Hello. No time for introductions. Me Seth. You reader. Go.
15. Now that the Duke kids are innocent, Jackie Robinson has been honored, and Don Imus fired, can we go back to pretending race doesn't matter in American sports?
14. The Evil Empire is crumbling.
13. Manny is still being Manny, except now he's Manny Alexander. (Hitting .194 with no power.)
12. Through five percent of the season, Alex Rodriguez is the front-runner for the AL MVP and Felix Hernandez has passed Johan Santana as favorite for the AL Cy Young.
(Don't tell me early stats don't mean anything. No matter how early in a developing situation, initial results are always the prelude to the rest of the story. If you look hard enough, you can gain meaningful knowledge about the future to come. Early stats certainly aren't the whole story, but they are definitely the first paragraphs, going on the first chapter.)
11. RIP, Kurt Vonnegut. Every writer hopes his work is good enough to remain alive past his own days on this planet. Vonnegut accomplished that. That's as big a compliment as I can give (even though he would probably tell me to shove it up my ass).
10. Farewell, Drew Bledsoe. You've been the consummate pro your whole career. You can go on with the rest of your life knowing you did it the right way while it was yours to do. I've said it before and I'll say it again: I'm glad the Pats took you instead of Rick Mirer.
9. Bad news for Dolphins fans: all four of Miami's road games in November and December are in cold-weather climates: Philly on Nov. 18, Pittsburgh on Nov. 26, Buffalo on Dec. 9, New England on Dec. 23.
8. Speaking of the Dolphins, am I the only one who thinks the return of Ricky Williams is getting short shrift? This was a top headline for the past two years, and now it's barely on radar. Even as a Pats fan, I'm excited about it. He's my pick for Comeback Player of the Year next season.
7. The Jets have the toughest schedule of them all next year.
6. Funny seeing Pacman Jones interviewed at a "Friday Night Fights" event featuring Zab Judah. It was Judah's first fight after a one-year suspension for his involvement in the riot during the Floyd Mayweather fight last year. Dude, what part of "don't put yourself in places where bad things can happen" do you not understand? Hanging out with Judah's entourage — Jones was there to support Judah, so you know they were hanging out — does not qualify as "being more careful." Jumping Jesus on a Pogo Stick!
5. I still haven't watched a playoff hockey game, and I think I know what's to blame — TiVo. See, TiVo has allowed me to get more involved in far more shows than a few years ago. My wife can watch "American Idol," but I can just record "NCIS" or "The Unit" and watch them later. I can still watch the best of Spike TV ("The Shield," UFC stuff), but don't have to miss network programming to do it. Add in the fact that I watch baseball live most nights, then fit in the rest of my shows when I can, and where is the time for hockey or the NBA?
4. Speaking of the UFC, there's a big treat for fans this Saturday night. UFC 70 will be available free in the U.S. on Spike (though still on PPV abroad). It should be a good set of fights, featuring Mirko Cro Cop vs. Gabriel Gonzaga, plus Andrei Arlovski and Michael Bisping, so if you've been waiting for a chance to get into MMA and haven't wanted to fork down the $40 for a PPV card, this is your chance. If you like to watch people beat each other up, you absolutely, positively havento get into the UFC.
3. It seems everybody is going to make a big deal about Barack Obama leading the fundraising race. Let me put it this way: Obama right now is the underdog team in the NCAA tournament, nailing threes from all over the place, getting every lucky bounce and generally playing out of their asses. Except they only have a two- or three-point lead going into half-time. And you know there's virtually no way they can keep up the pace. Nobody shoots 65% from three the whole game. Eventually, the ball will bounce the other way, and, when it does, the two-seed is going to put on a 15-2 run before you can say "remember Whitewater?"
Then again, upsets do happen. Perhaps Obama has some Harold Arceneaux in him.
2. Ted Ginn, Jr. to the 49ers at No. 11. You heard it here first.
1. Don't snort Ritalin.
Seth Doria is a blogger and freelance writer in St. Louis. For more news and notes on sports, politics, and Rick Ankiel, please visit The Left Calf.
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