickson | The Pregnancy Nurse®: you know, trying And then a week later we were like, you should go take a pregnancy test.

[00:03:51] And she took one and it was positive and she and I both had kids that were just entering kindergarten. You know, we were just feeling like, oh, we are getting a little bit of our life back and she was starting back with a baby and it was devastating for a while for her, even as people who do labor and delivery

[00:04:08] Erin Galloway: Mm-hmm.

[00:04:08] Hilary Erickson | The Pregnancy Nurse®: Constantly. It was a lot and it was a lot even up until the baby was born. She didn’t feel like she had bonded with her as much. But you know, a couple months in, she was like, it’s exactly the same with the other kids. It just took a while and I think that’s so valid and I think a lot of people are like, this doesn’t happen to people that are like smart and like think about things like this.

[00:04:28] Erin Galloway: No.

[00:04:28] Hilary Erickson | The Pregnancy Nurse®: think about pregnancy all the time that my coworker was a real smart girl. Stuff happens.

[00:04:34] Erin Galloway: Yeah. And I mean, you see stories all the time where it’s like you just had your baby and six weeks later or however many weeks later or months later, you find yourself pregnant. There’s an ob, GYN, who’s on social media, Dr. Allie, and she got pregnant really soon after she had her baby, and, and it was unexpected.

[00:04:50] Now. Things happen. Again, you can get pregnant while you’re on birth control. So, it’s never 100% guaranteed. And, yeah, you’re right. Like I think even people who think about pregnancy all the time and think about their family and all of this all the time still can become unexpectedly pregnant. And I think that’s hard for people to wrap their minds around. They’re like, well, obviously if you weren’t using protection or weren’t doing X, Y, Z, you’re gonna be pregnant. Well, that’s not the case for everybody. And yeah, there can be that initial response of overwhelm, especially if you didn’t expect it to happen so quick. I mean, I have friends who were like, yeah, I mean, I feel like it’s gonna take us like six months to a year to get pregnant. Well, then it happens and your timeline shifts, right? not in control of that.

[00:05:32] Hilary Erickson | The Pregnancy Nurse®: And, we tried for two to three years to get pregnant with my last baby. And number three, and, after a while you’re like, well, this probably isn’t gonna happen. And I was just about ready to turn the baby factory off. Because again, I had a kid going to kindergarten and I was like, maybe it’s just time to move on with our lives.

[00:05:47] And, got pregnant. And then you’re like, oh my gosh, I actually am pregnant now. What am I gonna do? And you freak out a little bit. Like, I think so many people have these feelings and then are thinking no one else has these feelings. No one ever, everyone ever talks about how you’re like, oh, it took me three years to get pregnant, but now I’m like freaking out inside that I’m pregnant, even though I was trying to do this for so long.

[00:06:07] Erin Galloway: Yeah. The reality sets in, like I planned both of my pregnancies. They happen pretty quickly, and I think with both, I still had those moments of. Okay. Life is gonna change, especially with the first, I remember I, I think I was like three months pregnant, and I remember calling my sister sobbing because I was like, what did I do?

[00:06:24] Like we had, you know, been married a long time and we were just, we weren’t in the season of life that we wanted kids at that time. And then we decided, okay, this is the time, now or never, I mean, I feel like there’s never the right time to have kids. And, well, we made that decision and then it was like, okay, life is changing.

[00:06:39] What does this look like? Did I actually even think about what this is gonna look like. And I think that’s totally normal. And we’ve had clients who come to us and say, Yeah I thought I was ready for this and I feel like I’m not ready. And I think a lot of that is totally, it’s totally normal and natural to be like, oh, life is changing because it is.

[00:06:56] Hilary Erickson | The Pregnancy Nurse®: I love that you guys run a whole community around this because it’s sort of like the unspoken thing about how so many people have unplanned pregnancies. So many people have very surprised pregnancies. So many people have pregnancies that they feel conflicted about inside and people just don’t talk about it ’cause it this, like we’re talking about postpartum anxiety and depression.

[00:07:16] But I think this is an area that we really don’t talk about, that people have conflicting feelings about pregnancy and that’s okay.

[00:07:24] Erin Galloway: I completely agree. And you know, when unexpected pregnancy is a risk factor for perinatal mood and anxiety disorder. So those are things people don’t know. And we recently had our former director of communications on the podcast to talk about mental health during pregnancy and postpartum. And she shared like, that was, that was me.

[00:07:43] That, that I hit all the risk factors for that and that’s why I experienced such significant depression during my pregnancy. And, so I think those are just important things to know.

[00:07:52] Hilary Erickson | The Pregnancy Nurse®: Okay. So what are some feelings, since you have a whole community about this, I’d love that you’ll be able to, like a broad spectrum of people. How can that affect your pregnancy? Like what do people describe moving through pregnancy?

[00:08:05] Erin Galloway: Yeah, I mean, I think it can completely shift how you feel about the pregnancy, how you feel about your current life situation, how you feel about your partner. I think there are a lot of emotions that come with that. I think it can start by feeling very conflicted. Maybe you’re feeling numb or confused. I mean, we have stress responses for a reason and. We have these responses to pregnancy, so that could look like being numb, feeling confused, feeling very overwhelmed, and not, not being able to kind of even acknowledge the pregnancy. People feel that they’re not excited. That is really hard for people to overcome. They’re like, everybody elsewhere is so excited about everything. But I just don’t feel that excited. I think that’s okay. I’m not an overly excited person like with, with that kinda stuff. And so I almost felt like I feel weird that I’m not like jumping for joy and talking about this constantly. I just felt like I was weird for that. And then even like really not understanding why people aren’t excited for them, or maybe there’s just a response that they don’t get. I think those are unmet expectations that we have when you think, oh, my partner’s gonna be really excited and they’re not. Or their initial reaction is not great. Or a friend or sister, brother, parent, like, I think. When you get a response, that’s not exactly what you expected. I think that’s hard to process. It could also just feel like you’re being knocked off your feet. I think it just stops you in your track. So it doesn’t matter if you were planning to have kids, eventually never planned to have kids or didn’t have plan to have more kids. We see that a lot just stop you, help you pause, and you’re like wondering, what is this gonna do to my life?

[00:09:41] Like how is this gonna affect my career? What about my education, financial stability? What does this mean for my other kids? Like all of these questions come in. And so you’re just wondering like, okay, how is this impacting my relationship? What does this look like for my own identity as a mom, but as an individual? And what, what changes are gonna happen to my independence and what life looks like if I don’t have any kids? So just think there’s logistical things that come up in that response of like, what are we gonna do with this? But I also think there’s just emotional loss that can come up, and I don’t think that’s acknowledged.

[00:10:13] And I think for some people that does mean like grieving some of that.

[00:10:17] Hilary Erickson | The Pregnancy Nurse®: I wanna touch back on grief in a second, but I loved how you mentioned other people’s reaction because especially let’s say you have a boyfriend that you haven’t known very long, and then you tell your mom that you’re pregnant. And she maybe doesn’t have the reaction that you’re hoping for. As a mom of some adult kids, I can totally understand that. They’re not prepared for it either.

[00:10:36] They weren’t even thinking it, they might not even think that pregnancy was an option for you.

[00:10:40] So I think we gotta be forgiving of other people’s reaction and don’t take a whole lot from it because. We’re just, everybody’s human. We’re all just living our little human lives over here.

[00:10:49] And it just because your mom’s not excited for you initially doesn’t mean she can’t, like 360 turn, because I’ve had friends whose kids have had unplanned pregnancies and man, they love those grand babies so much. So don’t think that that’s gonna be your reaction forever, or if your reaction is gonna extend to your pregnancy journey.

[00:11:05] It doesn’t mean that, because I think, I don’t know if people listening or people of faith or people of like God’s plan or, just like life plans in general. But I think a large part of the reason we’re pregnant for so long is to give our minds time to wrap around the fact that we’re going to have a baby, to prepare for the baby, to prepare a relationship in our home.

[00:11:24] And, obviously the baby has to grow inside and all those different kinds of things, but sometimes when I hear about animals that have like a six week gestation, I’m like, oh, I’m glad. I’m glad we had more time than that to really wrap my mind around this. I’m glad I didn’t have 40 kittens, right.

[00:11:37] Erin Galloway: Yeah. Yeah. I think that’s a great point. I think I always tell clients you can’t control how someone reacts, you can take control how you process it and kind of what you accept into your own world basically. And, remember if this is a shock to you, it’s, it might be a shock to other people too. And people say stupid things, that is the reality. When I remember just early on in pregnancy, when people were saying things to me, I’m like. This is accurate. People actually say the stupidest things to you when you’re pregnant and postpartum and as you’re, you know, being a parent. It’s just something that happens and I don’t know what shifts and I think people have really good intentions and they just wanna be helpful, but it’s not always helpful.

[00:12:18] So that’s kind of on our end to set boundaries, but also be able to kind of process some of that.

[00:12:23] Hilary Erickson | The Pregnancy Nurse®: and allow grace for that initial reaction because, as unexpected as it is for you, it may be three times more unexpected for them.

[00:12:31] Erin Galloway: Yeah.

[00:12:31] Hilary Erickson | The Pregnancy Nurse®: Okay. Going back to grief though, I think it’s so valid to grieve, your pre-pregnancy life, your pre-pregnancy body, your life before you had to have all these different thoughts because,

[00:12:42] Erin Galloway: Yeah.

[00:12:42] Hilary Erickson | The Pregnancy Nurse®: before you got pregnant, you gotta think about like, what am I gonna wear?

[00:12:46] Where am I gonna party at this weekend? And then all of a sudden you know, this baby is coming, car seats, strollers, prenatal appointments, prenatal vitamins, trying to keep them down, trying not to throw up. What do people say about all that?

[00:12:58] Erin Galloway: Yeah. I think first, like grief is a natural response to change. And an unexpected pregnancy is a huge change. So, there’s a couple different types of grief that we see often with unexpected pregnancy. So ambiguous loss is the kind of loss that feels very unclear or unresolved. It’s just like this emotional pain that comes when there’s really not a lot of closure. Maybe you’re grieving something that doesn’t really have a name to it, or maybe it’s something no one’s gonna acknowledge as a loss. So that could look like grieving the version of your life you thought you’d have in this season. The plans and timeline you had in place. I’ve had clients who found out they’re pregnant and they had these plans this weekend to do something that you can’t do while you’re pregnant. That’s okay to grieve that, like that’s a sudden change for you. you might be grieving the emotional or practical support that you’d expected from your village and you didn’t receive it. You might be grieving your freedom or flexibility or the identity you had before this moment. I mean, we talk about at SheMight, that we don’t believe in the false dichotomy that you can have either your career or something, or a child, we believe you can be a great mom and you can have those things if that’s what you desire and that’s what you wanna pursue.

[00:14:04] And so yes, it takes sacrifice. We know your timeline might adjust, but there’s grief in that. There’s grief in processing that. And then I think when we think of your, like pregnancies, pregnancies have unexpected things happen all the time. We talked about this a little bit before that maybe you turned out to be high risk.

[00:14:21] And you didn’t expect that. And you’re grieving what you thought your pregnancy or your delivery would look like. and so when we’re talking about ambiguous loss, we’re also talking about disenfranchised grief. So, like I said. Ambiguous loss is kind of that without clarity. And then disenfranchised grief is the kind of mourning and grief that society is not really recognizing or validating.

[00:14:41] So you might feel that because people are like, well, how did you get pregnant? I mean, you know how you got pregnant, right? Like there’s no such thing as an unexpected pregnancy. That’s what a lot of people can say, but you might feel that, like, sadness that’s really hard to explain, but is real. And it’s dismissed by people in your life or just dismissed by kind of society.

[00:15:00] So I think that could look like grieving something that’s very intangible. Like your future that suddenly looks very different for you. You can still achieve those things, but your timeline looks different. Or, like I said before, maybe your partner. You thought would respond in a certain way and they didn’t. And so that’s impacting how you feel about yourself, how you feel about this pregnancy, and how you feel about your partner. And then, like I said, just kind of what your family looks like. I think they’re, these could not seem like losses to other people, but they’re real to you. They’re still heavy and they matter to you.

[00:15:32] So I think makes it really hard to process that when you feel like. Nobody else is seeing me. Nobody else is feeling what I’m feeling. And it can really make you feel isolated. So I encourage clients and, you know, members of our community to lean into that and process what they’re feeling. Even if it feels silly, it’s real to you, like, and it’s valid for you to process that.

[00:15:52] So, at the end of the day, you can find community, seek out support from, you know, mental health professionals, find a support group. Yeah, join a community and find people who will be able to kind of sit with you in that.

[00:16:04] Hilary Erickson | The Pregnancy Nurse®: I was thinking that we probably don’t share this much on social media because ultimately I probably wouldn’t want my kids to know that. I was like not super excited that they were coming.

[00:16:12] Erin Galloway: Yeah.

[00:16:13] Hilary Erickson | The Pregnancy Nurse®: I think it’s more okay. To say, postpartums horrible because everyone understands you’re not sleeping right?

[00:16:18] So it’s not the baby that you didn’t want, it’s the after effects versus when you’re like, I’m pregnant and I’m not jazzed about it. That ultimately is kind of like, and I’m not jazzed about you.

[00:16:29] Erin Galloway: Yeah.

[00:16:30] Hilary Erickson | The Pregnancy Nurse®: And so that’s probably why we don’t see people talking about it on social media, and I think that that’s valid.

[00:16:34] That’s probably not something that I want held for the time and all eternity for my kids to know those kind of things. Sometimes I see pregnancy announcements where people are just devastated and they filmed it on TikTok and I’m always like, oh, that’s kind of a lot for your kid later on.

[00:16:48] Erin Galloway: Yes.

[00:16:49] Hilary Erickson | The Pregnancy Nurse®: I, that’s such a valid feeling, right?

[00:16:51] So if you wanna film a TikTok, I’m here to watch it for you, but at the same point, I totally understand why it’s not something that you wanna go shout from the rooftops. But I bet if you bring it up to your mom community, your friend community, especially people who’ve had babies before, you’re gonna hear a lot of Oh, me too.

[00:17:07] Because it’s something that a lot of people feel, but we don’t wanna have it in the canals of time.

[00:17:12] Erin Galloway: Yeah, and I think there’s just unexpected things with pregnancy. Like don’t like being pregnant. I had very difficult pregnancies and so I wasn’t like joyful and happy. And I have friends who experience similar things and I’m like, it’s okay to not like being pregnant.

[00:17:29] That doesn’t make you a bad person. It’s really hard. It is really hard to be pregnant. It’s you’re growing a person, like taking all of you basically to do this while you’re also doing your other things. And so like it’s valid to not be totally like having this unicorn pregnancy where you’re like, I’m just glowing and all of this.

[00:17:48] And so I think part of that comes into that, of like grieving what you thought pregnancy would be like for you and what you had hoped you’d feel about it. That doesn’t mean you’re a bad person and you’re not gonna be an amazing mom. It just means that this is really hard.

[00:18:01] Hilary Erickson | The Pregnancy Nurse®: I would guess there’s absolutely no correlation towards like at a 5-year-old, like, ’cause we’re looking at kids when they have memories and they care about things. A five year old mom versus, comparing them to people who are excited about their pregnancy or loved their pregnancy versus people who didn’t.

[00:18:15] I bet there is no correlation between the two except for obviously socioeconomic issues or things like that. So, I know there were so many things that I was worried that my pregnancy would affect me moving forward and ultimately absolutely didn’t. I made way worse choices as a mom with teenagers than I did with those, so,

[00:18:34] Okay.

[00:18:35] So I wanted to talk about like, what are some other like areas that you notice people getting sort of caught off guard by the grief or stuff as they move forward through pregnancy and ultimately having the baby?

[00:18:46] Erin Galloway: I mean, I think after you come to terms with this is happening, this is my life right now. I think things can still shift in unexpected ways. And we’ve talked about this a little bit. You could be told that you’re high risk or that there’s some kind of complication, even if you’re a healthy person. Or you might experience a pregnancy filled with every single symptom imaginable. I had a friend that this happened to. And all I could just hope for for her is that like, man, I just want your birth to be so much easier than what your pregnancy has been. Because I’m just like, sometimes people get like every symptom imaginable and it can seem like at every appointment brings a new surprise and that. That like those surprises are considered quote unquote normal for pregnancy. I just saw something you had posted about that of like feeling like you’re just being told everything’s normal. Well, how do you actually process that and figure out like how to make it better for yourself too, because obviously our doctors can’t solve all of our problems.

[00:19:40] Like it’s, that’s the reality of pregnancy. And so I think when you’re experiencing unexpected things during pregnancy, you’re high risk. You have things that you didn’t expect to happen, that can still kind of catch you off guard. there’s just a lot of emotional ups and downs with that. I experienced that with my first pregnancy that it seemed like everything was going wrong with it. so it was hard to imagine that things weren’t gonna keep going wrong. ,

[00:20:09] Hilary Erickson | The Pregnancy Nurse®: And I think during pregnancy, it’s the first time a lot of people are managing healthcare in general because you’ve been a young, healthy person up until this point, and now all of a sudden, because pregnancy sort of ages your body like 20 to 30 years, just because of all the strain on it. And so suddenly you’re looking at healthcare like a 60-year-old versus a 30-year-old.

[00:20:28] And so it changes things night and day. And I’m here to tell you that, you know, after pregnancy, most often, you again are a healthy young person, but healthcare can be a lot during pregnancy that you weren’t prepared for.

[00:20:41] Erin Galloway: Super overwhelming. People don’t expect bills to come in. I remember I thought, oh yeah, like I’ll probably just have to pay my deductible. And no, I had to pay a certain amount for my prenatal visits and I didn’t expect that. If you’re not told, you’re not gonna know and if you don’t do the research. So, that was unexpected for me. I think relationships can be unexpected. People will continue to have responses for things that you don’t expect. Maybe this surprise you in a positive way, but sometimes it’s a negative thing. And so it’s just kind of processing that, figuring out what your relationships look like. Relationships change as you become a mom. I was one of the first people to become a mom in my friend group. And, so my kids have a lot of incredible aunts. But that was kind of an interesting transition of like, what priorities shift and you’re gonna see that. And, so that’s, I think, unexpected for people. And then, you know, when you get to the point where you’re having your baby. Your delivery, there are things that will probably come up that are unexpected for you. You haven’t experienced this before. and so that’s really hard. And then some things come up and you could have a traumatic delivery or a bad experience that you have to process and heal from. I think we talked about it a little when we were on the SheMight podcast that feeling like you’re not bonding with your baby right away or you don’t like immediately like feel that. And that’s kind of the expected thing. I think there are just so many things that come up in postpartum that think, oh, like we have this newborn bubble. And, it’s just gonna be wonderful. It can be really hard. It is really hard. Even if you’re having the best experience, it’s still hard because you’re learning how to take care of another human.

[00:22:16] And you’re taking care of your baby and navigating feeding and health and healing yourself. After a long nine months of pregnancy.

[00:22:26] It

[00:22:27] Hilary Erickson | The Pregnancy Nurse®: is a lot to take in. And I think the trap we get stuck in with these unplanned pregnancies is thinking that everyone else, everyone else is feeling something different than you. You know, they all. Immediately bonded with their baby. But because this was an unplanned pregnancy, I didn’t feel that rush of love right as they put baby on my chest.

[00:22:44] And I’m here to tell you that there is a wide variety of feelings, no matter how you got pregnant, if it was a, you know, an intended syringe pregnancy or an IVF, right? Where maybe it’s your sixth cycle and you’re just about ready to give up. All of these things have unplanned emotions about ’em, and everybody feels a different way.

[00:23:03] And I’m also here to tell you that as a nurse who sees people give birth in the labor room, when people call their sister an hour later with their birth story and I’m like cleaning up the placenta and all this different kind of stuff, when they tell the story, I’m like, well, that is not how that happened at all.

[00:23:18] They’ll be like, oh. It was like, absolutely. It was like, no pain at all. And I’m like, girl, you were pulling my hand off screaming. You know, an hour ago, and I’m like, that’s cool. Like, because we’re all just getting it filtered through people’s brains after the time has gone on. Most people don’t get to see, you know, that baby put right to chest or whatever.

[00:23:38] But as somebody who’s seen it thousands of times, I’m telling you there are thousands of different ways to feel of your baby, during pregnancy, after delivery, five years down the road. Yeah.

[00:23:49] Erin Galloway: Yeah. Well, and it’s incredible how our brain. Says like, oh, we’ll turn that piece off and that’s why we have more kids. It’s ’cause we forget about those really hard things and like you get to a point where you’re like, oh, I’m sleeping again. We could have another. And so it, it’s just, yeah, I think, yeah, you’re right.

[00:24:06] I think you, you’re going to grieve different pieces of your pregnancy experience or just have to process those things in those moments where it doesn’t feel joyful. It doesn’t feel like this is what you dreamed of, or you’re confused or fearful of something. Or sometimes it comes out that it brings up some past trauma or some stress that you’re experiencing.

[00:24:25] And I think that’s okay to have, and that’s why there are supports out there. That’s where there are mental health professionals that specifically work, with pregnant and postpartum women. And, that’s why, you know, there are communities out there so that you can put it online and say, Hey, you know, this is what I’m feeling.

[00:24:42] Does anyone feel the same? And feel like, oh, I’m not alone in this. Like I would say every single post that I see in our community, there’s at least one person that says, oh no, I felt that way too. Like that’s, it’s normal. I mean, you still need that support, but it’s normal. Like you’re not a bad person for feeling that way or having that emotion.

[00:24:58] Hilary Erickson | The Pregnancy Nurse®: And the other thing you had mentioned is to, you know, some people have a a positive reaction when you have your baby. They’re so excited for you versus the, and we’re always gonna glom onto the people that have the negative reaction, right? That’s what our brain is gonna fixate on, oh, she wasn’t happy for me, blah, blah, blah.

[00:25:13] But as a mom, the more we can get and like noticing when we have those positive things. Because as a new mom, young, I was like, I hate a lot of this. Right? But you know, all of a sudden we’d be dragging the wagon to the bookmobile and I remember thinking, this is what I always dreamed motherhood would be like.

[00:25:30] Right. And I was like, I have got to savor this moment because I didn’t think it would be smelling like spit up. I didn’t think that it would be so sleepless, so much crying from both the baby and me. And so noticing those positive times, can be super, super helpful. And of course that’s what people share on social media is them having that time where like, this is what I always thought it was gonna be.

[00:25:52] And that doesn’t, that’s one social media image in a lifetime of, man, this is way different and worse than what I thought it was gonna be.

[00:26:01] Erin Galloway: Yeah, I think we hear that a lot and I always tell people to try to like remember back to before you were pregnant, what are things that like brought you joy in those moments? If this, this current moment’s not bringing you joy in like a little bit of lightness, what are some things you can try? For me that was making sure that I was getting outside and going on walks, especially with my first ’cause I had pretty significant postpartum anxiety that I wasn’t acknowledging at the time, even though I work in this. And it took me probably a couple years to really acknowledge how deeply I was struggling. And so I think just remember those things that actually helped in the past, and try it. It never hurts to try it. It could not work and then you have to find something else. But yeah, my daughter is one in nine days and I’m in the space of like, oh my gosh, that really did go by like fast. Way faster than the first.

[00:26:51] I think it’s ’cause when you have a toddler and a baby, there’s like a million things happening. But, man, I’m looking back to this year and like remembering like, okay, this is, this is crazy how fast this went. And so it, it really is true. Like, I think you’re right, like trying to find those positive things, even taking one good win from the day or one positive thing that happened.

[00:27:10] Even if that’s something that seems silly, like, oh, I actually put the dishes away today from the dishwasher. Or I got outside, or I got dressed, took a shower, read a book. Like anything is a win in my book during that season. So take the steps to try to find those little things. And I think that can help you process those hard moments.

[00:27:30] True.

[00:27:30] Hilary Erickson | The Pregnancy Nurse®: I think that’s true, and I think a lot of times people are like, well, I can’t take the baby. I, I love to go on a walk, but I can’t take the baby. And I’m here to tell you that there is a lot that you can haul your baby with you, especially a walk. I mean,

[00:27:40] Erin Galloway: yeah.

[00:27:41] Hilary Erickson | The Pregnancy Nurse®: babies, love walks. So I’m here for that one.

[00:27:43] But if there’s something that you loved before, unless it’s like going to the ballet, probably don’t want to take your baby to that. There’s a lot that you can bring your baby to. You know, let’s say you loved going to the library, take your baby to the, the infant thing at the library. There’s so many things that you can bring your baby to, even though it’s gonna feel overwhelming, give it a shot.

[00:28:02] ‘Cause you sort of have to learn how to like, manage doing things with your baby. But there’s a lot you can do with your baby.

[00:28:08] Erin Galloway: Yeah. And I think learning how to best communicate. We have some really good communication tips, that we have on our website, like as a resource. But like it’s all in how you communicate because sometimes you may have a need and you’re not communicating it. To get the response that you actually need.

[00:28:25] So I think, being able to communicate well and we, like I said, I can send that downloadable too, like learning how to say things and being specific about what you need, in that season can help so that you’re able to get that support and that time to just find those wins and kind of take care of yourself.

[00:28:41] Hilary Erickson | The Pregnancy Nurse®: especially from a partner. Because the other thing is you’ve got this partner who’s grieving their life, right? And so both of you can be on a train to destruction together. And so, that gets extra tricky because it is definitely happening to both of you. And so, looking for outside supports, his mom, your mom, and allowing them to come help you out can be really helpful as well.

[00:29:03] Erin Galloway: Yeah. And if you don’t have that village, like I, I totally see that all the time is that families aren’t as nearby anymore. And so, yeah, that’s why sometimes it’s hard, but we have to seek out that village and that community. And there are a lot of great groups out there, all across the United States, that you can join. And you have to find what, like fits you, fits your background, your values, your needs. But there are people out there. And, there are online communities out there, whether that’s through social media or something like the SheMight Discord community, that is kind of a start to building that village

[00:29:34] Hilary Erickson | The Pregnancy Nurse®: So what can people get from SheMight? Tell us more about what you guys can offer to people if they’ve had an unplanned pregnancy or are just feeling the grief of like, suddenly this seems more unplanned than I thought it was gonna be. What can they get from you guys?

[00:29:49] Erin Galloway: Yeah, so SheMight started as an online blog basically. And so we have a resource library with over 150 articles and downloads that are just kind of to help you walk on your journey. So there’s different resources on there, from you know, Pregnancy stuff to maternity leave. We’re a go-to resource for maternity leave planning, and we would love to support in that.

[00:30:11] We do have a coaching program just to kind of support, helping through that unexpected pregnancy. And yeah, we have our online Discord community. It’s just kind of a space where you can engage with people kind of walking the same journey, share your experience, you know, build connections, ask questions. So that’s our online community. And, we have a couple new things that we’re launching soon we’ll be offering a grant program. Most of the women that we serve are, above the poverty line, and so they’re often not eligible for any government assistance. But we know that just because you’re above the poverty line doesn’t mean, that you don’t need some support and that one big expense can’t really break things for you. And so, we’re offering, a grant program coming soon to just kind of help make the early motherhood journey a little bit easier. And so, that information will be out soon. But yeah, we’re just a community on social media and discord that wants to kind of walk with people on their unexpected journeys.

[00:31:07] Hilary Erickson | The Pregnancy Nurse®: I think that’s so awesome. I’m gonna put links for you guys, in the show description or down below if you guys are watching on YouTube. But i’m so glad that we’re starting to have this conversation so that people can understand that what they’re feeling isn’t unusual. And they can look just like every other mom that they see at the playground.

[00:31:23] I think everyone envisions themselves as this person who just like Miss Hannigan from, Annie, who’s like “little girls. Little girls.” And that’s not gonna be the case. Those feelings are not gonna extend to every day for the rest of your life.

[00:31:34] Erin Galloway: Yeah. And the more we talk about it, the less shame there is to it. I always tell clients like, shame is the place you don’t wanna go. And so I think we can break the stigma around it and just talk about it and normalize it. Half of the pregnancies in the United States are unexpected. Like people can feel like, oh, I’m actually not alone in this.

[00:31:52] And know that like people are out there to kind of walk with you. And there’s more people out there that are experiencing this than you probably know.

[00:31:59] Hilary Erickson | The Pregnancy Nurse®: Yes. And even beyond that, there’s a lot of people who are like, oh my. Gosh, now I’m pregnant. Even if it was planned, they were off birth control. They were trying, they were, IV fing it. They were spending thousands of dollars for this baby. You can still have a feeling like, oh my gosh, what have I done to myself?

[00:32:17] Erin Galloway: I completely agree.

[00:32:18] Hilary Erickson | The Pregnancy Nurse®: Okay. Erin, thank you so much for coming on. I hope this information’s helpful for people. I hope people will reach out to SheMight ’cause I think that’s such a valuable opportunity. And best of luck to you guys moving forward. I hope that this just grows and grows and people can learn that they’re not alone.

[00:32:33] Erin Galloway: Yeah. Thank you so much for having me. It’s been an honor.

[00:32:35] Hilary Erickson | The Pregnancy Nurse®: Okay. I hope you guys enjoyed that episode. I just think people need to understand how many people have these same feelings. And like I said before, we’re not talking about them because it’s not something we really want our kids to end up knowing later on, which I totally understand, but that doesn’t mean that we can’t talk about it in private, even if we’re not sharing it on social.

[00:32:53] So check out SheMight. It sounds like they have so many good resources for you guys. I’m grateful that we have companies like them that can help us out.

[00:33:00] We’ll see you next time on the Pullling Curls podcast.

[00:33:02] Thanks for joining us on the Pulling Curls podcast today. If you like today’s episode, please consider reviewing, sharing, subscribing. It really helps our podcast grow. Thank you.

Keywords:

unplanned pregnancy, unexpected pregnancy, perinatal mental health, emotional response to pregnancy, pregnancy grief, ambiguous loss, disenfranchised grief, perinatal mood disorders, maternal anxiety, postpartum depression, pregnancy community support, partner reactions, family reactions to pregnancy, pregnancy and career, maternity leave planning, pregnancy timeline, birth control failure, high risk pregnancy, pregnancy symptoms, prenatal class, pregnancy and identity, adjusting to motherhood, parenting support groups, pregnancy support communities, online pregnancy resources, She Might, Pulling Curls Podcast, Pregnancy Nurse, relationships during pregnancy, financial concerns with pregnancy, pregnancy after infertility

The post Unexpected Pregnancy: You’re Not Alone – Processing Grief and Finding Support appeared first on Pulling Curls.

This is a perfectly normal response to a big task.

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One Step at a Time

Don’t wait for the perfect day. Don’t wait to “feel ready.”

I hear from far too many people who “don’t know where to start” – and want me to tell them that perfect process to get it done. But, I’m here to tell you….

Start with ten minutes.
Start with one counter.
Start with what you can.

And if you’re ready for someone to walk you through the rest — with grace, structure, and a system that actually fits your real life — join me inside The Organized Home.

You don’t have to do this alone anymore.
You just have to start.

Join The Organized Home →

The post When Your Mess Feels Too Big to Start: The first 10 minutes that changes everything appeared first on Pulling Curls.