Reflecting on the requirements of the audition, I felt I had two worthwhile monologues to present, but not a good third–an appropriate dramatic Shakespearean monologue. So, with 36 hours to go I set to work identifying, committing to, cultivating, and memorizing one that was suitable to the occasion. Is this nuts? Yes. Would I recommend such a challenge to anyone? No. Why did I do it? Because (1) I figured it was likely this group would want to hear a Shakespearean selection, and (2) I really love Shakespeare’s ... Read more »]]> One week ago I took a chance–a risk–one I might not recommend to everyone. I was called, you see, about ten days ago to audition for a highly-regarded theatre company. That phone call made my day wonderful because I had submitted my materials and a polite note with no expectation of being invited to audition. Perhaps the first lesson of this tale (and of many others) is: bar any sense of expectation one may have as it relates to anything. Then, one may be continually surprised.

Reflecting on the requirements of the audition, I felt I had two worthwhile monologues to present, but not a good third–an appropriate dramatic Shakespearean monologue. So, with 36 hours to go I set to work identifying, committing to, cultivating, and memorizing one that was suitable to the occasion. Is this nuts? Yes. Would I recommend such a challenge to anyone? No. Why did I do it? Because (1) I figured it was likely this group would want to hear a Shakespearean selection, and (2) I really love Shakespeare’s language. I find it interesting, insightful, economical, witty, tactile, engaging, illustrative, creative, concise, and brilliant. It’s easy to read, enjoyable to experience, and truly some of the best, most inspired writing of the age.

After identifying a satisfactory monologue, I regaled friends with my memorizing shtick over an impromptu dinner gathering. “What does that mean?” asked one, inquiring about a particular passage. This is the beauty of Shakespeare’s language: it can carry multiple meanings. Some are oblique, some obvious, some explicit, and others expository. But never derelict or slipshod is Shakespeare. Though he wrote for a common audience, he never doubted their intellectual capacities or catered to their lack of formal education. He had faith in his audiences’ abilities to comprehend and appreciate his artistic tales. At any point in the day–in public or in private–when I had two minutes, I found myself muttering lines to myself. This was a major league audition and I certainly didn’t want to damage the occasion by presenting myself as unprepared, especially if they asked for this specific monologue.

The afternoon of the audition, I arrived quite early, checked in with the monitor, and said I would find a quiet corner and wait until called.  Forty minutes later he came around to inform me I had seven minutes. I focused on breathing and the breath, a few quick utterings of individual passages, and before I knew it, I was entering the audition space. The director made introductions all around, reviewed my résumé, and inquired about my selections.  I indicated I had prepared three and listed them. Wouldn’t you know it? The Shakespearean monologue was requested first, followed by a contemporary, comedic choice. So, I did my best, presenting the interpretation I had worked so hard on. I’m not shy to admit I had one unintended pause. Pregnant? It seemed like ages, but perhaps it was not so long as that. I do hope it was construed as intentional. While the delivery of that phrase was not as rehearsed, the moment did make for exciting anticipation I think. The second piece went well and I was ushered out with “Thank you very much for coming” and “We are so pleased you were able to make it in today.”

I’m proud to say I did it! My reward in this instance is a Shakespearean monologue learned in short time that I feel confident about and relish.  Certainly, I will continue to refine and perfect it, and I do anticipate using it again. The second lesson of this experience? Nothing is impossible if you put your mind to it. And thirdly: find accomplishment and reward by meeting risk unabashedly and directly. How will we know our own limits if we do not test our boundaries? View every interaction as an opportunity to grow, and every experience as a gift presented by Tyche.

In every performer’s heart is harbored secret loves and passions–those so-called “dream jobs”–and in my case, this pilot captured a few of these elements: accents, intrigues and period costumes. As much as I’ve tried to sweep last week’s experiences from my mind, these past few days I’ve found myself pondering reflectively and questioning introspectively: “Oh, I could ... Read more »]]> Earlier today I queried, “Why is hindsight 20/20″? You see, I’ve had difficulty abiding by my personal tricolon recently: I go, I do it, I leave. Specifically, I have had difficulty failing to recall two auditions I had last week.  They were callbacks for roles in a TV pilot–my first auditions for a pilot since I worked as quirky teacher Jenn on The Six Fifty-Seven, a tale of commuter train pals. Fundamentally, every audition is a chance to work and, like all actors, I enjoy working as often as possible. Surely, it is foolish to dream of landing every gig, but it is reasonable to believe the possibility of working periodically with some regularity is feasible.

In every performer’s heart is harbored secret loves and passions–those so-called “dream jobs”–and in my case, this pilot captured a few of these elements: accents, intrigues and period costumes. As much as I’ve tried to sweep last week’s experiences from my mind, these past few days I’ve found myself pondering reflectively and questioning introspectively: “Oh, I could have delivered this line like this! That phrase could have been turned in this way, and why didn’t I try that? What must they think of me?!”

How does one stop putting all eggs in the same basket? Is it done by auditioning more frequently? Or by caring less about each opportunity? I certainly do my best to cultivate as many auditions for myself as possible, so that’s about all I can do on that front. Objectivity is a construct upon which my practice is found, so I try to care enough but not overwhelmingly so.

Why do I care at all? Is it selfish to want work that accesses those skills I most enjoy using? Is job appeal solely rooted in the relation between one’s likes and desires, and the potential of the gig? I always want to do my best so I showcase my ability, my creative intelligence, the skill of the casting director and my potential contribution to the final product. Could I be excessively evaluating the event?

Actor David August responded quickly to my tweet, saying, “it is so we can hone our foresight”, and in doing so he truly struck the nail on the head. Hindsight can be a very useful and instructive tool if approached as one, and often I do my best to take what I learn at each audition and improve my own technique, approach and output. In this instance, I know know more about one particular method of auditioning as well as another approach to preparation.

But will it ever be enough? Where lies that seemingly ephemeral intersection of desire, skill, appeal and opportunity? Where rests the balance between risk and reward? As I reported at the time, I did the best I could and that is all one can ever do. Learning to assuage my sense of un-fulfillment seems to be a skill I must still adopt.

So this year I am making a pledge to myself to work daily at being the best person I can be. There is an expression I like and is paraphrased, “Imagine life as you wish it to be and trust in the knowledge the Universe will provide it for you.” While I like it very much, I acknowledge I haven’t always believed it. However, I can cite examples in which actions undertaken with belief in such a concept have led to desired results.

One story that ... Read more »]]> I have never been one to make resolutions at the turn of a new year. The words “resolve” and “resolution” for me immediately call to mind music theory analyses of great compositions–specifically works by Wagner, Berg and Schönberg, among others. I’ve always felt trite commitments such as “lose weight”, “quit drinking” and “get organized” carry with them negative connotations that attract unwanted energy and undesired outcomes. They also bear heightened expectations that go frequently unmet and can lead to feelings of dissatisfaction.

So this year I am making a pledge to myself to work daily at being the best person I can be. There is an expression I like and is paraphrased, “Imagine life as you wish it to be and trust in the knowledge the Universe will provide it for you.” While I like it very much, I acknowledge I haven’t always believed it. However, I can cite examples in which actions undertaken with belief in such a concept have led to desired results.

One story that comes to mind details a friend’s experience. At her college, there was a policy through which students could select their senior dorm rooms at the conclusion of their junior years based on a lottery system. Of course, those whose names were drawn sooner in the lottery had more dorm room options from which to choose. So, my friend and her roommate put their names into the lottery at the beginning of their junior years and made a pact that they would engage in courteous, helpful actions throughout the academic year with the intent that their names would be drawn at the outset of the lottery. As the months passed, they held open doors, assisted others, and were charitable and obliging in all actions–all with the unspoken desire that they wanted great placement in the dorm room lottery. And you know what? When it came time for the lottery, their names were drawn first! They got to live in the room of their choice for their senior years. My friend and her roommate imagined life as they wanted, trusted that the Universe would provide it for them, and it happened.

In making a pledge to work daily at being the best person I can be, I am doing so imagining the life and career goals I wish to achieve in 2012, and believing the Universe will provide them for me.

Wishing you health, joy, and much success in 2012!

agent: an individual who, through contractual agreement, is empowered to act on behalf of another such as an actor, singer, dancer, writer or other talent, and who coordinates auditions, call backs and meetings with casting directors, producers and production companies, serving as a representative on the part of the individual signed to the contract. The agent often collects a percentage of the earnings of the individuals whom they represent.

casting director: the person responsible for identifying and selecting actors, singers, dancers or others for roles in a film, play, television show, commercial, or other production. S/he is typically hired by a producer and/or production company to conduct auditions of talented individuals and suggest or appoint people for those roles to be filled.

casting agency: a company, often a collection of individuals, that specializes in identifying people with specific talents in various fields, including acting, singing, dancing, modeling, hosting, and others. A ... Read more »]]> During the last few weeks, I’ve overheard some folks misusing terminology, so I thought I would offer an informal glossary for all to reference.

agent: an individual who, through contractual agreement, is empowered to act on behalf of another such as an actor, singer, dancer, writer or other talent, and who coordinates auditions, call backs and meetings with casting directors, producers and production companies, serving as a representative on the part of the individual signed to the contract. The agent often collects a percentage of the earnings of the individuals whom they represent.

casting director: the person responsible for identifying and selecting actors, singers, dancers or others for roles in a film, play, television show, commercial, or other production. S/he is typically hired by a producer and/or production company to conduct auditions of talented individuals and suggest or appoint people for those roles to be filled.

casting agency: a company, often a collection of individuals, that specializes in identifying people with specific talents in various fields, including acting, singing, dancing, modeling, hosting, and others. A casting agency, sometimes lead by a single or “name” casting director, is often hired by a producer or production company when large groups of people or multiple individuals need to be located for commercials, films, television programs, and other media.

manager: a person who, through contractual agreement, manages business, financial, and contractual matters on behalf of an actor, model, singer, performer, writer or other talent, often using the wisdom of experience to guide and shape the career of the individual signed to the contract. The manager often collects a percentage of the earnings of the individuals whose careers they manage.

paymaster: one who is officially responsible for processing payments to talent for their work performed under contract. S/he may be part of a production company, or a separate entity hired by the production company to ensure accurate wage payments are made, according to contractual agreement, as well as assuring proper witholding of taxes and fees.

producer: one who is responsible for the financial and managerial aspects of a film, play, opera, television program, musical, recording, or other form of news or entertainment.

production company: an entity, often lead by a director or producer, responsible for the production of a musical, film, opera, play, television program or other form of media. Please view the definition at wikipedia which is quite thorough. It is this entity that renders payment for an actor’s, singer’s, dancer’s or other talent’s work performed under contract.

union or labor union: a formally organized association of workers gathered to protect and further their rights and interests, often through contractual negotiation with producers, ensuring safe and equitable working conditions, and a dependable, reasonable wage. Common unions of the performing arts include: Actors’ Equity Association (AEA or “Equity”); American Guild of Musical Artists (AGMA); American Guild of Variety Artists (AGVA); Screen Actors Guild (SAG); and the American Federation of Television and Radio Artists (AFTRA). Members of unions are considered professionals of their crafts and pay a percentage of their earnings as dues annually to maintain memberships in good standing. In addition to an initiation fee paid at the time of joining, members of unions agree to work only under the terms of union-negotiated contracts.

This, too, is frequently the pattern for performing artists. We ... Read more »]]> As a witness to the state of the economy these past three years, I feel confident saying the American unemployed now understand what it is to be a performing artist. I hear from friends who are responsible for hiring at various companies that for every position they list on a job board or employment web site, they receive hundreds, if not thousands, of submissions during the first 24 hours, many of which come from people who are “highly overqualified” for the role. More importantly, they say it is nearly impossible to objectively review and assess every application for employment and its associated materials. For those who have made application, I’m certain they are constantly wondering, “How can I set myself apart? How can I get my foot in the door? How can I get the job?” I am also certain they find it spirit-crushing to repeatedly receive no response confirming their application, and never receive a request to interview, much less a job offer.

This, too, is frequently the pattern for performing artists. We actively seek employment opportunities, submitting our résumés and headshots for auditions whenever and wherever possible. Some may receive requests for auditions; many will not. A small number may be called back for second auditions; most will not. And we all ask ourselves, How can I set myself apart? What distinguishes me from other actors or singers or dancers? How am I unique yet ubiquitously appealing?

Yesterday, a friend of mine remarked, “You’re wonderfully positive all the time. It’s incredibly refreshing!” I thanked him for the compliment and observed that “I believe focusing on the positive attracts more positive energy and, therefore, more success.” However, I must admit I, too, experience my own periods of self-doubt, introspective inquisitiveness and uncertainty. I recall an audition I participated in just a week ago. I had arrived early, materials in hand, and was ushered into the audition space almost immediately. I greeted everyone warmly and gave a flawless TelePrompTer read on the first take, script never before seen. I left feeling quite confident in my performance. Unfortunately I didn’t get the gig, though I learned of two friends who did. While I’m genuinely happy for them, I cannot help but ask myself, Is it because I wore a cardigan instead of a suit jacket? Is it because my hands were frigid during introductory handshakes, a result of waiting 30 minutes outside for a bus? Is it because my possibly aloof appearance was rooted in the fact I was chilled to the bone? Was it my hair?

Inquiries like these inevitably lead to an assessment of the broader questions listed above: “How can I set myself apart? What distinguishes me from other actors, singers, and dancers? How am I unique yet ubiquitously appealing?” Truthfully, I do not know that I can ever answer these questions, because those facts I perceive to be hurdles aren’t true problems. They’re simply insoluble truths:

1. I’m a Caucasian. There is nothing I can do to mask this fact. I will never in any way represent other groups that are so often underrepresented, including Hispanics, Asians, Pacific Islanders and African-Americans. Caucasian is not a casting advantage.
2. I’m an American. I’m very American. I’m umpteenth-generation American. I’m not an immigrant, a first-generation American or even a second-generation American, characteristics which many times lend themselves desirably to roles and parts and marketing. I am one-sixteenth Native American, but since I in no way appear Native American, I will never be considered such. American can be less desirable.
3. I’m a female. While being female is a potential advantage in many male-dominated facets of corporate life, particularly in those areas in which women have historically been slighted, financially or otherwise, gender is not a leveraging asset in performance fields. There are a-gajillion females pursuing performance. How is my femininity any different from that of another female, without scrutinizing my physical assets or liabilities?
4. I’m heterosexual. I’m not homosexual, transsexual or transgendered. I’m straight, which is not a current hot-button selling point for casting directors; they prefer to have the “real thing”. But I can plausibly play any of these. When will I have a chance to show it?

While I may never be anything other than a straight, Caucasian, American female, I am highly well-trained, speak multiple languages, produce excellently convincing accents, sing very challenging music, and studiously prepare for every part and performance, no matter the role. When will talent be the selling point that supersedes those obstacles of fact enumerated above? This question explains why my personal tricolon–I go. I do it. I leave.–is so important to me: it encourages me to continually look forward to the next opportunity, squandering little time pitying what might have been.

As my father is fond of observing, looking for work is a full-time job. That’s why I’m a professional auditionee. It is my hope that those who are currently unemployed find comfort in the fact that they are not alone.  I ask them to look to an artist, for we have the compassion to sympathize with your condition, the experience to empathize with your situation, and the wisdom to know when perceptions change, opportunities arise.

The audition being almost-last-minute, immediately I got underway with preparations. It was evident which character I should prepare, so coordinating the various physical accoutrements was simple. However, it being awhile since I’d used the accent in question, I knew I needed to hit the books, as it were, hard. I began by reciting everything in sight. Bills. The label on my wood furniture polish. Magazine blurbs. Any commercial text I heard. And the instructions of the pasta recipe I made for dinner. One of the most important aspects of acting with an accent (besides producing it correctly) is making it appear effortless.  There ... Read more »]]> It doesn’t happen often that I have an opportunity to audition in an accent or language other than straight-up-neutral-American. However, I was pleasantly surprised to have an almost-last-minute invitation to an audition requesting an accent I actually know and perform well.  (Unlike those auditions at which I am instructed to put-on an accent I do not know, cannot perform, and which remains unlisted on my résumé for good reason.)

The audition being almost-last-minute, immediately I got underway with preparations. It was evident which character I should prepare, so coordinating the various physical accoutrements was simple. However, it being awhile since I’d used the accent in question, I knew I needed to hit the books, as it were, hard. I began by reciting everything in sight. Bills. The label on my wood furniture polish. Magazine blurbs. Any commercial text I heard. And the instructions of the pasta recipe I made for dinner. One of the most important aspects of acting with an accent (besides producing it correctly) is making it appear effortless.  There are numerous skills we each use daily that require little or no effort because we employ them often. Speaking in a accent or language other than one’s own is not natural or usual and, like learning a foreign language, immersion within the culture and people is best. Since a speedy international flight was a bit beyond my budget and timeframe, I made do, bringing the immersive experience to my apartment through foreign media, foreign films and non-American music (and lots of talking to myself.)

With immersion my focus, I arrived at the audition completely engaged and I enjoyed every moment. “Wow”, one individual remarked, “Your accent’s really good.” I thanked him and explained that I genuinely love accents and that–once fully engrossed–the intonations, inflections and associated idiomatic mannerisms become as first nature to me, requiring little effort. In the audition, I was fortunate to be able to flex my improvisation skills, too, and I hope they left a good impression. As with all auditions, the question is begged: What was the outcome? And, as with nearly all auditions, I do not know. I’ve gone, I’ve done it and I’ve left.  I must no longer be concerned with the potential result.  (But, secretly, I’d love to work on the project and I don’t think all the casting has been finalized.)