Earlier this morning, someone sent me a link to this site, where a movie blog talks about me and the movie. The relevant excerpted part:

"Hey, Paulington!

I am a huge, HUGE fan of Tucker Max and his book I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell. From what I understand, and gather from your very own site, a movie based on this amazing novel is coming to theaters on September 29th of this year. But you haven't run any coverage on it whatsoever. What gives? I'd expect more from the best movie site on the planet. You suck.
Signed - "Tucker's Bitch""

Dear Bitch. You haven't seen anything on our site about this movie because Freestyle Releasing, the company throwing it into theaters, hasn't offered us any promotional material yet. And we generally don't do advanced reviews. If you want to learn more about the film you can visit Tucker Max's world-renowned website. Apparently, the film is completely finished and is currently being taken on a U.S. tour of college campuses, where it should play in spades throughout August and early September. To find a list of towns, again, check his website. The film was directed by Bob Gosse, who doesn't really have anything substantial under his belt worth mentioning here. Max wrote the screenplay with his buddy Nils Parker, so you can expect something in tone with what you read in the book. The author has a unique and breezy way of writing that doesn't allow you to escape his prose. He's a natural, with a god given talent. Sure. But if you've read I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell, you'll know that most of his stories go nowhere, and they have little in the way of a structural arc. If you pick up a copy to see what all the fuss is about, you're sure to put it down, bewildered by its lack of heart. "How the heck did they make a movie out of this?" Well, that's where Nils come in. Together, they've pulled the most obnoxious, laugh-tinged moments from the narrative and strung them into a road trip plot about a bachelor party. Early word of mouth is that while it's pretty darn funny, it could wind up languishing on video store shelves just like Elizabeth Wurtzel's Prozac Nation. If Freestyle is smart, they will certainly try to play off the success of this summer's The Hangover. Some audience members, unfamiliar with Max and his energetic prose, may see it as a less than worthy rip-off. Matt Czuchry, best known for his time on Gilmore Girls and Friday Night Lights plays Max in the film. Why? Because Tucker stated in an interview that he didn't have the talent to pull off the performance himself. In Tucker's lastest blog update, he says that he doesn't like the upcoming trailer, and that it didn't make him want to see the movie. At all. I like that he's being entirely honest, and a book about the production of the film, no matter how good or bad it is, will more than likely be an exceptional read worth any Cinephile's time. I, myself, can't wait to see the finished film. I hope it's entertaining. But if not, oh, well. Sometimes, as evident by this month's I Love You, Beth Cooper, a great comedic novel simply doesn't work well on screen. Words and film. They are two different mediums. Sometimes, they don't jive in context of one another. And its hard to capture a very personal voice on screen. Rest assured, though, we will more than likely be covering I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell the closer we get to a release date. If any college students have seen the film, write in and let me know what you think. I will post your thoughts here in a follow-up.

I wasn't pissed at the dude for all the things he got wrong, just confused. So I sent him this email in response:

From: tuckermax@gmail.com
To: heypaulington@movieweb.com
Date: Fri, Jul 3, 2009 at 12:53 PM
Subject: Dude, just come to the source

I appreciate you writing about the movie, but here is what I don't
understand: You claim you don't have any info on the movie because
Freestyle hasn't sent you any, but then you link my site. If you know
enough to read the blog, why would you not just email me directly and
ask me any question you want? I am nothing if not accessible and
self-promoting, and there is a contact form on the site that goes
directly to me.

Let me clear some things up for you:

-I not only wrote this movie with Nils, we produced it. Not "we got a
producer credit" produced it, but we were the only producers--aside
from Sean McKittrick--who have been involved in every single step of
this process. Good or bad, it is our creative vision.

-You are absolutely right to question how the book will translate into
a movie, especially because the book doesn't have a coherent
narrative. We realized this early on, and focused intently not only on
the humor--which was easy--but on making a MOVIE, which means having a
great story. I think we pulled it off, but at the very least, know
that we understood this going in.

-Please don't say things like "If Freestyle is smart", etc--it makes
the wrong implication. Freestyle is one of the distributors, but not
in the normal sense. With most movies, the distributor owns the movie
and makes the creative decisions about marketing and promotion. Not
really the case here. All the creative decisions--trailer, poster,
marketing, etc--are being made by me, Nils, and the Darko team, with
our distribution partners adding input and helping us execute our
plan. Succeed or fail, it's on us, not the distributor.

-When I said the trailer stunk, I was talking about the first draft of
the trailer. First drafts of everything stink. Please do not think
this first draft will EVER been seen by anyone outside us and the
trailer house. We won't release anything until we get a version we all
like and agree on.

-The Premiere Tour is not going on now. It starts in late August, and
runs up until the release. We will finalize the schedule by July 10th,
hopefully.

-BTW, the release date is September 25th, not September 29th.

-When you haven't seen the movie, speculating about what the movie is
like by relying on nebulous and inaccurate rumors is unproductive,
especially when there is already a review out there by another
professional reviewer that was at an early screening.

-Beyond that, I have listed a ton of reviews from other people who
have seen the movie on my site, for example.

-But there is no reason to listen to anyone else--you are of course
welcome to come to any screening you want. As soon as we lock the
Premiere Tour schedule down, I will email you and invite you whichever
screening is closest to where you live. I think this movie is awesome,
and all the early feedback has confirmed this, so I am more than eager
to get it in front of as many eyes as possible.

There are a ton of other things I could address, but they are minor,
so whatever. In the future, if you have any question or want any info,
just come directly to the source: tuckermax@gmail.com. I know this is
a novel thing for movies, and no other film companies run their
projects this way, but we are different.

I am not trying to shit on Paulington at Movieweb or single him out at all. He seems like a good guy and at least makes an effort to get shit right, which is better than most movie writers, but he is still doing what everyone else does--making assumptions and speculation instead of actual reporting.

This has been a systematic issue with all movie sites--none of them ever go to the source for any information. It is mind-boggling to me. Virtually site I have seen does little more than post ridiculous speculation, baseless rumors, and random ranting. The only "news" they ever post, they get directly from either Variety or THR or some other MSM source. Aside from Ain't It Cool News, I can't think of a time I've seen any site doing any original reporting or checking of sources.

I mean--my production blog has been up for over a year. I have my email listed on my site. I have responded to tons of questions from fans in the past. Why do NONE of the movie blogs ever think to actually ask me? Or really--why do they not go to the source for any movie? It's not just me, they do this to everyone.

Maybe it's because everyone else in the movie business is so secretive and anti-press and afraid of the internet, I don't know. Maybe no one else in Hollywood has their contact info available. I don't know why, but I just can't understand this mindset of not checking facts and going to the source. Sometimes you can't get your news from the source, ok fine, but If you can, why would you not? If you can do original reporting and add value, why would you not? If you can bring something to the table aside from speculation, why don't you? If you can add value beyond the trades, why aren't you?

You know what is so funny about this? People quote Variety and THR like they are some sort of authoritative sources--people, do you have any idea how disreputable those publications are? They are so in the pocket of the big studios who buy ALL the advertising in them, it is ridiculous. And any entry level PR flack in Hollywood can get almost any story in them about anything at any time. And the stories you read by the Variety reporters--they are taken DIRECTLY from the press releases that the PR flacks, hired by the studios or production companies or agencies write. Almost every story on this movie in Variety or THR has been like 90% written by our publicists. This isn't some secret. The trade papers are shills for the industry. Everyone in Hollywood knows this...apparently except for the independent movie blogs.

There is a HUGE opportunity out there for someone to start a movie blog that, instead of regurgitating the same barely re-written Variety news, that is itself a barely re-written press release, actually does real reporting and uncovers original news and stories. Nikke Finke does it, and because of this fact, not only does EVERYONE in Hollywood read her, she just sold her blog for a reportedly 14 million dollars. ALL SHE DOES IS DO ACTUAL REPORTING AND SHE SOLD HER BLOG FOR 14 MILLION DOLLARS!!!! One woman.

Don't get me wrong--I read her blog, have profited tremendously from it, and she deserves her money. But why is NO ONE ELSE doing anything even remotely similar. All she writes about is the business of Hollywood--deals, firings, that kind of stuff. No one is doing what she's doing in terms of the art of Hollywood (that I know of, at least, though I guess maybe TheWrap--who just started--is trying to do that also).

Well, let me say this for everyone out there who wants to write about this movie:

I am ready and willing to truthfully answer any question you have about any aspect of this movie. My email address: tuckermax@gmail.com. Don't guess, don't speculate, don't make shit up. Just ask me. I'm right here.

Comment and discuss

-Trailer: I saw the second cut of the trailer yesterday. I didn't watch the first because Sean called me and told me, for my own mental health, to not watch it. He remembers how I reacted to the first time I saw the rough cut--it was not good--so I took his advice and waited for him and Nils to give their notes to the trailer company and watch the second cut.

We all saw the second cut yesterday, and I am glad I took Sean's advice on the first cut. The second cut was...it made me not want to see the movie, which is the worst thing a trailer can do obviously. It needs work.

Actually, that's false. It needs to be scrapped and completely re-conceptualized. The problem is that we tried to make a trailer like every other Hollywood comedy--meaningless cuts, goofy jokes, show the hijinks and get out--and that doesn't work with this movie because that is not at all what this movie is about. Not at all.

This is not a big deal, I know the material is there to make a kickass trailer, but we are going to have to really think about it and work on it, instead of just plugging scenes in the standard Hollywood comedy template. This is not a paint-by-numbers movie, so the standard way of doing things won't work most of the time.

All this means is that we probably won't have the trailer done by the time we were hoping. Sucks, but whatever, welcome to making movies. Nothing is ever on time. But it'll be up soon, I promise.

-Poster: No proofs yet. Will post my thoughts when they come in, then post the poster as soon as we finish it.

-Movie edition of the book: So this is kinda cool--my publisher decided to do a special "Movie Edition" of the book. It'll be the exact same stories, but the front cover will be the movie poster instead of me, and there will be a 16 page insert of color photos from the set. Plus Nils and I wrote like a one page introduction that was kinda funny. It'll be released in early September to coincide with the movie release, and will only have a limited run, like 30,000 copies or something, then in November or so we'll go back to the normal cover and shit.

It's nothing really new, so please don't be in a frantic rush to run out and buy it, but if you are into collectors items or shit like that, it would probably be cool to have. I'll post more about it when it's closer to release.

-New site: Carrot Creative is hard at work getting the new site together, we should have it up in a few weeks. Plus they are going to re-do the Facebook fan page, and the Myspace page. Lots of new features, plus it will feature the red-band trailer, so it should be cool.

-So get this: When you get your rating from the MPAA, they actually send you a signed, embossed and sealed form that says, in red print, what your rating is. Seriously, here is ours:

[Pic is redacted, per frantic email from Sean, via Darkos publicists. I wish I was kidding.]

I don't know why, but this certificate made me erupt in laughter.

[BTW--it says distributor "not set" because we submitted the movie for a rating like, four or five months ago.]

-The Premiere Tour: Our guy is hard at work booking all of our stops, and we have a conference call tomorrow to go over everything. It looks like we have a few cities we are going to have to skip because of various problems with finding an appropriate venue, but no big deal, we'll just replace them with other cities close by. As soon as we lock every stop down, we will start selling tickets, and YES, for the fourth time, people on the mailing list, and Facebook fans, and Twitter followers and MySpace fans will get first shot at tickets. So pick your permission asset and sign up now.

And good news: I think we found a way to hit the west coast in the later part of the tour, so it looks like we will be stopping in Tucson, Tempe, San Diego and LA, and maybe San Francisco and Seattle, all in late September. No promises, but we are trying to make it all work.

Comment and discuss

With this movie, and even with this blog, there are two different things going on simultaneously. The first and most obvious is that we are making a movie and promoting its release. And with that, the only thing that really matters is the movie itself, and whether or not the movie is enjoyable to the people who watch it. And make no mistake, that issue--making a great movie--is always at the forefront of our minds.

But for me personally, this whole undertaking has never been about one movie. Nothing I did on this movie--from the script, to the financing, to the casting, to the production, to the marketing--was done with one movie in mind. For over five years I have looked at this movie as the first major battle in the grand campaign to change the entertainment business. From day one, I have had a plan in my head about where I wanted to take this and how I wanted to get there.

Look at how Nils and I made this movie, the process we followed. We examined the "normal" Hollywood way of making a movie, found it to be stifling to creativity and utterly evil in how it treats artists, and consciously rejected it. Instead, we took another path:

We wrote a different way--not worrying about what would sell or what we were "supposed" to do, instead focusing on nothing other than what made the best movie.

We financed it the right way--turning down upfront money and guaranteed "success" so we could do the movie with a company who would respect our artistic vision and give us creative control.

We made it the right way--by hiring people who got our vision and wanted to do it the right way, not the "Hollywood" way.

And we are marketing it the right way--by engaging fans in the process, being completely honest with them, and always treating them the way we would want to be treated, instead of shilling and lying to them at every turn.

We may be right and win this battle, and it may launch us towards winning the whole war. We may be wrong, and lose this battle (or worse, we may be right and still lose). I have no idea what the next 88 days will bring, or how this movie's success will end up.

But, in the end, this is just one battle. The war is going on, all over the world, all around us at all times. No matter what I do or what this movie does, it is only one small battle in a much larger conflict. The world is changing all around us in fundamental ways, and for the first time in over a hundred years, the opportunity is there for the artist to free themselves from the tyranny of the 20th century corporate system, and to unleash their creativity, unbounded by anyone or anything else.

Look at these movies, supposedly the ten most profitable movies ever, in terms of ROI ratio. Do you notice the theme? Each one was revolutionary in its time, each one was a whole new take on some aspect of movie-making, each one was original and raw and authentic and each one was done...outside the system.

Or take this article, again from today, about how fucked up the old star system is and how audiences are craving originality and meaning. The curtain has been pulled back, and people aren't accepting mindless corporate bullshit anymore. They want value.

The world of art and entertainment is changing in front of our eyes. The shift in power from the middleman to the creator--in all fields of commerce actually, not just art--has begun, and the 21st century will be defined by this movement. Putting value back in the hands of the creators, after a century of robbing them, that is what the 21st century will be about, and we are witnessing the shift right now.

This may sound kooky to you, and if it does, that's fine. This post wasn't meant for you. It was meant for all those people out there who want to create, who want to do something excellent create value and make something that creates a better world in some way. I am telling you, right now, it can be done. For maybe the first time in history, the creator is free to be who they want to be, to create what they want to create, and to not have to answer to the interests or demands of the powerful, or of anyone but themselves.

Now, make no mistake--everything has a cost. Life is a tradeoff. It is not easy to be an artist or a creator. But look around. It can be done. You can do it, and you don't have to sell your soul or corrupt your self to do it. And every day it gets easier. If this movie succeeds the way I think it will, it will be one more brick off the wall. If not, no big deal, some other movie will come along and take that brick down.

But the wall is falling. One brick at a time, we are moving to a better system and a better world. Understand it, embrace it and reap the rewards...or be like the 20th century studio system, and watch yourself be slowly left behind.

EDIT: As soon as I post this, Umair posts something just like it, but better. He's right.

Comment and discuss

-We spent all day Friday doing the photo shoot for the movie poster, and then doing some ADR for the trailer. If I wasn't an idiot I would have taken my camera and taken pictures of both things, but whatever. If you've seen one photo shoot, you've seen them all. We should have proofs to look at for both next week, and as soon as we release either of them, the readers of this blog will be the first to know, I promise.

-I would like to thank everyone who sent us suggestions for Premiere Tour theaters in our screening cities (pursuant to the request in this post). We got a fucking crazy amount of email, and in the case of one city, it actually changed the tour.

I can officially announce that--barring some unforeseen problem--was are now adding Blacksburg, home of Virginia Tech University, to the tour.

We are doing this solely because of the crazy amount of response we got. We got at least 100 emails (and counting) just from people in Blacksburg and VaTech people. It was nuts. Penn State people and people from Toronto were #2 and #3 and sent a lot, but Blacksburg was first by a large margin. Don't worry UVa people--we are still keeping your screening, we are just going to find a way to fit Blacksburg in also.

I'll tell you what--if you are in a marginal city or one that we could conceivably hit but isn't on the tour, and you can muster a huge response, we might add your city too. It's not inconceivable, especially if it's a college town.

-I can finally announce this: We officially have our R rating from the MPAA. We actually had it like, two months ago, but I couldn't announce it because, irony of ironies, the cut we submitted to them and got an R rating for was TOO GRAPHIC for us, and we wanted a slightly toned down cut. Every change you make, even if you make the movie less graphic, has to be screened, so I had to wait until we got our final cut approved to announce it. But yeah, it's an R.

-To everyone asking where you can get tickets to one of the Premiere Tour stops--people, we have to finish booking the theaters and get the online ticketing system up. It's be like 2-4 weeks before the tickets go on sale, so just relax. Yes, we expect that they will sell out quickly, but I will give you plenty of notice before they go on sale, and all of you readers will get first crack at them, I promise.

-I know I have written before about how we try to do the right thing by our fans, and most Hollywood studios don't. Well, that is true, with the exception of Pixar. Those guys are awesome at everything.

-If you don't follow movie blogs, one of the best to read is Thompson on Hollywood. Anne Thompson is one of more level-headed and intelligent writers when it comes to giving perspective on the business of Hollywood, and she listed the six things this summers movies have taught us. Check out #1 and #3:

1. Originals sell. The very thing that the majors are most afraid of is what makes Pixar King of the Mountain, every single time: originality. While everyone else looks for easy-sell labels, Pixar relies on a very old-fashioned idea: make it good and they will come. Up scored not via marketing prowess, but through great word-of-mouth. Gross to date: $191 million and going strong. Heck yeah!

3. Smart R-rated dumb male comedies sell. Always have, always will. The Hangover is the summer's sleeper hit, grossing more than $110 million in its first two weeks.

Yep. Cannot agree more on both counts, which is one of the reasons I believe this movie is going to do so well--it is not only original in pretty much every important way, it is original within the confines of an established and successful genre: The R-rated male comedy.

I know I have said this like, 100 times before, but trust me: This movie is going to really, really well. It's the right movie at the right place and in the right time.

-This actually leads me to a point some people have asked me about: How similar is IHTSBIH to The Hangover?

I guess I can see why, if you only read the loglines, you might think the movies are similar. The Hangover is about three guys and what happens in the aftermath of a bachelor party in Vegas. IHTSBIH is about three guys who go on a bachelor party, and how that affects their friendships. OK fine, if you stop there, I guess they seem similar. But trust me on this: These two movies are about as different as two movies can be, while still being in the same basic genre (the R-rated male comedy). The Hangover is just like most all other Hollywood comedies, except its funnier. The piece of feedback we get the most consistently across all screenings is this, "I can't really describe this in terms of another movie--it's not like any other movie."

I don't want to get to much into the specifics of how the movies are different, because that will require me to disclose too many spoilers from IHTSBIH. But literally almost everything that can be different, is different. Some examples:

-Style of comedy: The Hangover is physical comedy highlighted by preposterous plot devices. IHTSBIH is dialogue based comedy highlighted by realism at every level.

-Story: The Hangover has a tenuous story that exists only to string a series of unrelated jokes together, and that climaxes in a pretty predicable way, dying at the end (except for the credits, which were awesome). IHTSBIH has a very meaningful and heartfelt story, with the best scene in the movie being the climax, that builds to an amazing finish (seriously Czuchry KILLS it in the last big scene).

-Cinematography: Without getting into technical details, the movies look and feel VERY different. Lighting, shot selection, blocking, even type of film is all different. When you see, you'll understand.

Those are just three examples of many, but the point is that the superficial similarities are really not significant; it's the differences that make the movies. It'd be like saying Ironman and The Dark Knight are the same because they are both superhero movies--that's preposterous. They were very different movies, even though both were the same general genre. Same here.

I know I am going to get this question too, so I might as well answer it: Yes, OF COURSE I think our movie is better than The Hangover. Way better. Of course, I am biased as shit, how could I not think that?

But to say that is not to try and put The Hangover down. It's a fine movie, probably one of the better comedies of the past ten years, and I even laughed a few times when watching it (I am a tough critic on comedies). And shit did Zach Galifianakis do a great job. Of course I have my issues with it, and I could outline them, but really, who fucking cares--it's a good movie, worth seeing, and I am very happy to see it do well. Check that--I am ecstatic to see that movie do well. It proved my point exactly--I wrote on here many times that a lack of big name stars are not needed to launch a great comedy, and that the market for good R comedy is huge, and The Hangover proved those points very right. It's success bodes extremely well for ours.

-Though, I can't talk about The Hangover without leaving you with this last tidbit:

Geoff Stults, one of the three leads in our movie, was also offered the role of the groom in The Hangover. He had both that offer and our movie's offer at the same time...and he turned down more money for The Hangover to do I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell. There was a reason for that.

It's not because The Hangover is a bad movie. Far from it--that movie is solid, and everyone knew it would do really well.

No, it's because ours was something different, something special, and he saw that.

And in 95 days (or less), you'll see for yourself.

Comment and discuss

I took a red-eye to NYC on Monday night, to do a screening on Tuesday afternoon for Carrot Creative. They are the elite design/development firm that is helping head up our internet/SMO strategy, and so I screened the movie for the entire firm. Maybe 40 people there, all creative types, it went great.

During the meeting afterwards, I had the weirdest thought--it was the first time I can ever remember being in a real, legit business meeting where I was the oldest person there. Their CEO Mike Germano is only 27 and one of those dudes who has done so much stuff in his life you start counting the years to see where he fit it all in--among other things, he's been a state representative in Connecticut and currently runs one of the best creative firms in the country, and he's fucking 27. I didn't even START writing until I was 27. Fuck overachievers.

Of course, he is Italian, so at least that provided hours of inappropriate and base ethnic humor for me to mine, e.g., "You're Italian? That can't be. You walk upright."

That night we all went out and got completely shit-canned. The two highlights (for me):

1. The model who came out to meet me with a copy of her latest four page photo shoot and accompanying interview (it was in some artsy French magazine). She pointed to a passage, and blushing heavily, asked me to read it. It was her gushing about how much she liked my book.

2. Her friend was even funnier than her. She was a model too, but not just any model. Nope, she was the type of model who goes out to bars in the east village in tight pink hot pants. I am not exaggerating one ounce. You could almost see her cervix through the camel toe they were so tight. She ended up going home with my buddy who is an ESPN writer (not Bill Simmons). I won't name him, he can tell the story himself in his column if he wants, but it was awesome because the week before he had a threesome set up with a porn star and some other girl, had them both IN HIS HOTEL ROOM, and blew it--didn't fuck either one! His confidence was shattered, so of course I called him Leon Lett all week.

But this night I told him, "Dude, just relax. Let your desire go, live in the moment, have fun, and the sex will happen on it's own. Chase it and it runs; let it come to you and you own it." He played it perfectly. It's awesome to see your students grow in front of your eyes.

The next day I opened my eyes at 7am and was immediately startled completely awake--my assistant Ian standing at the foot of my hotel room bed staring at me, "We have to catch a cab to LaGuardia." The kid is weird.

I took a flight to Ft. Bragg, North Carolina to screen the movie for [UNIT REDACTED]. The whole thing came together in such an impromptu way--a month ago I got this random email:

"Tucker,

I had an epiphany on my ride home today. I bet you get this all the time nonetheless I thought I would try it. So, I went home, and did what I always do when decision time comes around. I had a few beers to clear the mind and thought 'what the fuck', I guess it's worth a shot:

Would it be possible for soldiers from my [UNIT REDACTED] to enjoy a small screening of your upcoming IHTSBIH before [WE DEPLOY]? We're gonna miss the domestic premiere. I know I would rather watch such a highly anticipated film in a theater... rather than from my computer, in a sandy FOB, through a bootleg I'd purchase from the [LOCATION REDACTED] bazaar in three to four months.

Background: Our [UNIT REDACTED], (stationed in Fort Bragg) has [A BUNCH OF GUYS] that are deploying to [LOCATION REDACTED]. I am speaking for a lot of people that I am not really authorized to speak for, but I am sure there is a significant interest in your book and upcoming film amongst the lower enlisted soldiers as they fall under the target audience. I can only really speak for myself here, but I assume that these soldiers would be absolutely enthralled to enjoy a screening of your film prior to deployment in a packed theater. Though we are preparing to deploy and we are busy, I'd love to give the soldiers an opportunity to kick back and enjoy the film. I wouldn't mind working some logistics to make it happen. Who wouldn't want this epic film to screen at their theater?

My Story (blah blah blah who cares):

I was in the Infantry Officer's Basic Course in Georgia, prior to Ranger School, waiting to complete our final culminating mission when I was introduced to your genre of comedy. We were in a hanger at the airfield and I was bored out of my fucking mind. My friend from UT told me, "Hey dude, while we wait for this Blackhawk ride, why don't you check out this book?" Well, one and a half days later after reading this thing in the prone, on mission, while shooting aimlessly at the fake enemy, I finished I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell. I hadn't read a book so quickly since Goosebumps #28, the Cuckoo Clock of Doom, in 4th Grade. There was just something special about it that caused me to burn through it. As a 22 year old, the post grad time frame truly appealed to me and I related to every story. I was truly captivated by the book and filled with mischievous energy for some reason I couldn't put my finger on.

All stories aside, the book really gave me something in life. I had always been outgoing [INFORMATION REDACTED]. I saw your youtube video speech at OSU, which really tapped on about 25 percent of what I got from your book. I related to that. Following your true dreams is something difficult to do when groomed into a traditionally successful and respected profession. The other 75% that I got from your book is how to transfer a drab situation where traditionally fun activity is not likely into experiences that last a lifetime. In your case, this involved the University of Chicago or Duke Law School. In my case, Fort Bragg and Fort Benning served as barriers to wild social undertakings. Your book taught me that you could take a situation where individuals are supposed to be studious, reserved, respectful and cautioned against rambunctious activity and then tell that generally boring way of life to fuck off because you live only once.

Bottom Line: As Dewey Cox as this sounds, the book inspired me to live hard. Real hard. It inspired me to live as if there was no tomorrow and the dividends have paid off immensely.

This was just a shot in the dark before I deploy to see if I could see if I could yet again expand the narrow corridor of life, treat the soldiers to a fantastic night and add have more tremendous story to talk about in [LOCATION REDACTED] on a bitter cold night. I think I am in a position to pull some legwork behind this. I really think that if any of the dates work out, even weekdays, we could make this happen. If not, best of luck with the movie I can't wait to see it whenever that is. I am sure success will find you."

How the fuck could I say no to that?

I gave him my requirements, the type of projection system, the playback system, the size of the crowd, etc, and then I told him if he did all the legwork, made it essentially a plug and play event for me, I would fly out on my own dime and do it. Well, three days later he had it all set up. True to my word, I booked my ticket and last night we did the screening.

It went great. This was actually the first time we have screened the full cut for a big non-industry audience since the distributor screening, and it fucking rocked. Start to finish the crowd was totally into it, laughing at all the right places, standing ovation afterwards, it was just fucking awesome.

Then, after the screening, they surprised the shit out of me by giving me a gift. And not just any gift, look at this:

It is a silver flask with my name engraved on the front, and on the back is, "Thank you from the deploying paratroopers of [UNIT REDACTED]. [INFORMATION REDACTED]"

It's weird; we worked so hard and so long on the movie, I think sometimes I almost forget why we're doing it--not for the money or the fame or anything like that, but because there is nothing like seeing a crowd of people sit there for 99 minutes laughing their ass off at what you created, and walk away happy and thrilled and quoting the movie to themselves and their friends. To bring that sort of enjoyment to someones life is like no other feeling on earth. That is thanks enough, but then to get such a meaningful gift I mean, I mean, I don't even know what to say. I guess I can start with, "Thanks."

Though, the best part of the trip: I spent most of my time hanging out with [SGT J], one of the senior NCO's in the unit. He was supposed to be my escort while I was in Bragg, but it was leave for him not duty time, so he spent the whole time getting shitfaced, which meant I had to drive HIM around! Kudos to him for being vigilant against getting a DUI, but motherfucker! I'm staying sober and driving you around drunk? WTF??

Let me just say this: I would drink with those guys anywhere, anytime, [LT S, SGT J], and all the other guys who helped with the set-up and got smashed with us at Huske Hardware afterwards. Military guys are always great to hang out with; they are so appreciative of everything, they are respectful and they are fun as fuck. But this crew was even better than normal. A great night all around, the type of night that reminds me why I love my job so much.

Plus, they send the funniest emails. I got this as I was typing this post:

"i am a private in [UNIT REDACTED] and i just wanted to thank you for showing your movie to us, now i dont care if i die in [LOCATION REDACTED] because i have seen your movie, once again thank you and your movie kicked fuckin ass."

EDIT 1: I took video of last night, but like a moron I left my camera at [SGT J's] house. He's going to mail it to me, so I have no idea when I'll get it up.

EDIT 2: I guess I should address this because I know I will get questions about it: This was not necessarily a one time thing. If you are in a unit that is deploying prior to September 25th and you can completely organize the screening and guarantee a big crowd, I will try to find time to fly out to your base myself and screen the movie for you. And I will consider doing other screenings for military prior to the movie release even if the unit isn't deploying, given my ridiculous time constraints, just email me and we'll see what we can do.

EDIT 3: I had to redact some unit names and what not because of OPSEC reasons regarding deployment, etc. You know how the military is about that stuff, but it's fine, it doesn't change the meaning of anything.


EDIT 4: Ahh, isn't Deadspin cute? They try so hard to be cool.

But here's the funniest part, at least to me: They think they are intrepid reporters and have figured this out, and that it was Matthew Berry who was hanging out with me on Tuesday night. They even quoted one of Matt's tweets as proof. Way to get evidence guys! Fuck those people who make fun of you, you're just as good as the real press!

I do know Matthew Berry. We have hung out several times before, and he's has even seen my movie, BUT...it wasn't Matthew Berry I was out with on Tuesday night in NYC.

Here's the problem: That tweet was from June 10th. I was in LA on June 10th, hanging out with Matt. But Tuesday night was June 16th. I was in NYC and he wasn't there. I do have so funny stories about hanging out with Matthew Berry, but none involving models in pink hot pants. You see, Matthew Berry is not the only person who works at ESPN that I know.

In reality, it was John Clayton. That dude can rage.

Shocking I know that a Gawker media property got their facts wrong, and I don't really think it matters either way, but I just didn't want my buddy to not get his credit for tagging a hot model and have Matthew Berry steal his limelight.

EDIT 5: No, it wasn't John Clayton, and no I won't say who it was, it's up to him to say or not. But if it was John Clayton, that would have been the height of awesome.

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